• A new LGBTQ+ forum is now being trialed and there have been changes made to the Support and Advice forum. To read more about these updates, click here.
  • Hey Trainers! Be sure to check out Corsola Beach, our newest section on the forums, in partnership with our friends at Corsola Cove! At the Beach, you can discuss the competitive side of the games, post your favorite Pokemon memes, and connect with other Pokemon creators!
  • Due to the recent changes with Twitter's API, it is no longer possible for Bulbagarden forum users to login via their Twitter account. If you signed up to Bulbagarden via Twitter and do not have another way to login, please contact us here with your Twitter username so that we can get you sorted.

COMPLETE: [Teen] Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Unequivocant

Chapter 23: Fate
Chapter 23: Fate

The ashes of evil,

The tinders of light,

May still burn,

Through darkness and night.

The Guild is mighty,

And their leader as well,

But even the hardest souls

Have hearts of gold dwell.

~~~~

Four days prior…

Within a small, well-lit shack, a stack of heavy leather books settled onto a shelf, narrowly avoiding the nearby rack of glass tubes. The desk lay clear of debris, newly polished, the early morning light reflecting off it. No dust, no grime, no mess of any sort lay in the research center.

Martre Metagross shuddered and sighed in relief. Rust sprinkled off his body and pattered to the floor, a solitary mess on the newly swept wood.

He held a claw in front of his face, noting how neglected his iron frame was. Orange powder coated everywhere on his body except the silvery ‘X’ across his face and the claws on his legs. Twenty years of researching for Arthus, isolated from all other Pokémon, led to a lack of care toward his own appearance.

“Well,” he thought. A set of wire brushes and a bucket of powdery liquid floated from the floor to him. A sponge rose out from the bucket and wrung itself, then splatted against Martre.

It rubbed across the rust, then the wire brushes began scraping it away. Martre closed his eyes.

“If Gardner’s going to leave me here, I might as well look the part.”

~~~~

Outside the well-kempt command buildings at the southern end of the Iren Canyon, the families of the north end of the Guild—the former civilian district—woke up and carefully began their day. Breloom rushed through the dark alleys to trade for food, Murkrow watching their every move for their Honchkrow boss. Pokémon of diverse species all collaborated with each other, keeping in mind what happens to those that defy the Guild’s rule.

A Sawk tread carefully through the ruins of a once-grand multi-story smithy, stepping over rusted iron tools. The forge imploded on itself and any semblance of a bedroom in the loft had long since disintegrated. Nothing remained here save for ruins.

The Sawk stumbled and scraped against the dusty wood of the stair banister. He grumbled and wiped off his Guild band. “Trias, why are we even here?”

An Alakazam hovered over the debris and gently lowered onto the ground. He stood up and stroked his silvery moustache, his hand brushing the silver spoons hanging from a string around his neck. “Searle, you’re aware that things have been growing worse around the region.”

Searle pointed behind him and flicked his head to the right. “Uh, yeah. The only major city we have under control is Saunte, and—”

“Not that,” Trias interrupted. “Far, far worse things. Have you noticed that there’s been no wild Pokemon for miles? Not even the Vikavolt at night?”

Searle shrugged. “So what? They’ve been goin’ downhill for years.”

“It’s worse. Remember when you took guard duty for Harish two nights ago?”

Searle rubbed his back and groaned. “Do I ever.”

Trias folded his fingers together. “The lights you saw….those were ghosts.”

Searle’s eye grew wide. “Wait…all of those…were ghosts?” He shuddered and shook his head. “There were thousands of them! Where did they come from?”

Trias closed his eyes and lowered his head. “They came from the Ythereal Swamps—and they’re hungry.”

Searle stared up in thought, then blinked. “That’s…that’s not right. They never go out because of all the Life that’s there. Why go now?”

“Because there’s no more Life. It’s going away.”

“Where?”

Trias rubbed his eyes and said, “The Tree of Life.”

Searle stepped back, aghast. “You’ve…you’ve got to be wrong! There’s no way it’s—”

Trias grabbed Searle’s arm, and he fell silent. “I’m not wrong. I’ve felt it coming for a long while, and now it’s here. The Day of Desolation is upon us, and Arceus is preparing Equivos for it.”

Searle stood still, then sat down on a pile of rubble. He threw one aside and leaned his head against his arm. “Great. We’re all gonna die.” He looked up at Trias sadly. “Are you going to tell everyone else?”

Trias folded his arms and turned away. “No.”

Searle came to his feet and threw his arms out. “You’re just going to let them live out their lives like nothing’s happening?”

“Yes,” Trias replied, turning back around. “Because of Arthus. He’s dead set on killing Arceus and taking his place, and if he learned that the Day of Desolation’s nearly here, that’d only serve to hasten his plans. We can’t have that.” He gestured around them. “That’s why I’m telling you here.”

Searle rubbed his chin and sighed. “I guess you’re right, as usual.” He clenched his fist and growled. “But Arthus hasn’t been seen for weeks. It’s not like he’ll find out.”

Trias hovered into the air with his legs crossed and ducked under the ruined entryway. “Whether or not Arthus returns, we must keep my premonition to ourselves. It is something that has been prophesied for generations; the time for change has nearly ended.”

Searle followed him toward the light beyond the dark and disheveled buildings, beyond the dead streets of the north district. “What about everyone here? I mean, won’t there be some Pokemon who survive?”

Trias remained silent until they breached the light of the south district. “Yes. But the prideful that make our ranks will pass.” They watched Tauros cross back and forth, guided by Machoke. Bisharp ordered Pawniard into formation. Cacturne rooted themselves on the canyon wall, keeping a watchful eye for intruders. But none except them noticed the preemptive chill in the air.

Trias walked forward, and Searle followed. Trias only walk forward, yet everyone else seemed to flow around him, unaffected by his presence. Searle kept bumping into shoulders, struggling to keep up. Eventually, they both stood next to the Master’s Tower, where Trias bowed his head and closed his eyes.

He looked up. “The Guildmaster has returned.”

The gates suddenly swung outward, and all the Pokemon scrambled away to avoid being crushed. Gardner passed through the gate and growled, pointing behind him. “Go back to your kennel!” A pack of Houndoom dragging a sled rushed along the path toward a secluded corner of the Guild, barking as they went.

Gardner huffed, then looked over at the Searle and Trias. He came up to them and growled. “Did anything happen while I was gone?”

Trias stared at his scarred eye. “Nothing to report.” Searle shrunk away, holding ah and to cover his face.

Gardner waved them off. “Very well. Go about your business.” The Alakazam and Sawk did so, and the Dusknoir reached for the door to the tower. He stopped. He turned around and studied the masses crossing between the scattered storehouses and dwellings, all circling the Master’s Tower. Meanwhile, to the north, few Pokémon dared to come out into the light to ruin the attitude of the south.

Gardner shook his head. “This isn’t even worth saving.” He hovered to a secluded shed covered with metallic pipes and old lanterns. The curtains were drawn, the only sign of movement within being a loud scraping.

Gardner knocked on the door curtly. The scraping abruptly stopped, and the door swung outward, batting Gardner across his face and pushing him out of the way. A massive, shining Metagross glowered at him, dripping with solution and remnants of rust.

“I swear, if you’re pranking me—” He cut himself short, noticing an irritated Gardner rubbing the side of his head. Martre averted his eyes and muttered, “I…suppose I should have warned you about the door.

“Won’t matter before long.” Gardner entered and shut the door behind him just as the main gate was also closed. He took a brief look around and wiped a finger across the desk in the center of the shack. “I see you’ve cleaned up—finally.” He rubbed his finger and returned his attention to Martre. “You look like a civilized Pokemon instead of a depraved hermit.”

Martre’s eyes flashed. “I hope you’re here to do more than insult me.”

Gardner crossed his arms and hovered around the desk, sitting on the edge of it. “I got to Arthus, and he managed to make Hoopa fix the Seal without releasing him.”

“Wise move. Now we only have an insane murderer to worry about,” Martre nonchalantly said, making a basket of berries hover from the desk toward him. He psychically lifted a berry and brought it to his mouth.

“I was there so he could have Hoopa kill me.”

Martre choked on the berry and coughed, his metal clanking with each heave. He calmed himself and exclaimed, “He used you?”

“Yes,” Gardner grumbled. “He managed to fool him, but he didn’t tell me beforehand. I was practically dead!” He smacked the desk and shouted, “The next time I see him, I’ll rip that precious pendant from his dead body!”

Martre set aside the basket of berries and stomped closer to Gardner. “That’s suicide. You’re lucky he isn’t here, or he might’ve just killed you right there.”

Gardner blinked, sliding off the desk. “Wait, he’s not back? He was only taking care of Cassia and her posse of outcasts. Why in Equivos would he not have come back?”

“Maybe he went directly to Deitae?”

Gardner shook his head, holding his chin. “No, that can’t be it. If he did, we would know; we’d all be dead.” A dull roar came from outside, and Gardner looked out the small window to see all the Guild Pokemon running toward the main gate, calling out for someone.

Gardner and Martre rushed out of the room and saw the main gate thrown open, with everyone gathered around what lay in the center. The Dusknoir hovered over the crowd and bellowed, “What’s this all about?” He saw the focus and his maw hung open. “Oh.”

~~~~

Minutes earlier, in the Faylen jungle, an early morning breeze passed over the remains of the Arceist temple. Trumbeak warbled once more in the surrounding canopies, flapping through the leaves in search of berries and nuts. Emolga flitted alongside them, chittering away.

Far below, deep within the crumbled temple, the many broken bricks and statues created a compact network of narrow tunnels and caverns, each slowly collapsing from the weight above them. No light reached the lowest of the caverns, where the floor of the temple used to be. The air grew staler as dust choked the interior of the mountain.

Within one of the few pockets that remained after the collapse, a still form stirred. Flat on his back, his claws twitched, and his eyes fluttered open. He opened ice-blue eyes and pushed up against the rocks that buried him. He emerged with a cough, then searched the darkness as his vision grew clearer.

Arthus held his head as he rolled onto his back, then started to push himself up with his other hand. He seethed and clutched his leg, still swollen. He looked up, ignoring the blood dripping from the gashes across his body. Dust and pebbles fell from the cracks between the rocks that formed his prison.

A blue light came from his chest, and he held up its source: The Seal of Creation, as perfect as it was when Hoopa had repaired it. “At least I still have—”

He stopped. He dropped the Seal and studied himself. “I’m…I’m back! He’s gone! “He laughed but stopped as he realized something. “Cassia.” He groped in the darkness, crawling around in search for her. He found nothing of her.

Arthus forced himself to stand despite his injury and held the side of his head. “Cassia! Can you hear me?” No response came as his voice echoed.

Arthus snapped his claws, creating a small flame on the end of one. ‘I’m not leaving without her.’ He doubled over and doused the flame, clutching his chest. He soon stood again and studied his hand. “Out of Life energy,” he croaked. He looked down at his injured leg, which looked marginally better than he last remembered. The cavern shook, and Arthus froze. It soon settled, but several larger rocks fell.

Arthus hastened his pace, crawling through the narrow passageways. He managed to get into the next room and saw a dull red glow spread across the floor.

He set a hand on it and gasped as Life rushed into him, healing his cuts and soothing his leg. He forced himself away, retracting his arm. “Grom’s Life energy.” He looked toward another passage, limping toward it. “But Cassia.”

The cavern shook again, and Arthus avoided the falling rocks, leaning against the wall to relieve weight from his leg. “Cassia!” he called. He made it to the next room and stopped.

Underneath a boulder was Cassia, her back facing Arthus.

Arthus ran to her and pushed against the boulder, grunting. It moved slightly but rolled back to its previous position. Arthus’ body glowed red as he pushed again with a roar, throwing off the boulder and slamming it against the far wall. The cavern quaked, and even larger boulders fell.

Arthus held Cassia and supported her with his shoulder. He grit his teeth, the pain in his leg growing as he he pressed on to the exit. He looked up and saw pebbles falling and ceiling loosening above the tunnel.

He rushed through, making it inside just as it was covered. The tunnel itself started to collapse, and a dull roar echoed through what remained of the temple as the higher levels crashed to meet the bottom.

Arthus made it to the mouth of the tunnel and was thrust forward by the force of it collapsing. He and Cassia fell against the floor, more Life energy seeping into them. Arthus grabbed Cassia’s claw and punched into the stone with his other hand. Crimson tendrils emerged and dragged them under the earth just as the remains of the temple buried them.

Arthus instantly felt a pull as he entered the Life network, and saw that the epicenter was a monstrous entry, sapping away the rest of the Life in Equivos and destroying what remained. Even the pathway he traveled through was deteriorating quickly—as was Cassia.

He turned to her and saw a bright white glow fading into the stream. He pulled her closer and embraced her, protecting her Life with his own. They arced toward the surface, the tenacity of the Tree of Life nearly drawing them in.

They emerged at the gate of the Guild, skidding against the coarse soil. Arthus groaned, pushing himself up as his vision blurred. The gate was closed.

He crawled toward it, dragging Cassia with him as he dug into the ground to pull himself closer. His vision grew dimmer and dimmer as he knocked against the door with all his might, then passed out as it was opening. He heard the muffled voices of Pokemon surround him, then silence.

~~~~

Three days later…

Gardner waited outside a beige building, crossing his arms and bowing his head as he leaned against the wall. The other Guild Pokemon continued with their day, attempting to ignore the fact that Arthus Zoroark was in critical condition—along with his adopted daughter.

The door opened and a Comfey drifted out, holding a small piece of paper in its hands. Gardner stood straight and turned to the Comfey. “Well?”

The Comfey studied the paper, her flowers hanging behind her. “Arthus and Cassia will recover—barely. I’m not familiar with how Life energy works outside of Ghost types, but it seems to be helping their healing process.” She rolled up the paper and picked up her flowers again. “Still, Cassia’s suffered a nasty head injury, and Arthus’ leg looked like it was crushed. Ordinarily, I’d keep them here for at least a month, but I have no idea what will happen with Life.” She floated off and said added, “Some Ghosts will be coming by to give them more Life; I’ve noticed that they stop healing as quickly when that glow goes away.

Gardner turned away from the Comfey and toward the door. He looked down at his hand. ‘It’s now or never.’ He clenched his fist and pushed open the door.

In a tiny room coated in beige paint, sunlight leaked through the open window. Beds lined the opposite walls, each with white linen and soft pillows over its frame. On the tables next to them were bowls and platters, ready for their future occupants. On the wall adjacent to them, cabinets loaded with medicine and supplies surrounded the windows, hanging above a counter with a bucket of water and a set of cloths.

Cassia slept in a bed on the far wall, lying on her back with a bandage wrapped around her head, along with others scattered around her body. Arthus was on top the bed next to her, his back turned toward Arthus. His leg was set in a cast, and he appeared still.

Gardner rolled his arm and approached him silently. He slowed his gait, opening his maw. His hands exuded a chilling aura, and they came within inches of Arthus’ back. Gardner could almost feel Arthus’ Life seeping into his body. ‘This is for—’

He stopped. Arthus held Cassia’s limp hand with both of his own. He studied her sorrowfully, his normally-cold eyes having a warmth that Gardner had never seen—until now.

The Dusknoir closed his maw and dissipated the chill in his hands. He clasped them together and stared at the side of the room. He cleared his throat, and Arthus looked up at him.

“Oh,” he said. He sat upright with a moan, letting go of Cassia’s hand and turned to face Gardner. He set his cast down gently, the hardened Ariados silk keeping it strong. “I didn’t hear you come in.”

“…Well…I am a ghost,” Gardner replied, forcing a smile. Arthus smiled back, chuckling. Gardner’s smiled disappeared immediately after. ‘He…he never laughs…not like this.’

Arthus wiped his nose and looked over at Cassia. “I’ve been keeping an eye on her to make sure she recovers well. I don’t think she’ll have any memory loss, or anything else really; our control of Life makes us rather durable.” He set his hand over Cassia’s and sighed. “Still…I wish this never happened in the first place.”

Gardner sat on the bed next to Arthus’, unsure of how to react. “How did you get hurt? I don’t recall you getting a scratch since you released me…until now.”

Arthus winced, holding his casted leg. “I managed to trap everyone inside the temple, as planned. Matheus and Lawrence proved more troublesome than expected, and right when I had them, Grom had pulled off his brace.”

Gardner’s maw dropped. “What? That’s suicide!”

Arthus nodded, grimacing. “Indeed. He started chasing me and began destroying the temple. I tripped, and he stepped on my leg. Cassia was in front of me trying to get his brace back on.” He closed his eyes tight. “I thought she died right there. Grom wasn’t in control of himself, sure, but I wouldn’t have hesitated to attack him if I could.”

Gardner pointed at the Seal of Creation, which still hung from Arthus’ neck. “So you didn’t capture Matheus?”

“No.” Arthus held it up, giving it a disapproving look. “And honestly, I want to be done with this entire business. It’s caused nothing but grief for myself and others around me.”

“You…mean capturing Arceus?”

Arthus dropped the Seal carelessly and rested his head on his arm. “No. I’m considering just throwing it into the sea and forgetting about it.”

Gardner narrowed his eye and stood up, towering over Arthus. “You’re not the Arthus I know. You might look and sound like him, but you aren’t as—”

“Callous? Temperamental? Murderous?” Arthus finished, tiredly listing them off.

Gardner blinked, lowering himself. “Well…yes.” He rubbed his arm and stared at the ground. “It’s just…I obeyed you because you were all those things. I always feared for my life whenever something angered you, and even when you were calm, I never knew when you’d come around and nearly pull out my eye.” He sat on the bed again and rubbed his eye. “This is all so…disconcerting. I don’t know what to think.”

Arthus sat a moment longer, then cautiously stood up and smiled. “I’m not sure what to think either.”

Gardner uncovered his eye and cocked his head. “What changed you? Why are you suddenly so…so…” He rolled his eye and spat, “Nice? You don’t even care about the Seal anymore.”

Arthus gently paced up the hallway, holding his hands behind his back. “This is the real me. The Arthus you’ve known was my…shadow, so to speak. He’s all my worst qualities but magnified.” He tapped his head and said, “He must’ve been driven back when the temple landed on me. I’ve no idea if he’s truly gone, but at least my mind is free of him for the time being.”

“And how did this…shadow, come to be in the first place?”

Arthus forced a smile, turning away. “That is a story I’m not ready to tell yet.”

Cassia took a larger breath, shifting slightly. Arthus gestured to Gardner, then to the door. “Would you give me and Cassia some privacy? I have some things to clear up between us.”

Gardner blinked and shook his head briefly. “Er…yes, Arthus, sir.” He stood upright and began toward the door.

Arthus grabbed Gardner’s shoulder, causing him to turn. “Please, call me Arty.”

Gardner only stared at him, wide-eyed. “Yes…Arty.” He broke away from Arthus’ grip and rushed out of the room. Arthus only shook his head, sitting back in his bed and holding his hands.

Gardner burst out of the double doors and panted, holding his head. “I must be going mad—a world where Arthus isn’t waiting to kill someone? Or even use the Seal?” He grabbed his head and groaned. “This place must be getting to me. I have to get out of here.”

He saw Martre walking toward the medical center with a pair of Lampent hovering behind him. Gardner came between them and asked, “What are you doing?”

“Giving Arthus and Cassia more Life energy. What’s got you so wound up?” Martre asked.

Gardner eyed the doors, then looked back at Martre. “I’m warning you now: Arthus isn’t quite right in the head.” Martre gave him a cold look. Gardner shrugged and said, “Alright, more so than usual. He’s suddenly treating others nicely and insisting on being called, ‘Arty’. He doesn’t even want to use the Seal anymore.”

Martre stepped back, and the Lampent looked at each other with confused expressions. The Metagross clamped his teeth, then said, “He did mention having the temple collapse on him. Maybe he’s suffered a head injury?”

Gardner humphed, moving away. “Don’t know, don’t care. I’m headed off to Saunte to deal with those idiot captains, Valder and Derak—and to clear my head. Arthus was just—” He shuddered. “Bizarre.” He hovered to the far side of the Guild, where the Houndoom had previously brought his sled into storage.

Martre’s insides whirred for a moment as he considered the implications of Gardner’s claim. “I must evaluate him to see if he is…well, any worse than he was before.” He gingerly stepped inside, and the Lampent followed, carrying more stores of Life for the Zoroark to consume.

~~~~

A Zoroark stood in blackness, still. No sound or sight crossed its path for what felt like hours. A black Golurk glowing with Life appeared, standing at attention.

“Grom?” the Zoroark asked.

Grom didn’t hear. The brace over his chest loosened and fell off, dropping into the black void below. The crack in his chest surged, and he crouched, leaning toward the Zoroark.

He bounded forward, making no sound except a high-pitched whine. The Zoroark attempted to jump out of the way, but Grom diverted his path to meet it. The Golurk grabbed the Zoroark, his victim fully expecting to die from the oncoming explosion. The Golurk lowered his head and whispered five words:

“I’ll always be with you.”

The blackness was consumed by white, and the Zoroark awoke.

~~~~

Cassia stirred under her covers. A bandage wrapped around her head, chest, and limbs, each fresh and clean. Her fur was shiny and smooth, brushed free of imperfection.

She sat upright and gasped opening her eyes. She breathed heavily, looking around the room in confusion. “W-Where am I?” She turned to the table and noticed two brass bolts sitting next to a small bowl of Oran berries.

She picked up one of the bolts. “…Grom…” Her eyes widened. “Lawrence?” she called. “Matheus?”

“They aren’t here.”

She froze.

“They escaped before the temple collapsed. I have no idea where they went after that.”

She knew that voice.

“We were lucky to get out ourselves. If it weren’t for Grom—”He stopped himself. “I’m over here, just so you know.” Cassia slowly turned to face the other Zoroark. Bandages were wrapped around his chest and arms, and a sizable cast was wrapped around his leg. his fur was disheveled, and around his neck was a simple golden pendant glowing with pure blue light. “Arthus?”

He smiled. “It looks like your memory’s intact despite the nasty hit you took.” He stood up shakily, rubbing his arm. “You would’ve been asleep for weeks if it weren’t for the Life that Martre brought it. It’s only been three days, and you’re nearly right as rain.” He winced and sat down on the bed again. “Of course, I suffered more. But we’ll both be right as rain within a few days.” He chuckled. “Oh, I forgot.” He took an Oran berry from the bowl and held it out to her.

“Welcome home, Cassia.”
 
Last edited:
To start off with, I'm addressing some of the changes. The sequence of events is clearer in my mind now. So, in that regards, it paints a much clearer picture. A lot of the names that are dropped are still utterly meaningless for me. For example, who the heck is Laryon and why should I care about him at all? But, well, that can't be helped at this point. I would just advise once you start posting Legends Awakened that you state very clearly that it should be read before Unequivocant... and also add a line into your opening post here stating this story should be read after Legends Awakened for the best experience.

One issue that your new changes bring up, however, is Arceus himself. If I read the changes to Bonus Chapter 2 right, Arceus knew what made Arthus go careening off the cliff of sanity and refused to tell anyone. That... really doesn't sound like a benevolent, all-loving god. That sounds quite the opposite, actually, like someone extraordinarily manipulative, who's willing to employ lying and deception to see their will become reality. I bring this up because I don't think this is inetional on your part. The whole Arceist concept involves celebrating his good deeds, accepting him into your live, and following his teachings. But if I lived there, I'd find it hard to take that stuff to heart when a lot of bad things have happened thus far in Equivos. It could lead a reader to conclude that Arceus (and all the other Legendaries, for that matter) either A) is not as good as we're being led to believe or B) just doesn't care. And that's a problem because that lends a lot of credence to all of Lawrence's skepticism from early in the story... when your intention is to have him be proven wrong. Is that making sense? Looking at the story thus far, there is far more evidence of suffering and godly neglect in Equivos than there is of good. I think Negrek raised similar concerns, which is why you made some changes. But to me, it reads like they've gone in the wrong direction. I could understand it if you were planning to have the heroes meet Arceus and realize "Wow, this guy is an awful excuse for a god." But nothing these characters have said leads me to believe that's the intention here.

I guess what I'm trying to say here is Arceus better have one heck of a miracle lying in wait for the climax of the story. Otherwise, I'll be hopping on board the "Zamasu did nothing wrong" train. :p

Onto the chapter proper, then. At first, I wasn't entirely sure why were suddenly going back to the subplot with Matre becoming Guildmaster, but it became clear to me that this is a villain chapter, of sorts. Technical nitpick, even with Pokémon logic, I doubt a Torracat could survive being starved for weeks. Mane's body would've shut down by that time; best case scenario he'd be in a hypoglycemic coma and wouldn't be able to straight up eat a berry. He'd need liquids. Sorry, that's just the medical researcher in me talking. I did like the immediate differences in Matre's leadership style. It's far more rigidly logical, which is what I'd expect of a Metagross.

The next scene confirms my suspicions. They lived! ... sort of. More on that in a second. Because I want to focus on Gardner and his thinking, first. You told me that he's quite desperate to stay alive (like a certain Dusknoir residing in a dark future, I see what you did there). And I get that. But it feels rather... damaging to his character arc thus far to have the first thing he do when he wakes up is start thinking about Arthus. You had a whole act dedicated to him realizing Arthus is a miserable wretch. In what seemed like their final moments, Arthus was prepared to ditch him, too. But you have Gardner hoping Arthus is alive? That really rubbed me the wrong way and felt like it broke the characterization you had built up for him. Gardner discovers Grom's old Life reserve and you tell us, the readers, that there's plenty of Life flowing through it: "there's enough down there to last me weeks." That, coupled with the fact that it'd only take him five days to return to the Guild, creates every indication for him to leave Arthus for dead. I would firmly expect him to do that.

But what does he do instead? Give Arthus the Life equivalent of CPR. Everything you had set up in the third act felt like it'd been swept under the rug with that gesture... and it blatantly went against what you had set up at the start of the scene. Gardner could've taken all the Life and just slinked off somewhere. Or, better yet, he could've used that revitalizing energy on Cassia (since he ends up getting her out). I get that you needed to bring Arthus back somehow, but this honestly felt like the absolute wrong way to do it. The fact that Gardner's lamenting his actions right after bringing Arthus back just makes me wonder, "Well, then, why did you do it in the first place?" Fast-travel to the Guild (which he was even skeptical of going back to) feels like a shoddy reason. Which gets even worse in the following scene where Gardner is mentally cursing out Arthus and immediately begins planning to escape him. But, like, he had the perfect opportunity to leave Arthus to die! He shouldn't have had a reason to need to do this anyway. Why couldn't he have just stayed in the forest... by himself? At least he'd be safe that way. I am legitimately confounded by his actions.

I suppose you could change the scene to where the one and only way Gardner can save himself is to wake Arthus up and fast-travel back to the guild. If you removed any mention of there being a fairly big Life deposit, it might work. That would, of course, raise issues of "How does Gardner have enough strength to revive Arthus, then?" In which case, I think it would make far more sense to reframe that entire scene to focus on Gardner's will to live... not with the collapsed temple, but with the Day of Desolation. I realize this is just my opinion, but it would make far more sense for Gardner to realize the repaired Seal means that he's going to be killed off by Yveltal (or some sort of apocalyptic scenario) and that, in his desparation, the only possible thing he thinks of that could work is to revive Arthus and get him to fix this mess so he won't die. And then maybe change the conversation with Matre, too. Have Gardner explain that they're all doomed if they can't convince Arthus to undo his actions with the Seal, only for Gardner to realize that that's not going to happen and that, yeah, he might've just royally screwed up by bringing Arthus back. Then he could start thinking about fleeing. That is the only way I could see this sequence of events unfolding and making sense. Otherwise, in my opinion, Gardner is acting extremely out of character... and that makes the chapter fall apart for me.

I apologize if any of this sounded harsh. I'm not a huge fan of being critical. And I may be reading this wrong. But when I find something glaring, I just end up focusing on it and blotting everything else out. It's like a really bad itch you can't scratch. DX
 
To start off with, I'm addressing some of the changes. The sequence of events is clearer in my mind now. So, in that regards, it paints a much clearer picture. A lot of the names that are dropped are still utterly meaningless for me. For example, who the heck is Laryon and why should I care about him at all? But, well, that can't be helped at this point. I would just advise once you start posting Legends Awakened that you state very clearly that it should be read before Unequivocant... and also add a line into your opening post here stating this story should be read after Legends Awakened for the best experience.

I can agree. Unequivocant was originally designed to be a sequel in the first place, so it stands to reason that I make it as such once Legends Awakened begins.

One issue that your new changes bring up, however, is Arceus himself. If I read the changes to Bonus Chapter 2 right, Arceus knew what made Arthus go careening off the cliff of sanity and refused to tell anyone. That... really doesn't sound like a benevolent, all-loving god. That sounds quite the opposite, actually, like someone extraordinarily manipulative, who's willing to employ lying and deception to see their will become reality. I bring this up because I don't think this is inetional on your part. The whole Arceist concept involves celebrating his good deeds, accepting him into your live, and following his teachings. But if I lived there, I'd find it hard to take that stuff to heart when a lot of bad things have happened thus far in Equivos. It could lead a reader to conclude that Arceus (and all the other Legendaries, for that matter) either A) is not as good as we're being led to believe or B) just doesn't care. And that's a problem because that lends a lot of credence to all of Lawrence's skepticism from early in the story... when your intention is to have him be proven wrong. Is that making sense? Looking at the story thus far, there is far more evidence of suffering and godly neglect in Equivos than there is of good. I think Negrek raised similar concerns, which is why you made some changes. But to me, it reads like they've gone in the wrong direction. I could understand it if you were planning to have the heroes meet Arceus and realize "Wow, this guy is an awful excuse for a god." But nothing these characters have said leads me to believe that's the intention here.

There is one thing to counter that point: it isn't Arceus' place to intervene in history. Yes, horrible things happened thanks to Arthus' fall from grace, but as Matheus explained in Chapter 19, there are laws that were created to keep the Legends in check--and the Seal of Creation was made as a safeguard in case the Legends become too manipulative. More details will come to light involving this, but the main point is that Arceus is restricted from interacting with Pokemon aside from granting blessings to those who follow him.

I'd rather not bring up this point here, but I guess you can make a comparison to God not doing anything to stop horrific events such as WWII or any other war we may have had. Horrible things happen because of people going down the wrong path, but we still believe there is good in this world.

I guess what I'm trying to say here is Arceus better have one heck of a miracle lying in wait for the climax of the story.

More will come clear on Arceus' place in this story in time.

Onto the chapter proper, then. At first, I wasn't entirely sure why were suddenly going back to the subplot with Matre becoming Guildmaster, but it became clear to me that this is a villain chapter, of sorts. Technical nitpick, even with Pokémon logic, I doubt a Torracat could survive being starved for weeks. Mane's body would've shut down by that time; best case scenario he'd be in a hypoglycemic coma and wouldn't be able to straight up eat a berry. He'd need liquids. Sorry, that's just the medical researcher in me talking. I did like the immediate differences in Matre's leadership style. It's far more rigidly logical, which is what I'd expect of a Metagross.

I'll change Mange's line from weeks to days, as I can understand your point. And I'm glad you appreciate Martre's difference in leadership.

The next scene confirms my suspicions. They lived! ... sort of. More on that in a second. Because I want to focus on Gardner and his thinking, first. You told me that he's quite desperate to stay alive (like a certain Dusknoir residing in a dark future, I see what you did there). And I get that. But it feels rather... damaging to his character arc thus far to have the first thing he do when he wakes up is start thinking about Arthus. You had a whole act dedicated to him realizing Arthus is a miserable wretch. In what seemed like their final moments, Arthus was prepared to ditch him, too. But you have Gardner hoping Arthus is alive? That really rubbed me the wrong way and felt like it broke the characterization you had built up for him. Gardner discovers Grom's old Life reserve and you tell us, the readers, that there's plenty of Life flowing through it: "there's enough down there to last me weeks." That, coupled with the fact that it'd only take him five days to return to the Guild, creates every indication for him to leave Arthus for dead. I would firmly expect him to do that.

But what does he do instead? Give Arthus the Life equivalent of CPR. Everything you had set up in the third act felt like it'd been swept under the rug with that gesture... and it blatantly went against what you had set up at the start of the scene. Gardner could've taken all the Life and just slinked off somewhere. Or, better yet, he could've used that revitalizing energy on Cassia (since he ends up getting her out). I get that you needed to bring Arthus back somehow, but this honestly felt like the absolute wrong way to do it. The fact that Gardner's lamenting his actions right after bringing Arthus back just makes me wonder, "Well, then, why did you do it in the first place?" Fast-travel to the Guild (which he was even skeptical of going back to) feels like a shoddy reason. Which gets even worse in the following scene where Gardner is mentally cursing out Arthus and immediately begins planning to escape him. But, like, he had the perfect opportunity to leave Arthus to die! He shouldn't have had a reason to need to do this anyway. Why couldn't he have just stayed in the forest... by himself? At least he'd be safe that way. I am legitimately confounded by his actions.

I suppose you could change the scene to where the one and only way Gardner can save himself is to wake Arthus up and fast-travel back to the guild. If you removed any mention of there being a fairly big Life deposit, it might work. That would, of course, raise issues of "How does Gardner have enough strength to revive Arthus, then?" In which case, I think it would make far more sense to reframe that entire scene to focus on Gardner's will to live... not with the collapsed temple, but with the Day of Desolation. I realize this is just my opinion, but it would make far more sense for Gardner to realize the repaired Seal means that he's going to be killed off by Yveltal (or some sort of apocalyptic scenario) and that, in his desparation, the only possible thing he thinks of that could work is to revive Arthus and get him to fix this mess so he won't die. And then maybe change the conversation with Matre, too. Have Gardner explain that they're all doomed if they can't convince Arthus to undo his actions with the Seal, only for Gardner to realize that that's not going to happen and that, yeah, he might've just royally screwed up by bringing Arthus back. Then he could start thinking about fleeing. That is the only way I could see this sequence of events unfolding and making sense. Otherwise, in my opinion, Gardner is acting extremely out of character... and that makes the chapter fall apart for me.

I understand your points. I did spend the entire last act showing how Gardner was willing to get rid of Arthus, and he did have the perfect way to do it by simply leaving him there. But I think I approached this scene the wrong way, and it all started with his initial scene escaping from the temple. More on that a little later.

I had trouble writing this sequence of events in a logical way, and did what I thought was best. This particular sequence of events has to involve the following plot points in order for the story to come to its proper conclusion. Gardner must:

  • Save both Cassia and Arthus.
  • Talk to Martre.
  • Resolve to escape from the Guild.
As for your suggested changes, I agree that the fast-travel should be the only way to return, but the Life deposit has to stay, as Gardner will not have the energy needed to revitalize Arthus and himself, no matter his will. He isn't really aware of the Day of Desolation coming, as he only really learns of the oncoming disasters when Martre explains them to Gardner. Thus, that cannot be his drive. Really, it is his own desire to live that makes him save Arthus.

I do like your idea of him trying to convince Arthus to use the Seal for a different purpose, though. I could have Martre mention the fact that Yveltal had escaped from the Mountain of Rebirth when Arthus escaped, and that he would do more damage than any ghost or storm can do. That would cause Gardner to try and intervene in Arthus' plot later. Come to think of it, it would make a nice nod to a plot point in Legends Unraveled, where Arthus originally took Yveltal's power and went on to try and take Arceus'. That plot point won't be present in Legends Awakened though, so it won't mean much to Arthus now.

Now, back to the point involving the initial scene with Arthus absorbing the Life of the Liepard, and later other Pokemon. I think that this should be changed to Gardner still stuck under the temple, unable to shift into his gaseous form due to his tiredness. When he manages to reach Grom's remnant life, he realizes there isn't enough time for him to escape with his usual methods, and thus has to rely on Arthus to escape, despite his better judgement. That, I think would resolve any plot issues.

I apologize if any of this sounded harsh. I'm not a huge fan of being critical. And I may be reading this wrong. But when I find something glaring, I just end up focusing on it and blotting everything else out. It's like a really bad itch you can't scratch. DX

You've been a reliable reviewer so far, and that hasn't changed. Gardner's breaking of character was a huge mistake on my part, and needed to be fixed; I'd rather not have a repeat performance of Forgotten Isles' poor character handling.
 
There is one thing to counter that point: it isn't Arceus' place to intervene in history. Yes, horrible things happened thanks to Arthus' fall from grace, but as Matheus explained in Chapter 19, there are laws that were created to keep the Legends in check--and the Seal of Creation was made as a safeguard in case the Legends become too manipulative. More details will come to light involving this, but the main point is that Arceus is restricted from interacting with Pokemon aside from granting blessings to those who follow him.
I guess that's true. I suppose that the big issue for me is that Arceus (and the other Legendaries) have physical forms. Assuming you're basing Arceus on God (capital 'g' for the Judeochristian variant b/c hey, I pray to him, too), there's a bit of a disconnect for me. After the creation of the world, God acts through prophets. But in Equivos, it mostly seems like the Legendaries are still the ones doing things to shape the world. Matheus is the closest we get to a prophet, but b/c he's explicitly referred to as "The Legend," that, to me, lumps him in with the likes of, say, Hoopa or Yveltal. I'm sure the additional details will eventually clear this up for me. But I think this is another instance where you would've been better off not holding back said details. If you had told me upfront what the consequences are for Legendaries interacting with mortals (say, for example, some sort of apocalyptic event), then I wouldn't easily understood it.

I'd rather not bring up this point here, but I guess you can make a comparison to God not doing anything to stop horrific events such as WWII or any other war we may have had. Horrible things happen because of people going down the wrong path, but we still believe there is good in this world.
Quite true. I know that's an analogy that atheists put up all the time. I personally believe that, in this day in age, we just lack an individual God believes can serve as a prophet to channel His will, so nothing happens. But that's a discussion for PM's, I suppose.

As for your suggested changes, I agree that the fast-travel should be the only way to return, but the Life deposit has to stay, as Gardner will not have the energy needed to revitalize Arthus and himself, no matter his will.
What I really think would help, in that regard, is really hammering home how desperate Gardner is. Show us how much pain he's in. Show him in total agony. Show his mind racing, struggling to come up with a coherent plant so that he does end up settling on Arthus as the only means of not dying. For example, maybe have him consider using Cassia first, only to realize she can't fast-travel?

He isn't really aware of the Day of Desolation coming, as he only really learns of the oncoming disasters when Martre explains them to Gardner. Thus, that cannot be his drive. Really, it is his own desire to live that makes him save Arthus.
Ah, I see. In which case, you could have their conversation bring that up (as you do) and have Gardner realize that Arthus' actions will get him killed. And that fleeing could, at the very least, give him a fighting chance whereas staying means certain death.

I do like your idea of him trying to convince Arthus to use the Seal for a different purpose, though. I could have Martre mention the fact that Yveltal had escaped from the Mountain of Rebirth when Arthus escaped, and that he would do more damage than any ghost or storm can do.
I think it'd help things, yeah.

Now, back to the point involving the initial scene with Arthus absorbing the Life of the Liepard, and later other Pokemon. I think that this should be changed to Gardner still stuck under the temple, unable to shift into his gaseous form due to his tiredness. When he manages to reach Grom's remnant life, he realizes there isn't enough time for him to escape with his usual methods, and thus has to rely on Arthus to escape, despite his better judgement. That, I think would resolve any plot issues.
That sounds better. Just, as I said above, you've got to sell the audience on Gardner's desperation. Show us that Arthus is Gardner's lifeline in this instance and that there's really no other option. And that his fear of dying is immensely stronger than his hatred of Arthus. That would probably help the scene out a lot.
 
I guess that's true. I suppose that the big issue for me is that Arceus (and the other Legendaries) have physical forms. Assuming you're basing Arceus on God (capital 'g' for the Judeochristian variant b/c hey, I pray to him, too), there's a bit of a disconnect for me. After the creation of the world, God acts through prophets. But in Equivos, it mostly seems like the Legendaries are still the ones doing things to shape the world. Matheus is the closest we get to a prophet, but b/c he's explicitly referred to as "The Legend," that, to me, lumps him in with the likes of, say, Hoopa or Yveltal. I'm sure the additional details will eventually clear this up for me. But I think this is another instance where you would've been better off not holding back said details. If you had told me upfront what the consequences are for Legendaries interacting with mortals (say, for example, some sort of apocalyptic event), then I wouldn't easily understood it.

There are a few times I make reference to the purpose of the Seal and the consequences of Legends like Matheus going against Arceus' wishes, such as one of Hoopa's lines in Chapter 17:

Hoopa said:
"Constructed by the Creator himself, to bind his creations should they turn against him. Little did he know it could be used against even him.”

Though, I will admit, this purpose for the Seal of Creation is a recent development. In Legends Unraveled, it was simply a MacGuffin that was mysteriously created, and there wasn't much backstory about it. Now that I'm having to explain why Arceus created it, there should be more explanation of what the consequences for a Legend going rogue are. So, in a way, I did hold back the details, but it was because they weren't even there to begin with.

I think I need to place some more backstory of the creation of the Seal in the story. An apocalyptic event involving a Legend would be a good inciting event for it. Though, I'm not sure where I would place said explanation. I'd have to go back into the chapters to see where there is discussion involving the Seal and potentially its history.

What I really think would help, in that regard, is really hammering home how desperate Gardner is. Show us how much pain he's in. Show him in total agony. Show his mind racing, struggling to come up with a coherent plant so that he does end up settling on Arthus as the only means of not dying. For example, maybe have him consider using Cassia first, only to realize she can't fast-travel?

Initially, Gardner doesn't notice Cassia since she's entombed in a different section of the temple; it's only thanks to Arthus that he knows she's even alive, or accessible for that matter. I think that instead of him finding Cassia first, finding her second would be better, as it causes Gardner to reconsider using Arthus to escape, to revive Cassia and have her take him somewhere safe, then remember that she's unable to do that since she's never practiced that skill.

That sounds better. Just, as I said above, you've got to sell the audience on Gardner's desperation. Show us that Arthus is Gardner's lifeline in this instance and that there's really no other option. And that his fear of dying is immensely stronger than his hatred of Arthus. That would probably help the scene out a lot.

Agreed. That will be better to do if the entire scene is in a location where Gardner's life is in peril, rather than starting out with a scene where it isn't. Thanks for the suggestions.
 
I think that instead of him finding Cassia first, finding her second would be better, as it causes Gardner to reconsider using Arthus to escape, to revive Cassia and have her take him somewhere safe, then remember that she's unable to do that since she's never practiced that skill.
That works, too.
 
Alright, after going through the chapters, I've determined that the best point to go into the backstory of the Seal will actually be in Special Chapter 1, when Cassia is reading from the Tome jut before she realizes Arthus' evil. It will be a set of scripture detailing the events of the time period that the Seal was created, and at the end it will mention the Pokemon that will end up taking it. It won't take long to write, so expect the updated Special Chapter 1 to be up soon.
 
Chapter 24: Escape
Chapter 24: Escape

The Priestess is taken,

The Usurper reveals

The weakness of self

In his years of old.

The prison now broken,

The true mind commands,

But the Usurper still lurks

To fulfill his demands.

~~~~

In the medical bay, Arthus held the Oran berry out closer to Cassia with a smile. “Aren’t you hungry?” She rolled on her either side in the bed, facing away from him.

Arthus frowned, dropping the berry back in the bowl. “I understand if you’re upset—”

“Upset? Upset?” Cassia turned back around and threw off the covers, then stood up and jabbed a claw at Arthus. “You tried to kill Matheus and Lawrence, and it’s thanks to you that Grom died!” She breathed in sharply, sitting back down and breathing heavily.

Arthus stood up and reached over to her. “Careful, you’re still weak!”

Cassia pushed him back onto his bed. “Stay away from me!” she breathlessly said.

Arthus grimaced, clasping his hands together. Once Cassia’s breathing slowed, he said, “I…I never meant for any of this to happen. Really.”

Cassia glanced at him coldly, then turned away. “No. I don’t believe you.”

“This is far more complicated than—”

“Complicated?” Cassia exclaimed. “What’s complicated about it? You tricked all of us into going to the temple, and you said exactly what you wanted to do.” She fell onto her side, her back facing Arthus. “What do you want with me? You’ve got the Seal. That’s all you cared about.”

Arthus looked down at the necklace, then shook and tore it off his head. He threw it to the ground, the gem illuminating the air around it.

Cassia slowly turned around and stared at the Seal, then at Arthus, perplexed. Arthus exhaled slowly, combing a hand through his mane. “I hate Arceus. There’s no changing that. He shouldn’t have let us be free to choose evil.” He slowly pointed at the Seal. “But it’s thanks to that that my life’s been ruined. I want nothing more to do with it.”

Cassia gawked at the Seal, then at Arthus. “…Is this a trick?”

“If I was trying to trick you, why would I use the Seal?”

Cassia sat upright and crossed her arms. “So…so I’d trust you.”

Arthus blinked, then turned away. “Oh.” Both stayed silent, the only sound being the activity of the Guild outside.

Finally, Arthus turned to face Cassia. “I know why you wouldn’t trust me. I destroyed the Tome, I deceived you in the temple…and I killed your parents.” He held the side of his head. “Not to mention what I hid from you while I raised you. You had every reason to run away—and stay away.”

Cassia leaned closer and cocked her head. “You…you’re different. You always blamed others for doing something wrong, not yourself. You even said killing was fine because you’d bring everyone back anyway.”

Arthus grabbed the post of his bed tightly. “That wasn’t me. Not the real me, anyway.” Cassia continued to look at him in confusion.

He groaned and held his hands. “What I’m going to say here is going to be different than anything else. I know you don’t trust me—or love me either, if I assume correctly.” Cassia went to object, but Arthus held up a claw to stop her. “Just…hear me out. Say all you want afterward…just let me have my piece.”

Cassia stared, then reluctantly lay down on her bed and motioned for Arthus to continue.

Arthus nodded, leaned down, and began to speak. “There is a lot more to my story, but I’m…not confident that I’ll be able to say all of it. What you must know, however, is how I gained my power over Life—and, eventually, my split personality.

“I won’t go into detail about what lead me to seek such a thing, but I will say that I was tired of the constant suffering in the world. Even the Guild, what was the most perfect solution, failed on occasion. Towns got ransacked, Pokemon got trampled or starved. It happened far less frequently, yes, but it still happened.” Arthus grit his teeth. “It didn’t help that Matheus had gone off on his own selfish venture when things turned for the worse. I wanted to prevent that, and in a time of grief, without anyone to help, I determined that only one thing could help me: The Edge of Despair.”

Arthus searched around for a moment, then opened the drawer to the table next to his bed. A pad of paper and a several pieces of charcoal lay inside. He took them out and briefly sketched on the paper, then held the drawing out to Cassia. It showed a rune-covered dagger with an aura about it.

He tapped it and said, “This was a tool designed to give Pokemon control over Life. I don’t entirely know how it works, but the fuel to grant the power over Life was simple: The Life of the one you love most.”

Cassia paled, covering her mouth. “…That’s why you killed Corrina.” Her face burned, and she shouted, “You selfish, horrible—”

Arthus held his hands up and and exclaimed, “No! I never did it for myself! Believe me!” Cassia quieted but continued to give Arthus a cold glare.

Arthus set aside the pad and continued, “It is a long story on how I found it and worked up the nerve to actually use it. However, on the night my son, Erik, was born, I was told that Corrina was ill—that she’d die within hours, and that nothing could be done.” Cassia lowered the sketchpad, her anger turning to anxiety.

Arthus squeezed his hands together. “It…it was my last chance to use the Edge. Matheus was the only other one that could work, but by then…our relationship was already souring.” He sighed and pinched between his eyes. “And I doubt I could have done it anyway.”

Cassia sat upright in disbelief. “So…that’s why you did it? Corrina was just dying anyway?”

Arthus paused for a moment then his eyes glowed red. He growled and rubbed his eyes. “Yes…but it doesn’t change the fact that I killed her myself.”

Cassia crossed her arms and frowned. “I know this sounds harsh, but wouldn’t have been better to…let her die?” Arthus winced, then Cassia hurriedly added, “I mean, she’d still be fine in the Tree of Life, I’m sure, but then you…” she trailed off as Arthus stared at the floor, his hands shaking.

He held one up. “She…she would’ve been fine.” He closed his hand. “But…I wouldn’t have. I never told you this, but almost every time I’ve slept, even when I was a child, I was tortured by nightmares. They changed over the years, but I still had them. Only Matheus and Corrina knew how to help me when I wake. And with Matheus gone…” He choked up, holding a hand over his eyes. “I just…I just couldn’t live without her! Erik would’ve been without a mother, and I would’ve gone insane from my nightmares or my work at the Guild.” A tear trailed down his cheek as he uncovered his eyes. “It…It was only supposed to be temporary. She would’ve been back after I found the Seal and used it. In fact, I didn’t care if I kept Arceus after that; I just wanted Corrina back!” He sobbed, covering his face and heaving. Cassia cringed, nearly hugging him despite how she felt about him.

After a minute of crying, Arthus forced himself to calm and wiped away his tears. “It…it wasn’t that simple. Gregorius had put a…safety feature into the Edge. Upon use, it would give the owner control over Life…but it would also awaken his shadow.”

Cassia cocked her head. “Shadow?”

“Yes, shadow. A Pokémon’s shadow is all their worst qualities—and, to an extent, their opposite—all bundled into one personality. Some things remain constant, such as feelings toward others, but they are blown out of proportion—especially hatred.” Arthus shuddered, holding his hands over his ears. “He came without warning. Suddenly there was another voice inside my head, always goading me to make decisions I’d never make. I resorted to speaking to myself to make sure he didn’t interrupt me mid-thought.”

Cassia shivered as well, the very idea of her shadow spooking her. ‘All my worst qualities? What would I be like?’ She shivered again. ‘Dreadful.’

Arthus hung his head, his eyes growing distant. “But that wasn’t the worst of it. The shadow does more than simply toss his voice into your thoughts; it tries to destroy you.” He winced, holding his head. “He…pushes his will…into my body…he tries to be…the dominant mind…” He gasped, falling to his knees.

“Dad!” Cassia came next to Arthus and watched as Arthus grunted, clutching his head. He gently, barely shook his head, his muttering illegible. He grew louder, and he dug his claws into the wood of the floor. “Stay back…stay back!” He shot upright and screamed, his eyes wide with fright. Cassia fell onto her back, holding an arm in front of her and breathing quickly.

Arthus twisted his arms while his pupils dilated smaller. “Idiot! Your actions will doom everyone!” He twisted around, his eyes growing larger again. “I’m trying to save their lives!” Cassia’s eyes whisked to the Seal of Creation, which sat just behind Arthus’ feet.

Arthus twisted around again, cackling wildly. “Says the one who failed not once, but twice! You even failed to kill Matheus when you had the chance!” He screamed again, clutching his injured leg. “Because I was trying to save Cassia!”

Cassia dove under Arthus, reaching for the Seal. He stamped on the necklace’s chain just as Cassia snatch it back, pinning it between them. He leaned down and smirked, his head jutting to the side. “Can’t have that, now, can we?” Cassia panted, pulling at the necklace, still weak from recovery.

Arthus shook again, and he panted, grimacing. “You have to get out of here!” My shadow’s…nearly in control!” He seethed, lifting his leg and allowing Cassia to take the Seal. “Take it away! Far away! You can’t let me use it!”

Cassia scrambled back, holding the Seal up to her chest. She stood up and swallowed hard. “What about you?”

Arthus winced, looking up at her. “Just know that I love you, and if I had the chance—” He stiffened, and his eyes closed. “I would’ve given up…everything…for you.” He collapsed and fell still.

Cassia looked left and right, unsure. She ran to her bed and scooped Grom’s bolts from off the side table, then made herself invisible as she opened the window. She gingerly crawled out, granting one final look at Arthus. “…I wish it didn’t have to be like this.” She ducked out and closed the window, then entered the throngs of Guild Pokemon.

Moments after, Arthus’ eyes snapped open. He shot upright and twisted his neck, popping it. “Where did you go?” He looked under the bed and growled, his eyes glowing red. “You let her escape with the Seal!” He threw a nearby bed up, sending it crashing into another.

He gasped, clutching his leg. He glared at it, then sat on his bed and sliced right through the silk, revealing the still-swollen limb.

He wrapped both claws around it, then made it glow red. He clenched his teeth and seethed, “Must…get…that…girl….”

~~~~

Cassia passed between the thronging Guild Pokemon, ranging from Jumpluff delivering messages to Rhydon marching to the training ground. Tauros lugged enormous carts behind them, while Lycanroc snapped at their heels to direct them. Cassia tried her best to avoid them all, but her weakness from waking combined with her invisibility made several stumbles inevitable. Several times she fell, narrowly dodging contact from another. All the while she kept the Seal of Creation tight in her grip.

She tripped on a dip in the road and spread her arms to catch herself. Her claws grazed the back of an Alakazam in front of her, causing him to stop. Cassia scrambled up to her feet and tried to exit the crowd. The Alakazam lifted a spoon.

Cassia restrained a yelp as she was swept off her feet and forced to dangle in the air, completely helpless. The Alakazam looked in her direction and walked into a dark alley. Cassia followed, her heart beating rapidly.

When inside the alley, the Alakazam looked about briefly. He turned back to Cassia’s direction. “Show yourself.”

Cassia hid the Seal behind her back and let out a shuddering breath. Her illusion dissolved, and the graying Alakazam shook his head. “You shouldn’t have come back.” He lowered Cassia back to the ground.

She waved her free hand and said, “No, please, don’t say—”

“What’s behind your back?” The Alakazam grabbed a spoon hanging from his neck and made his eyes glow blue. Cassia’s other hand shot out from behind her back and revealed the Seal.

The Alakazam stepped back and dropped the spoon, aghast. “How in Equivos did you get that away from Arthus?” he hoarsely said. Before she could reply, he pushed her against the wall. A pair of Heracross passed by the entrance to the alleyway, not noticing them.

The Alakazam let go of Cassia and looked out the alley. “As much as I want to hear your story, this isn’t the place.” He turned back to her. “I’ll take you to my home. You can tell me everything there.” He grimaced and pointed at the bandages layering her body. “And I can help you heal.”

Cassia shuffled back, holding the Seal close. “How do I know I can trust you?”

The Alakazam looked over his shoulder, then pulled down his armband, revealing a weathered, folded piece of paper. He took it out and unfolded it, revealing a younger version of him standing with a Lucario, Electivire, Gothitelle, Conkeldurr and Blissey, all in front of the Master’s Tower.

As Cassia studied it, the Alakazam said, “I am Trias, Guildmaster Calem’s former advisor.”

~~~~

In a dilapidated house in the corner of the Guild, a smug Sawk chopped fresh lettuce on a chipped countertop, humming merrily. No doors lead in or out of the room save for the main entrance. A bunk bed sagged in the corner, and the kitchen that the Sawk worked within set a stove and washbasin next to each other. On the other side of the room was a table with several stacks of ragged cards, a stuffed chair with a rickety wooden one next to it, and a great window granting a view to the entire rest of the guild. A skylight above allowed the sun to peek out and illuminate the room.

The Sawk scooped the lettuce off the cutting board and plopped it into a bowl. He held it up and plucked some grape tomatoes out of a basket, then tossed them in the bowl. He then drizzled a bottle of viscous white sauce over it.

He chuckled and pulled open a drawer. “I love Tapu’s Days.” He pulled out a fork and hopped over to the bunk, then slung himself onto the top and set the bowl on his lap. “Ma always said to eat my greens—and boy, do I!” He stabbed into the salad and held the bite up to his mouth, sighing.

The door opened, causing the Sawk to lower the fork and frown. Trias hurriedly walked in and waved, a smile plastered on his face. “Afternoon, Searle! I see you’re having your weekly salad bowl.”

Searle’s eyes flitted between Trias and the bowl. “Uh…yeah.”

Trias drew the curtains across the window overseeing the Guild, then promptly closed the door. He stroked his silvery mustache and said, “Would you happen to have a problem with…a guest coming over?”

Searle shrugged and lifted the fork again. “Nobody comes over, so why not?”

Trias nodded sagely and flicked his head forward. “Go ahead.” The air behind Trias shimmered, then revealed a bandaged-up Zoroark with bright blue eyes sheepishly holding her hands behind her back.

Searle’s jaw dropped, then his fork. He scooted back in the bed, leaving the bowl to tip over and drench the covers in ranch. “I-It’s you! You nearly killed me!” He focused on Trias and jabbed a finger at Cassia. “What is she doing here?

Trias held up his hands and said, “Easy, Searle. She’s on the run from Arthus, and she happened to take something we’ve been after for a long time.”

Searle eyed her suspiciously. “What do you mean?”

Trias gestured to Cassia. “I mean this.” She held up the Seal of Creation, its perfect gem shining bright.

“What?” Searle shot upright, only to knock his head against the ceiling. He groaned and held it, seething. “How did she get it?”

Trias waved down quickly. “Just come down and talk to her, she won’t bite.” Searle cautiously crawled around the spilled salad and climbed down the ladder. He kept his palms straight and ready for attack.

Cassia lowered the Seal and held her hands behind her back. “Thanks…thanks for telling me about Arthus…about who he really was.”

Searle blinked and lowered his hands. “…Really? Weren’t you upset?”

Trias came over to him and set a hand on his shoulder. “Searle, if she didn’t come to us that day, she wouldn’t have spread Arceus’ words across the region as she did. Without her, all of Equivos would be lost.”

Searle paused a moment, then rubbed the back of his neck and looked away. “Well…that’s true.” He shrugged and slowly let out his breath. “I guess we’re good then. Sorry I put it so rudely before, but I wasn’t in the best mood then.”

Trias patted Searle’s arm and said, “He got his arm broken by Gardner as punishment for tampering with the tax records of a poor family of Dragonite.” He stopped and looked over Cassia again, remembering her bandages. “Gracious, I’ve had you walk the entire way here and not even offer hospitality.” He turned to Searle and pointed at the door. “Would you mind getting a bag of Sitrus and Oran berries from the warehouse? She is still recovering from some terrible injuries.”

Searle looked at Cassia up and down and nodded in agreement. He came close to Trias and muttered, “Fill me in on the Seal.” He jogged out of the room and into the Guild, careful to swiftly close the door.

Trias motioned to the cushioned chair. “Go on, sit.”

Cassia did so, her tired limbs aching. “Can we trust him?”

Trias promptly nodded and dug through the cabinets underneath the counter. “Searle might be rash at times, but he is as loyal as can be.”

She looked around for a moment, then furrowed her brow. “What do you do in the Guild, anyway?”

Trias pulled out a collection of small bottles and began swirling them, inspecting their contents. “I now work as the treasurer for the Guild. I know everything there is to now about finances.” He gave Cassia a hopeless look. “And what a boring subject it is.”

Cassia picked at a loose thread in the armchair. “So, you’re pretty high-ranking then?”

“What are you implying?” Trias replied, closing his hand over a bottle.

Cassia gestured to the room around her. “This just isn’t very…nice.” She cringed and shrunk into the couch. “Sorry, that was rude.”

“Say no more, say no more.” Trias took a rag from under the counter, came to Cassia, then sat on his knees, uncorking the bottle. “Even for my humble tastes, this is a rather sorry place to live.” He looked up and sighed. “How grand this Guild used to be. Now it is barely a shadow of its former self.”

Cassia leaned her head against her hand and said, “I thought that since the Guild was taking everything that they’d use it to make their lives better. I guess I was wrong.”

“The fools who do the taking don’t use it responsibly, that’s why.” Trias dabbed the contents of the bottle on the rag. “They burn the art and woodwork, gobble the food and drink.” He corked the bottle and slammed it on the floor. “And desecrate everything else.”

“How did you avoid Arthus when he…massacred, everyone?” Cassia struggled to say such things, now that she knew his true nature.

Trias gave her a suspicious look, then said, “As you may know, Alakazam such as myself are extremely intelligent. My kind strive to constantly learn so we can keep our minds sharp, and that often leads to reading—and a lot of it.” He held up the rag and said, “Would you mind if you took off your bandages?” Cassia began doing so gratefully; they had grown very irritating against her skin.

Trias continued. “I’ve always been an avid reader—even when I was an Abra—but the one book I constantly returned to was the Arceist Tome.”

Cassia tore the bandage off her head and smiled. “You read the Tome?”

Trias nodded. “Indeed, I can quote the entire book by memory!” He twisted his mustache and looked up wistfully. “But it isn’t as satisfying as reading it personally and experiencing the…peace, it has within its pages.”

Cassia took a deep breath and lay her head on the back of the couch. “I feel the same way.”

Trias looked back down and held the rag close to Cassia’s leg. “Would you mind if I used this? It has healing properties.” Cassia nodded quickly, and as Trias rubbed her bruised limbs with it, he said, “There was another skill I learned: healing. I’m quite the herbalist, you know.” He shook his head. “Anyway, back to how I’m still here. While reading from the Tome about a year before Arthus returned, I began making connections with the events prophesied and the present time: weather patterns, rumors, the like. The unusual events that year all began to come together, and I knew that the final age was coming for Equivos. So, naturally, I tried to warn Calem.” He stopped, continuing to apply his solution on Cassia.

Cassia shifted slightly, unused to such contact. “What happened?”

He sighed and lowered the rag. “As honorable a Pokemon Calem was—bless his soul—he was very stubborn. He didn’t believe Arthus really existed, let alone that he was coming within a year. Despite my pleas, he ignored me, even if he listened to my advice otherwise.”

Cassia curled her finger around a length of her mane. “I’m sorry for what happened.”

Trias waved a hand and continued his application. “Don’t be. You had nothing to do with it; Yveltal was set to come forth at one particular time, one that none could change.” He uncorked the bottle and spread more across the rag. “When the storms hit Serenita, I teleported to my meditation cave in Xilo, and I hid for over a week as I watched Arthus from afar and saw how I could trick him. I introduced myself as a new Pokemon, and I got instated as Treasurer, with Searle as my assistant.” He lowered his head as he rubbed the solution along Cassia’s arms. “I wasn’t sure that I could. Calem was a dear friend, along with many other Pokemon in the Guild. But I knew that I would be needed to help however I could.” He dwelled on that for a moment, then faced Cassia. “But enough about me. I want to know how you got the Seal out of Arthus’ clutches—and how you ended up in such a terrible state.”

Cassia hesitantly recounted what had happened within the Arceist Temple and what occurred in the medical bay. She highlighted Arthus’ transformation of personality, and how he may not be the Pokemon he appears to be. Trias finished applying his solution on Cassia and had since put away the bottle. He paced around the room and stroked his mustache in thought. Cassia felt heavy and drained as she considered all that had happened to her—such as the loss of Grom.

When she finished, Trias stopped and held his hands behind his back. “So…Arthus is of two minds…literally.” He closed his eyes and tapped his fingers together. “This makes sense. In the few records that remain from Arthus’ time period, he was described as suffering a sudden change of personality in times of stress or anger. This ‘shadow’ must have taken over at some point and refused the real Arthus any control.” He pointed at the Seal laying on Cassia’s lap. “We can’t allow him to have that. Despite the diminishing Life supply, he can still travel to Deitae and take Arceus’ power. Once you have your strength back, you have to go.”

“But how?” Cassia asked, shakily coming to her feet. “I have nowhere to go and I have no idea where my friends are if they survived!” She held a hand over her face and sighed, “I can’t even finish teaching about Arceus without a Tome.”

Trias stopped tapping his fingers. “You need a copy of the Tome?” She nodded.

He considered for a moment, then said, “I have access to one.”

“Really?” Cassia ran up to him and said, “Where is it?”

Trias paced away and bowed his head. “As treasurer of the Guild, I have permission to access the vault to keep track of its inventory, including rare artifacts. Gardner had secured another copy of the Tome to be studied by Martre, but when he found nothing of use, he had it stored away. I read it when I do my daily rounds, so it won’t be much issue to give it to you.”

Cassia gave Trias a brief hug. “Oh, thank you! Thank you so much!”

The Alakazam regained his composure and cleared his throat. “However, the vault is within the Master’s Tower, and given that Arthus has likely brought the Guild into high alert to find you and the Seal, that may prove difficult.”

Cassia wrapped the Seal’s chain around her wrist and kept it tight. “I can hide us both when we go for it, then I can head straight for Saunte afterward. Sound good?”

The door burst open and Searle rushed in, holding a satchel next to him. He closed the door and shouted, “Better get going quick! Arthus is going to turn every house inside out before long!”

Trias snatched a spoon around his neck and caused the satchel to fly from Searle’s hand into Cassia’s. “Eat quickly. There’s no telling how long we have before Arthus comes.”

Cassia looked inside and saw two bags of berries. She opened one and started eating the Oran berries inside, her strength gradually returning to her. All the while, the joy of obtaining a new Arceist Tome, the sadness of her losses, and the fear of Arthus’ shadow conflicted with each other.

~~~~

All throughout the Guild, Pokemon of all shapes and sizes searched for Cassia and the stolen Seal of Creation. Lycanroc and Mightyena tracked her scent, Murkrow flew above, and there were constant checks given to Pokemon entering or exiting their homes to ensure that, disguised or not, Cassia would be found.

Cassia crept through the pacing crowds of Pokemon as Trias hovered overhead, both completely invisible. Searle paced ahead casually, taking occasional glances above and behind him. Cassia and Trias made way to the Master’s Tower as Searle marched on to the main gate.

Cassia froze as a Lycanroc squeezed by her, constantly sniffing the ground. It walked away, not seeming to notice her. Cassia stared at it curiously. ‘How didn’t he smell me?’

‘My healing solution masks your scent as well—at least with how liberally I used it.’

Cassia looked up at him in surprise. Before she could say anything, he thought, ‘It’s not impossible for psychics to breach a Dark Pokémon’s immunity; it is only very difficult, hence why I have yet to stand up against Arthus.’ He pointed ahead with a spoon. ‘Stand near the entrance and wait for my signal.’

She made it to the doorway of the tower, which had echoing clangs emanating from it. Trias hovered higher and looked through the window. He held his hand out for Cassia to stop.

The door swung open and Martre tromped out in a huff. “Curse Arthus for his irresponsibility.” He soon melted into the crowd.

Cassia caught the door as it closed and looked up at Trias. He gave a nod and brought himself down. They both slipped into the tower.

Cassia cast away their invisibility as Trias locked the door. The stairs ascended immediately in front of them while a small hallway wrapped to their left. Trias cautiously stepped into it and thought to Cassia, ‘The vault is just down here.’ She followed.

At the end of the hallway was a square iron door set with five dials, all with a ‘0’ above them. Trias held his spoon forward and made the dials spin, finally setting them to ‘9-4-3-1-5’. The vault clicked and had a panel slide back, revealing a key-shaped hole. Trias stuck his spoon inside it and thought, “I would ordinarily request for Gardner to open it, but I know how to lock-pick with my powers.’ The inside of the lock clicked, and the door swung outward.

Cassia peeked inside, expecting to see overflowing piles of coins. Instead, scant bags of gold remained, alongside various weapons and scrolls. At the back of the dark inside of the vault was a gold-colored gate. Beyond it was a vast array of artifacts—along with a familiar book.

Trias stopped next to the gate and held his spoon up to the lock, but then stopped. He stepped back from the gate. ‘This metal blocks telekinetic abilities; I can’t affect it.’

Cassia stood in front of the gate. ‘I have a way.’ She held onto the bars and willed Life into her hands. They radiated with energy and made the bars glow red. She grunted and pushed away, and the heat emanating from her hands softened the bars. They pushed apart, allowing enough room for her to cross through.

She carefully stepped inside, studying the items on the shelves. A wide array of weapons, jars, and other artifacts resided within, all with some vicious aura surrounding them. But she wasn’t focused on those. She cared only for the most important object in the room: the final copy of the Arceist Tome.

Cassia gingerly picked it up, the arc emblazoned on the cover seeming to glow in the dim light. She smiled and held it tight against her chest. She stared at the shelf it sat on, then at the object covered with a white sheet. Curious, she peeked underneath. Her eyes widened, then she uncovered it completely, revealing the Prison Bottle, the eyes on its cap glowing dimly.

Trias noticed and thought, ‘Best leave that be, Cassia. Gardner had that secured in here after you and Arthus returned.’ He shuddered. ‘Hoopa is even more dangerous now that Arthus had managed to trick him.’

She stepped as if to leave but gravitated back to the bottle. ‘Trias…I feel like I need it.’

‘Why? He won’t listen to reason, and anything he could grant would come at a severe price.’

Cassia paused, unsure of what to do.

My servant is needed. Take him.

Without hesitation, Cassia took the sheet and wrapped the neck of the bottle in it, negating the vile voice within. She set the bottle next to the Tome, still wrapped in the cloth. ‘I feel as if…Arceus, needs it. Maybe he needs Hoopa to do something for him?’

Trias sighed and started to turn back. ‘Better it’s out of the Guild’s—’ He froze.

Martre hovered at the door of the vault, his eyes glowing brightly. “Wrong move, Trias.” The door slammed shut and whirred as it locked.

“No!” Cassia and Trias cried, both running to the door. Cassia beat against it with her hands while Trias attempted to undo the locks, but both were to no avail. Martre’s muffled shouts came from outside.

Trias strained against the bolts, but dropped both his arms and said, “It’s useless. Martre’s restricting the bolts and door with his own powers.”

Cassia breathed quickly as she searched for some way out. She beat against the walls of the vault scraping away the gold and scrolls on them. The vault made no echoing clangs, unlike the door itself.

Cassia stopped and considered it. “Trias, what’s behind this wall?”

“Nothing except the outside,” Trias said, closing his eyes. They snapped back open. “Of course!” He held up both his spoons and focused on a single point on the wall. His eyes glowed blue, and the point started to bulge outward. Sweat beaded across Trias’ brow and his hands shook as the wall continued to push outward.

Cassia noticed the strain and grabbed Trias’ shoulder. Life flowed from her into Trias, filling him with power. He bellowed and slammed the spoons together, sending a psychic surge into the wall. It stretched into a large hole, revealing the dusty exterior of the Guild. Dust and broken bricks littered the ground in front of them, yet no Pokemon seemed to be visible.

Trias fell to his knees and let his spoons fall. He breathed haggardly as he looked up at Cassia. “Go.” Voices rose beyond the vault as they moved toward the outside.

Cassia stooped and helped Trias back to his feet. “You can’t stay here; they’ll kill you!”

Trias broke from her grip and pointed at her bag. “You have to carry the Seal as far away from here as possible! My life isn’t worth that!” He wearily picked up his spoons and crossed them against his chest. “Now go, before they can see you!” Shadows raced toward the vault opening.

Cassia groaned and turned invisible just as Martre and a mass of Lycanroc and Mightyena surrounded the exit. He burst into the hole and quickly looked left and right. He came up to Trias and stared him down. “Where is she?”

Trias’ eyes glowed. “Gone.” He roared and sent out a burst of bright violet energy toward Martre.

Martre dug his feet into the iron and sent out his own burst, and the two clashed, pushing against each other. As the clash continued, Trias’ spoons began to bend, while the cross on Martre’s face shined.

Martre forcefully stepped closer and said in struggling tones, “You’re foolish…brash…and most of all…” He punched Trias across the chest and made him crumple. His psychic burst immediately dissolved, allowing Martre’s to engulf him and scaled his skin.

He screamed as Martre punched him over his head and crushed his chest with another leg. He leaned down and made Trias’ squinted eye level to his. “You were always the weak link.” He raised a leg and made the claws glow yellow.

“Get away from him!” Cassia reappeared from the darkness and leapt on top of Martre. He stumbled back and roared, struggling to reach her. She clawed forward and slashed Martre across his eyes, making him scream in agony and clamp his legs over them.

The Lycanroc and Mightyena snarled and leapt after her, fangs bared. She dodged each one and scratched each one, making their Life stream to her in gaseous red strings. They fell to the ground and shivered, left with only enough to survive.

With her foes defeated, Cassia fell next to Trias and lifted his head. She cringed and said, “I—I should have done something sooner, but I—”

Trias lifted a burned hand, stopping her. He forced a smile. “Martre is…” He stared at the still-screaming Metagross. “…was…a powerful…opponent…you stood little chance…head on.” He held on to Cassia’s hand. “Leave now…before Arthus comes.” He coughed weakly as his eyes lowered. “Arceus…be with you.” He breathed out a final time.

Cassia cringed as tears came to her eyes, but shouts from the outside caused her to regain her composure. She turned invisible once more and sprinted out of the vault and toward the gate, leaving the other Guild Pokemon in the dust.

Searle leaned against the gate impatiently, staring at the Tower. “I hope they’re alright…” He felt someone grab his hand.

He yelped and scrambled away. “Gah! You’re here!”

Cassia briefly appeared. “Hurry! Get the door open!”

As she disappeared, Searle squinted his eyes and said, “Where’s Trias?”

He felt a push against his shoulder. “Just do it!”

Searle pushed against the door with Cassia’s help and said, “Alright, alright! You can tell me later!” The gate opened just wide enough for them to slip into the outside.

Both ran toward the deadened tree just outside the gate. Cassia reappeared and started to run down the path to the tree’s right.

Searle stopped next to the tree and yelled, “Where are you going?”

Cassia came to a stop and said, “I’m going to Saunte, where else?”

Searle groaned and pointed to the tree. “This is the way! There’s a big Life Deposit here just waiting to be used!”

Cassia ran back to him and tugged at his arm. “I can’t go that way!”

Searle tugged back. “Why?”

“I never learned, that’s why!” Cassia cried.

“What?” Searle pulled them both back and caused Cassia to stumble and fall next to the tree, causing the contents of her bag to be visible.

She coughed, and Searle rubbed pinched the bridge of his crest. “Augh, I should’ve seen this coming.” He knelt next to Cassia and pointed at the base of the tree. “I saw Arthus do this sometimes while I was on guard duty. All you have to do is put your hand in the ground and sort of…hitch a ride, I guess, then just get off at the deposit you want to.” Shouts rose up over the wall, causing Searle to turn back. “Better be quick, or else—”

He gasped, falling back. A shimmer appeared behind him and darkened into a Zoroark, breathing haggardly and burying his claws into Searle’s back.

Cassia gasped and scrambled back, focused on the Sawk. “Searle!”

Arthus tossed him aside and grinned maliciously, crouching low. “Disobedience only leads to Pokemon getting hurt, Cassia.” He held his claws out, shaking like the rest of him. “Give. Me. The. Seal.

Cassia briefly turned to the bag, then to the ground. “You told me to take it away.” She dug her claws into the ground and forced Life into it. “And you won’t stop me!” Giant red tendrils rose up around her and threatened to engulf her.

Arthus roared and snatched the revealed Seal from Cassia’s bag. She managed to grab hold of the chain as it flew through the air, and the two fought to keep hold of it as Cassia was being forced into the ground by the crimson tendrils. The veins in Arthus’ arm bulged as he was dragged forward by Cassia. She grit her teeth as she slowly pulled it forward.

The tendrils collapsed over the chain and broke Cassia’s grip, fully enclosing her in its trap. Her wail was cut off as she became a beam of red light and surged to the east.

Arthus breathed heavily, then smiled as he held the Seal up to his face. “Finally.” His eyes widened as he realized his mistake. “No…Cassia!” He pulled at his mane and screamed, “Not now! Not now!” He dug his claws into the ground to follow Cassia, but no tendrils rose up to meet his call.

He shook and stared at the deadened tree. “Curse Arceus…” He stood up. His shoulders tensed. “This is all your fault!” He punched the tree with such great force that it instantly turned to splinters at his feet.

He seethed as he lowered the Seal around his neck. “No matter…even if she is taken by you, I’ll bring her back.” He ran across the rest of the canyon and to the south, his ice-colored eyes burning.

“I’m only one deposit away from taking your place.”

~~~~

In the Revenant Forest, the enormous guardian Trevenant looked beyond his domain and toward the southern sea. Dark clouds roiled in the distance, booming and flashing as the tumbled toward the mainland. The spindly trees rustled in the chilling wind, and the Phantump ducked underneath his branches.

Hanging from his head was a small hut, where the Buneary children lay nestled, fearing the worst. With his Life, the Trevenant kept them warm, and fed his Phantump with it as well. Despite the world growing darker, he remained a light for their young lives.

The Trevenant rumbled. “Desolation shall soon come.” The soil churned beneath him. “Yveltal will descend.” His roots rose up, groaning as they lifted the Trevenant. “I must protect the next generation.” With giant, lumbering steps, he made way to the coastline, his Phantump children following his footsteps. Other ghosts of all sorts followed as well, sustained by his vast well of Life.

The Trevenant looked to the east. “I shall return, Creator. As will the children of Equivos.”
 
Last edited:
I think the changes to the last chapter make it read better and more logically. They're more in-line with what I've come to expect from Gardner. With that said, his conversation with Zacheus could benefit from a few tweaks. Namely, you need some lines where Gardner knows the stuff he's saying to Zacheus isn't necessarily true, but it's the best thing he can think of to get to him. Because having Gardner say, "I'm fearless," is a straight-up lie. He's terrified of Arthus and more terrified of dying. The other bit is that he sounds strangely heroic with his "take a stand against the world" spiel... which is a complete flip in personality. His motivation seemed to be "I'm getting out of here to save my own hide." So, his speech to Zacheus should be rephrased so that he knows he's making it up on the spot and doesn't entirely believe it... but thinks Zacheus will take the bait. And then, maybe, having him see the conversation b/w Arthus and Cassia could push him more towards "I want to do the right thing," vs "I want to save my own hide." It would be more fulfilling because, otherwise, there's no real transition toward his more heroic nature.

You finally give us Arthus' backstory. Unfortunately, this is another situation where we'd have benefited if you'd actually written Legends Awakened first, but I have to go with what we have. In the future, perhaps, someone who reads that story before this one may, in fact, have some sympathy for Arthus. This sure seems like an attempt to make him look sympathetic... but it didn't work for me. However, in this case, it isn't a problem. Because you immediately have Cassia call him out on his hypocritical nonsense, which was exactly my problem with his whole backstory. It's clearly an instance of "he who fights monsters becomes a monster himself." She hit every nail on the head that, while some bad stuff has happened, he brought a lot of his own suffering on himself and allowed an evil force to take root in his mind. I still question how easily he was able to get the Seal. I'd think something that important would be extremely well-guarded, but what do I know? Overall, I like this part as one of those scenes where the villain tries to drum up sympathy, only to have it go the other way and drive the target of their affection to hate them even more.

Not much to say about the escape scene. Martre went down surprisingly quickly, though I suppose if he's had his nose in books for 20 years he wouldn't be an adept fighter in the slightest. Good on Cassia for all that self-determination stuff, but was that really necessary? You've shown her to be an adept fighter, and yet suddenly she's wishing Matheus and Lawrence were there to protect her. You might want to rephrase any of those to "support" instead of "protect," because the latter makes her sound like a damsel in distress. And she's anything but that, as far as I'm concerned.

One last thing before I go:
You’re a monster.
Technically you're both monsters. Pocket Monsters. Ayyyyyyyyyyyyy... I'll shut up now. :V
 
I think the changes to the last chapter make it read better and more logically. They're more in-line with what I've come to expect from Gardner. With that said, his conversation with Zacheus could benefit from a few tweaks. Namely, you need some lines where Gardner knows the stuff he's saying to Zacheus isn't necessarily true, but it's the best thing he can think of to get to him. Because having Gardner say, "I'm fearless," is a straight-up lie. He's terrified of Arthus and more terrified of dying. The other bit is that he sounds strangely heroic with his "take a stand against the world" spiel... which is a complete flip in personality. His motivation seemed to be "I'm getting out of here to save my own hide." So, his speech to Zacheus should be rephrased so that he knows he's making it up on the spot and doesn't entirely believe it... but thinks Zacheus will take the bait. And then, maybe, having him see the conversation b/w Arthus and Cassia could push him more towards "I want to do the right thing," vs "I want to save my own hide." It would be more fulfilling because, otherwise, there's no real transition toward his more heroic nature.

I can agree here; Gardner has shown that he really is more of a coward than a hero. I can make revisions like this to better show his change.

You finally give us Arthus' backstory. Unfortunately, this is another situation where we'd have benefited if you'd actually written Legends Awakened first, but I have to go with what we have. In the future, perhaps, someone who reads that story before this one may, in fact, have some sympathy for Arthus. This sure seems like an attempt to make him look sympathetic... but it didn't work for me. However, in this case, it isn't a problem. Because you immediately have Cassia call him out on his hypocritical nonsense, which was exactly my problem with his whole backstory. It's clearly an instance of "he who fights monsters becomes a monster himself." She hit every nail on the head that, while some bad stuff has happened, he brought a lot of his own suffering on himself and allowed an evil force to take root in his mind. I still question how easily he was able to get the Seal. I'd think something that important would be extremely well-guarded, but what do I know? Overall, I like this part as one of those scenes where the villain tries to drum up sympathy, only to have it go the other way and drive the target of their affection to hate them even more.

Well, Legends Awakened was conceived after I began writing Unequivocant, so there wasn't much I could do. As for the hypocrisy of Arthus' backstory, it would be a lot clearer had I written Legends Awakened first, and readers would likely feel more sympathetic. Guess that's something that will have to be addressed later on.

Good on Cassia for all that self-determination stuff, but was that really necessary? You've shown her to be an adept fighter, and yet suddenly she's wishing Matheus and Lawrence were there to protect her. You might want to rephrase any of those to "support" instead of "protect," because the latter makes her sound like a damsel in distress. And she's anything but that, as far as I'm concerned.

Yeah, I can agree with changing 'protect' to 'support'. These scenes are needed because up till now, Cassia's been afraid of showing herself in public most of her life, and has relied on Grom, Matheus and Lawrence to help her in the times that she is discovered or breaks down. This is to show that she can be confident enough on her own to prove to the world that she is not like Arthus, without needing anyone else to do that.

Although, if this needs to be revised still, I can understand. I would rather not be rid of these scenes, but I may be able to address them better in the next chapter if needed.
 
Alright, made the changes; the chapter should be up soon. I was hoping to be finished with initial composition by Monday, but I doubt that will happen given what's been going on for me the past few days. I have Chapter 22 ready, though, and Chapter 23 is well on the way. Then I can outline the next story and make reviews for me to earn some fancy pieces of cover art! :D
 
Chapter 25: Reunion
Chapter 25: Reunion

Loss affects all,

But some even more,

Despite the faith and trust

They may hold dear.

Yet all will be well

After this time of woe,

For soon Arceus will come

And return his children to him.

~~~~

Cassia coursed through the spidery veins of Life, completely terrified by the scene before her. Crimson threads all interwove within each other in a vast blackness, all joining together at a maelstrom of Life, constantly pulsing in the utter darkness. But as she traveled, the Life unraveled, leaving fewer and fewer threads to travel through—including her own.

She felt the constant pull of the maelstrom to bring her closer, the light within her core throbbing in response. She struggled to keep her mind focused on finding a means to escape, but the threat of the maelstrom was ever-present in her mind as she traveled eastward.

She saw the vein she traveled through branch off to different points of light, all fading gradually. ‘Where do I go, where do I go?’ she pleaded, completely within the network.

There.

Her eyes snapped to a point of light above her. Its channel was soon approaching and would soon unravel by the disintegrating stream Cassia traveled through.

Left with no other clues, Cassia willed herself up into the stream and into the dot of light. She shot into it just as the light died.

She erupted from the ground and gasped for air. She crawled out from the soil and lay on her chest, completely worn from the ordeal. As her mind grew clearer, she recognized the environment to be the fringe of the West Kaena Woods…yet it wasn’t.

Even well into the autumn, Cassia had never heard the air so still. The trees were all bare of leaves, yet no musty scent accompanied them. No apples or berries were present, no wild Pokemon rushing past. All was lifeless and grey, just like the overcast sky.

The Minute Plains stretched in front of Cassia and resting in the center was the familiar city of Saunte. Smoke billowed from throughout the city, and light flashed alongside the cries of Pokemon. The grass—bright only several weeks ago—was dull and pale. No wind blew, allowing a foul odor of sickness linger. Autumn hadn’t yet ended, yet the season felt it had.

Cassia rolled onto her back and forced herself upright. She felt too tired for much else. All she could do was rest.

She opened her bag and reached for the remaining bag of berries but stopped. The clean leather cover of the Tome caught her attention and held it. Her mind filled with recent events, and a heavy weight set in her chest.

She reached deeper into the bag and retrieved two worn, brass bolts. She covered them and closed her eyes. ‘Grom…’ Her memories of the Golurk came rushing back, from their first meeting, to his ultimate demise. ‘He…he was always there for me…’ Her hands shook. ‘But now…he’s gone…’ A tear trailed down her cheek. ‘Just like Arianne.’ She held her hands up to her face. ‘Dad is out of control…I’ve lost Matheus and Lawrence…and Trias and Searle died protecting me.’

Grom’s bolts fell from her hands. ‘And now…I’m alone. Completely alone.’ She sobbed and pulled at her mane. ‘I…I could’ve saved them. If I had gone with her…if I had put back his brace…if I wasn’t so unsure.’

A connection formed in her mind. She looked up at the blank, grey sky. “Arceus…why? Why did they have to die? Why did Dad have to change, why did I lose Matheus and Lawrence? I’ve devoted my life to you…and here I am…” She stared at the bolts on the ground. “Alone.” She picked them back up and held them close to her chest. ‘I’ve saved so many…’ She lowered them back into the bag. ‘But I can never save the Pokemon I love.’

She kept crying for the next few minutes, caught in hopelessness. She felt nothing could bring her out of this pit of misery and loneliness—not even Arceus.

A glow emanated from inside the bag. Cassia wiped away her tears and peered inside, curious. The pages of the Arceist Tome glowed with golden light, so brightly that Cassia squinted.

She took the Tome out of the bag, and the light dulled. The light gathered into a single point in the pages, then crept into the air, becoming a familiar wisp of light. It swirled in the air, coming level with Cassia’s eyes. She studied it, entranced.

The wisp pointed at the book and dove between the pages. Cassia blinked and opened the Tome, flipping to the page. ‘Where are you taking me?’ she thought. She came to the page where the wisp resided, and she read the passage it highlighted with itself:

Pokemon that bear knowledge, emotion and willpower have power to choose evil as much as good. The consequences of any choice affect not just those who make the decision, but those who are directly affected. Evil subjects my creations to pain of all types, and that cannot be changed.

The wisp shot in between the pages once more, and Cassia followed, gathering an idea of what it was. ‘Arceus?’ She turned to the passage it landed on:

But I, Arceus, sorrow with those afflicted by others, no matter their pain. I wish only for joy amongst my creations, but the unrighteous desires of the world taint their lives.

The wisp moved once more, and Cassia began to realize what it was doing.

Do not think I am not present in your doings. I ensure that no pain is too great and no trial too daunting. Many are lost to the darkness of the world, but those who follow me are saved in the Tree of Life, returned to their loved ones and awaiting those yet to come.

The wisp moved once more, but before Cassia turned to the page, she considered the words it had shown her. ‘When I felt this way before, there was always someone to help me—Matheus, Arianne, Grom, even Lawrence.’ She rubbed her eyes. ‘They always said I was a good Pokemon, that I did nothing wrong….that I mattered to them.’ She set her claws between the pages the light defined. ‘I always felt better after they said those things…but…do I need them to know that those words are true?’

She opened the pages and beheld a magnificent work of art depicting Arceus enveloping a Sandslash in hundreds of threads of light. The Sandslash sat behind the body of a young Sand shrew, and tears could be seen on the Sandslash’s face.

Cassia set a hand against the wisps surrounding the Sandslash, suddenly feeling ashamed. ‘Arceus inspired them to help me. I could never have changed Grom before without him. Arianne would have died alone if Matheus hadn’t taken me to her. Trias and Searle…well, I didn’t know them for long, but at least Trias was content.’

The wisp circled the words accompanying the image, and as Cassia read them, the weight in her chest grew lighter and lighter.

Light cannot be seen without darkness to contrast it. Push is known with pull, and good is known from evil. Just as all of these, joy can never be known without despair. As surely as Pokemon will bear the consequences of others, so will they experience my blessings and the joy they bring.

Know now that you are never alone. I am always present, always listening; whatever trial you may be facing, I will always assist when you call on my name. My arms stretch across the whole of Equivos, touching upon Pokémon’s lives and making them for the better.

The wisp faded. Cassia studied the words, her smile broadening with every pass. She looked up toward the sun, which now shone through the overcast clouds. ‘I made Grom and Arianne feel joy in the time I knew them—and now they’ve returned to Arceus and the Pokemon they love.’

She closed the book and stood up, holding it close to her chest. ‘Arceus has always been with me, even as a Zorua! He showed me the light and brought me out of darkness! He helped me show others his light!”

She swung her bag over her shoulders and set the Tome within. ‘Arianne and Grom are always with me, just like Arceus! I am never alone!’ She ran down the hill toward the smoking city of Saunte. ‘I will find Lawrence and Matheus again, even if I have to go across Equivos all over again!’

She neared the walls of Saunte, and she narrowed her eyes. ‘And I will bring back the real Arthus.’

She stopped at the edge of Saunte and coughed, the smoke filling her nose. The buildings crumbled, and bodies littered the streets. Cries and screams echoed from the center of town, alongside the roars of a certain Guildmaster.

The plume of smoke passed, and Cassia instinctively reached into her bag. Panic flashed across her face as she realized something. “My mask! It’s still in the temple!” She considered what she’d do, but the peace she experienced before soon returned. She stood straight and secured the bag over her shoulder. “No…I don’t need it.’ She turned invisible and ran through the streets, one thought repeating in her mind: ‘I am Cassia Zoroark, daughter of Arthus Zoroark and priestess of Arceus. Arceus is with me, no matter how I appear!’

She ran through the alleyways and climbed up a stone tower near the plaza. At the top, she saw hundreds of Pokemon crowded together below her with dozens of Guild Pokemon keeping them back. Gardner Dusknoir stood in front of the now-destroyed castle that stood in the center of Saunte, and a certain Rhyperior and Feraligatr lay on the ground in front of him, scrambling away from him. Both were badly wounded, unlike Gardner, who remained free of injury.

Gardner’s fist rumbled with electricity as he approached them, his scarred eye glowing fiercely. “An entire city destroyed by your antics! I should have killed you long ago!”

Derak Feraligatr came to his feet and backed away, holding his wounded shoulder. “I-I-It ain’t our fault! Nobody listened to us!”

“Liars!” Gardner puffed into violet gas and surged toward them, a glowing fist within the center of the cloud. Valder and Derak both screeched and shot into the open door of a shack and slammed it shut. Gardner funneled into it and made the entire shack shake, along with making Valder and Derak scream further. It fell still and quiet, just like the remaining population of Saunte.

The cloud streamed back out and formed into Gardner. He rolled his neck and returned to the plaza. “Now with them taken care of, it’s time to bring this place back to order.” He paced in front of them and held his hands behind his back. “I have obviously grown soft to allow such idiots manage this place, but no longer! I will personally command the Guild here in Saunte and make it worthy of being the new Guild headquarters!”

“But what about us?” a certain Simisear cried.

Gardner searched the crowd for him, but to no avail. He held two fingers in front of his eye. “Either you’re with me.” He pinched them together. “Or you’re dead.”

Amidst the horrified gasps, a red ball of light gathered at the top of the tower. Gardner looked up and his maw dropped. “Arthus!” The Life Sphere shot toward him, threatening to consume him. The Dusknoir rolled to his right and watched the sphere bash through the castle and create a sizable hole through the solid stone.

All looked up to see a Zoroark standing at the top with a single hand extended. It leapt from the tower onto the roof of another house, then down another, and yet one more, until it finally leapt in front of Gardner and towered over him.

Gardner’s brow furrowed as he stood level with the Zoroark. “You.”

She leaned forward and said, “Leave. Now.”

Gardner reared back his head and laughed, much to Saunte’s confusion. He whirled on Cassia and swatted her away, then crossed his arms and said, “I don’t listen to the brat that scarred me for life!” He pointed at the jagged white scar across his eye and added, “Not to mention Arthus’ traitorous whelp!”

Saunte instantly murmured about Cassia’s identity, but she ignored them and stood straight, unfazed by Gardner’s blow. “Enough is enough, Gardner! You’ve ruined Pokémon’s lives for too long!”

Gardner slowly approached her, cracking his knuckles. “What, because I wiped those lying Arceists off the face of the earth? Because I burned all your precious Arceist Tomes?”

Cassia backed away, her claws glowing red. “Hate only leads to more hate. History repeats itself because Pokemon like you refuse to change.”

Gardner stiffened. Violet mist surrounded him. “So that’s it…hate.” He quaked as the mist grew larger. “I was imprisoned for over a decade…for snuffing out the children of the ghosts that tortured me. The ghosts that killed my guardians, the ghosts that nearly starved me. I scraped my way out, only for them to try and steal my success.” A pitch-black ball of electricity grew in his palm. “And you expect me to let weaker Pokemon conquer me?” He aimed the sphere at Cassia and spat, “There’s only room for one law: mine!” The sphere shot toward Cassia.

She ducked under it and ran forward, leaving the sphere to explode on a ruined shop and make it explode, causing Saunte to cry out in fear. She met Gardner head on and slashed across his chest. He melted into mist just as she struck and formed around her head, causing her to cough and wheeze.

A glowing fist thrust toward her face. She ducked once more and took in breaths of clean air. He dove toward her again, but she rolled across and shot a Life Sphere into the cloud. He screamed and spiraled back into the form, crackling with red electricity. Cassia leapt up to strike him, her eyes glowing red.

Gardner swung a left hook and clipped Cassia across her jaw, sending her into the roof of a tavern. Gardner hovered toward her and sent another punch toward her head. She twisted out of reach and made Gardner punch into the roof. He swung again with the same result. He finally swung his head forward and forced Cassia to slide farther underneath him. The entire roof collapsed on itself as Cassia leapt off and rolled onto the streets.

As the dust settled, Gardner erupted from the ruins and bellowed, throwing another Shadow Ball at Cassia. She narrowly dodged it and ran for him again. He threw another and clipped Cassia across her shoulder, causing her to cringe as she leapt forward. Gardner puffed into mist again and allowed Cassia to land right in his noxious body.

She coughed and wheezed once more, scrambling to escape his grasp. Gardner’s fist appeared once more and slugged Cassia across her face. Another did the same, and another. She fell to the ground and coughed as blood fell from her lip.

Gardner rematerialized and laughed haggardly, cracking his neck. He stood over Cassia and caused his arm to become enveloped in bright, crackling lightning. “I expected more from Arthus’ pet!” He threw his fist down toward Cassia’s head.

It passed through her and made her dissipate. Gardner’s eye widened, then narrowed as he searched. “You can’t hide forever, brat.” He kept his fists up, ready to contend with her.

Claws raked across his back, leaving viscous, black gas. Gardner seethed and whirled around, throwing a series of Shadow Balls behind him. All flew harmlessly into the air.

Gardner stood still, then held out a hand and belched out a puce fog, filling the entire area. He peered through it and saw a shape crossing through it, sprinting toward him.

Gardner swept to the left and allowed the shape to pass by him harmlessly. He grabbed its ‘tail’ and yanked it back, causing Cassia to scream and rematerialize. Gardner grabbed her neck and held her high. “Is that really the best you can do?” He threw her into the air and shot a Shadow Ball into her chest, sending her beyond the walls of the city and into the Minute Plains.

She landed in an explosion of soil. She groaned slowly pushed herself up, barely standing. Gardner barreled closer, but his slow gait allowed Cassia time to think. She looked to the heavens and cried, “Please, Arceus, do something!” A shadow ball spiraled directly toward her.

She leapt back and began running toward the forest. Gardner followed and continued throwing shadow balls, his scarred eye flaring with each one. She soon disappeared, but Gardner knew that she would inevitably go into the forest.

He entered and carefully searched around him “I know you’re here, brat.” Wind whistled through the bare branches, and the skies darkened with the thickening clouds.

A twig snapped. Gardner swung around and threw a shadow ball. It exploded against a tree and consumed it in a black explosion. Leaves rustled, and Gardner continued throwing shadow balls, each one failing to meet their target.

A blue light blinked into existence. Gardner extended his hand to throw a sphere but froze. His eye widened. “It can’t be.”

The light drew closer, and it revealed itself to be a Chandelure, moaning with the wind and creaking with every movement. It waved its many flames threateningly, each jetting forward to singe the Dusknoir. Gardner drew away, bumping into a fabric-like wall.

He swerved around and gasped, discovering that it was a large Banette, its floppy hands thrown into the air. Its zipper mouth opened and let out a mad cackle as it tried to snatch Gardner’s hand.

Gardner cried out and shot through the branches into the sky. He breathed quickly, his Life rising to a high.

A sword swung toward his throat.

Narrowly ducked underneath it and saw it was a Doublade, spiraling through the air with three others, all with their blades drawn. They all screeched a single word: “Liiiiife!”

Gardner returned below and puffed into gas, scrambling to run away. Other gaseous shapes joined him—a giant cluster of Haunter, all cackling wildly. Other denizens from the Ythereal Swamp followed it, all hunting down the Dusknoir.

Gardner threw back a shadow ball as he ran, which bashed into a Haunter and made it explode in black light. Two others replaced it and continued to close the gap between them. Their ethereal hands snatched Gardner out of the air. He screamed one final time.

Cassia oversaw his ordeal from the top of one of Saunte’s watchtowers. She turned away and muttered, “‘So shall your choices haunt you for destroying the lives of others.’” She slowly climbed down, eating the last of the berries she had.

Back in the plaza, the Guild Pokemon grew uneasy. A Gumshoos’ teeth chattered, a Hitmonlee’s legs quivered, a Skuntank nervously released noxious gas. That final, haunting scream lingered in their minds. Gardner had yet to return, and without his terrifying presence, their confidence waned.

Cassia suddenly appeared in the center of the plaza, and all turned to face her. Her face was bruised, and her body was scraped, but she was otherwise unharmed. “Gardner is dead.” The Guild Pokemon paled.

She pointed west. “Go back to the Guild and never come back, or I’ll make you go.”

They took off into the streets with no hesitation. They all ran into the plains toward the woods and the desert beyond, all wishing they never encountered her.

The Pokemon of Saunte remained standing where they were, unsure of what to think of Cassia. She took a deep breath, then sat on a pile of stone bricks at the edge of the plaza. She held a hand up to her face and made it flash red, much to Saunte’s surprise. She pulled it away moments later, and her face only had minor scratches, all closing rapidly.

She looked over to Saunte and smiled. “I can heal anyone who’s hurt.” She held a hand out toward them. “I won’t hurt you.”

None stirred. Faint mutterings spread throughout the crowd, and Cassia’s smile faded as her fears set in.

An Eevee emerged from the gathering, limping forward. She kept a foreleg close to her chest as she drew closer to Cassia. The Zoroark saw no fear in the child’s expression but could sense anxiety—especially from the Leafeon at the front of the crowd, who she figured was the Eevee’s mother.

The Eevee stopped at Cassia’s feet and looked up at her. She held up her injured leg. “Mama says I sprained it. Can you help me?”

Cassia smiled and gently lifted the Eevee onto her lap. “Yes.” She gently held the Eevee’s leg up and let Life flow from her palm into the injured limb.

The Eevee stared at the Life in wonder, but soon faced Cassia. “What’s your name?”

“Cassia.” She could feel the tissue beneath the Eevee’s skin healing.

The Eevee lowered her ears and turned away. “Mama always said I shouldn’t trust Zoroark.”

Knowing that they could both be heard, Cassia replied, “Well, what do you think?”

The Eevee hopped up and exclaimed, “You beat up that mean old Gardner for us! A bad Pokemon wouldn’t do that!” She winced and returned to sitting as Cassia continued to heal. “You even sound nice…not like that Arthus guy I hear about in stories.”

Cassia finished healing the Eevee’s leg, then leaned in close and said, “There’s good in everyone—especially Arthus.” She waved her off. “Now how about you show your mama?”

The Eevee stared at her leg in astonishment and flexed it, feeling no pain. She beamed and hopped off Cassia’s lap and to the Leafeon. “Look Mama, the nice Zoroark made my leg better!”

The Leafeon nuzzled her daughter’s head and laughed. She briefly looked over to Cassia and said, “Thank you.”

Cassia smiled and nodded. “You’re welcome.”

Slowly but surely, other Pokemon from the crowd came to Cassia with all manners of injuries—cuts, bruises, broken bones, stomach pains—anything that they thought could be healed by her. And she did, draining her stored life until she only had a small fraction of what she formerly had.

After the Pokemon of Saunte quieted their talk about their miraculous recovery, Cassia took the Arceist Tome out from her bag and leafed through it. “I have a message from Arceus for you. In Proclamation 21, Arceus tells us that light cannot be seen without darkness, good cannot be known without evil—right cannot be without wrong. There will always be Pokemon who choose the wrong decisions, just as there are those who make the right.” She closed the Tome, smiling as she studied its cover. “Whether we’re as happy as can be, or are in deepest sorrow, Arceus is with us. In this time of trial, Arceus saw your pain. He sent me to stop Gardner, and now that he and the Guild are gone, you are free.” She looked up and saw gracious smiles across everyone’s faces. “If you remember nothing else from me, please know that Arceus is always here. Many have tried to make you forget him, but they are wrong; he is as real as you and me.” She returned the Tome to her bag. “Do you understand?” Murmurs of agreement rung out throughout the crowd, and Cassia bowed her head and smiled.

Excited whispers and murmurs rose up from the back and traveled to the front as a someone passed through them toward Cassia. She lifted her head to see who it was. A silver-furred Lucario pushed through the crowd, wearing a leather cloak and hat.

He turned around to a Watchog and said, “Could you tell me what just ha—” He saw Cassia and stopped. His arms fell limp. “…Cassia?”

Cassia stood up in astonishment. “Matheus?”

Matheus processed her presence for a moment, then a smile stretched across his face. He held his arms out and exclaimed, “Cassia! You’re alive!”

Cassia ran up to Matheus and laughed, hugging him close. “I missed you!”

Matheus returned the hug, wincing as he wheezed, “I can tell. I missed you too.”

Cassia pulled away and laughed again, then said, “Where did you go to? And where’s—” She stopped, her smile dissipating. Standing behind Matheus, several feet away, was Lawrence Stephenson, holding a bag in either paw.

The bag dropped from his paws. “You’re—you’re—” He struggled to speak as he staggered forward, his eyes wide and jaw slack.

Cassia turned to him, breathing only one word: “Lawrence.”

At the sound of his name, Lawrence sprinted forward and swept Cassia off her feet. They spun briefly as Lawrence hugged her tight, tears brimming his eyes.

They stood still for a moment, then Lawrence whispered, “I thought you died.”

Cassia shook her head slightly. “Nearly.” She nuzzled into Lawrence’s neck. “I missed you so much.”

Lawrence rested his head on top of hers. “I missed you too.”

Everyone was silent, allowing them their time together.

Matheus stared upward, idling toward them. He tapped them both on the shoulder and whispered, “I know this is your sweet moment, but how about you catch up with each other,” he took a glance behind him, “away from prying eyes?” He nodded his head toward the crowd of Saunte Pokémon who couldn’t stop staring at the Lucario and Zoroark pair.

Their faces burned as they exited the walls of the city and sat against the southern wall, sitting apart from each other. The plains sprawling in front of them rustled with the growing wind, enormous dark clouds looming in the distance. The trees to the east and west trembled with the gale, their bare branches whistling in seeming fear.

They sat quiet for a few moments. Lawrence shuffled his feet uneasily while Cassia combed through her mane nervously. Despite longing to see each other for so long, they were lost for words.

Lawrence broke the silence and said, “How’d you survive? How did you get here?” Cassia told her story, from when she woke up to when she defeated Gardner.

At the end, she shakenly said, “I never realized how…conflicted Arthus truly is. He literally has another mind controlling him, and it’s thanks to his own grief that he did all this.” She hugged herself, bowing her head. “I wish there was something I could do to help him.”

Lawrence leaned closer to her. “There…might still be a chance?”

“…Maybe” They smiled for a moment, the Cassia said, “So, how did you end up here?”

Lawrence explained what happened after he left the temple, from his grief, to his rediscovery, even Matheus’ feelings of him being a Legend.

“You went through my stuff?” exclaimed Cassia.

“I didn’t know you were alive!”

“That’s no excuse!”

“Actually—”

“Aw, forget it.” Cassia threw her hands down, laughing. “I’m excited that you’ve changed, Lawrence! I knew that you would make a great Arceist!”

Lawrence smirked, nudging her. “And you thought I was a Guild Pokémon trying to capture you.”

Cassia playfully slapped him and sternly said, “That was before I really knew you!”

Lawrence chuckled, leaning back on the wall. “Grom didn’t like me at all. Good thing I—” He stopped, noticing her glum face as she reached inside her bag.

She pulled out Grom’s bolts, closing her claws over them. “Managed to save these. They’re all…they’re all that’s left of him.”

Lawrence empathetically wrapped his arms around Cassia. “I miss him too, Cassia. I’m sorry I wasn’t more…considerate.”

Cassia put Grom’s bolts back into the bag. “It’s not your fault.”

They remained hugging each other, Grom’s death hanging heavy over them. The storm in the south rumbled closer, lightning arcing between the clouds in flashes of white light. Deep, roaring thunder followed, making the ground shake.

They parted from each other to look up. “I haven’t seen a storm like that since…ever,” Cassia explained.

“Same here.” Lawrence thought for a moment, looking away. “We should probably get back to Matheus.” Lawrence made as if to stand up.

Cassia helped him to his feet. “I saw him as we were going away; he was going to the south part of the city.” They walked together through the now-crowded streets, making way to the southern wall.

At the top of the southern wall, Matheus sat on a large brick, deep in thought. The citizens of Saunte had since begun gathering their belongings from the wreckage, their livelihoods ruined by the Guild—but their hearts were full, thanks to Cassia and Lawrence.

Lawrence and Cassia came up to him. Matheus turned around, grim. Lawrence said, “Matheus, the storm—”

“Is getting worse by the minute, I know.” He groaned and said, “As you said, that isn’t any ordinary storm. It heralds Yveltal’s flight across Serenita. Soon, he’ll take the life of every Pokémon here; nothing will stop him.”

Mortified, Cassia exclaimed, “There must be something we can do! There’s so many good and honest Pokémon living here! It wouldn’t be right for them to die!”

Matheus looked down at sighed, slapping his paws against his legs. “There’s only one way: The Prison Bottle. Hoopa was supposed to go retrieve it and complete his duty, but now that he’s entirely in the bottle, he can’t.” He rubbed his face and moaned.

Cassia perked up, then hurriedly reached inside her bag. “Wait, Matheus!” He turned to face her. She held up Hoopa’s prison with the cloth, it’s eyes continuing to shine fiercely.

Both Matheus and Lawrence staggered back in surprise. The Legend scrambled to his feet and pried the Bottle away from Cassia. “When in Equivos did you get this?” he exclaimed, holding his paw over the cap.

“I felt compelled to take it back when I was in the Guild, but I didn’t know why,” Cassia explained. “But I guess I know now.”

Matheus sighed in relief and smiled. “Thanks to you, many will live.” He started down the stairs of the wall, toward the gate of the city.

Lawrence and Cassia followed, with Lawrence rearing away from the bottle. “Are you sure this is a good plan?”

Matheus solemnly nodded. “It’s the only one we have.” They exited the city and stopped in the middle of the field.

Matheus held the cap of the Prison Bottle, and after a moment of hesitation, he held it high and pulled off the stopper. Thick violet mist spewed from it and swirled around the Legend, collecting in front of him and bellowing menacingly. The Unbound Hoopa materialized in front of them and threw his six arms out from their sockets, his eyes brightly glowing green.

“I have been robbed of my freedom by that deceitful Zoroark!” Hoopa roared, the air crackling around him. “I know well what my duties are, puny Lucario, and I refuse to comply until I have my freedom—and more!”

Lawrence pulled at Matheus’ free arm. “What are you doing?” he hissed. “How is he going to help us?”

Matheus set a finger against his lips, then turned back and proclaimed, “Hoopa, regardless of your personal issues, you must complete your duty of gathering all the followers of Arceus to the Tree of Life in preparation of Yveltal’s coming, as prophesied in the Arceist Tome.”

Hoopa grinned maliciously, leering at the Lucario. “And who’s going to make me? Arceus has no energy to spare to prepare for the final desolation, and the Seal is in that Zoroark’s claws.” He leaned back and crossed his six arms. “Until I am recompensed, I will not gather the followers of Arceus.”

Matheus quaked, dropping the Prison Bottle as the fur on the back of his head rose. “As a servant of Arceus, you will save them! I didn’t spend the last two thousand years saving lives just to lose them all because of your arrogance!”

Hoopa continued to grin. “My freedom, my price, or no saving grace. I shed no tears for the loss of life, as you know from my trial, Matheus.”

Matheus seethed, his eyes temporarily glowing blue. He soon calmed, his paws balled into fists. “I’ll grant you your freedom,” he growled, “but what’s your price?”

Hoopa balanced a loop on two fingers, purple mist flowing from their centers. “A simple one.” He stacked the loops together. "A heavy one.” He set them over his head. “All I ask is for one thing.” He lowered one hoop over his head, causing it to appear in the higher one, leaving an enormous space between his head and body. “One far more amusing than a mere parlor trick.”

He pulled back the loops and made his eyes parallel to Matheus’. “I want, from one of you, your most precious love.”

Matheus blinked. “What?”

Hoopa chucked, leaning back and crossing his hands behind his head. "You heard me: your most precious love. One of you come to me and offer it, and once I have it, I will gather the followers.” He straightened and sat on crossed legs, his arms reentering their crevices. “Once the storm clouds cover the entirety of Serenita, Yveltal shall come. I suggest you make your decision hastily.”

Matheus nodded dazedly, then returned to his companions. “You heard him. Unless we sacrifice our greatest love, all of Arceus’ work will be for nothing.”

Lawrence held Cassia’s hand. “If I go…I’d be giving up Cassia.” He shook his head. “I can’t lose her again.”

Cassia held a hand over her heart, touched. “And I’d lose Lawrence…”

Silence. None seemed to be willing to give their most precious love, even if the lives of the entire region were at stake. The storm clouds rolled overhead, migrating further and further north, and spreading still to the east and west.

Matheus suddenly grimaced, taking off his hat. “I’ll…I’ll do it.” He faced Hoopa. “It’s high time I did it anyway.” Without waiting for the word of his comrades, he boldly marched to Hoopa, and planted himself in front of the djinn.

Hoopa eyed Matheus, his grin growing wider. “Ah, the Guildmaster offers himself as tribute. What a delectable surprise.”

Matheus replaced his hat, holding his paws out. “Just do it.”

Hoopa chuckled, his claws glowing violet. “Your wish is my will…” He tapped Matheus’ chest, and he breathed in haggardly, holding a paw against his chest. Pure white light flowed from him into Hoopa’s finger, growing dimmer with each passing moment.

Matheus fell to his knees, his silver fur losing its luster with the light. His breathing became ragged, his limbs shook, becoming frailer each passing moment. Cassia went to support him, but Lawrence held her back, his eye narrowing as the light extinguished.

Hoopa retracted his finger, inspecting it. He scraped it against another claw, then gingerly picked up the Prison Bottle. “Now for the other half of our agreement.” His claws glowed violet, and the bottle shattered into millions of pieces, exploding outward.

Hoopa stood straight and took a deep breath, a warm glow surrounding him. “I will now complete my duty. Then, I shall join my fellow Legends in the final destruction of Equivos.” His six hoops flew from his arms, one going to the far east.

He pointed at Lawrence and the others. “Don’t let this be for naught. Complete your duty, Keeper.” A hoop swept over and scooped him inside. Another two hoops followed suit, capturing Lawrence and Cassia and sending them to Deitae.

Hoopa laughed, sending the hoops all across the world. “All thoughts and wills are known to the mighty Hoopa, my freedom allowing my full power. No unfaithful will arrive on Deitae.” His eyes glowed a brighter emerald.

“All on Serenita shall fall at the wings of Yveltal.”

~~~~

Cold.

Weak.

Foolish.

Me.

Matheus stirred, his vision clearing in the dim light. He saw a vague blue shape, accompanied by a black-and-red one. “Are you alright?” a muffled voice asked.

Matheus moaned, holding his chest. “Been…better,” he croaked. He struggled to his feet, clutching onto Lawrence and Cassia for support. He looked around him, recognizing where he was.

Dark, massive trees surrounded a large clearing, the grass underneath them completely black. The occasional yellow speck of light popped out from the ground, only for it to die soon after contacting the air. The wind was strong, and black clouds overhead boomed their arrival. To his right was an enormous, rainbow-colored tree, its bark pulsing many colors to the golden leaves. A single entrance lay embedded in its trunk, guarded by a familiar ‘X’.

Matheus made a grim, hoarse laugh. “It’s finally here…the Day of Desolation.”

“Matheus, what did Hoopa take from you? You look awful,” Cassia said, inspecting Matheus’ paw.

He gently pulled it away. “It was what I held most precious…once.” He coughed, then said, “We are in Xerneas’ Glade, where the Tree of Life grows.” He held his paw out grandly, noting the frail bones beneath. “Welcome to Deitae.”

All but Matheus gazed in awe at the marvelous tree, the many spiraling lights a sight to behold. “Isn’t this place lethal for non-Legends? You know, the glowing lights?” Cassia asked

Matheus pointed at a dying light sprouting from the soil. “With the Day of Desolation, the lights are no longer alive. You have nothing to fear here—provided that Arthus doesn’t reach the Tree of Life.” He coughed again, pounding his chest. “While he is certainly a danger, he is second to the real task at hand: bringing all the remaining Pokémon of Equivos to the Realm of the Keeper.”

“The final prophecy…” Cassia muttered.

Matheus nodded weakly. “Yes. Any moment now, Hoopa will bring them here.” He looked around, then sighed. “Although that will be meaningless unless the way to the realm opens. Once Yveltal finishes his work, the Legends will destroy Serenita, and then Deitae—and us along with it.” He rolled his head, seething. “I don’t even know who the Keeper is, let alone how the way opens.”

The Trevenant’s prophecy rang clear in Lawrence’s mind: “A Keeper once was, but now he becomes a treader of realms and deceiver of self. The truth once held must take once more in order for the Keeper to be awakened for war. Awaken Aleron as well as the Keeper and Equivos may be reborn to live on.”

Lawrence paused. “Cassia said a while back that I had to be the Keeper…”

Beep—Beep—Beep!

Everyone jumped in fright, searching wildly for the source of the alien sound.

Beep—Beep—Beep!

Matheus pointed at Lawrence. “It’s coming from you! What is that infernal noise?”

Lawrence’s heart skipped a beat. “It couldn’t be!” He scrambled to remove the Pokédex from his arm, then flipped open the case. A rush of excitement overcame him from the words on the screen:

Incoming Call from Valence HQ.

~~~~

On the southern coast of Serenita, near the islands of Cretea, the winds grew as the clouds advanced to the north. The seas rose and stirred to meet the gathering storm. No sea creatures fought against the tide, for all had gone, to the safety far beyond the borders of Equivos—where there may be none.

Arthus meditated above a dark circle of sand, gradually feeding the deposit beneath to keep it in existence. All while he did, he thought of those he had lost—first Corrina, then Matheus, Erik, even Cassia. All to the same, uncaring god: Arceus.

Arthus clutched the Seal, the pulsing light growing brighter with each passing moment. “Soon, Cassia…soon, we’ll be together again.” He swung his head to the left and seethed, “And you won’t be there to stop me. I’ll make sure of it!” He slammed his claws into the sand, and tendrils rose up to drag him into the earth. A beam of red light surged under the seas toward the continent of Deitae, all to complete the Usurper’s final desire.

As he coursed through the vast network of Life, the small, weak voice in the back of his mind thought of only one thing:

‘I have nothing to live for. Let me die so I don’t ruin the lives of everyone living and dead.”
 
Last edited:
*sees chapter title* I wonder if Cassia's gonna find Lawrence? :p

First off, I like the argument going on between Cassia and Gardner. He's trying to seem rather pragmatic in this situation and Cassia's insistence on going and teaching the Tome is pretty crazy on paper. I'm glad that he continues to remain skeptical even after Zacheus agrees to take them to Saunte. I'm not sure if you went back and revised this stuff based on my feedback earlier, but this feels more in line with Gardner's character. And when it seems like he's been completely outflanked he focuses on trying to snap Cassia out of this recurring issue of being afraid of who she is. It's... kind of strange that Cassia is this receptive to a pep talk from someone who was trying to kill her not long ago. Maybe add in a line where Cassia hearing Gardner speak out in favor of the Tome gives her a bit more confidence. It would help that mental battle she has a short while later.

The battle itself is well-written, I think. No real complaints to speak of other than it's a lot of space dedicated to these two battling a couple of mooks who we really haven't met and who I don't really care about. I'm not sure there's anything you need to cut, per se, it's just an observation. With that said, I don't blame the townsfolk for still being suspicious of Cassia. It's kind of hard to present a good picture when Arthus is the only other Zoroark in the world... at least, if I read things right. Maybe Cassia should mention something like that?

At the sound of his name, Lawrence sprinted forward and swept Cassia off her feet. They spun briefly as Lawrence hugged her tight, tears brimming his eyes.
Aaaaaaand I called it.

“You went through my stuff?” exclaimed Cassia.

“I didn’t know you were alive!”

“That’s no excuse!”
Yeah, that's right Cassia, you tell that little peeper what's what!

The reunion itself is kind of... a bit underwhelming. Just some goofy exchanges of words and a few tears. Though I suppose the current situation has something to do with it, so I don't think you have to change it. As for the ending parts... okay. Here I was thinking that Equivos was going to be preserved (it may still be), but it looks far more like we're heading for a Rapture-like scenario. I'm... a bit sketchy on that whole subject. As it stands right now, it looks like Lawrence's ultimate role may involve a portal back to Unova. Why do I get this feeling like he's actually going to be bringing all the good Pokémon through to Unova? It would make Cassia's comments about Unova some clever foreshadowing on your part. Guess I'll have to wait and see.
 
It's... kind of strange that Cassia is this receptive to a pep talk from someone who was trying to kill her not long ago. Maybe add in a line where Cassia hearing Gardner speak out in favor of the Tome gives her a bit more confidence. It would help that mental battle she has a short while later.

I agree. I'll add in such a line.

Yeah, that's right Cassia, you tell that little peeper what's what!

This was inspired by your comments, actually. Glad to see you enjoyed it.

The reunion itself is kind of... a bit underwhelming. Just some goofy exchanges of words and a few tears. Though I suppose the current situation has something to do with it, so I don't think you have to change it.

Yeah, there really isn't much time to have any sort of extended reunion, considering the circumstances.

As for the ending parts... okay. Here I was thinking that Equivos was going to be preserved (it may still be), but it looks far more like we're heading for a Rapture-like scenario. I'm... a bit sketchy on that whole subject. As it stands right now, it looks like Lawrence's ultimate role may involve a portal back to Unova. Why do I get this feeling like he's actually going to be bringing all the good Pokémon through to Unova? It would make Cassia's comments about Unova some clever foreshadowing on your part. Guess I'll have to wait and see.

I did some research on this Rapture subject, as I hadn't heard of it previously. I won't say anything else, though; I'll save that for the climax. ;)

Thanks for your review, and I'm glad to see that there isn't too much I need to change. That lends more time to actually writing Chapter 23. Life's been rather crazy lately, and it seems that Sundays have been the best days for me to write despite my preference not to. Hopefully I can finish up soon so I can focus on some other projects before I get to writing the prequels.

I say that in plural form because after some further thought, I've determined that Matheus and Arthus' backstory and the rewrite of Legends Unraveled are so different in tone, structure, and focus that I cannot justify having them in the same thread, similar to why I split Chapters 16 and 17 here. So, the first story I will write will the backstory, and as of now, it is known as PMD: The Edge of Despair. The name is still a work in progress, but if it sounds good to you, then I'll keep it.
 
As I'm sure many have noticed, I have yet to post Chapter 23 today. I'm sorry to say that the chapter is not ready for posting, due to me getting sidetracked with another project, and my family recently going on overdrive to get a garden going. Both have taken up my time to the point that I simply couldn't write the chapter. I'm sorry for not having it ready, especially after posting every other one consistently throughout these last few months.

Don't lose hope, however; I plan on finishing the initial writing tomorrow. I'll spend the rest of today working on that aforementioned project and preparing for this marathon write. I hope I can have the chapter posted by the end of tomorrow, but I'm not sure that will be possible. I still plan on posting Chapter 24 next week, so aim to see Chapter 23 before then. Again, sorry for the delay, and I hope you will stay with me for the climax.

EDIT: Forgot to mention, but I've made changes to some previous chapters! After receiving reviews and some of my own thought, I saw fit to make changes. Feel free to read them if you like while you're waiting for Chapter 23.
 
Last edited:
Chapter 26: Salvation
Chapter 26: Salvation

The Day has come,


The Flight has begun,

The Usurper has but hours,

To fulfill his mission.

The Priestess has spoken,

The Bottle has broken,

The Keeper has awoken,

The Day of Desolation.

~~~~

Hoopa cackled as he hovered high above Serenita, watching four of his hoops scooping up Pokémon through one in front of him. He carefully avoided the Pokémon unfaithful to Arceus, leaving dozens behind after finishing a village.

Abruptly, he clapped his hands together, and his hoops immediately returned to him. “It is done.”

“Krreeeaaaaww!”

Hoopa smirked, noticing that the storm clouds had fully covered the continent. “Just in time.” A Y-shaped object soared over him, rapidly upon Serenita. A deep, booming voice rang out across the land:

“The Day has come! All who failed to follow the words of the Creator shall be claimed by Yveltal!”

~~~~

“I-It’s a call from Unova!” Lawrence exclaimed, nearly dropping the Pokédex. He and Cassia and Matheus stood away from the growing crowd of Pokémon surrounding the Tree of Life.

“What do you mean ‘a call’?” Matheus asked, his voice growing stronger. The Pokédex continued to beep, waiting for Lawrence to accept the transmission.

Lawrence pointed at the Pokédex excitedly. “Look, this might sound crazy, but I have a way to get everyone out of Equivos!” He breathed in sharply. “The…the realm of the Keeper.” He fell still, suddenly realizing the Trevenant’s prophecy. “I’m a traveler between worlds…I’ve protected so many. I gathered everyone—and the Arcean Texts. Only one message remained from them: to treat Pokémon like ourselves.” He looked around him, everything coming clear to him. “Those words were never meant for the Pokémon of my world…they were meant for the Pokémon of this one!”

He stared at the Pokédex and quietly said, “I’m the Keeper. I was meant to come here.” He lifted his head and said more clearly, “I…I can bring everyone to safety—to my world.

“And how would you do that?” Cassia interjected.

“The same way I came here: a wormhole.” Lawrence remembered the horrifying experience of entering the region, the screeching of the beasts beyond the clouded tunnel, causing him to shiver.

“Kreeaaww!”

Everyone around the tree screamed, panicking at the shadow soaring above them and toward the continent.

Matheus pulled Lawrence closer. “Once Yveltal’s done with Serenita, the other Legends will destroy it and come here to finish the job! And that’s not even accounting for Arthus’ madness!” He stepped away and added, “Plus, there’s the matter of getting outside the region. How are you so sure that this ‘Valence’ will take us out of here?”

“I’m contacting them now.” Lawrence tapped the answer button, and the text on the screen dimmed.

Cassia cocked her head. “What now?”

“Now we wait,” Lawrence replied. He turned to the other Pokémon. “We need to get them ready to leave. It won’t be long before they come in.”

“We haven’t seen any sign of Arthus; someone has to go to the coast and stop him from reaching the Tree of Life,” Matheus reminded them.

“Is Arceus really in there?” Cassia asked, awestruck.

“Yes, but the protections he put up are useless against the Seal; it can counteract anything created by the Legends.” Matheus separated himself from them, stepping to the west. “I’ll handle him while you two help distribute supplies. They’re in a storage compartment under the Tree.”

“What?” Cassia grabbed Matheus’ arm and pulled him toward her, adjusting the Tome in her grip. “You’re too weak! You can’t—”

“Just hit me with Life and I’ll be fine.”

“But you’re a Legend! He can take you!”

“Not anymore.”

“All the more reason!

“I’ve beat him before.”

I don’t want you to die!”

Cassia let go of Matheus and threw down her arms. “We need you. We all do. If we’re really going to Lawrence’s world, we need someone to look up to, someone we respect.” She held the Arceist Tome out to him. “We need Aleron. Not Matheus.”

Lawrence’s Pokédex continued to ring as Matheus gazed at the Tome. Lightning flashed, and rain pelted the ground.

The Legend turned away from Cassia. “No. Matheus would run from this fight. Just like he did when Arthus first took power. He would be a coward, hiding away, regretting his actions.” He closed his eyes. “Aleron would protect those who cannot protect themselves. He would charge in recklessly, beating back whatever dangers awaited him, no matter the cost.” He pushed the Tome back to Cassia. “You are a better example than I could ever be. You lead them.” He let go of it. “I’ll save them.”

Cassia held the Tome close to her chest, then nodded. Matheus went to turn back but was stopped by Cassia’s hand again. She set it on Matheus’ palm. “I’ll give you what I can spare.” Life surged from Cassia’s arm into Matheus’ causing him to stand taller and breathe clearer. His coat retained the dull sheen gained from Hoopa’s price.

Matheus raised his paw, warmed by the rush of energy. “Thanks.” He turned and ran into the dark woods, leaving Cassia to her work.

She caressed the Tome, walking back to Lawrence. “Do you think he’ll be alright?”

Lawrence looked away from the Pokédex. “He knows Arthus best. If anyone’s got a chance to stop him, it’s Matheus.” He turned back to the Pokédex, gripping it tighter. “I just hope we can do our part.”

Cassia cocked her head, looking over Lawrence’s shoulder. “Why?” The Pokédex continued to flash, waiting for someone to pick up on the other end.

“No one’s answering.”

~~~~

Unova, Castelia City, Valence Tech

In the dark hallways of Facility D, scientists solemnly pulled white sheets over the various instruments of the dimensional research center. Others gathered what data they had on Equivos, and others more worked on dismantling the wormhole generator, its golden ring gathering dust. Machines scraped and ground in the background, muffling the pitiful whines of the Pokémon in cages throughout.

Aaron Hanson bit his fist, his head low and eyes shut. “He was so promising…” he sighed. He glanced at the communication module, a single red light blinking below the slim microphone and blank screen.

Two engineers inspected the module. “That Lawrence fella’s been gone for nearly a month,” one said.

“Likely dead by now,” the other replied.

“And we’ve been sending a signal ever since he got sucked in.”

“Must not’ve been in range before he died.”

Hanson grimaced. “Yes, and I’ll have to break the news to his friends and family. I’ll have to explain that he died in a lab accident, but no need to go into the details.” He groaned. “I can’t afford to discredit the company any more than I need to.”

The engineers set to work on disassembling the giant communication module, going behind the contraption. The red light suddenly glowed green.

Hanson sighed, massaging his forehead. “Years of preparation…a perfect employee…and weeks of putting off the board…” He tightened his fist. “Wasted.” He looked to the ceiling, shaking his head slightly. “I had such high hopes…a world full of talking Pokémon…” He sighed and lowered his head. “I suppose it was never meant to be.”

As the communication hub began to be taken down, Hanson took another hopeless glance over at the module. His eyes widened. He ran to the module and shouted, “Stop! Stop! We have contact!”

The engineers stopped in their tracks and backed away, looking around the front. One pushed back his helmet and blew his breath out slowly. “Well I’ll be. He’s alive!”

He pushed him away and hunched over the computer. “Tell everyone to stop what they’re doing! Lawrence has responded!”

The engineers nodded and ran through the dark hallways, shouting for everyone to stop. All around, the scientists halted taking down the equipment, even the enormous wormhole generator.

Hanson pushed a button on the module, allowing a cacophony of static to ensue. He stepped back and cringed, waving over to his men. “Get this thing to work!” A pair came to him and hurriedly twisted dials and clicked buttons, clearing the static and making voice come clear.

Finally, in a crackling tone he said, “This is Lawrence Stephenson—Repeat—Lawrence Stephenson—Can you hear me?”

Hanson pushed away the scientist and hovered in front of the microphone. “We hear you loud and clear, Lawrence!” Hanson wiped his brow, grinning. “Thank heavens you’re alive! You dropped off the grid after you disappeared, and we’ve been sending a distress signal ever since!” He looked behind him, his grin fading. “We were just about to take everything down, in fact.” He turned back around. “What happened to you?” He tapped the blank screen behind the microphone. “Did your camera break in the entry? Why can't we see you?”

A short breath blew through the crackling speaker. “Not a good time—have to hurry! World’s falling apart—need wormhole!”

Hanson shook his head in bewilderment. “What do you mean the world’s falling apart? It was a stable dimension—”

“There’s thousands of Pokémon in danger! How quick—wormhole?” Lawrence’s voice kept breaking, losing itself to the static.

Hanson pulled a scientist closer. “If what he says is true, we don’t have time to waste! Get the wormhole generator running and target his current location!” He turned back to the monitor. “How many Pokémon are there with you?”

“Thousands—hurry!”

As the wormhole generator hastily had final adjustments made, Hanson smiled. “This venture wasn’t a total loss after all.” He paced to one of the blue-suited guards standing by, several Pokeballs at his hip. He leaned down as Hanson said, “Get the cages ready. We’re about to have a lot of Pokémon come from Equivos.”

~~~~

Amidst the thundering of the storm, a portion of the coastline emanated red light. Soaking sand erupted into the air, and Arthus was thrown out from the ground. Sand coated his fur as he took deep, desperate breaths. He wearily came to his feet and studied the turmoil around him. He faced the Tree of Life and grinned, then knelt down and held his hand under the sand. He absorbed the rich well of Life the Tree had gathered, so much that he felt fit to burst.

He stood straight and looked up at the Tree once more. “Soon, this will all be over.”

“Yes, it all will.”

Arthus spun around and froze. Matheus leaned against a tree, his arms folded, and his head lowered. The Tree of Life rose behind him, the lights continuing to shine as a beacon to those beneath it.

The Zoroark narrowed his eyes and sneered. “Here to stop me again, are you?” He slowly approached the silver Lucario. “For the third time. First you betrayed me, then you took Erik, then you took Cassia!”

“That was never my fault, Arthus. Just as you drove me away with your change, you drove away Erik and Cassia.” Matheus stood up, straightening his hat. “You’re blind to what you’ve become. You’re a murderous mad-Pokémon, not even flinching at the prospect of slaying someone for dropping your food, when you used to be someone who would forgive even the most wretched criminal!” Matheus bared his teeth. “You became the evil that you wanted to stop!”

“Enough!” Arthus bellowed, his eyes glowing red. He stopped then closed his eyes, taking slow, deliberate breaths. After a moment, he uncovered his eyes, pure, ice-like blue. “If you think that I enjoy this terror…then you’re wrong. I hate it as much as I did in the past.” He stooped forward, extending his arms. “But unlike before, I know that this needs to happen for the world to be saved from itself. When I take Arceus, all will be resurrected; it won’t matter if I kill them now because they’ll die anyway!”

“At what cost? With no choice but the right one, they won’t be alive!”

Arthus’ claws emanated Life. “This entire discussion is water under the bridge. We’ve had it twice before, and both times we clashed.” The Seal glowed brighter as he removed it from his neck and wrapped the chain around his claw. “It’s time I took you with the Seal!” He sprung toward Matheus, the Seal outstretched.

Matheus leapt back and threw down his fists. They surged with Aura as he pressed them together, causing the light to gather inside. Arthus came to his feet and sprinted after Matheus. The Lucario threw an Aura Sphere toward him.

Arthus’ claws glowed crimson as he beat the sphere away, causing it to explode with violet light against a tree. He snarled, both his hands glowing with Life. He held them outward, continuing to run for Matheus.

The Lucario pressed his paws together once more, then slowly spread them out, creating an elongated rod of Aura. He thrust it outward and met with Arthus’ claws, creating sparks of purple as they ground against its surface.

Arthus pressed close, the Seal growing closer to Matheus’ paws on the rod. “Only a matter of time before we all die, isn’t it?”

Matheus pulled away and pounded Arthus in the chest, causing him to stumble back. Arthus growled and beat against the rod, sending out another explosion of violet. He did so again, and again, approaching Matheus from all different angles in an attempt to graze him with the Seal of Creation.

He halted, breathing heavily. He grinned, and various copies spread from him and surrounded Matheus. They reared back to strike.

Matheus dove to the ground, his rod dissipating. He closed his eyes and saw vague outlines surrounding the copies, noticing only one true Zoroark as a blob of red. He swept Arthus’ legs and rolled underneath the falling Zoroark, then darted into a dense cluster of trees.

Arthus clambered to his feet and snorted, the Seal still in his grip. “You can’t avoid your fate!” He rushed for Matheus, slashing at trees, still reaching out to touch his fur.

Behind them, soaring over Serenita, Yveltal roared.

~~~~

Within the Guild, Pokémon forced themselves through the torrential rains and thundering lightning, taking shelter in the storehouses and barracks. Some dared to go out to secure the unprotected rations and supplies, but most felt a deep foreboding, as if, somehow, this storm was an ending.

Within the Master’s Tower, rain leaked through the rafters and splattered over Martre’s head, rolling down his face and coating his bandaged eyes. He prodded them, sensing his surroundings with his psychic abilities rather than using his physical.

He faced the window, his metallic teeth grinding. “Curse that traitorous Zoroark.” He looked up, as if seeing the raindrops rocketing to the ground. “Unlike any I’ve seen before…”

A void-like shadow passed his psychic vision, causing him to flinch. He shook his head, disbelieving it. “Tales were all they were…legends…”

Screams echoed from below, and Martre looked out to see a crowd of his subservient Pokémon escaping from a giant column of crimson energy spiraling into the sky. It rapidly enveloped the Pokémon and absorbed them, burning through the structures and leaving only destruction in its wake.

The column circled closer to the Metagross catching each of its victims. Martre cleared his mind as his research center shone with red light, the pillar just beyond the window.

It crashed through the glass and burned the wood instantly, melting stone and disintegrating the books in its path. It surged toward Martre and caught him in its light, bringing the Life of the Metagross to Yveltal, the Destruction Legend.

~~~~

The rain on Deitae only worsened. The trees of the Luminescent Woods blew backward in the mist. The Lake of Enlightenment lost its luster in the fierce winds. The ruins of the Mountain of Rebirth crumbled further in the onslaught. All the landmarks of the Legends wore away as Yveltal completed his first and final work.

Lawrence distributed small packs of supplies to the displaced Pokémon of Serenita underneath the Tree of Life, the multi-colored leaves continuing to shine bright despite the storm. Lawrence distributed the supply bags from the shed while Cassia lined them up, preparing for the wormhole. Just as with the Guild, the end lingered in their minds.

Inside the supply storage, Lawrence continued to dwell on the preparation for the wormhole, how everything seemed to come together despite the circumstances. He looked up at the Tree of Life, wondering if some higher power was at work.

“Don’t even think about it.”

Lawrence turned around and saw Aerav Aerodactyl from Jareth standing outside the door, his wings bent on the ground with age. “Arceus is the wisest and most powerful being in Equivos. He has a purpose for everything he does.” He gave the Lucario a warning look. “So don’t go to him. We are not worthy to stand in his presence.”

Lawrence nodded, picking up the final bag and strapping it onto his back. “Don’t you think it’s strange that I happen to come just as the world is ending? That I have the only way to save everyone? That Cassia—”

“None of that is important now.” Aerav smiled slightly. “Just focus on bringing us to your place of safety.” He lumbered back to the Pokémon of his village, leaving Lawrence to dwell further on the circumstances of their return.

He stepped out of the now-empty storage underneath the tree and closed the door, looking up the boughs one more time. “I’ll figure out why you did this. One way or another.” He turned toward the eastern edge of the woods. “I hope you’re alright, Matheus.”

“Lawrence!”

Lawrence turned around to see Cassia coming toward him, sopping wet from the rain. Cassia pointed at the end of the line of Pokémon. “We’ve organized everyone and got them ready. Where’s the wormhole?”

Lawrence glanced at the Pokédex on his arm. “I haven’t been able to contact Valence since the connection gave out. We’ll just have to hope they do it.”

Cassia squinted her eyes, looking up. “Better make it quick. It looks like Yveltal is finished.”

The Legend flew over their heads in a rush of wind, causing many of the other Pokémon to jump or scream. Yveltal seemed to disappear into the sky, vanishing into the distance.

From the southern edge of the trees, a giant Trevenant rose above their boughs. A hoard of Phantump followed in his wake, surrounding his body and swarming for his precious Life. On the side of his head, a cluster of Buneary huddled inside a small house, fearfully staring out into the rain. As he approached, the remaining population of Serenita steadily backed away, unsure of the ghost.

The Trevenant marched toward Lawrence and Cassia, his arms lowered and scraping against the soil. “The day has come. Yveltal has flown, and soon, his fellow Legends will follow in his wake.” He lifted his hand and placed it against the edge of the hut. The three Buneary cautiously climbed out, covering their heads from the rain. The Trevenant placed his other hand over them as he lowered them to the ground.

His maw curled into a smile. “I have cared for you as long as I am able.” His Phantump drifted away from him and swarmed over the three Buneary, creating cover from the rains.

The Buneary backed away, the smallest one sniffing. “Do you have to go?”

The Trevenant blinked, nodding his head. “The Realm of the Keeper is not for the likes of me. I am to remain and receive my rest.” He turned to Lawrence and Cassia. “My word has come true. The betrayal was fostered, the bottle was opened. Aleron has awoken, and now the Keeper has come to complete Arceus’ work.” His claws hovered over the ground, rising higher. “Now, Keeper, ensure that he did not save his Pokémon only for them to become slaves.” His hands sunk into the ground, and the cracks in the bark glowed red. His leaves fell away, and his head disintegrated, funneling into the grass. The rest of his body followed, removing any remnant of the Trevenant.

The entire crowd stood still, astonished by the arrival and the death of the seer. The Phantump mewled mournfully, their erratic nature slowed by the passing of their parent. The Buneary hugged each other in their loss of their second caretaker.

From the edge of the line of Pokémon, a certain Ambipom stepped out, holding a slumbering Aipom in his tails. “Alright, what in Arceus’ name is goin’ on! First, I get dragged away from my wife and get stuck with the kid, then some thing comes out and scares the livin’ daylights outta us, and now some giant tree comes and goes!” No reply came.

Lawrence’s Pokédex rung again, blaring out despite the rain. Lawrence hurriedly picked it up and answered, “Do you have it ready?”

“Yes—get to a good—position! Send—the word!”

Lawrence briefly glanced at Cassia, nodding his head. He ran to the front of the line of Pokémon, his steps heavier due to his soaking wet fur. The population gazed at him in awe, never having seen a Lucario after Arthus’ takeover of the continent.

He planted himself at the edge of the clearing and held the Pokédex in front of his face. “Now!”

The rain stopped over his head. The clouds swirled, funneling toward the Lucario and arcing with electricity. Lawrence moved away from its targeted ground and watched the funnel expand into a disc of roiling cloud. It stopped, then the center sunk inward, disappearing into a void. The back remained flat as the inside of the vortex spun once more, opening into a dark and forbidding abyss, revealing nothing of what lay beyond.

Lawrence studied the wormhole, remembering his first encounter well. Unlike before, it didn’t pull everything toward it, but instead remained stagnant in the air, patiently waiting. Despite this, Lawrence could feel its antagonistic aura.

The Pokédex crackled and said, “We’ve refined the generator and made it so you could enter at will. You best hurry and get everyone across; I can’t guarantee it will last long!”

Lawrence shook his head and turned to the Equivosians. He pointed to the wormhole and exclaimed, “Go inside, now! This is your only way to safety!” They shifted uneasily, gazing at the wormhole in fear.

R-R-R-UMBLE!

All around them, towering giants sprung from the singular mountains and lakes that formed Deitae. Groudon burst from the enormous Crack of Formation, spreading magma through the air and shaking the earth. Kyogre emerged from the Abyss of Darkness, sending a fountain of salt water to mix with the rain and strengthening the already-mighty torrents. The oceans rose and fell, rising beyond the coastlines and threatening to drown the vast tracts of land. Dialga and Palkia materialized from the Ruins of the Cosmos, joined with Azelf, Uxie and Mesprit from the Lake of Enlightenment. Time and space warped all around them, their presence disturbing the work they had so carefully made. The Legendary beasts—Entei, Raikou, and Suicune—roared from the Trinity Peaks, sending the call for their final work.

All the Legends that assisted in the creation of Equivos came from their domains, each calling out their final duty:

“Yveltal has finished what must be done, and now our time to destroy has come! All of Serenita now must fall, and then our home, Deitae, shall join it all!”

Simultaneously, the Legends marched from their abodes going around the Tree of Life and the one Legend that failed to emerge: Arceus, the creator of all. The entire pantheon prepared to destroy their greatest creation, wiped clean of life by the Destruction Pokémon.

Immediately after their call, the line of Equivosians advanced toward the wormhole, guided by their elders. Many voices cried out to escape:

“We can’t stay here! Let me in!”

“Why would Arceus do such a thing?”

“Listen to the Lucario, go through that thing!”

Cassia hastily joined Lawrence at the foot of the wormhole, blocking it from the onslaught of Pokémon. Lawrence held out his arms and exclaimed, “One at a time!” The Pokemon stopped, looking over Lawrence’s shoulder uneasily.

Once they fell still, Lawrence stepped away from the portal and gestured to it. “I don’t know what will happen if more than one goes through, so just…keep it reasonable.” He retracted his arm. “And be quick. The Legends will be back soon.”

The Linoone at the front of the line hurriedly jumped in, a squeak of fear emerging as he disappeared into the void. His family followed, and the others as well, as they warily entered the wormhole.

Lawrence stood at their side, his thoughts focused on only one thing. He stood straight and said, “I have to go help Matheus.”

“What?” Cassia exclaimed. “But he’s—”

“Probably in trouble with Arthus!” He jumped across the line of Pokémon and held Cassia’s hands. “Look, I know we don’t have much time, but we can’t leave Matheus here.” He held her hands tighter. “He’s…he’s our friend.”

They stared at each other for a few moments, with Cassia considering his words. She finally pulled away and sighed. “You’re right. I don’t want to leave him either.” She turned back on him and pointed a claw at his face. “But I don’t want to lose you either! You need to come back before those Legends do!”

Lawrence smiled, nodding his head. “I will.” He then nodded toward the wormhole. “Just make sure everyone gets across.” He turned around and ran into the forest toward Matheus and the desolation of the Legends.

Cassia remained behind, but inwardly, she fought between going with him and maintaining her position. ‘I can save him…I can save Arthus.’ Reluctantly, she turned away toward the fleeing Pokemon of Equivos. ‘But I must make sure they are all safe.’ She bowed her head and held her claws together. ‘Oh Arceus…save Lawrence…save Matheus.’ She opened her eyes.

‘Save my father.’

~~~~

Hanson and the other scientists stood behind the control panel, anxiously waiting for something to come through their wormhole. The generator hummed, growing in intensity as time wore on.

The CEO of Valence Tech waved to the men clad in black security vests. “Keep ready for the Pokémon. There’s no telling how they’ll react here. Just get them into the cages as soon as you can.” They each nodded to him, holding Pokeballs in their hands.

A scream emanated from the wormhole, and a Linoone shot out from it, skidding against the concrete floor. He opened his eyes and gasped, shrinking back down. “T-This isn’t how imagined it to look like.”

Hanson grinned, pushing back his ruffled hair. “Jackpot.” He swung his arm toward the Linoone. “You know the drill.”

A guard threw a Poke Ball in front of the Linoone. It cracked open and sent a flurry of white light in front of him, forming and dimming into a snarling Mightyena, barking at the Linoone.

The Linoone backed away, lowering his head and shivering. “W-Wild Pokémon!” He looked around at the foreign humans, paralyzed. “What are all of you?”

“Keep quiet!” the guard exclaimed. He pointed at the Linoone and shouted, “Mightyena, get the Linoone!”

The wolf growled and ran after it, its eyes wild. The Linoone screamed and swiftly ran away, darting around the legs of the guards toward a dark corner of the room. At the wall, he found himself surrounded with bars, unknowingly running into a cage.

The Mightyena hovered at the entrance, barking at the Linoone. He remained in the corner, clamping his paws over his head. “Arceus, save me!”

His family followed, each screaming as they sprawled to the ground. A cluster of Machoke followed, and many others as well. The other guards deployed their Pokémon, ranging from Luxray to Machamp, Arcanine to Pangoro—all powerful Pokémon, trained to capture.

Hanson couldn’t stop a smile from spreading across his face. “Project Babel is underway.”

The generator zapped, and the wormhole warped, disrupting the funnel inside. Hanson’s smile disappeared as quickly as it came. He jabbed a finger at a scientist. “Keep it stable! We must let Lawrence and all the other Pokémon through!” The scientist plinked away at a keyboard, shouting orders to his associates. The wormhole soon calmed, allowing more Pokémon to follow those who were herded away.

Sweat rolled down Hanson’s brow as he clamped his fingers on the railing. “Come on…bring more, Lawrence…bring more!”

~~~~

Across the ocean, the Kaena Woods burned by Reshiram’s almighty flames as he soared over the atmosphere. The Iren Desert turned to glass by Moltres’ fury, the Faylen Jungle froze by Articuno’s and Kyurem’s frost, and Mount Furnek raged under Entei’s roar. The islands of Cretea sunk into the ocean at Kyogre’s bidding, and the Minute Plains fractured under Groudon’s might. All around the physicality of Equivos, Dialga unraveled the stream of time, forcing the environments into a flux of birth and death, while Palkia warped matter from under to above and vice versa, ripping to pieces the vital balance of space. Yveltal’s oblivion provided peace to those who had inhabited the continent, saving them from the despair of the destruction of their home—all to cleanse the countless generations of darkness and evil caused by those who refused to serve Arceus.

On Deitae, Lawrence ran through the Luminescent Woods, leaping over fallen trees and heading for the explosions of crimson and azure in the distance.

Arthus struck against Matheus’ aura rod, driving him to the ground. “You. Will. Die!” He charged his claws with Life and struck against the rod once more, forcing it disintegrate in an explosion of violet.

Matheus’ was blown back, the soil churning behind his paws. Arthus ran forward and roared, swinging the Seal toward him once more. Matheus struck the Zoroark’s arm and punched him in the stomach, causing him to double over and breathe heavily.

Matheus cautiously stepped away, keeping his arms up. “Not as long as the Tree stands.”

Arthus suddenly sprung forward and slashed Matheus’ thigh. He screamed and fell to one knee, clutching the bleeding leg. Arthus stood and kicked him to the ground, a wide grin plastered across his face.

Matheus panted on the ground, struggling to get up. Arthus set his foot on his chest, dangling the Seal over him. He grinned. “Time’s up, Guildmaster.”

“No!”

Arthus’ head shot up as Lawrence ran from the edge toward him, aura flowing from his paws. He snapped up the Seal and turned back to Matheus. “I’ll finish you, then I’ll finish that human!” He slammed the Seal against Matheus’ chest.

Lawrence stopped, thinking he was too late. The Seal glowed against Matheus’ dull fur, edging against his spike. The rains continued to pelt them, weighing down their bodies.

Arthus blinked. Matheus remained present, a smile creeping across his lips. Arthus lifted the Seal and stared at it, then pressed it against Matheus again. No reaction.

Arthus growled, lifting the Seal once more. “How! It’s exactly how it was before!”

Matheus chuckled, his eyes glowing blue. “It only works on Legends.” His paws glowed blue, and he grabbed the Seal and came to his feet, favoring his uninjured limb. “And I’m not a Legend.” He reared back his paw, surrounding it with Aura.

Arthus hurriedly slashed Matheus’ paw on the Seal, causing him to release it and allow him to leap away and wrap the Seal around his hand.

As Matheus clutched his paw, Lawrence ran to him, asking, “Are you alright?”

Matheus lowered his paw, ignoring the scratch. “F-Fine.”

Arthus lowered the Seal around his neck and scowled. “You’ve just been wasting my time, knowing that I couldn’t take you with the Seal.”

“And it’s nearly too late,” Matheus replied. He grabbed Lawrence’s arm. “For all of us. You need to get out of here!”

Lawrence pulled away grabbing Matheus’ arm. “Not without you!”

“I’m old, weak, and foolish! You don’t need me!”

“Yes, I do! Who else will—”

They both stopped as Arthus ran around them and toward the clearing, the Seal illuminating the path.

Matheus pulled away from Lawrence and chased Arthus, his injured leg severely slowing his gait. “We can’t let him get to Arceus!”

“I’ll stop him!” Lawrence exclaimed, swiftly running ahead of his elder. Matheus’ cry was drowned out by a sudden boom of thunder as Zekrom unleashed his power on the Xilo Mountains, instantly reducing them to rubble.

Lawrence quickly caught up to Arthus and gathered a sphere in his paws far slower than Matheus’. The Zoroark looked back and snarled, charging a Life Sphere in his hand. He threw it back at Lawrence.

The Lucario dodged away from it, then narrowly avoided a tree. He threw the Aura Sphere at Arthus, clipping the Arthus’ legs.

Arthus gasped and tumbled to the ground, coating himself with mud and grass. He clambered to his feet and began to walk away, the clearing edging closer and closer into his vision.

Lawrence punched Arthus over the head and knocked him down. “You won’t take Arceus!”

Arthus throatily cackled, turning around. “Oh, I remember your dreams well, when I cared. You were a faithless young fool, wondering why Arceus would allow such horrible things to happen in the world.” He gestured around him at the rain, destruction, and waste. “And look what’s happened! Terrible, horrible death, more than I could ever achieve!” He held up the Seal. “And all of it could be stopped with this. No more faith, no more hopes, just a pure and simple trust that all will be well!”

Lawrence remembered his previous beliefs, that Arceus didn’t exist, that he was contradictory, that he never wanted the best for everyone. “You’re wrong! You’re looking only at the bad, Arthus, at what everyone else has done wrong!” He pointed at the storm. “He saved everyone that held faith in him! He prepared my world for them to come! Horrible things happen, but they aren’t because of him!” He jabbed a finger at Arthus. “It’s all because of Pokémon like you, who are too self-absorbed to care about anyone else!”

“I’ve had it with you!” Arthus bellowed, slashing at Lawrence. The Lucario stepped back at each subsequent slash. “You’re ignorant!” He charged his claws and skimmed against a tree. “Flawed!” He slammed the ground. “And deceitful!” Lawrence backed away with each blow, struggling to find an opening against the maddened Zoroark.

Arthus swept Lawrence’s legs and pinned the Lucario’s arms to the ground. “It’s thanks to you that Cassia died!” He raised a claw, aiming it at Lawrence’s heart.

“Father!”

Arthus stopped inches away from the killing blow. His head snapped up to see Cassia standing at the fringe of the woods and the clearing, her drenched fur billowing in the growing gale.

He stood straight, allowing Lawrence to scramble back to his feet and to Cassia. Arthus took a single step forward. “You’re alive…I thought you died…when you travelled through the Life.”

Thunder boomed across the sky. Cassia lowered her gaze and said, “Let me talk to my father. Now.”

Lawrence leaned close and hissed, “What are you doing? He nearly killed me!”

Arthus’ head jerked to the left, then to the right. He seethed and pulled at his mane. “No, no, no! You’re ruining everything!” He jerked back to the left. “Cassia! I’m here!”

Cassia held on to Arthus’ hands. “Fight him! Fight the shadow! Come back!”

Lawrence stepped back, horrified. “What is wrong with him?”

Arthus’ head snapped to the right, then he grabbed Cassia’s hands and bellowed, “What have you done?” He snapped to the left and pushed her away, falling to the ground. “It’s too late for me! You have to go, now!”

Cassia returned to him and tried to help him back to his feet. “No! It’s not too late! You can still come back!”

Arthus snapped back to the left and snarled, then clawed Cassia’s arm. She grunted and backed away, holding the injured limb.

Lawrence pulled her away and held her close. “What is he doing?”

Arthus spasmed a moment longer, then fell still. Cassia wheezed a sigh of relief. “Arthus—the real Arthus—is coming back.”

Lawrence dwelled on this, but soon looked back to the clearing. “Has everyone made it out?”

“Yes, everyone. I was going to run out to you and—” Her eyes widened. She held onto Lawrence’s arm. “Where’s Matheus?”

Arthus gasped and sat upright, his eyes closed as he breathed. Cassia broke away from Lawrence and sat next to him. Lawrence reluctantly followed as Arthus held his head.

Cassia sat close and said, “Dad…are you alright?”

He sat still. The rains pelted their fur. The Legends marched closer. The ground shook.

Arthus slowly opened his eyes. “Yes…” They opened wide, revealing their cold, malevolent nature. He pushed Cassia and Lawrence away and stood straight. “He’s dead!” He reared on Cassia and snarled, “That weak, idiotic fool won’t stop me anymore!

Cassia grabbed onto his arm and cried, “No! No, he isn’t gone! He can’t be!”

Lawrence came to his feet and surged Aura into his paws. Arthus whirled around and threw Cassia into Lawrence, sending them both sprawling. He faced the Tree of Life and crouched for one final sprint.

“Arthus!”

A silver blur bashed into Arthus and rolled across the ground, binding him with his limbs. Matheus bound him with his body, each rendered immobile by the other. The Seal lay buried between them, wrapped around Arthus’ neck and hidden behind his back.

Matheus grunted and growled as he fought against Arthus, his muscles tight and strained. “Go! I’ll keep him down!”

Lawrence and Cassia came to their feet, distressed. “We’re not leaving without you!” Lawrence cried. Cassia stood in shock at what Arthus had become.

Krreeeaaaaww!

At the triumphant cry, a rush of wind flowed from the east. They all now knew that the Legends had finished their work, and now were turning back to Deitae to complete the Day of Desolation.

Arthus gnashed his teeth, attempting to bite Matheus’ paws. “Let me go! I can stop this! All of it! I can save everyone!”

“Lawrence has already done that!” Matheus spat. He glared at the younger Lucario and Zoroark. “The Legends will be here in moments. You have to leave, now!”

Despite the logic of Matheus’ command, Lawrence shook his head, tears brimming his eyes. “We can’t leave you to die.”

“Father…” Cassia whimpered, staring at the savage face of Arthus’ shadow.

Matheus narrowed his eyes, all anger gone from them. “I want to die. I want to see Laryon and the rest of my family again.’ He rolled his head back over Arthus’, restraining his neck. “And I want to make up for the biggest mistake I ever made.” He looked back at Lawrence. “Go…take care of Cassia and everyone else. They’ll need you in your world. They don’t need me.”

Lawrence cringed, squeezing his eyes shut. He briefly nodded, then ran around the former Legend and took Cassia with him, leaving him to restrain Arthus despite the coming death. She reached back toward them and screamed, “Father!”

Fissures opened around Lawrence’s feet, Groudon’s fury encroaching the continent early. Trees fell all around him as he desperately charged toward the clearing, narrowly outrunning the desolation. He never faltered despite his vision blurred by rain and tears, all the way to the Tree of Life.

At the edge, the wormhole warped and tore the air around it, growing more unstable with each passing moment. The wind and rain blinded Lawrence as he charged toward it, the warping, twisted light his only guide. Cassia looked up at the sky gasped, noticing the great dragons of Equivos swarming across the sky and gathering light into their maws.

Lawrence dragged Cassia with him to the portal, the ground breaking underneath them. The wormhole cracked with yellow light, splintering under the dimensional energies. It glowed bright white and squealed, the funnel swirling too fast to see.

The dragons sent their attacks down on the continent, sending a wave of fire and immolation into the air. It blew Cassia into Lawrence, sending both of them into the exploding wormhole, winking out of the decimated world.

~~~~

The dragons flew overhead, and Arthus’ struggle to come free became more desperate and frantic. “It’s not too late. It’s not too late!”

Matheus panted haggardly, tiring from Arthus’ struggle. “It is, Arthus. You failed.”

“No!” Arthus shifted and faced Matheus, eyes wide with panic. “I can’t go! I can’t! I must save everyone!” His voice became a whisper as he suddenly stopped. “I…I just want my family back.”

The fire descended upon the continent and Matheus gazed into Arthus’ eyes, smiling. “And you will.” He closed his eyes, and the orange wave of pure energy enveloped them, becoming a bright white as they turned to nothingness—just as the rest of Equivos.

~~~~

Light.

Pure light.

All that could be seen was pure light.

Standing in the brightness, Lawrence struggled to see, turning about. “Cassia?”

“Lawrence?”

Lawrence turned to the source of her voice and saw her dark fur. He shuffled forward, unsure of whatever lay on the ground.

They finally met, their hearts racing from their escape. They held each other warily, unsure of their environment. “Where are we?” Cassia asked.

Lawrence cautiously looked around. “I…don’t know. I’ve never seen any place like this.”

They remained quiet for a moment. Cassia lowered her head. “Matheus…Arthus…they’re…they’re gone.”

Lawrence swallowed, his throat tightening. He made a shuddering sigh, lowering his head. “I…I wanted to save them…but…but Matheus”

Cassia set a hand against his face, forcing a smile. “It—it was his choice.” A tear rolled down her cheek. “He was always reckless…and Arthus.” She fell into Lawrence’s shoulder and sobbed. Together, they mourned for the loss of their dear friend, and Cassia’s lost ancestor, in the vast emptiness of white.

“Do not sorrow, my children.”

They both looked up and turned to witness a marvelous sight. A magnificent Pokémon with pure white fur and golden appendages towered over them, looking down with gentle, scarlet eyes. Green gems sparkled on the arc around his chest, and his hooves hovered with splendid grace, their tips just above the floor.

Cassia and Lawrence struggled for the word, but each managed to say it: “Arceus.”

Arceus made no motion, his fur flowing despite the lack of wind. “My servant has completed his work and returned to rest within the Tree of Life. His loss will be felt, but rest knowing he is at peace.” He lifted a hoof. “And now, the Arceist Tome is fulfilled. The Day of Desolation has passed, and the children who are faithful have passed on to inhabit another of my worlds.” He focused on Lawrence and seemed to smile. “Do not fear, Lawrence; your unbelief of your youth is forgiven. I will no longer remember when you come to be judged.”

Cassia broke away from Lawrence and knelt before him. Lawrence followed, feeling a greater warmth in his chest than he ever had before. The Legend took no notice. “You may speak in my presence, children.”

Cassia slowly looked up, eyes wide. “What…what is this place?”

“A world yet to be created,” Arceus replied. “One that has no time or place with the others in existence.” He lowered his hoof. “I have brought you here to congratulate you for your continued faith in me. Among all my children, none have shown so great as yours.” He looked sadly at Cassia. “I sorrow for the many pains you suffered through your life and am pleased to see you still hold me close to your heart.” He turned to Lawrence. “And you as well, despite your troubled past.”

Although pleased to hear such praise from his creator, Lawrence felt a question nagging at his mind. “Arceus…why did you let Arthus become the Pokémon he was?”

“He was such a good Pokémon…before he changed,” Cassia added, her ears drooping.

Arceus lowered his head and looked away. “As with all my children who fall away, I felt a great loss. He could have been the receiver of many blessings, yet he chose to reject them, believing that I failed to do what was necessary to have a perfect world.” He turned back to Lawrence and Cassia. “But let me ask you, my children: if I had forced Arthus to change, or had intervened to stop him on his path, would the belief of my children be made on faith, or on certainty? Would I have been any better than Arthus in forcing everyone to choose me? Would everyone really do what I desire them if I showed myself to all? Would I be seen as benevolent and just if I had killed someone because of their unbelief in me?”

Neither could argue with his logic. Sensing other concerns, Arceus continued, “Even if I intervened to halt his senseless killing of everyone he loved and more, it would go against the plan I laid for this world and the others I have: allowing them choice. Follow me, and they are given blessings. Otherwise, they choose a life of sadness and grief, all through the others that have chosen the same path. My followers at times suffer such grief, but the grief they bear is nothing compared to the happiness they hold.” He glared at them. “Do not ask his fate. He has defied me in many ways, even going so far as to use my own tool against me. He will be punished, far more than any others who had defied me. But he is also a conflicted, broken child.”

“But what about everyone he killed? Their choice to live was taken from them,” Cassia interjected, feeling guilty for contradicting her creator.

Arceus remained still. “There is also the matter of those that Hoopa never saved; despite the efforts of my servant, even he couldn’t save them. Even still, there are those who were unable to hear your voice. What of them?” Cassia paled, realizing her imperfect coverage of Serenita.

He raised his head higher. “Those who died before their time who would have accepted me, and even those who had their choice taken from them, shall still reside with me in the Tree of Life. Only those who would reject me in any circumstance are isolated from me.”

He shook his head. “Do not dwell on such matters. Now, you must look to the future that the world of man holds for those of Equivos.”

Lawrence rubbed his head, groaning. “Right…Hanson. He’s going to—” His head jolted up. “He’s going to use them. Make them slaves.” He grabbed Cassia’s arm staring at her. “I can’t let that happen!” He looked down at himself and sighed. “But…he’ll just use me too. I’m a Pokémon just like you, and there’s nothing I can do about it.”

Arceus raised his hoof again. “When you first passed through the barrier that separates the dimensions, I changed you to be the way you are. From your human self, to the Lucario you now are.” He narrowed his eyes. “Do you now know why?”

Lawrence considered his question, thinking deeply. “I…I used to hate Pokémon. I thought they were just beasts to study, to help us in time of need…but little more.” He held up his paw, studying it. “When I became a Pokémon, I thought it was the greatest irony, to be the very thing I loathed.” He smiled, turning his paw around. “But then I saw the wonder of Pokémon. I saw that they were really no different from me. At home, they could become the best of companions and act just as we would. But in Equivos, they can stand with us as equals.” He clenched his paw and lowered it. “You changed me to make me realize how wrong I was. I would never have listened to Cassia if I was human. I would never have talked to everyone like a friend. I needed to change, not just as a person, but as a whole.”

Arceus smiled, his eyes still narrowed. “And now that you have experienced life as Lucario, do you wish to remain one?”

Lawrence’s jaw fell. “You mean…you mean, I can go back?” Arceus nodded. He stared down at himself, holding up his paws again. “I…I would like to see myself again…have my fingers, my face…everything. It’s who I am.”

He turned to Cassia, who smile faltered as he spoke. His own fell away. “But…if I turn back…” He held Cassia’s hand. “I could never be with her…at least, not in the way I’d like.” She beamed.

He cringed, closing his eyes. “But I can’t leave Valence, or help everyone else, if I remain a Lucario.” He let go of Cassia’s hand, and both stared at each other, dwelling on the prospects.

After a long moment, Lawrence slowly turned back, his mind set. “Arceus…you gave me the option…” He bowed to him. “But I will let you choose. Whatever you see fit for me, I will follow.”

Arceus’ eyes opened, and he nodded. “Very well. You have indeed changed from before you entered Equivos.” He regarded Cassia, who fought the urge to kneel once more. “And you, Priestess…do you wish to follow Lawrence, whatever path he follows?”

Unflinching, Cassia nodded. “I’d love for him to stay as he is…” She faced him. “But as long as I’m with him, I will follow him.”

Arceus nodded again, lifting his hoof higher. “Both of you have passed my test to prove your faith by leaving your lives in my hands.” Tendrils of light erupted from his arc and surrounded them, causing them to glow. “Your fates have been intertwined ever since you were born. And now, they will be closer, with each following the other.” He held his hoof high, and Cassia and Lawrence both glowed intensely. “Save my children, Keeper and Priestess, with my blessing and gift.” He stamped his hoof, engulfing the world in light. The mortals felt a change, only it felt soothing, pure…welcome.

Just as Arceus had been in their lives.
 
Last edited:
I'd like to start off by asking a question that maybe you resolved in your edits, but I didn't check. Did you make it clear that Matheus sacrificed his Legend status? Because, initially, in his conversation with Cassia and Lawrence, that's not what you convey. They get freaked out over Arthus being able to kill him with the seal... when, in fact, that's not possible at all. And I would think Matheus would assure his two friends that Arthus couldn't kill him with the seal so that they wouldn't worry.

Meanwhile, looks like Lawrence is all like, "Armaggedon out of here!" am I right? *ba-dum-tsssh*

Ahem... anyway, for all the dramatic buildup that this "Keeper" business had throughout parts of the story, Lawrence's revalation about his ultimate role in all of this is underwhelming. It's supposed to be a big aha moment, but it's pretty much skipped over, with Lawrence immediately figuring out he's the Keeper as soon as he gets the page on his Dex. I'd have at least expected a moment for the gears in his head to finally click. Anyway, as it stands, this scenario of shepharding a bunch of 'mons into an Ultra Wormhole actually sounds more Noah's Ark than Rapture initially. If you replace flood with legendaries tearing the world apart. By contrast, Yveltal raining Oblivion Wing(?) down on the guild was a lot more... apocalyptic.

On the flip side, we get confirmation that Equivos and the world of the main line games appear to have a linear, congruent day/night cycle. I don't inherently have a problem with that, but I am a bit baffled that the team at Valence are only just now deciding to give up. In the world of nebulous science corporations, I feel like they'd have given up after a week with no response, tops. Or they'd have at least tried to send some sort of probe or satellite to run a scan. If they did try that, then it deserves a mention. Or, at least, give us a logical reason why this moment is the moment Hanson is pulling the plug. Likewise, I really think you need to show Lawrence having a moment of fear that Hanson won't be able to understand him because he's a Lucario, only to be completely shocked that he can talk to Hanson. That's certainly how I would've felt, because, logically, they shouldn't be able to converse. Unless Arceus created the same universal language for both worlds, which wouldn't make sense because the humans in the main line world can't understand the Pokémon.

And, yes, I'm aware that, in the next Valence Tech scene, the Equivos 'mons are speaking fluent "English." Which raises a ton of questions on my end... and presents some horrifying implications. As it's presented, it makes the Equivos 'mons look like they're superior creatures to the 'mons like the Mightyena the guard uses. But that would fly in the face of "all Pokémon were created as equal under Arceus," mantra the fic's had. I hope there's an explanation coming for it.

Speaking more positively, you did surprise me at the end of the Valence scene. I'd kind of forgotten about Hanson and Valence, so when things started off innocently enough, I thought they were going to be cooperative. But then that last paragraph hit... and it was just so dubious it immediately gave me a bad feeling about what awaits the Equivos 'mons. Especially when the guardian Trevenant offers up, "Now, Keeper, ensure that he did not save his Pokémon only for them to become slaves." That, to me, screams a potential conflict with Valence. The surprise is intensified with the Project Babel bit. Like... wow did that sound extremely sinister. It... kind of makes me feel like Valence's dubious nature should've gotten brought up a bit more often in the story. It's not completely out of left field. But it is a shocking swerve during the climax.

I also do think you do a pretty good job at ratcheting up the tension progressively. Each new scene seems to add a bit of a ripple to the mix. First, with the other Legendaries popping up, and then with Lawrence suddenly deciding to have a moment of crazy heroism. Though, and maybe this has to do with you going into crunch mode to make this chapter, it might've been to your benefit to describe the Legends awakening in more detail. Earthquakes accompanying Groudon's marching. Torrential whirlpools surrounding Kyogre and crashing into the empy coasts. Heck, if Arthus and Matheus are down by the beach, shouldn't at least something bad be happening to them?

The Arthus vs. Matheus fight scene is fluid and there's clearly some anger behind it. Though you really overdid it with the epithets. We know Matheus is a Lucario and Arthus a Zoroark by now, you can use their names and "he" without fear of being repetitive. It's better than using too many epithets, which is what you have right now. Still, I like how Arthus gets more and more desperate, especially after he can't kill Matheus with the seal. It's a fairly solid villainous breakdown, complete with his insistence that he's right. And, to top it all off, he goes down unwillingly and fighting, presenting a stark contrast to Matheus. I think, with some of the changes you've made to the story, Matheus' arc is a bit better and more believable in my eyes.

Onto Arceus, then. And Lawrence pops the question that's been rolling around in my head from the beginning of this. Arceus' answer is that it all comes to free will. Which strikes me as a classic God answer, I suppose. How can life evolve if there's no free will? At face value, it's a logical counter to Arthus, who wanted a world where there is no free will whatsoever. However... there is still, for me, a huge flaw in Arceus' logic. Arceus says that it's all about allowing them choice. So, let me ask you (and Arceus) this, then: did any of Arthus' victims have a choice in being killed by him? Their freedom of choice was stripped from them. Furthermore, adding that bit about "the plan laid for this world," actually starts to make Arceus' logic sound a bit twisted. That's not helped by the fact that this line...
My followers at time suffer such grief, but the happiness they hold is nothing compared to the grief they bear.
... may have been botched. As it reads right now, you're saying that Arceus' followers experience far more grief than they do happiness. I'm assuming you wanted the opposite to be true, because otherwise this makes Arceus look like a demon, not God, and Arthus look like he was in the right the entire time. With that correction, I do think that Lawrence and/or Cassia still need to ask about the Pokémon who are senselessly killed. How have they experienced more happiness? And you'd need to produce a satisfying answer... which I guess has something to do with the Tree of Life? Since that sounds like Equivos' heaven.

So, this could go one of two ways. One: Lawrence and Cassia are turned human. Rather than settling things with violence, as has been done throughout the story so far, they have to rely on their words and reasoning to plead with Hanson to let the Equivos 'mons go. Alternatively, maybe they're human and have to find a way to break them out without any sorts of special powers. Which would present an interesting challenge, to be sure. I'm of the opinion that they will be remaining Pokémon, since that provides the easiest means to "save" the Equivos 'mons from Valence's labs. And it kind of furthers that prophet/shephard think you've set up with Lawrence and Cassia in this last chapter. It could also present a significant quandry as Lucario!Lawrence has to face down the 'mons that are native to the main line world and, as a Lucario, would be able to see, if in fact, the 'mons of his word are like the ones he discovered in Equivos. Since that's what he said to Arceus, I'd be shocked if it turned out different... and probably not in a good way.

On the whole, I'd say this was a pretty solid climax chapter. The stuff I harped on is what prevented the chapter from being completely satisfying for me as far as climaxes go.
 
I'd like to start off by asking a question that maybe you resolved in your edits, but I didn't check. Did you make it clear that Matheus sacrificed his Legend status? Because, initially, in his conversation with Cassia and Lawrence, that's not what you convey. They get freaked out over Arthus being able to kill him with the seal... when, in fact, that's not possible at all. And I would think Matheus would assure his two friends that Arthus couldn't kill him with the seal so that they wouldn't worry.

I purposefully left this unclear due to me wanting it to be a surprise, but upon reading this comment, I can agree with you. Still, I want it to be a little hazy, so I can just say, 'Arthus can't take me with the Seal' and leave it at that, or something of the like.

Ahem... anyway, for all the dramatic buildup that this "Keeper" business had throughout parts of the story, Lawrence's revalation about his ultimate role in all of this is underwhelming. It's supposed to be a big aha moment, but it's pretty much skipped over, with Lawrence immediately figuring out he's the Keeper as soon as he gets the page on his Dex. I'd have at least expected a moment for the gears in his head to finally click. Anyway, as it stands, this scenario of shepharding a bunch of 'mons into an Ultra Wormhole actually sounds more Noah's Ark than Rapture initially. If you replace flood with legendaries tearing the world apart. By contrast, Yveltal raining Oblivion Wing(?) down on the guild was a lot more... apocalyptic.

Yeah, I probably should have devoted some more time to that revelation. I had written up until the beginning of Matheus' fight with Arthus before I became bogged down with projects, so that was a bit of a failure on my part. I can resolve that with some time, however.

On the flip side, we get confirmation that Equivos and the world of the main line games appear to have a linear, congruent day/night cycle. I don't inherently have a problem with that, but I am a bit baffled that the team at Valence are only just now deciding to give up. In the world of nebulous science corporations, I feel like they'd have given up after a week with no response, tops. Or they'd have at least tried to send some sort of probe or satellite to run a scan. If they did try that, then it deserves a mention. Or, at least, give us a logical reason why this moment is the moment Hanson is pulling the plug.

Well, he's devoted a lot of resources to the project, and he had faith that Lawrence would survive with his background. Still, this blind faith wouldn't sit well with, say, his investors. He is awfully desperate to have these talking Pokemon, and considering how much time he's invested into it, he doesn't want to let go. I can put some of that reasoning into his thoughts in his initial scene.

Likewise, I really think you need to show Lawrence having a moment of fear that Hanson won't be able to understand him because he's a Lucario, only to be completely shocked that he can talk to Hanson. That's certainly how I would've felt, because, logically, they shouldn't be able to converse. Unless Arceus created the same universal language for both worlds, which wouldn't make sense because the humans in the main line world can't understand the Pokémon.

As previously explained, the Pokemon of the main world aren't on the same level of sentience as those in Equivos. The mainline Pokemon are sort of between the civilized and wild of Equivos, hence why there's a grey area in terms of the Arceists' beliefs. The reason why the Equivosians are civilized in the first place are sort of why the humans in the mainline world are: the Lake Spirit Pokemon, Uxie, Azelf, and Mesprit.

And, yes, I'm aware that, in the next Valence Tech scene, the Equivos 'mons are speaking fluent "English." Which raises a ton of questions on my end... and presents some horrifying implications. As it's presented, it makes the Equivos 'mons look like they're superior creatures to the 'mons like the Mightyena the guard uses. But that would fly in the face of "all Pokémon were created as equal under Arceus," mantra the fic's had. I hope there's an explanation coming for it.

Well...they are, at least, in intelligence. I never explicitly said that the mainline Pokemon acted on the same level as the Equivosians. They act on a human level more than anything, which was brought up before in Act 1 with Lawrence's originally-written confusion on how to treat them. As said before, it isn't a fair comparison.

Really, the core of 'All Pokemon are created equal' is that you treat all as you would want to. The Arceists trained and loved Pokemon as pets, yes, but they certainly didn't see them like that. They saw them as companions, just as they would another human. The Arcean Texts of Lawrence's world say so.

And there's one other thing to keep in mind: the Arceist Tome was written for Equivos. Sure, many of the truths also apply to Lawrence's world, but what about the wild Pokemon? I don't believe I've written about the relationship the Equivosians had with them. It is sure to be entirely different amongst them.

Speaking more positively, you did surprise me at the end of the Valence scene. I'd kind of forgotten about Hanson and Valence, so when things started off innocently enough, I thought they were going to be cooperative. But then that last paragraph hit... and it was just so dubious it immediately gave me a bad feeling about what awaits the Equivos 'mons. Especially when the guardian Trevenant offers up, "Now, Keeper, ensure that he did not save his Pokémon only for them to become slaves." That, to me, screams a potential conflict with Valence. The surprise is intensified with the Project Babel bit. Like... wow did that sound extremely sinister. It... kind of makes me feel like Valence's dubious nature should've gotten brought up a bit more often in the story. It's not completely out of left field. But it is a shocking swerve during the climax.

Things are never happy for the hero, even in the end, huh?

I also do think you do a pretty good job at ratcheting up the tension progressively. Each new scene seems to add a bit of a ripple to the mix. First, with the other Legendaries popping up, and then with Lawrence suddenly deciding to have a moment of crazy heroism. Though, and maybe this has to do with you going into crunch mode to make this chapter, it might've been to your benefit to describe the Legends awakening in more detail. Earthquakes accompanying Groudon's marching. Torrential whirlpools surrounding Kyogre and crashing into the empy coasts. Heck, if Arthus and Matheus are down by the beach, shouldn't at least something bad be happening to them?

Yeah, I'll definitely toss in more details there.

The Arthus vs. Matheus fight scene is fluid and there's clearly some anger behind it. Though you really overdid it with the epithets. We know Matheus is a Lucario and Arthus a Zoroark by now, you can use their names and "he" without fear of being repetitive. It's better than using too many epithets, which is what you have right now. Still, I like how Arthus gets more and more desperate, especially after he can't kill Matheus with the seal. It's a fairly solid villainous breakdown, complete with his insistence that he's right. And, to top it all off, he goes down unwillingly and fighting, presenting a stark contrast to Matheus. I think, with some of the changes you've made to the story, Matheus' arc is a bit better and more believable in my eyes.

I can go ahead and make those changes.

Onto Arceus, then. And Lawrence pops the question that's been rolling around in my head from the beginning of this. Arceus' answer is that it all comes to free will. Which strikes me as a classic God answer, I suppose. How can life evolve if there's no free will? At face value, it's a logical counter to Arthus, who wanted a world where there is no free will whatsoever. However... there is still, for me, a huge flaw in Arceus' logic. Arceus says that it's all about allowing them choice. So, let me ask you (and Arceus) this, then: did any of Arthus' victims have a choice in being killed by him? Their freedom of choice was stripped from them. Furthermore, adding that bit about "the plan laid for this world," actually starts to make Arceus' logic sound a bit twisted. That's not helped by the fact that this line...
... may have been botched. As it reads right now, you're saying that Arceus' followers experience far more grief than they do happiness. I'm assuming you wanted the opposite to be true, because otherwise this makes Arceus look like a demon, not God, and Arthus look like he was in the right the entire time. With that correction, I do think that Lawrence and/or Cassia still need to ask about the Pokémon who are senselessly killed. How have they experienced more happiness? And you'd need to produce a satisfying answer... which I guess has something to do with the Tree of Life? Since that sounds like Equivos' heaven.

Yeah, that line came out wrong. I can definitely make that change. As for Arthus' killing of those Pokemon, yeah, it does come down to the Tree of Life: any who hold faith in Arceus experience an afterlife of tranquility, while those who do not are punished, because their actions ultimately lead to the unhappiness of others. It's a simple and rather predictable explanation, but even if Arthus kills all the Arceists, they'll still win. They get peace and happiness while Arthus doesn't. If this logic needs refining, feel free to let me know.

Oh, and about this plan laid out for the world, it was more about the chain of prophecies and ultimately the Day of Desolation for the followers of Arceus. And there technically was a plan that Arceus had in mind for the individuals, but it was up to them to follow it: if they held faith, Arceus would bring them to a better existence, while if they didn't, they will end up stagnant or worse off.

So, this could go one of two ways. One: Lawrence and Cassia are turned human. Rather than settling things with violence, as has been done throughout the story so far, they have to rely on their words and reasoning to plead with Hanson to let the Equivos 'mons go. Alternatively, maybe they're human and have to find a way to break them out without any sorts of special powers. Which would present an interesting challenge, to be sure. I'm of the opinion that they will be remaining Pokémon, since that provides the easiest means to "save" the Equivos 'mons from Valence's labs. And it kind of furthers that prophet/shephard think you've set up with Lawrence and Cassia in this last chapter. It could also present a significant quandry as Lucario!Lawrence has to face down the 'mons that are native to the main line world and, as a Lucario, would be able to see, if in fact, the 'mons of his word are like the ones he discovered in Equivos. Since that's what he said to Arceus, I'd be shocked if it turned out different... and probably not in a good way.

I will say nothing on this matter. Just keep in mind what Lawrence and Cassia will have to do after they break out of Valence Tech.

Glad to hear you liked this chapter despite the flaws. Don't worry, I plan on making the changes before I'd post Chapter 24. There's nothing overarching the entire chapter that needs serious revision, as its mostly adding details and changing lines. See you later!
 
Here we are! The epic climax for an epic story! I know it's not the final chapter, but I still feel like I should say that this has been one hell of a ride. Now let's dig in!

Hoopa cackled as he hovered high above Serenita, watching for of his hoops scooping up Pokemon through one in front of him.

*Four?

I’m the Keeper, and if I contact Valence, I can bring everyone there?

Should be a period (or the sentence should be a question).

His coat retained the dull sheen lost from Hoopa’s price.

Hmm... in its current form, this sentence doesn't really make sense. There's two possible meanings I read - either Matheus got his old coat back or he didn't - but both have something erroneus about them. In the former, "retain" doesn't add up as it means to continue having something, and "dull" makes it sound grayish and lifeless. In the latter, the dullness is said to be "lost from Hoopa's price" while it was actually gained - in other words, that would kind of be a double negative of sorts. So, my critique depends on which option you meant.

She caressed the Tome, walking ack to Lawrence.

*back

If anyone’s got a chance to stop him, he does.

Hmm, it might sound better with "it's him" or "it's Matheus" in place of "he does". To me, "does" with "has got" doesn't sound quite right.

It scraped against the sand—jutting to a halt—and the sodden Pokemon aboard dove to the sand and thanked Arceus for their safety.

oof, irony ;)

Arthus’ claws emanated with Life.

Not a native, but from what I could research, "emanated" can't be used with "with" like "glow" can. So that'd either be "emanated Life" or "glowed with Life", but the second was used just a little bit later, so I recommend the first.

He swept Arthus’ legs and rolled underneath the falling Zoroark, then darted into a dense cluster of trees. Arthus clambered to his feet and snorted, the Seal still in his grip. “You can’t avoid your fate!” He rushed for the running Lucario, slashing at trees, still reaching out to touch his fur.

Paragraph begins with an action by Matheus, but the (tag free) line of dialogue belongs to Arthus, which to me hurts the readability. Consider changing up the paragraph borders to make it clearer?

It crashed through the glass and burned the wood instantly, melting stone and disintegrating the books in its path. It surged toward Gardner and caught him in its light, bringing the Life of the Metagross to Yveltal, the Destruction Legend.

*Martre. But I do suppose they have a similar ring to them now that I think about it... hmm.

Lawrence distributed small packs of supplies to the displaced Pokemon of Serenita underneath the Tree of Life, the multi-colored leaves continuing to shine bright despite the storm. Gardner gathered them into groups, while Cassia lined them up, all under Lawrence’s direction.

Now if I was REALLY nitpicky, I'd say that the "them" in the second sentence is technically pointing to the leaves of the Tree here. And because I am that nitpicky, I just told you. :p

The Trevenant marched toward Lawrence and Cassia, his arms lowered and scraping against the soil. “The day has come. Yveltal has flown, and soon, his fellow Legends will follow in his wake.” He lifted his hand and placed it against the edge of the hut. The three Buneary cautiously climbed out, covering their heads from the rain. The Trevenant placed his other hand over them as he lowered them to the ground.

His maw curled into a smile. “I have cared for you as long as I am able.” His Phantump drifted away from him and swarmed over the three Buneary, creating cover from the rains.

Aww, so cute... but also sad. :<

The Phantump mewled mournfully their erratic nature slowed by the passing of their parent.

Think a comma is missing between "mournfully" and "their"?

“A-All the pack are out. I-I-I—achoo!”

*Packs?

The population gazed at him in awe, many never seeing a Lucario after Arthus’ takeover of the continent.

"Never having seen" given the tense of the story, I think.

Matheus pulled away from Lawrence and chased the Zoroark. “We can’t let him get to Arceus!”



“I’ll stop him!” Lawrence exclaimed, swiftly running ahead of his elder. Matheus’ cry was drowned out by a sudden boom of thunder as Zekrom unleashed his power on the Xilo Mountains, instantly reducing them to rubble.

Accidental newlines between these two paragraphs?

Lawrence ringed squeezing his eyes shut.

Did you mean "cringed, squeezing"?

Groudon’s fury encroaching the continent early Trees fell all around him

Missing period.

At the edge, the wormhole warped and teared the air around it,

*tore

Cassia ran for the Lucario, joining him and asking, “Where’s Matheus!

Should be question mark, imo.

They both looked up and turned to witness a marvelous sight. A magnificent Pokemon with pure white fur and golden appendages towered over them, looking down with gentle, scarlet eyes. Green gems sparkled on the arc around his chest, and his hooves hovered with splendid grace, their tips just above the floor.

I love the detail, especially the last one. It's so subtle but clearly speaks of how Arceus is on a totally another level of being.

Neither could argue with his logic Sensing other concerns,

Missing period.

He turned to Cassia, who smile faltered as he spoke. His own fell away. “But…if I turn back…” He held Cassia’s hand. “I could never be with her…at least, not in the way I’d like.” She beamed.

*suppresses inappropriate thoughts*

He let go of Cassia’s hand, and both stared at each other, dwelling o the prospects.

*on

General Comments

Man, was this intense. The already apocalyptic atmosphere surged to thousandfold as basically all the legendaries just come together and wreck everything with enormous attacks of every element. The characters running around kept up the feeling of hurry in spite of the migration of the Equivosians probably being pretty slow and monotonous in real time.

Just as it was from the start, though, the morality of Arceus is still questionable - the theme of him allowing choice and not intervening (though still sometimes doing it) is a good contrast to Arthus, but on other hand, it's essentially comparable to a landlord of a monster-ravaged land with the landlord having infinite amounts of monster repellent but refusing to distribute it to anyone who doesn't swear allegiance to him, causing the "nonbelievers" to become snacks to the wild beasts. It's not the same, as what Arceus asks for isn't much and actually inspires altruism which in the long run will be beneficial to all, but it's still a bit close to the line. Cassia did claim she reached all towns and all mon, but there's likely still the odd hermit or low-ranking Guild member who never heard enough good arguments to switch to Arceism.

However, the problem of who has choice, who is truly evil and why a higher power would allow pain are among the biggest questions of life and philosophy, so I don't expect anyone to actually give a fully logical, all encompassing answer to them - much less so in a 24-chapter fanfic. Mind-blowing life advice is not something I read fanfiction for, so some moral dilemmas left unanswered is not big a deal all things considered. I read fics for entertainment and I definitely got it from Unequivocant. Plus, you got me rambling this much, so I can't say it didn't make me think!

One more chapter remains, however, and I'm very curious about how it'll go. Going to the human world is a better alternative than literally dying, but that doesn't make it candyland for the mon. Color me looking forward to the final chapter.
 
Please note: The thread is from 5 years ago.
Please take the age of this thread into consideration in writing your reply. Depending on what exactly you wanted to say, you may want to consider if it would be better to post a new thread instead.
Back
Top Bottom