First off, thank you for taking the time to reply. I do really appreciate it.
I generally agree with what you've said for act 1, and some of those are things I can easily fix (either directly or indirectly). The act 2 things are much harder, so... I guess the best I can do is explain my...
Now that the entirety of act 2 is up, I think this is probably a good time to take a break for a week or two. I want to use the time I normally use for editing upcoming chapters for a couple of things:
I've gotten some feedback from some people (privately) and I want to back and incorporate it...
P2.08 – Helping Hand
Dawn stood with her back against the oran tree, roasting one of its fruits. She knew she should eat her fill before she started her search. As she held her tail up to the fruit's skin, she was careful to keep her bandaged hand from being exposed to the fire.
Going on...
P2.07 – The Missing Pieces
Dawn kept searching for a few hours before she finally found something relevant to Honedges. According to the pokédex, a Honedge is occasionally formed when a 'person' (a human, most likely) is killed by a sword. Apparently, their spirit then inhabits the sword that...
P2.06 – Eggs and Bonds
Slowly, Dawn could feel herself warming up. As Dusk's grip on her wrist relaxed, she stretched her numb hand. Every time he inhaled, her chest felt stiff and sore. Her wrist stung.
What had she just seen? Was Dusk dead? Was he truly dead?
No, that was impossible...
P2.04 – Flametaker
"It… wasn't..."
Lang's grip tightened. "Am I supposed to believe that!?"
Without air to keep her fire going, she started to get numb. There was nothing she could do. But she couldn't give up.
Air rushed back into her lungs. She gasped and coughed up feeble, pale...
Ok, I've only read the first couple of chapters so far, but I really like what I see! I'm a little rusty on my Pokemon Colosseum knowledge, but hopefully that'll be ok. (I've only watched some LP's.... maybe I'll play 'em one day, though.)
I also have always been really curious about the...
P2.03 – A Reality to Outrun
Something stirs. I don't hear it. I don't see it. But I know it's there.
I open my eyes, but I still don't see anything. Is it that dark? Have I lost my eyes?
I try to say something, but I'm quiet. Am I missing my mouth, too?
Do I even exist? What...
P2.02 – Paper Lantern
Dawn pushed the door open just enough so that she could poke her head through. It was very dark on the inside, making it impossible for her to see anything. She hesitated, not sure if she should step inside or wait until her eyes could adjust a bit.
"Welcome," said a...
I reviewed Galar's Darkest Hour, and I think this is the right point total? (Sorry, I'm still new to this...)
Base: 2
Chapters reviewed: +2
Word count: +1
Review game: +6
Total: 11 points
I'll be keeping up with Galar's Darkest Hour (and posting more in the thread), but I'm not going to try...
So, uh... I wasn't even really aware how the Review Game worked when I wrote my review for Skalesgon's Galar's Darkest Hour, but I guess that counts? I was looking at the update in the rules thread, and saw that they were wanting a review. Sooo.... yeah?
Uhm, though I wasn't planning on doing...
[I've read chapters 1 and 2. I'll read 3 in a bit, but I wanted to write this out before I did that.]
As someone who felt the original Sw/Sh story was a bit on the lacking side, I totally welcome a fan-retelling of the story. And I'm glad you're exploring Leon and especially Hop a bit more. And...
Hehe, almost missed the first update... that'd be kind of a bad sign if I can't stick to the plan in the first week.
P2.01 – Morning
Rain pelted the roof of branches and leaves. In some spots, the water leaked through, falling into mud puddles on the floor of the small, ancient shack. Dawn...
P1.03 – Double Edge
Her heart was pounding. She gagged and collapsed. She couldn't get enough air. Her chest killed her, even though she shouldn't feel pain while in this place.
That voice. Those thoughts. The pressure. Those eyes. Oh, those hideous, burning eyes.
She opened her...
P1.02 – Heroes Don't Die
No one moved. Lin focused, ready for any quick movement. She considered striking now. Putting on pressure would prevent this opponent from doing whatever they planned. But that would be a risky move. No telling what this thing was... what it was capable of. What it...
After Dusk Falls
P1.01 – Second Chance
The lights flickered throughout the off-white hall. The underground facility had no windows to let in the moonlight, so when the lights went out again, it became impossible to see anything.
"Figures," a gruff, female voice said. "That didn't...
Alright, cool! I think Oct 10-12 seems like a good range... my Fridays are crazy but my Mondays are more chill. Hopefully I should only need a couple of days... when my hands are doing alright, I'm pretty fast.
Ooh, interesting!
But when's the latest we can sign up? I'm having issues with my hands and idk when they'll get better. If I sign up now but end up needing to pass, is that alright?
Yessss! I love this series, and I'm really happy it's back! :bulbaLove:
I find it kind of funny that I went through the game with Sobble as my starter, yet I didn't know that they had the ability to camouflage. (...and I was even playing on Shield, which has the Pokedex entry that brings this...
May or may not be relevant: I know very little of the PMD games, so I'm not too familiar with their plots. Yes, I do take some inspiration from PMD, but saying this is set in the PMD universe would probably be wrong. World-building will happen very gradually throughout the entire story, so I am...
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