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Granted, but you don't get an answer. You decide that really, it was pointless to ask a spool of thread a question, as none have ever been known to talk. I wish I had shapeshifting powers.

Granted, but out of any username you've had on any site in the past, you have the most embarrassing one possible. I wish I had a button on my desk at home that I could press, and every time I pressed that button, someone showed up at my door with a free large veggie pizza for me.

Granted, but since you posted that wish in Corrupt a Wish, it's implied that you wish for there to be some catch, so just granted. Your father is not a bigot, no strings attached. I wish the next person to respond to this won a million US dollars.

Granted, but you cause the grandfather paradox to happen. I wish I had portal-based superpowers.

Granted. Your 3DS now runs on a nuclear reactor. I wish there were good costumes as DLC for the Gen 6 Pokemon games.

Granted, but then as you're loading the game, the screen breaks in two. I wish I could play any musical instrument well.

Granted. You are now a huntail that's been caught and put into an aquarium in a shopping center. I wish I could actually go into fictional worlds.

Granted, but since there is no bad news, everyone stops caring about the news. I wish I had wished for something before.

Granted, but you never get ahold of any pokemon with IVs above 5.

You become a popular celebrity and never get a moment's privacy ever again. Ever. I wish I had some strawberries and whipped cream.

The genie misunderstands you, thinking you mean the geographical formation, and makes all the world's oases join to form one huge lake with you at the bottom. I wish I were smart.

Granted, but you're the one everyone kidnaps from each other. I wish I had Ho-hos.