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- Sep 23, 2013
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- #321
Magenta.
Right now my favorite is Fruit Punch flavored sparkling water.
Ready for my life story?
School was a mixed bag for me. I had a lot of great teachers, but I also had some that I struggled to learn from. Particularly in math classes. Math was a nightmare for me always and I'm so glad I'm done with it forever.
Overall, pre-college I made mediocre grades. Even in history and music. I did not know how to study back then, so I struggled with tests. I did, however, love history classes even if I was like making C's. D: The highlight of my high school experience was marching band. I was fortunate to end up in a school with a nationally competitive marching band. My senior year, in particular, was spectacular. Couldn't have asked for a better way to go out. lol.
Socially, I struggled even more than I did with keeping great grades. I was bullied relentlessly in elementary school and middle school (and some in high school) for me being visibly (beyond even my own knowledge pre-high school) queer. In high school, the bullying was less of a thing, but this was perhaps the harshest time for me, as I made numbers of "friends" only for them to turn on me. I was left feeling bitter, like I couldn't trust anyone and that I was just "annoying" by nature and that no one would stick with me for long.
College has been a very complicated, long-term experience for me. This is in great part because of health issues and other personal issues striking me hard in my freshman semester.
I had really good grades in my freshman semester. I decided to major in music, despite me being mediocre at it. I had even been told by my music theory teacher at high school that I shouldn't pursue music. I did not understand Music Theory in high school. It would not click. But in college, it clicked pretty quick for me as did a lot of other things.
But the health issues came into the scene and in my second semester and the first semester of my sophomore year, I did not do well. You have to understand that my mental state was shattered and I began to see everything I did as "pointless" because I did not see a future, but at the same time I wanted to remain in college because it made me feel like everything was still okay.
(seeing as it's now some 14 years later, you may think me a hypochondriac, but that's not the truth. It's...complicated, and saying much more wouldn't make sense without be explaining what the health issues are, which I've already typed so much and need to move on)
It took me several years to get my Associate's Degree. I then tried to move on to university in Music Education (band director), but it was not meant to be. I attempted to work and commute to the university and it did not go well. I dropped out after the first year. I loved the university, I loved the professors. No one was to blame except for myself and my mediocrity (alongside my health). I did get to play in the university's symphony orchestra and it was really special!
Finally, a few years later, I somehow got pulled back into music (seriously, if I told this story, it would seem like something out of fiction) and I returned to university. This time with a more concrete, better fitting goal for me - Musicology (Music History). From this you can extrapolate my favorite subject, too. I adore music history. I joined this forum just one semester after dropping out of the first university, but my username (which is still my username) I learned from taking my music history textbook and reading it for fun (I was only in Music History II at that university, which was Baroque and onwards, while the aulos, being from ancient Greece clearly was from Music History I). It was when I read the music history book outside of the class's bounds (while the rest of the music students hated music history) that I began to realize that music history is my thing and actually always had been. (I seriously read and loved a book on the history of woodwind instruments in high school lol)
So I returned, got my bachelor's degree. But life has stepped in and made it hard for me to continue on at this point. That's another long story. Basically I need to be proficient at two western European languages to get into music history in grad school. Personal issues and the pandemic have made that difficult.
Post my sophomore year my grades went up, as I learned how to study and write essays. Even at the university I dropped from, I had really good grades the two semesters I was there. And at my university I graduated from, I made straight A's one semester, full-time. It was hard fought for and felt very good.
I got rewards and graduated cum laude. I know that's not super amazing, but my GPA there was 3.8 (it's lower total for all colleges). Pretty good, for me!
Socially, I don't know that I have to say. I grew up a lot in college thinks to the struggles I faced and even came out for the first time and had my first girlfriend. But that didn't last long, and most of my college years were spent miserably in the closet and miserably lonely. It was hard for me to connect with many students when I returned to university in 2016, because I was in my upper 20s and a lot of the students there were near a decade younger than me. I did join the LGBT club there, for what it matters, since I lived on my own and didn't have to tell my parents about it. But... it was for support, not love.
Lol... No one needs to know this much. What is wrong with me? D:
Favorite subject, as I said - music history. I also love regular history. I have taken a number of European history courses and enjoyed them all thoroughly. I'd love to say an ensemble class as well, but due to my mediocrity, most of my time in ensembles has been anxiety inducing. The orchestra I mentioned earlier was really neat though, and I fell in love with a number of pieces that we played there. I would give anything to play them on oboe and English horn.
Overall, pre-college I made mediocre grades. Even in history and music. I did not know how to study back then, so I struggled with tests. I did, however, love history classes even if I was like making C's. D: The highlight of my high school experience was marching band. I was fortunate to end up in a school with a nationally competitive marching band. My senior year, in particular, was spectacular. Couldn't have asked for a better way to go out. lol.
Socially, I struggled even more than I did with keeping great grades. I was bullied relentlessly in elementary school and middle school (and some in high school) for me being visibly (beyond even my own knowledge pre-high school) queer. In high school, the bullying was less of a thing, but this was perhaps the harshest time for me, as I made numbers of "friends" only for them to turn on me. I was left feeling bitter, like I couldn't trust anyone and that I was just "annoying" by nature and that no one would stick with me for long.
College has been a very complicated, long-term experience for me. This is in great part because of health issues and other personal issues striking me hard in my freshman semester.
I had really good grades in my freshman semester. I decided to major in music, despite me being mediocre at it. I had even been told by my music theory teacher at high school that I shouldn't pursue music. I did not understand Music Theory in high school. It would not click. But in college, it clicked pretty quick for me as did a lot of other things.
But the health issues came into the scene and in my second semester and the first semester of my sophomore year, I did not do well. You have to understand that my mental state was shattered and I began to see everything I did as "pointless" because I did not see a future, but at the same time I wanted to remain in college because it made me feel like everything was still okay.
(seeing as it's now some 14 years later, you may think me a hypochondriac, but that's not the truth. It's...complicated, and saying much more wouldn't make sense without be explaining what the health issues are, which I've already typed so much and need to move on)
It took me several years to get my Associate's Degree. I then tried to move on to university in Music Education (band director), but it was not meant to be. I attempted to work and commute to the university and it did not go well. I dropped out after the first year. I loved the university, I loved the professors. No one was to blame except for myself and my mediocrity (alongside my health). I did get to play in the university's symphony orchestra and it was really special!
Finally, a few years later, I somehow got pulled back into music (seriously, if I told this story, it would seem like something out of fiction) and I returned to university. This time with a more concrete, better fitting goal for me - Musicology (Music History). From this you can extrapolate my favorite subject, too. I adore music history. I joined this forum just one semester after dropping out of the first university, but my username (which is still my username) I learned from taking my music history textbook and reading it for fun (I was only in Music History II at that university, which was Baroque and onwards, while the aulos, being from ancient Greece clearly was from Music History I). It was when I read the music history book outside of the class's bounds (while the rest of the music students hated music history) that I began to realize that music history is my thing and actually always had been. (I seriously read and loved a book on the history of woodwind instruments in high school lol)
So I returned, got my bachelor's degree. But life has stepped in and made it hard for me to continue on at this point. That's another long story. Basically I need to be proficient at two western European languages to get into music history in grad school. Personal issues and the pandemic have made that difficult.
Post my sophomore year my grades went up, as I learned how to study and write essays. Even at the university I dropped from, I had really good grades the two semesters I was there. And at my university I graduated from, I made straight A's one semester, full-time. It was hard fought for and felt very good.
I got rewards and graduated cum laude. I know that's not super amazing, but my GPA there was 3.8 (it's lower total for all colleges). Pretty good, for me!
Socially, I don't know that I have to say. I grew up a lot in college thinks to the struggles I faced and even came out for the first time and had my first girlfriend. But that didn't last long, and most of my college years were spent miserably in the closet and miserably lonely. It was hard for me to connect with many students when I returned to university in 2016, because I was in my upper 20s and a lot of the students there were near a decade younger than me. I did join the LGBT club there, for what it matters, since I lived on my own and didn't have to tell my parents about it. But... it was for support, not love.
Lol... No one needs to know this much. What is wrong with me? D:
Favorite subject, as I said - music history. I also love regular history. I have taken a number of European history courses and enjoyed them all thoroughly. I'd love to say an ensemble class as well, but due to my mediocrity, most of my time in ensembles has been anxiety inducing. The orchestra I mentioned earlier was really neat though, and I fell in love with a number of pieces that we played there. I would give anything to play them on oboe and English horn.
