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Chuck Norris Jokes.

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The Magneton

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Post your own Chuck Norris jokes.
I have a few:
Chuck norris once roundhouse kicked a horse in the face, it's now commonly known as "Giraffe!"
Kiddies at night wear Superman pyjamas, Superman at night wears Chuck Norris jokes!
 

Calcium

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How can they wear jokes? 0_o

(My one is spoilered because some Christians might find it offensive, if they're really religious)
Jesus walks on water, Chuck Norris walks on Jesus.
 
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In 2005 Chuck Norris, Mr.T, and VIn Diesel were fishing in the gulf of mexico. Mr. T told Vin Diesel to pull his finger. Right as his finger was pulled Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him in the stomach. The resulting flatulance was more widley known as hurricane katrina.
 

Instrutilus

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Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris cannot fly. He just jumps and chooses when to come down.

=L
 

Sarcastically Insane

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Chuck Norris slams revolving doors.

Chuck Norris's wife is probably the only woman on the planet that can take Chuck Norris's manliness. His four children are also the four manliest kids on earth, even though they're all girls.
 

OCDysseus

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Slythe, I think is like this:

Jesus may walk on water, but CN can swim through land.
 

EdelsteinBraginski_

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Ooohhh, I have alot. >:3

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits.
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his own father.
When Chuck Norris does push-ups, he doesn't push himself, he pushes the world down.
Chuck Norris sued MySpace for stealing his name for the world.
Chuck Norris has lost his virginity and got it back.
 

That Guy

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Chuck Norris invented every colour of the spectrum, except pink, which was invented by Justin Bieber.

^not mine^
 

Outcast

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Chuck Norris puts "laughter" in the word "manslaughter"
 

Kamex

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The only word that rhymes with orange is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can win the game.
Chuck norris can eat one Pringle.
In Soviet Russia, Chuck Norris still kicks you.
 

Sarcastically Insane

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Chuck Norris played Russian Roullette with a fully loaded Desert Eagle, shot first, took the next eight turns, then gave the gun to the other player who proceeded to have his head explode. That man is remembered as one of the few brave souls to not only challenge Chuck Norris, but actually be able to stand close to him.
 

DracoMan

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar...

and the bar says, "Ow!"
 

That Guy

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The medical term for death is 'Chuck Norris Was Here Syndrome'.
 

Calcium

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Slythe, I think is like this:

Jesus may walk on water, but CN can swim through land.
There's two variations of it.

In the beginning, there was nothing, but then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and told it to get a job. And so, the universe was born.
 

OCDysseus

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Chuck Norris spent 45 minutes eating 3 72-onze steaks. The first 43 minutes were spent having sex with the waiter.
 
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