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Corrupt a Wish v2

Granted, you are now living on-board the International Space Station indefinitely.

I wish I could think of a better wish than this...
 
Granted, but you forget how to read so now a scary Samuel L. Jackson is tutoring you. Enjoy!

I wish the two dreamy guys at Woolworth's would notice me more
 
Granted, they start stalking you.

I wish to become a gloworm, as I have heard that they are never glum.
 
Granted, you are a gloworm, but they are actually glum all the time and so are you.

I wish I hadn't just watched The Hateful Eight because it was hella long and not that good.
 
Granted, instead you watched High School Musical and now your taste in music has regressed to such an extent you're banned from life. :p

I wish my big brother was staying longer... :(
 
Granted, but every single member of your familly, living or dead, decides to join you.

I wish for a new Sonic game that isn't related to Sonic Boom in any way.
 
Granted, enjoy your copy of Kirby's Adventure Wii... Which doesn't work due to being from a different region then your console.

I wish for a cake.
 
Granted. And your puppy has rabies.

I wish this wish was ignored.
 
Granted. But your wish never come true.

I wish I can see KM again.
 
Granted, but he was under surveillance by the CIA so you were arrested, interrogated with nippy rabbits and they framed you for killing Kennedy

I wish my rabbit would stop having bowl trouble so I could cuddle him
 
Granted, but your rabbit became savage and eats everyone.

I wish no more bats at F&G. No offense.
 
Granted, but since i also don't want to have bats, your wish is ignored.(sadly...)

I wish someone would tell me why is the forums have a "bat" theme now...
 
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