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COMPLETE: digs, dives {wuc} {TEEN}

PeaceSign

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HIIII Writer's Workshop! I'm super happy we have this collab going on and wanted to drop one of my stories in <3 This is a small section from the upcoming chapter of a Haikyuu fantasty AU I'm currently writing and is rated teen for language. I hope you enjoy!

wc: 3,432


Iwaizumi Hajime sets Oikawa’s whole world on fire. When she thinks of her, she sees a sun setting into the water, giving life and meaning to the sky above and stars below. Her scent, her rare smile, her stupid sarcasm kindles life into Oikawa and begins everything anew so that her every cell screams for life. This is the song set to her whole universe. You are everything to me.

It began when they were four. Whatever it is, Oikawa swore that the small one floundering about in her flower garden would be hers. She moved with deliberate, feather steps then, swiping at butterflies with a precocious understanding of care and kindness.

“They live short lives, so I wanna see them go quick,” she says, eyes already tinted with seriousness. She opens her palms so that the butterfly within flitters away, battering fairy dust on them. Sneezing when they land upon her little, thick legs, Iwaizumi blushes. Oikawa smiles so bright, life shines a tint lighter.

“I’m Iwaizumi Hajime.”

“Oikawa Tooru,” she announces, eagerly encompassing the other girl in a full-bodied hug. “Show me the rest of them!”

“Sure,” little Iwaizumi says, grabbing the other girl’s hand and guiding them towards a field of flowers. Just like that, they’d walk forward together for time to come. Ten years ago marked the shift.

“Because I was eight and stupid and obsessed with you, Hajime,” she muses, “and you didn’t say no when I dragged you down to the docks alone.” Slaps of cold salt to their face, the unsteady swell and push of the waves as Oikawa unhitched the tiny boat from its cradle. Oikawa’s mothers had been around Aoba Johsai then, but Oikawa knows intimately the emptiness that fills her. The vacancy of their backs turned to her. A nuisance child, troublemaker, not fit to be Queen. The songs we sung about you were for this broken country, not for you.

“Tooru?” the child asks, tiny hand reaching out to her. She brought her the most beautiful flower, a butterfly perched upon its velvet petals. A gift from me to you, to symbolize us.

Oikawa turns.

“Tooru?”

That hand reaches out to her again with frozen fingers. Ice trails up the palm before water crashes into it, crushing her skin into a million pieces -

Oikawa lunges onto the remnants of Hajime, diving deep so that her lungs fill with water and she can barely breath but she won’t lose her because she’s already lost someone; and liquid panic pours down her spine for every second she lunges for Hajime’s hand and she can’t quite reach, panic so intense it spreads to the end of all of her synapses and screams for her body to grow longer so that she can catch Hajime -

At the end of it, she can’t be sure if she ever does. Reality collapses in upon her, restructuring everything she knows about her life. Because Iwaizumi’s parents are nowhere to be found, on Seijoh or Shiratorizawa. She swears a part of her Hajime is still out there, drowning, calling her name.

“Tooru?”

Oikawa turns this time and can’t look away from the hand reaching out to her. But she feels the fire expunging all the islands of the world so that the blues of Seijoh and the sky and the sea and space all dissipate to nothing. This time, Oikawa can’t touch anything no matter how far she reaches - everything is lost by her hand, finished, completed. A thousand butterfly wings incinerate to a crisp.

Hajime, her Hajime, burning.

Oikawa’s head all but implodes when she wakes up. Sound and sight cut straight through perception, making her painfully aware of every swell of the ship, of the sweat sticking to her skin, of the silence suffocating her in this room alone. She kicks off the blankets, hands flying through her hair before quickly sitting up. Pants echo across the room and her first priority is to ascertain that she’s okay -

“Welcome to diving drills,” Iwaizumi announces to the women before her. They stand in a line about the bow, focused on the girl who’s kicked her hammers to the side. Morning sunshine streams through the clouds, bright upon her skin. “Basically, this is a prime technique to improve your Spirit’s stability. No matter what happens, you want to keep your Spirit up as a guard around you to reduce damage.”

Iwaizumi cranes her neck over the railing of the ship, flashing a mischievous smile back at her team. “You’re gonna coat yourself in your Spirit before diving straight down into the ocean. It’ll be the coldest, most brutal sensation you’ve ever felt. That will make your Spirit all the stronger. Don’t even think about turning back upwards until you feel like you might faint, and even then, toe that line. I’ll be up here keeping tabs of everyone’s Spirit.”

At that exact moment, a shrill scream shoots out across the ship: “Iwa-chan!”

“Sleepykawa!” Iwaizumi booms! “Of course you’re late!”

“Iwa-chan, you won’t believe the dream I just ha-!” Outstretched arms reach for her. Iwaizumi takes advantage of this, grabbing onto her elbows, shifting the balance, moving her - !

“Nuh-uh! You’re the first example, then!”

Without further notice, Iwaizumi throws her into the ocean!

Oikawa’s Spirit surges to life the second her skin meets the water. Clinging tight to her, it engulfs her body in a warmth that keeps her alive in the sub-zero water, pressure incomprehensible to the human body. Oikawa’s eyes burst open, suddenly aware of the little lights guiding life far down in sea. Her heels sluice past the water, eager to reach the bottom. Spirit and pressure form an inverse relationship as she pushes further, so deep that the lights all vanish, so far that her soul resonates in her ears.

“To review,” Iwaizumi says calmly, ignoring Yahaba’s concerned wail. “Spirit is basically a manifestation of your pride, your drive, your passion to win. It multiplies when in the presence of those who believe in you. It dampens in the face of overwhelming obstacle. As you’ve seen, Spirit makes your attacks stronger, but a reckless manifestation of it will only tire you. Unlocking the secrets of Spirit has been a prime concern to Seijoh for years.”

Kyoutani nods, completely unperturbed by a missing Oikawa. Makki and Mattsun whisper quietly to each other, completely zoned out, lost in the sanctuary of their giggles.

“Generating Spirit, controlling it, and enforcing it through your every action and thought is the key to strength.”

Oikawa’s toes touch the rigid surface floor. With a pout, she kicks off, the teal light of her Spirit the only penetration of pure darkness.

“You can give Spirit to others, but only with positive intention. A corrupted Spirit could spell death for anyone.”

Somersaulting back onto the ship, a curtain of water arching along her leap, Oikawa smiles! The warrior princess dives back on bearing a crustacean in either hand that are half of her size. Beige shells splattered with red dots reveal the age of the creatures. The Kingler wriggle about, claws seizing the air. “For you, Iwa-chan. Since you’re so crabby, I thought you’d get along!” She swoops in to press a kiss to Iwaizumi’s cheek.

So simply, all her sanity had been restored.

“Gay,” Mattsun whispers loudly. A smile lights up Makki’s face.

“What a bitch,” Kyoutani replies.

“Shittykawa,” Iwaizumi hisses. “I really do like crab.”

From there, an intense day of training commences!

“Receiving drills!” Iwaizumi shouted at one point, that moment a blur in a timeline of agonizing pain. Matsukawa can’t remember the last time she had stood for so long, much less moved her body back and forth, her bow splitting from her spine as one. The tip of her spears touch the sky before boomeranging back to her. Spirit spills forth from the moment they leave her holster, arching across the sky, gently descending back to her palms. Huffing, guiding their direction with her intent alone, she feels like a coil pressed to snap.

“More digs!”

Oikawa races forward to Makki, nearly knocking her down by brandishing her swords at her. With a hair’s width of time, Makki presses her own axe against the other girl. And then they move. Makki giggles as Oikawa forces her back, her Spirit buckling underneath Oikawa’s strength. Slight splinters burst upwards from the wood at their feet until they full-on crack, Makki’s feet sinking further into the boat as Oikawa drags her back -

“Damn, Oikawa!” she says with a smile, sweat falling down her forehead. “I coulda sworn you were tryna kill me!”

“You’re probably not wrong,” Kyoutani teases from somewhere. Iwaizumi sits cross-legged across from her, her palm pushed against her forehead. “Focus on me, Kyo,” rolls out her gruff voice. Kyoutani snaps back to attention, dropping her hands in her lap. Closing her eyes, she feels Spirit rippling to the surface of her conscious, covering her body in mauve. “More,” Iwaizumi challenges. Kyoutani obeys with a grunt, trying not to physically shiver with the weight of gathering everything she has and more to the surface.

“Bye bye, Makki-chan!” Oikawa cheers as the girl topples over the ship. Two feet-shaped trails are torn into the ship as if Oikawa dragged away an Ursaring by tooth and nail.

“Ugh, I don’t have any more,” Kyoutani whines. She’s going light-headed fast.

“You do.” The words are fact. “We all believe in you.” Iwaizumi leans her palm down with slightly more force, eyes narrowing. “Let our belief flow through you. That’s how Spirit works. That’s what being on a team means, even if you don’t like us, even if you don’t respect us, we all support each other.” She feels the girl’s Spirit diminish slightly with her words. Iwaizumi lowers her gaze, biting her lip.

“Almost all of you,” Kyoutani stammers out. Sweat rolls down her body as she struggles to keep her body upright. Spirit spurts out of control, her emotions now more in control of her than her mind before a certain voice reels her back to reality -

“Psst. Mad-dog chan.” A finger pokes the side of her temple. “Hallo,~” she sings in the sickest of whispers.

Kyoutani’s Spirit flares around her in a mighty halo! Oikawa dips her scarred finger in Kyoutani’s light, marveling as the lined scar blurs back into her body. She relishes in the light pouring over her, grateful for Kyoutani’s healing Spirit!

“I hate you,” Kyoutani breaths out with no real venom, heaving as she averts her gaze from the warrior princess. She fights the realization threatening to blow her over, fights the knowledge that that nonsensical dimwit would actually believe in her -

“Good job,” Iwaizumi praises Kyoutani, bringing her head close to her chest as she ruffles her hair. An affectionate, approving glance flashes towards Oikawa before Iwaizumi announces, “Last round of drills for today!”

The three remaining women drag themselves before Oikawa and Iwaizumi, worse off for wear. Mattsun leans upon her bow, heavy eyelids fluttering about, looking for a pink-haired energy ball. Kyoutani curls up in fetal position, closing her eyes, her breath drifting away in long, rhythmic notes.

“That’s all you’ve got?” Iwaizumi challenges the group, her eyebrows perking up. “You’re all strong. There’s room to grow, and you better challenge yourself because if you thought today was hell, tomorrow's the next level down.”

“Iwa-chan, doesn’t that only bring us closer to Earth?”

Yahaba throws her staff to the side, exorcising an old ghost that lingered within. A breath of life gushes through her, releasing her from all she didn’t know clung to her, sticking to bone and thought.

“How, Oikawa?”

“I think she means that if Hell was the furthest level to begin with, you’d start cycling the other way over,” Kyoutani murmurs from the floor. Her head curls further into herself, blonde bangs covering her face so no one can see the blush sweeping across her.

“Huh,” Iwaizumi muses. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” She clears her throat, ignoring Oikawa’s smirk. “If today was purgatory, then tomorrow’s hell, which is even worse!”

Yahaba makes up her mind before her heart can say no. Instantly, she sprints from their end of the ship to the other, running hot as she fully flings her arms towards the depths of the ocean. With an angelic expression resting on her face, faith finds her so she flies. Three meters of air are cleared above her before she shoots into the cold spray below.

“What a beautiful dive,” Oikawa says. Pride replaces all the air stripped from her lungs as she commits this moment to memory. “Swim far and deep, mustering all your Spirit, Yah-chan.” She exclaims the next second, “Well, beautiful even if it comes second place to my own dive!”

Iwaizumi nips her hip, eyes still glued to the water. Kyoutani silently sits back up. Seconds stretch into minutes and when they wait there at the ten-minute mark, Iwaizumi grunts. The chain of Yahaba’s Spirit thinned into twine and then string and she couldn’t let this go on -

“She’s been down there a damn long time, and I can’t feel her any more,” the Vice Captain curses. “I’m going after her!”

Oikawa bars her with her arm. But it’s the expression on Oikawa’s face that stops her. Stone eyes could summon Yahaba with all their conviction.

But she soars up from the water a moment later transformed. Spirit finds her, holding her with the water that swells in an enormous wave above the ship. The air cackles above her, newfound lightning licking its new conductor, relishing in the young girl changed by her own belief. Slowly Spirit lets her go so that Yahaba smiles at them, brown locks sticking to the side of her face, before passing out entirely.

The next second, something else emerges from the water!

“I found a Clamperl!” Makki cheers victoriously, finally boarding the ship again!

When no one’s looking, Kyoutani lets a small smile light up the whole ocean.

--- ---

“So it’s me, Mattsun, Kin-chan and Kunimi,” Makki begins, cradled in Mattusn’s lap. The two wear either half of the Clamperl shell as a hat, shielding their eyes like a shade. “And we’re at a feast because we ran into each other in the garden, and we’re eating all these weirdly shaped foods, and then she tries a turnip,” she prattles off, shining.

Iwaizumi savagely stuffs her face with the Kingler leg in her hand. The whole thing stretches out as long as her leg. “Ah, don’t fight it, Iwa-chan. It’s already dead.” Iwaizumi throws her head back at her, snarling at the sight of her hand near her face. Oikawa’s calm demeanor, eyes closed, never falters. Her hand slowly drifts down to her side. “Ah, good Iwa-chan. Eat up!”

They huddle together in a spare room, bodies pressed together on cushions that line the dank space. A black sky melts into the waves, jostling them further into deep darkness. Somewhere far off, a crow cries.

“Mad-dog chan! So good of you to bring these lemons!” Oikawa exclaims, opening up one of Kyoutani’s jars.

“I poisoned them when you weren’t looking, Princess.”

“These are just dandy!” Oikawa takes the tiniest lemon that she stole out of Kyoutani’s stash, squeezing it for only a second. She places the used lemon, all dainty, on the table loaded with food before picking up a Kingler leb with only her index fingers and thumbs.

“You’re the worst kind of person,” Kyoutani spits in disgust.

“And Kin-chan says, ‘Wow, I sure hate turnips!’ It’s like she doesn’t even know!” Makki finishes, earning Oikawa’s spaced-out chuckle.

“Oi Okawa, tell a scary story,” Iwaizumi says between bites. Even eyes flutter up to the girl sitting next to her, digging for something layered under her expression of fake joy. Oikawa sits still for a moment, that smile still plastered to her expression. Iwaizumi pushes her knee with her own perhaps a little too aggressively.

“Ow, Iwa-chan! Always so strong for your size!” she quips, rubbing her good knee. “I have nothing for you all! For what could haunt my vision so? But I’m sure Kyoutani has some scary stuff to tell, doesn’t she? Every day must be a nightmare for you.”

The comment is a shade too dark for Oikawa’s usual vitriol. Concern comes alive in Iwaizumi’s chest, creeping along her ribcage. Luckily, Kyoutani rolls with her joke and senses nothing wrong.

“I know you don’t believe in me, Princess,” she begins, “but my visions have never once failed me. The last words my grandma told to my face was that my visions were whispered through Aoba Johsai Itself.” Yahaba curls her knees to her chest, the rest of her body drowned in her robes. “I personally think it’s what I get in exchange for losing my family.” Mattsun pulls Makki closer to her. “My last vision, in particular…” Kyoutani rubs her temples, a nerve pulsating there like a lightning bolt to her brain.

“I saw the world end.”

“Was it on fire? Did you see all the islands vanish before your very eyes?” Oikawa says without thinking. She vibrantly sees the sky slipping into the sea, everything collapsing upon itself so that all that’s left is one blue blob of crushed life -

Silence strangles the room. After a moment, Kyoutani replies. Her voice is a decibel above comprehension.

“Yes.”

Iwaizumi throws down the crab shell, shattering the silence. “Oikawa,” she whispers, breathless, “Talk to me.”

Standing up, Oikawa holds her hands in front of her, donning her facade smile. “Alright, everyone! That’s enough for tonight! You all worked hard, so please get a good rest before we do this all again tomorrow!” The dim light from above breaks upon her Haxorus armor, hurling teal shades like knives towards the shadows.

“Shittykawa,” she growls under her breath once everyone has left. “It’s stupid that I can’t help when you dodge me. What’d you see? Did the mark on your hand hurt when it happened? Speak to me,” she demands, voice grating to her own ears.

Her response is not one that she would expect.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa pleads in the lowest of tones, “will you hold me?” Iwaizumi twirls her towards her and sees fear in place of the one she l -

No words are wasted as she wraps her arms around the girl, tucking her arm under her neck, pledging safety in her embrace. Iwaizumi asks no questions as she draws the cover over them, nuzzling closer so that Oikawa can tune into her heartbeat and not the roar of waves fighting each other. For now, they pretend they are children and not warriors on the brink of the world’s war.

Her hand reaches out for her.

It seemed only a second had passed since that moment and now, when she struggles to find her feet in the pure darkness sheathing the outside world. Trudging onto the bow of the ship now, Oikawa shakes, shocked at the eerie silence consuming them. This is a time of day when nothing can be born, quick to rot in a dimension distilled from all others. No sound nor sight. Nothing.

“So it woke you up, too?” Iwaizumi grumbled, her voice groggy. “Something’s here.” Oikawa takes her hand without another second’s delay. The feeling of their fingers interlocking unfurls something in Oikawa far beyond intimacy.

“I’m not going to lose you,” she says, words each a cold slab nearly caught in her throat. Looking beyond, she sees landmasses sinking into the ocean for all the water deluging them. The rain starts the instant she sees them. By the time they sprint back to the hooded portion of the deck, they’ve already been soaked with the merciless drops slamming down.

The same instant finds the ocean’s heart beating out of control. Waves slosh dangerously high above their ship, forming walls that pound down upon the aged wood. Iwaizumi curses under her breath, crossing her arms over her face and peeking through the tiny space there to try to ascertain what beast possessed the sea. Rain pummels itself into sleet, each steel layer slapping the wooden boards of the ship. The two trails left over from training yesterday burst open with the hits.

The world slides away before Oikawa’s eyes. Iwaizumi screams something that Oikawa can’t hear over the wind whisking it away, tugging on her arms so hard a bruise will be left there. Oikawa unsheathes her swords, bending low into a crouch. With all of her faith, she lets go of Iwaizumi’s hand.

The next second, a shrill screech shoots across the ocean.
 
Hey! I'm here to a leave a review as one of the judges for the WUC contest. 8) Thanks for taking part, first of all! And with a non-Pokemon related fic, no less. It's always cool to see one of those floating around the section. I can't say I'm familiar with the Haikyuu anime, but that's all right since you said it's partly AU anyway.

I was curious to see some Pokemon names mentioned in the fic (Clamperl and Kingler, specifically) and I'm wondering if that's for URPG purposes - as in, you were aiming to catch those Pokemon with this fic? I don't have any complaints here in terms of the story itself, but that gives URPG participants a lot of leeway, not being required to write Pokemon fics. Which I think is pretty cool.

Anyway, you have an interesting, poetic writing style. The main downfall with a poetic writing style, however, is that it's quite easy to veer off into melodramatic prose or purple prose, which I do think the story does sometimes. This happens more near the beginning of the fic, particularly when you're describing the character's feelings/relationship with each other. Once more dialogue and characters are introduced, this becomes much less of an issue and the fic is easier to follow. My main suggestion would be to lay easy on the exclamation marks. I was brought out of the story whenever I saw one, and thought the impact of what was happening would have been greater if the exclamation mark wasn't there to blatantly point out that said thing was happening.

Not a lot happens in the fic, but I personally like reading about mundane, everyday activities being made interesting, so it made for an interesting read. Exploring a training method to help strengthen the Spirit was a big part of this. I'm assuming the Spirit is a Haikyuu thing, or the "fantasy" part of the AU. At any rate, I was able to follow what it meant without knowing anything about the fandom, which attests to how well written that part of the fic was. I was also a fan of the dialogue itself - all of it was cute and carefree, and by the end, the scene where Oikawa and Iwaizumi embrace made my heart melt. :3

Overall, this was a well written read that introduced me to the Haikyuu world, and I actually kind of want to learn more about Oikawa and Iwaizumi now. They sound absolutely adorable.
 
Well, first things first, congrats on getting best short prose/poetry! This was my favorite story out of the group that I judged, and boy does it deserve the win. Let’s get into the review.

First of all, not a ton goes on story wise in this piece. We’re shown what seem to be snippets of a day of training focused on something called Spirit, and while the story lacks a major cohesive plot, it is still an excellent read, and clearly a character driven piece. This is by no means a bad thing, but the lack of an overarching story means I can’t say much about this area.

On to a category I’m downright floored by. The world of Digs, Dives is a beautiful one. You do a fantastic job of describing the boat and the ocean around Oikawa and Iwaizumi is brilliantly detailed without using too much wordy description and feels very much alive. Everything all fits together excellently and truly makes me feel as if I could have been there.

Next up is another category this story excels at. We get a lot of characterization for 3.5k words, and all of it is amazing. Oikawa and Iwaizumi have a lot of visible development and background that all meshes well with the rest of the story, and it makes them feel like real people with real lives and real experiences. Kudos to for making the characters not out of ink and paper, but flesh and blood.

Of course, all of this is complemented by your beautifully poetic writing style. It has just the right mix of hard detail and description and descriptive language to really drive the story home. It doesn’t hurt that the story starts out with a bang, too, and the first sentence draws you in immediately.

Now that I’m done gushing, I do have a few complaints. While they were few, I noticed (at most) two or three moments where your descriptive language turned into purple prose and became too wordy.

All in all, I loved this story, and I hope to see more like it from you
 
Hey! I know I commented before, but I judged this for the awards and thought I'd leave some more detailed, post-awards feedback. I've also got a banner coming your way for participating in the WUC, which was delayed because our art contributors have been so busy, woops. XD Sorry 'bout that! Anyway, sorry for anything I repeat in my comments here.

The plot is simple and not too original, to be honest. The story in its entirety essentially follows the growing relationship between the two main characters, Oikawa and Iwaizumi. The two also train with a group of other people to hone a power called the Spirit, but this part of the short story seems important to part of a larger work this is part of, so I'm sure the plot is expanded on in other parts of said story.

The power called the Spirit was an interesting read for me, though considering this is a crossover into the Haikyuu fandom, I was kind of hoping to get a better glimpse into that fandom's world. Now I know the Spirit is your own creation and not something simply taken from the anime, which is cool and I'd like to know more! Again, though, I'm sure it's expanded on in the bigger story. Guess that means I'll have to read it? ;D

The characters are super adorable when interacting. They also have a lot of depth to them, as even in this short prose piece, a lot of emotions, beliefs, and personal thoughts of the characters are explored and brought to light through both the narration and dialogue.

I'm a fan of poetic and rambly, stream of consciousness writing styles. The fic could be hard to follow at times because of it, but overall, the style was poignant, emotional, had a good flow to it, and the pacing was spot on as well.

There weren't any noticeable errors. However, the excessive use of exclamation points makes parts of the fic come off as melodramatic to me, and that's a punctuation thing.

Congrats on the award! Even if I seem a bit harsh here, it was well deserved. ;D
 
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