TEEN: Dragon Ball Universe (#13: 14 October 2016)

[Time Breaker]

A non-Pokémon fanfic inspired by the popular manga series by Akira Toriyama and the anime adaptation by Toei Animation! Instead of the story you're used to of Raditz to Buu (or Pilaf to Omega Shenron for some), this is a completely original story featuring many characters from the original timeline, as well as brand-new ones.
Chapters contain episodes, and episodes are published weekly (first hosted on Kanzenshuu, hence this topic starting with 9 episodes).
Final note: This is rated Teen for violence and blood. There is no foul language here.

Introduction
#1 (01 July 2016)
#2 (08 July 2016)
#3 (15 July 2016)
#4 (22 July 2016)
#5 (29 July 2016)
#6 (05 August 2016)
#7 (12 August 2016)
#8 (19 August 2016)
#9 (26 August 2016)
#10 (02 September 2016)
#11 (09 September 2016)
#S1 (16 September 2016)
#S2 (23 September 2016)
#S3 (30 September 2016)
#12 (07 October 2016)
#13 (14 October 2016)

 

[AceTrainer14]

Hey there. First of all, just wanted to say welcome to the forum, hope you are enjoying your time here! Just thought I'd point out that it would be easier to put the chapters in separate posts if you wanted, as it would ensure that readers would know when a new chapter has been posted. Also, it might help to put them chronologically just so people can read them in the correct order. These are just my suggestions, no rules or anything around it, but thought I would share my thoughts anyway.

 

[Time Breaker]

I'm planning on doing the same thing I do on the main forum this is hosted on, which is make a post down here every time I release one, and then update the first post with it. And the main reason I put them in reverse order is so people don't have to scroll all the way down to get to the new one, but I could probably reverse them. Thanks for the advice, though!

 

[Time Breaker]

Bumping to let you know that #11 has been added.

 

[Kharixi]

Spoiler

Frieza angrily grinded his teeth at the mere thought of this.

Ground his teeth.

I will crush anyone who decides to become "stronger" than I do.

This sentence makes no sense.

And what will become of Vegeta, with his pride now damaged?

Damaged? I'd say shattered.

With the battle over, every one of the Z-Fighters had exhauted all of their power.

Exhausted.

Sorry if that sounded rude...

 

[Time Breaker]

Sorry. But you make more typos than I do, for the record.

 

[Time Breaker]

Bumping once again because #S1 has been added.

 

[Kharixi]

Spoiler

These sore offenders have disgraced the Frieza Army by killing our master!

Just thought I'd mention that "disgraced" isn't as harsh a word as I would use, but y'know, whatever you prefer.

 

[Time Breaker]

Spoiler

Just thought I'd mention that "disgraced" isn't as harsh a word as I would use, but y'know, whatever you prefer.

Spoiler

The Ginyus are reaaaaally loyal to Frieza, thus they disgraced his army and name by killing him (yeah, it's not supposed to make sense).

 

[Time Breaker]

#13 released. Forgot to add the link yesterday.

 

[Bigdbigd03]

Why no cursing?

 

[Time Breaker]

Why no cursing?

Because it's not what I do. Did you read any of it, though?

 

[Bigdbigd03]

Not yet. I'm writing my own story at this time. It is censored the way the FCC has Television. Which means I will use some indecent words.

 

[AceTrainer14]

Under our rules, you cannot post a thread solely to link to another website. As such, I am locking this thread - please read our rules before posting here again, and contact me if you have any further inquiries.