Mafia Fruit Bowl Mafia - Endgame: That's the Last Strawberry! (Vegetable Victory) 29/01/2016

[Snowy]

Spoiler: players

1. @Zexy
2. @TheCapsFan
3. @Slife
4. @Kyriaki
5. @IGN
6. @Pikochu
7. @leetic
8. @Pinball Wizard
9. @wry_hermes
10. @Kakashi Hatake
11. @Noivern
12. @Elieson
13. @Etrian Oddity
14. @dylanpiera

@Maniacal Engineer @AussieEevee

Night 0: Food Fight!!!

For the residents of ME's Kitchen, the night began just like any other. The fruits rained supreme over the produce drawer, while the vegetables were cornsidered second class citizens.
Day after day, the vegetables were discarded in favor of their fruity counterparts. To pass their thyme, the vegetable began building monuments, like the Great Food Pyramids of Pita, and the Leaning Tower of Pizza.
Tired of being beeten on by their seedy overlords, a group of vegetables began an underground resistance movement, known as the Villainous Vegetables. These vegetables strove to strike fear in to the cores of their enemies.
In order to bamboozle the fruits, the vegetables sprayed the air with eggcessive pesticides, rendering them unable to identify who was fruit, and who was vegetable.

The War of the Foods had begun.

Phase End: 19/01/2016 02:00 AWST / 6PM GMT

Please confirm when you receive your PM.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

Spoiler

1. @Zexy
2. @TheCapsFan
3. @Slife
4. @Kyriaki
5. @IGN
6. @Pikochu
7. @leetic
8. @Pinball Wizard
9. @wry_hermes
10. @Kakashi Hatake
11. @Noivern
12. @Elieson
13. @Etrian Oddity
14. @dylanpiera
@AussieEevee @Maniacal Engineer

Day 1: Blowing Away A Raspberry

Having pre-peared the stage, the Villainous Vegetables now committed their first major act of upheaval.
In order to sow fear into the hearts of their enemies, they began a murderous rampage, starting with an unexpected twist.

The fruits awoke to discover one of their own had been mercilessly eggstirminated during the previous evening.

Dear Maniacal Engineer,

Spoiler

View: https://youtube.com/watch?v=8dDXgGhaI70
​

Raspberry! There's only one man who would dare give me the raspberry!

You are the raspberry. You contain roughly 40% of a person's daily allotment of Vitamin C, and are also slang for making a flapping noise with your tongue and mouth. Said colloquial term seems to have originated in the Cockney dialect of English, and was originally called "raspberry tart." Some genius decided to shorten it to raspberry instead of just tart.
Interestingly enough, the word "raspberry" likely originates from the French word "raspise," which means a sweet rose colored wine. What this has to do with sticking out one's tongue and making a flapping noise, I have no idea.
As part of your multiculturalism, Scotland is famous for growing raspberries and in the late 1950s, it would ship raspberries to London on a train called the Raspberry Special.
Raspberries come in four colors: red, purple, gold, or black. Unfortunately, as much as flavors would like to tell you otherwise, blue raspberry isn't a thing. I do have to wonder, though, why black raspberries aren't just blackberries, but I'm just rambling at this point.

In any case, as per your usual mafia game meta in The War Room, you are the throwaway redshirt character. You are meant to increase the drama and the steaks at the beginning of the game, and you do so in your usual manner, by dying. However, in death you become more powerful than anyone can possibly imagine and gain the powers of the Host. As such, you win if everyone has a good time and laughs at your puns. All things considered, I think that second part is an impossible win condition...

"What's this?!" demanded one fruit.
"Those nasty vegetables have killed one of us!" exclaimed another.
"I'm getting sick of these dead-beets," sighed another fruit.
"They're actually not dead yet," corrected yet another.
"Well then, let's get right to the root of the issue and deal with that, shall we?" suggested the first fruit.
"But who should be target?" asked the second fruit.

IT IS NOW DAY 1: Phase Ends 21/1/16 at 2:00am AWST

PS: Yes, I somehow managed to find a way to die on Night 0...again.

wry_hermes has not confirmed receiving her role yet. If she does not confirm within 24 hours of this update, she will be subbed out.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

Spoiler

1. @Zexy
2. @TheCapsFan
3. @Slife
4. @Kyriaki
5. @IGN
6. @Pikochu
7. @leetic
8. @Pinball Wizard
9. @wry_hermes
10. @Kakashi Hatake
11. @Noivern
12. @Elieson
13. @Etrian Oddity
14. @dylanpiera
@AussieEevee @Maniacal Engineer

Night 1: Lettuce Proseed!

The fruits gathered in bunches to discuss the death of their friend, the Raspberry.
Several interesting claims were made regarding alignment and there were even a few roll claims.
As the day dragged on, however, it seemed as though no results would be produced. Everybody was suspicious, but nobody wanted to cast the first stone.
Towards the end of the day, however, a list of inactive and suspicious users was compiled.
They chose to focus on one player who never even bothered to post in the thread. His silence and lack of participation were not contributing to the welfare of the town and were viewed as a means of hiding something.
This particular player had a history of silence that, to date, had occasionally served him well. However, in recent thymes, it had actually been his downfall, so it was once again, and this time, it cost him dearly.
As the fruits placed him on the chopping block, he shouted: "Viva La Resistance!" and was no more...

Dear Etrian Oddity,

Spoiler

It's not easy being green.

You are Lettuce, a descendant of the great Caesars of the Romaine Empire! You're the head and the heart of the vegetable mafia, and that's just the tip of the Iceberg. Still, in public, you've vowed to turnover a new leaf and start your life over again. A pity nobody actually beleafs you...

Because people with gluten free or low carb diets tend to use you as a bread substitute, you are the Roll blocker...err Roleblocker. Every night, you may PM the hosts one of the players to target and their Night actions, assuming they have any, will be prevented. Lettuce proceed with caution!

You are allied with the Villainous Vegetables and win when the Fantastic Fruits have been sliced and diced or this is unavoidable.

Spoiler

Etrian Oddity was lynched. He was Lettuce, allied with the Villainous Vegetables.

The Town celebrated the fruits of their labors, but night time was coming, and the remaining mafiosos were standing ready to turn the tables on the fruits and dish out just desserts.

IT IS NOW NIGHT 1: Phase Ends 22/1/16 at 2:00am AWST.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

Spoiler

1. @Zexy
2. @TheCapsFan
3. @Slife
4. @Kyriaki
5. @IGN
6. @Pikochu
7. @leetic
8. @Pinball Wizard
9. @wry_hermes
10. @Kakashi Hatake
11. @Noivern
12. @Elieson
14. @dylanpiera
@AussieEevee @Maniacal Engineer

DANGER: DO NOT READ AT WORK!
Elieson, I'm looking at you!

Day 2: Plum Outta Luck

The fruits celery-brated their victory late into the night. Several of them ended up getting sloshed and drunkenly stumbled home.
One such fruit was the mango, the self proclaimed "King of the Fruits." Usually light on his feet, the Mango was ordinarily berry entertaining. Tonight, however, his performance was compromised.
As such, he didn't notice when someone crept up behind him until it was too late...

Dear Pinball Wizard,

Spoiler

Don't expect mangoes when you plant papayas.

The King of the Fruits, you are the Mango! Considered to be the symbol of love in India, it is no surprise that you are also a very good dancer. After all, someone that quick on their feet is also quick with another's heart. Your favorite dance is the tango, but dancing is not your only talent. In some cultures it is believed that munching on mango buds will lend to sweetness of the voice, which also makes you an excellent singer. It is also believed that mango trees can grant wishes, which gives you the skills to be a wonderful magician.

Due to your numerous theatrical talents, you are the Performer. Each Night, you may PM the hosts a target for whom you will perform that evening. Said target will be so enraptured by your performance that they will be unable to perform their action that evening, assuming they have one. Who dares to tango with this mango?

You are allied with the Fantastic Fruits and win when the Villainous Vegetables have been sliced and diced.

Spoiler

Pinball Wizard was murdered. He was the Mango, allied with the Fantastic Fruits.

-------------------------

Having been left behind at the party, the plum was attempting to get into the restroom. However, when he got there, the door was locked. Desperate to get in and releaf himself, the plum banged on the door.
A voice came from within.
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?" asked the plum.
"Interupting knife," replied the voice.
"Interup-," began the plum.

Unfortunately, he never finished his sentence, as the bathroom door was flung open and a knife was buried into his core.

The assailant washed his hands in the bathroom sink and walked away, laughing maniacally...

Dear Slife,

Spoiler

Prune Juice Sets You Free!

You are plum loco! Uh, I mean you are the Plum. Southern expressions aside, you are a purple fruit that enjoys working with lead pipes. You are actually part of the same family as roses, and there are over 200 varieties of plums. I would say more, but I'm trying to prune the length of these role PMs.

You have a very high fiber content, and prune juice is very good for digestion and dealing with constipation. As such, you are the Party Pooper, which is just a humorous way to say that you are the Commuter. Two times during the game, you may PM the hosts at night to say that you are commuting. If you do so, you may not post in the thread or have any outside communication for the entire night phase, since you are locked in the bathroom. However, you will be protected from all night actions that would have been used on you...probably because the bathroom door is made of solid steel, or something. Hopefully this ability will Flushter your enemies.

You are allied with the Fantastic Fruits and win when the Villainous Vegetables have been sliced and diced.

Spoiler

Slife was murdered. He was the Plum, allied with the Fantastic Fruits.

------------------------

Elsewhere, a laser beam fired harmlessly into the night air.
------------------------

The following morning, the fruits discovered that two of their own had been murdered.

"Who could have done such a thing?!"

IT IS NOW DAY 2: Phase ends 24/1/16 at 2:00am AWST. AussieEevee will be posting the update text, since that will be my Sabbath.

 

[Snowy]

Spoiler

1. @Zexy
2. @TheCapsFan
4. @Kyriaki
5. @IGN
6. @Pikochu
7. @leetic
9. @wry_hermes
10. @Kakashi Hatake
11. @Noivern
12. @Elieson
14. @dylanpiera
@AussieEevee @Maniacal Engineer

Standard Warning: DO NOT READ THIS UPDATE AT WORK. THIS UPDATE IS LITERALLY NSFW.

Night 2: Night of the Living Bread!

Spoiler: language

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ik2-68WYE84
​

Despite the two tragic deaths the night before, the fruits remained unshaken. They continued to muddle through and attempt to locate the vile vegetables hiding amongst them.
However, given that they had already located and beeten one of the vegetables, the fruits de-cidered to attempt a different course of action, figuring that the vegetables would turnip sooner or later.
The fruits punched a hole through the 4th wall and put the host on the chopping block. They eggspected to gain bonus abilities by locating this Easter Egg, but they forgot something in their haste.
The cohost is a Troll, and he writes the flavor text.

Dear AussieEevee,

Spoiler

'A loaf of bread,' the Walrus said, 'is what we chiefly need: Pepper and vinegar besides are very good indeed.'

Drum roll please...You are Bread! You are the bread and butter of any food based humor, and you come in very handy during jams. You are always the first in line for morning roll call, since you are an early riser. You have a rye sense of humor, and your favorite shoes are your loafers; they keep your feet nice and toasty.
Sometimes, though, you try to think too quickly, and your ideas are only half-baked.
You occasionally have a crusty personality, but you are fairly easy to butter up, and once someone gets on your good side, you sprinkle them with favors.
You have your secrets, which you share with only your closest friends, and even then it's on a knead to know basis.
You can be rather frugal, balancing your checkbook to the last pumpernickel, mostly because you live paycheck to paycheck and knead the dough.
As far as foods go, you find yourself sandwiched in the starches, but you are made from grains, which are plants, just like fruits and vegetables. As such, you have your place of honor at the table.
Alright, while I am on a roll with the buns, I had better stop because I get a feeling that if I tell one more bread joke, I'm toast.

With regards to your particular roll, you sit around and do absolutely nothing, making you the Loafer. This means that, in spite of being a valid target,there is no bonus for lynching or night killing you. It essentially wastes the phase. What a crumby thing to do!

Technically, you are allied with the deceased Maniacal Engineer, which means that you share his impossible win conditions and have to put up with his constant Trolling and obnoxious puns...my condolences.

Spoiler

AussieEevee was lynched. He was the Host. The game is now over! Nothing happened.

Spoiler: Batter luck next time!

IT IS NOW NIGHT 2: Phase Ends 25/1/16 at 2:00am AWST.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

Spoiler

1. @Zexy
2. @TheCapsFan
4. @Kyriaki
5. @IGN
6. @Pikochu
7. @leetic
9. @wry_hermes
10. @Kakashi Hatake
11. @Noivern
12. @Elieson
14. @dylanpiera
@AussieEevee @Maniacal Engineer

DANGER: CONTAINS A TOXIC ALLERGEN!

Day 3: Nuttier than a Carrot Cake

Hidden behind the curtains of the massive Trolling, a confrontation had started the previous day.
That confrontation was about to come to a head.
Two players squared off as they met, face to face at last.
The first player was an orange looking fellow with strange proportions, while the second was a rounded hourglass wearing a top hat, monocle, and riding gloves.

"I know what you are," said the first player, "you're a serial killer!"
"Bravo," said the second player, sarcastically while clapping his gloved hands, "what tipped you off? The fact that I'm nuts?"
"You overplayed your hand," said the first player, "and now you must be elemomaded!"
"Surely we could work something out," said the second player, hiding a dangerous weapun behind his back, "after all, we have similar goals."
"Not a chance!" exclaimed the first player, "you're too dangerous to let live."
"Very well," sighed the second player, "you've forced my hand, but before we start the bloodshed, might I axe you a question?"
"Wha-?" began the first player, but was interrupted as the serial killer withdrew an axe from behind his back and started hacking him to pieces.
"Carrot in hell!" snarled the serial killer, an evil expression in his monocled eye.
He turned and began to walk away, whistling a strange tune and swinging the bloody axe like a baton.

Dear TheCapsFan,

Spoiler

Carrot Role PM

What did the carrot say to the wheat? Lettuce rest, I'm feeling beet.

You are the Carrot. No, not Carrot Top, just a plain old Carrot. Leave the jokes to ME.
On second thought, you probably shouldn't do that either...
You are an esteamed member of the vegetable mafia, and your style of communication is short and to the point. You like to get down to the root of the issue and work backwards from there.

There have been myths about carrots improving people's night vision since World War II, when the British claimed that their pilots were able to intercept German bombers during night raids by eating lots of carrots. Unfortunately, while the Germans were fooled by this propaganda, so was the British public, and thus the misconception was born!

Due to your legendary night vision, you can gain information for your team during the Night phases. As such you are the Role Cop. Every night you may PM the hosts a player's name and you will receive their role.

You are allied with the Villainous Vegetables and win when the Fantastic Fruits have been sliced and diced or this is unavoidable.

Spoiler

TheCapsFan was murdered. He was the Carrot, allied with the Villainous Vegetables.

As the first player lay dying, he withdrew a gun from his leafy hair.
"I might be dying," he said, "but I'm taking you with me. Viva La Resistance!"

The first player shot the serial killer and cracked the shell casing once and for all.
The serial killer collapsed onto his knees, a strange buttery substance leeking from the gunshot wound.
"So this is how it ends," he said, sadly, "there was still so much I wanted to do in my life, but, alas, I was asalted before my thyme..."

Dear Zexy,

Spoiler

Peanuts Role PM:

I can't drink these! These are nuts!

Good grief! You are Peanuts. You are a gentleman and a very dapper dresser, always wearing your top hat and monocle, and you've occasionally been seen wearing riding gloves and carrying a walking stick.

What most people don't realize is that beneath that fancy exterior lies a deadly psychopath. Your fancy white gloves cover the permanent bloodstains on your hands. You are certifiably nuts and you've killed people just for the heck of it, in spite of your victim's attempts to butter you up. You are capable of murdering someone simply by walking into the room and looking at them funny.
You are one of the most evil substances on the planet, due to your toxicity, deadliness, and dastardly behavior. Of course, it should come as no surprise, therefore, to find out that ME is addicted to peanuts.

Because of your nuttiness and the fact that you are a deadly allergen, you are the Cereal Serial Killer. Each night, you may PM the hosts with a victim to kill.
You are allied with yourself because nobody can stand within 50 meters of you without dying due to allergies, and you win when you are the last player alive or when this is unavoidable.

Spoiler

Zexy was murdered. He was the Peanut, a Cereal Serial Killer.

IT IS NOW DAY 3: Phase Ends 27/1/16 at 2:00am AWST.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

Sort of Announcement

I now have a non-private Skype account: Malevolent Extraterrestrial
malevolent.extraterrestrial

Hooray for ME!!

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

Spoiler

4. @Kyriaki
5. @IGN
6. @Pikochu
7. @leetic
9. @wry_hermes
10. @Kakashi Hatake
11. @Noivern
12. @Elieson
14. @dylanpiera
@AussieEevee @Maniacal Engineer

WARNING: THIS POST MAY BE NSFW.
Just dew yourself a favor and don't read it at work...

Night 3: The Persian iDoctor

Encoreaged by the downfall of two major threats, the fruits seemed content to let the day pass without much inseedent.
However, not wanting to totally waste the phase, a couple of players gathered for discussion.
They pointed the blame one way, then they pointed it another way. It was all berry confusing, and there was a rapid turnover of votes.

As the day came to an end, however, the fruits placed one of their own on the chopping block. In spite of attempting to warn the players of the consequences of their actions, they proseeded with the eggsecution anyway.

Dear Noivern,

Spoiler

The cure for Apple is not cost-cutting. The cure for Apple is to innovate its way out of its current predicament.

You are the apple of my eye, the Apple! You occasionally get slightly too sauced on cider. In spite of your occasional crabby moods, you are generally rather cheerful, though occasionally you experience rapid turnovers of emotion, mostly due to your drinking habits. In spite of being an iconic part of U.S. culture, the only apple native to the U.S. is the crabapple. Typical. Additionally, the number one exporter of apples is China. That said, when looking at statistics such as this, we must always compear apples to apples. In this case, it's as easy as pie! The apple is the most popular fruit grown in the United States, and, thanks to John Chapman, better known in American Folklore as Johnny Appleseed, many apples not native to America were introduced in the U.S.

Due to a proverb, as well as the many medicinal benefits of apples, you are the Doctor. Each Night, you may PM the hosts a player whom you want to protect. That player will be immune to night kills for that phase. How do you like them apples?

You are allied with the Fantastic Fruits and win when the Villainous Vegetables have been sliced and diced.

Spoiler

Noivern was killed. He was the Apple, allied with the Fantastic Fruits.

As the knife fell, the players hoped he would Regenerate, but it was not to be. The Apple of their eye had fallen, and now the mafia had free rain to asalt Whoever they wanted whenever they wanted to, but it wasn't over yet.
While the fruits were still grieving for their fallen comrade, the heard a loud crash.
Maniacal Engineer drunkenly stumpled into the kitchen and reached into the fruit bowl. He grabbed a peach and began eating it as he stumbled out of the kitchen. More crashes and broken glass ensued, along with lots of unseemly swearing.

Dear dylanpiera,

Spoiler

Life is better than death, I believe, if only because it is less boring, and because it has fresh peaches in it.

You are Princess Peach! You pop up quite a bit throughout history, which befits the Chinese symbol of longevity and good luck.Your favorite month is August, and you are traditionally given by someone to friends that they like, originating the expression "you're a real peach." You are mentioned in literature as early as 79 CE, and were once known as "The Persian Apple." You are the third most popular fruit grown in the United States, losing only to apples and orange. Orange you glad I didn't say bananas?

You are also a well known Nintendo Princess, being a main character in the Mario franchise. While not the most popular of the Nintendo Princesses, coming in 7th on TheTopTens' list of Top Ten Best Nintendo Princesses, you are nonetheless an iconic part of the Mario series and are well loved by your people in the Mushroom Kingdom. As such, you are the Beloved Princess. If you are killed at any point in the game, the next Day phase is skipped, since the Town will be too grieved by your death to do anything but mourn.

You are allied with the Fantastic Fruits and win when the Villainous Vegetables have been sliced and diced.

Spoiler

dylanpiera was modkilled. He was the Peach, allied with the Fantastic Fruits.

Ordinarily, the fruits would be so striken by grief that they would only be able to mourn during the following day, but given the nature of this death, they were more horrified and disgusted with the slovenly engineer in whose kitchen they reside.
Meanwhile, the mafia was eggstatic! This was the chance of a lifetime to ketchup to the fruits and finally eggsact the revenge that was so justly deserved.

IT IS NOW NIGHT 3: Phase ends 28/1/16 at 2:00am AWST.
Raisins for the Modkill will be discussed in the aftergame. Needless to say, I do try to be fair, so Beloved will not be activated as a result of this Modkilling. As such Day 4 will NOT be skipped.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

Spoiler

4. @Kyriaki
5. @IGN
6. @Pikochu
7. @leetic
9. @wry_hermes
10. @Kakashi Hatake
12. @Elieson
@AussieEevee @Maniacal Engineer

Day 4: Well that Backfired!/The Banana Split

Having lost two prominent members of their society, including their Doctor, the previous phase, some of the fruits simply cowered in fear. However, undaunted by the potential danger, one fruit went about his business, patrolling the pearimeter and attempting to keep the public safe. Unfortunately, along his beeten patrol root, he was ambushed by the mafia, who had finally gotten sick of his monkey business. He tried to fight, but ended up slipping on his own peel. This gave the mafia the advantage they needed, and they sliced the Banana in two. After all, without the Doctor to protect him, the Banana just couldn't cut it.

Dear IGN,

Spoiler

Always take a banana to a party!

You are Bananas! No, I don't mean that you're crazy. You are literal bananas. You are a fantastic source of potassium, and you have quite a bit of entertainment value. Throughout the ages, people have used bananas as fake phones, fake guns, and other interesting items. You have quite a bit of appeal, and speaking of, your peel has been used in many cartoon gags as a means of tripping someone.

What do you call two banana peels lying on the floor?
A pair of slippers!

Due to your vaguely gun-like shape, it has been decided that you are the Cop. Every night, you may PM the hosts with a player's name and we will reveal their allignment. Hopefully, this role will put a monkey wrench in those dastardly vegetable's plans!

You are allied with the Fantastic Fruits and win when all of the Villainous Vegetables have been sliced and diced.

Spoiler

IGN was murdered. He was the Banana, allied with the Fantastic Fruits.

---------------

Elsewhere, another player was on a war path. Having been forced into silence the previous two Day phases, he was pissed off and ready to vent off some steam. This someone glared at a yellow citrus fruit and said "I have consalted with sauces that indisputably tell me that you're a vegetable!"

The player fired a laser beam at the yellow citrus fruit. Unfortunately, one bad apple ruined the bunch because the citrus fruit was rigged to Explode. When the lemon was shot, it set off a chain reaction that also engulfed the pumpkin that had accused her.

Dear Kyriaki,

Spoiler

When Life gives you lemons, ask him why he is giving you lemons and not joining your mafia game.

You are the Lemon! No, this does not mean that you are a dud, as a matter of fact, you will always come to your friends' ade whenever you possibly can. You are nature's top source of citric acid, which makes you the most corrosive fruit. You also make a first rate insect repellant, due to a compound known as azadirachtin, which is secreted by your skin. Incidentally, you also contain a high amount of Vitamin C, which is used to stave off scurvy. To this date, the British Navy requires it's vessels to carry enough lemons so that each sailor can have an ounce of lemon juice every day. That's one Imperial ounce, not one U.S. ounce. 1 U.S. fluid ounce = 1.04084 Imperial fluid ounces. Speaking of the U.S. 100% of the United States' lemon crop is produced in California and Arizona. Lastly, it is also a popular school experiment to attach electrodes to a lemon and use it as a battery to power a lightbulb or small motor.

You contain a high amount of citric acid and ascorbic acid which contain electrolytes when dissolved in liquid. When combined with the metal in bullets this makes you a lead-acid battery. Lead-acid batteries have an explosion risk, as such you are the Bomb. When you are killed, you will randomly kill one of the people that was responsible for your death. (If only one person is directly responsible for your death, you will kill that person.) Bomb's away!

You are allied with the Fantastic Fruits and win when the Villainous Vegetables have been sliced and diced.

Spoiler

Kyriaki was murdered. She was the Lemon, allied with the Fantastic Fruits.

Dear Elieson,

Spoiler

What pumpkin?
You see no pumpkin, and frankly it is hard to imagine there ever was a pumpkin, in plain sight or otherwise.

You are the Pumpkin! You enjoy squashing your enemies and are slightly out of your gourd.
You are traditionally associated with autumn and are often used for Jack-O-Lanterns with intricate carvings for the autumnal holiday. That's when people light a fire under your ass.

Due to your ass being subjected to fire on countless occasions, you have gained a few interesting abilities. As such, you are not just any old pumpkin, you are the Flying Pumpkin that Shoots Laser Beams out of its Ass. Yes, this is actually a listed role on mafiascum, and ME thought it would be amusing to include it here, since it is oddly appropriate. Your role has two abilities. Every night, there is a 25% chance of you being Bulletproof. You may also PM the hosts at Night to either vigilante kill a player, with 75% chance of success or take aim at a player, which will give you a 100% chance of killing your target if they are Mafia or a 25% chance of killing them if they're Town during the following night phase.

You are allied with the Fantastic Fruits and win when the Villainous Vegetables have been sliced and diced.

Spoiler

Elieson was killed by the Bomb. He was the Pumpkin, allied with the Fantastic Fruits.

The mafia laughed at the irony of this particular bombshell. Two major threats elemonaded by one simple blunder, and they were about to spoil the mood even further...
"Vitamin C you later, fruitcakes!"

IT IS NOW DAY 4: Phase ends 30/1/16 at 2:00am AWST. Today is a LILO Day under most circumstances. There is a slight chance it could only be MILO, depending on events which could possibly occur during Night 4.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

Spoiler

1. @Zexy
2. @TheCapsFan
3. @Slife
4. @Kyriaki
5. @IGN
6. @Pikochu
7. @leetic
8. @Pinball Wizard
9. @wry_hermes
10. @Kakashi Hatake
11. @Noivern
12. @Elieson
13. @Etrian Oddity
14. @dylanpiera
@AussieEevee @Maniacal Engineer

Endgame: That's the Last Strawberry! (Vegetable Victory)

For the final thyme, the fruits attempted to weed out the remaining mafioso.
There were accusations flying, desperate claims, and counterclaims.
Watching the chaos, the last of the vegetables smiled at the confusion he had sown. He was now reaping the benefits of his efforts and would be rewarded with a bountiful harvest.

With three votes against her, the Strawberry was placed onto the chopping block. She did not go out quietly. She yelled at the other players, milking the moment for all it was worth. Nonetheless, her fate was sealed with no chances for an appeel.

Dear wry_hermes,

Spoiler

I suppose you're wondering why I called this meeting. As you all know by now, we had an excellent dessert for dinner tonight, ice cream and frozen strawberries. About an hour ago, I, I sent Whitaker to the pantry to bring me another portion. He came back with the ice cream, alright, but he said, 'sir, there ain't no more strawberries.'

You are the Strawberry. You are a rather seedy character, but most people find you to be berry sweet. You blend in well with your fellow fruits and are certainly popular among your pears. As a result, you know a lot of juicy secrets about your friends.

However, you caused much trouble for the crew of the USS Caine, as their commanding officer, Lt. Commander Queeg seemed to be obsessed with you. Don't be overly disconcerted, though, the man was a bit of an oddball, and ended up being relieved of duty. I guess you can't have your strawberry shortcake and eat it too.

You are one of the more flavorful characters in this game, but unfortunately, taste doesn't count for much in terms of abilities. Because of that and the fact that strawberry is also an ice cream flavor, you are Vanilla which means that you have no special abilities or powers besides your vote. Use it well.

You are allied with the Fantastic Fruits and win when the Villainous Vegetables have been sliced and diced.

Spoiler

wry_hermes was lynched. She was the Strawberry, allied with the Fantastic Fruits.

"No..." gasped the last remaining fruit, "what have I done?!"
"You've ensured my victory!" sneered the evil vegetable, "and now it is time for you to die as well!"

The fruit ran over to his work bench, desperately scrambling to grab one of his inventions, but they all slipped from his grasp, and he was left grasping at straws as the vegetable approached.
The last fruit was hacked to bits, leaving behind nothing but a bunch of worthless machines and a half empty bottle of vodka.

Dear Kakashi Hatake,

Spoiler

California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.

Knock knock!
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

You are the orange! You have a slight drinking problem, and your friends may find you slightly annoying at times, but you don't let that bother you. You are a mad scientist and a genius, and you revel in your eccentricities. You create many interesting contraptions that can help your friends, which is probably why they find you appealing.

When orange juice and vodka are combined, the result is a Screwdriver. As such you are the Inventor. You have invented the following items:

Spoiler

Bulletproof Peel:
This peel is made out of the latest in bulletproof materials. However, it is useless if simply held. Consumed on use.

Spoiler

TM09 Bullet Seed:
Bullets made from Recycled seeds. They are completely harmless without a gun, however. Consumed on use.

Spoiler

Potato Gun:
A weapon made from potatoes. It is capable of firing small projectiles at fast velocities. It appears to be unloaded, however. Consumed on use.

Spoiler

Corn Cob Pipe:
A device made from the husks of a fallen corn stalk. Perhaps capable of sending smoke signals to someone.

Spoiler

Juicer:
A mechanical device capable of checking whether or not someone is capable of producing juice. It is somewhat fragile and only has two uses, however.

You may not use these items yourself, rather you must pass them to people in order for them to be used. You may pass only one item per person, but you may pass as many of the items as you want at a time.

You are allied with the Fantastic Fruits and win when the Villainous Vegetables have been sliced and diced.

Spoiler

Kakashi Hatake was murdered. He was the Orange, allied with the Fantastic Fruits.

The vegetable then turned he gaze on the last player, who was attempting to hide behind the fruit bowl.
"I have no beef with you," said the vegetable, "I've weeded out all the fruits, so you are free to go."

Dear Pikochu,

Spoiler

“Anything is good if it's made of chocolate.”

What it is that most people other than AussieEevee love? That's right, chocolate! You are chocolate! Wait, wasn't this a fruit bowl mafia?

Well, it just so happens that you can be combined with fruit, and even nuts. You will always be around, as no one wants to outlaw chocolate... There would be a public outrage!

As such, you are the independent survivor. You win if you are still alive by the end of the game.

BUT if you are killed, you provide a penalty to the side that killed you.
If you are killed in a lynch, you will prevent a lynch in the following day.
If you are killed in a nightkill, you will prevent the nightkill in the following night.

Spoiler

Pikochu has won the game! He was chocolate, the Independent Survivor.

"But you," asked the chocolate, "who are you?"

"I am the greatest vegetable of all times!" exclaimed the vegetable.

Dear leetic,

Spoiler

An onion can make people cry, but there has never been a vegetable invented to make them laugh.

You are the Onion, a villain from the Richie Rich series with terrible breath. You are a member of the Vegetable Mafia, and your preferred method of killing is slicing and dicing.
Though you are often rather quiet, there is a hidden depth to you, concealed in your many layers. In fact, the Ancient Egyptians worshipped you and believed that your spherical shape and concentric circles symbolized eternity. Because of this, many onions were buried in the tombs of the Pharaohs, to bring them prosperity in the afterlife. The Ancient Greeks believed that onions could make people stronger, which means that you were used as steroids in the very first Olympic Games. Additionally, during the Dark Ages, people used onions as currency for rent, goods and services, and even as gifts! Lastly, before earning its nickname The Big Apple, New York City was originally going to be called The Big Onion, because it is the kinda of city where you can keep peeling off layers while never reaching the core. Basically, you've secretly been running the world for thousands of years, making you the true Illuminati.

When trying to get what you want, you can be very sweet, but at other times you are truly a rapscallion, tearing about and causing mischief, along with your fellow mafiosos.

Your mere presence causes people to burst into tears, and your horrible stench is so overpowering that it takes the words right out of people's mouths. As such, you are the Silencer. Every night, you may PM the hosts a player's name, and that person will be silenced the following phase.

You are allied with the Villainous Vegetables and win when the Fantastic Fruits have been sliced and diced or this is unavoidable.

Spoiler

leetic has won the game! He was the Onion, allied with the Villainous Vegetables!

Suddenly, the kitchen door was flung open. Maniacal Engineer stumbled in, bogged down by the weight of several grocery bags.
He walked over to the fruit bowl, and emptied the contents of the bags into the bowl.
The slovenly engineer then grabbed the half empty bottle of vodka and walked out of the room.

"NOOOOOOOO!" exclaimed the Onion.

To be continued...