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TEEN: guidance

Prologue

Persephone

The Vulture Queen
Joined
Apr 12, 2014
Messages
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Discussion of animal and child abuse, although the actual acts will never be shown on page or gone into in detail. Occasional self harm, sometimes shown. Will be warned for in chapters where it appears.

Cast Page: Contains Spoilers

prologue: thawing

They’re talking about you again.

You don’t understand many of the words, but you know the tone. Talking more in breath than sound, trying to sound quieter than they really are. The same mock concern they take on the moment they turn away from your table, like they aren’t still in the same room.

But you don’t care. You don’t really care about anything anymore, except maybe for Mother. You wonder if she’s thought of you in the last few… days? Weeks? Months? Between the capsule and the trailer you haven’t had many chances to be outside and count the changing skies and you aren’t sure if the humans work and leave once a day or not.

No, as much as you’d like to believe it you can’t imagine she cares about you anymore. The nine-tails only keep two of their litters to train. It lets them keep the territories intact. When the unchosen become three-tails they set off on their own. Your body and mind and comfort are your problems.

And, because you don’t care, those things are now the people in ice-colored-metal’s problems.

They keep you alive. They try to coax you into eating things that help with the bruises and scars. You won’t, because it’s your mouth and you eat what you want. Which is nothing. They took a capsule out once and you bit them. They let you sleep on the table instead of in a cage like the others, and you’ve learned to sleep in the dark while the humans are away and rest on the table in daylight, keeping an eye open for more capsules.

There’s a new human, this time, talking with the faux-ice humans. Young and female. Like you. You caught a glimpse of her mane when she walked in. Thick, curly and went a little past her shoulder-blades. Light-yellowish, like the fire-tails in the stories you’d been told as a kit.

It had leaves in it, some dirt. Even from a distance it smelled unclean, although humans seemed to have a higher tolerance for that. It would be pretty if cared for and you want to run your paws and tongue through it to clean it up like you would for your own coat.

You suppose you still care that you look like a fox should. But presentation is sort of like breathing, so you aren’t sure that counts.

The human approaches you again, with the other humans behind her. She walks up to your table, glancing to the side at the cages as she does so as if this isn’t premeditated, and stops at the edge. You cast him the sort of wary, frigid look that only an ice-type can manage in response.

“Hey,” she vocalizes. “Can I pet you?”

You don’t understand the words, but she offers her paw, keeping it head-length away from your snout. She doesn’t smell nervous. Is this how humans communicate social receptiveness? You haven’t had much chance to see that behavior.

It takes you a few seconds to decide, but you eventually do move to push your face against their paw, rubbing your scent glands against it. Her paw is warm, but not unpleasantly so. You sneeze and a burst of cold air radiates from your body as it compensates a little for the heat. The human recoils for a second, probably on reflex, but puts her paw back up to your head when you look at her expectantly.

*​

She’s back the next time the ice-metal humans are.

This time she opens up the door and looks at you.

“You want to go outside?”

The words are mostly unfamiliar, but you grasp the intent. Yes, you decide, sunlight heat and flower smell would be nice. Rising on your paws is painful as you feel the muscles and skin ripple around your scars and bruises, but it doesn’t feel like anything tears. One of the humans picks you up gently and cradles you in his arms, like Mother and Father would in their jaws when you were a kit. You are unsure how you misbehaved this time. Was it not a genuine offer? A trick?

No. They set you down in the grass outside. Just a different way of communicating.

The sun and air are much warmer on the surface, but your body quickly begins cooling itself and the air to adjust. At the end everything around you is still the same temperature, but you can feel the sunlight striking your fur. And smell the foliage. They’re different flowers than you have on the mountain and there are far more of them. You absent-mindedly walk up to one and wrap your jaws around it to get a better feel for its taste and texture. The young human pulls you away.

“If you want food, they have more vulpix-friendly stuff in there.”

Her tone is cheerful, but you recognize the pleading edge and the ‘food’ vocalization. You turn away and walk closer to the road, puffing up your tails behind you in a show of defiance. Before you reach it, a much larger pokemon cuts you off. He’s quadrupedal, red and black colored and you can feel radiated heat enter your personal blizzard. Fire-type. Big fire-type.

He notes your reaction and adjusts quickly, holding his tail still and lowering himself to the ground before rolling on to his side.

“Didn’t mean to scare you. Just want to play.”

It’s a feline dialect. Close enough to your native vulpine to understand, even if you aren’t sure you got all the possible subtext.

You cock your head. “Play?”

“Yes. Chase each other around or—” He stops short and rises to his paws before slowly walking towards you, head down. You allow him to brush his face against yours. “You’re sick?” He asks. “Hurt. You should get that fixed.”

You slowly lay down and show him your stomach. “How do you heal this?”

His eyes narrow. “Do you have a ball? Or have they tried potions? Those look old and improperly healed, but…” He shakes his head. “You’ll need to get those looked at before we can play. And eat. You look undernourished. Are they providing food or…?”

You tuck your tails between your legs, turn around and head back inside. You don’t want to talk about it. What happened. What happened after. Why you don’t care. He seems well-meaning, and he shouts after you that he’ll be back to play later, but there are things that a healthy fire cat with a gentle (if poorly groomed) human mother won’t understand.

Still. The human seems to like you, and she at least takes care of her cat. She’s not like… like they were. You wonder why she came back, why she cares about you, and you realize that maybe she wants to put you on your team. You’d leave the room. She’d put you in a capsule, sometimes.

But it’s something to hope for. And you’ll take it.

*
You eat that night. The food is dry and bland, but you get some down your throat before your stomach gets upset. Then you let them spray things on you (which sting and hurt) and put you into another capsule. They keep you in it until it’s bright out again.

You stretch out with your front paws and feel your belly react. It hurts less than it did when you went in to the capsule. You roll onto your side and move to scout out the area with your tongue, but you’re met with a spray of water when you do so. On reflex you uncurl, climb to your paws and hiss blindly in the water’s direction, kicking up a frozen mist around you in the process.

A human forepaw reaches down to your arched back and you bite the air around it before bothering to take in more information. It’s the young female human. She seems a bit startled, but not angry. You calm down a bit and let her stroke your back, but you won’t warm up the air for her while she does it.

After a few strokes she reaches down to pick you up, doing so by wrapping her arms around your side and hugging you to her chest. Won’t touch your underside. But she’s less gentle when she drops you down on the table (you still land perfectly, of course) and you feel the bump less.

“She’s doing much better,” one of the humans says. “We’re very thankful for your help in this.”

The female laughs. You know that sound well enough, but it doesn’t seem to be threatening. The last times you heard it were followed by violence. This one is only followed by a chunk of delicious smelling food the size of your head being dumped in front of you.

“Not all at once,” the female says. You can guess the meaning, and it’s unnecessary. You couldn’t possibly eat this in one go if you wanted to.

You end up getting much closer than you would have thought in the end, but half of it’s still left. That goes to her cat, who devours in three bites a chunk that took you dozens. She talks to the other humans for a bit after while the fire cat tries to make conversation with you. But he’s very large and his voice is always approximating a growl, even when he seems to be happy.

The human leaves you a while later with a thorough head scratching.

*​

They aren’t back the next day. Or the next week. Or the next month. You let them spray you with nasty liquids and put you in a capsule and cut you open (while you’re asleep, but still) but she never comes back.

And with every day you sit on a table doing nothing in particular, watching the humans care for sicker creatures until they leave and their sunlight stops, you remember a little bit more why you stopped caring.

Eventually your stomach is fine. They let you lick it again and everything, and you can only feel the scar if you really press your tongue down, doing your best to weave it between all the tufts of fur. And you still don’t know what comes next. You don’t know if you care.

Maybe you would’ve sunk back into the cold darkness behind your eyes, the living death, if you hadn’t received another visitor one day. A very rigid, well-groomed human female. The age where you suspect even her chosen two kits are going on their own to start their litters. There’s another canine with her, but an odd one. Not in his body (brown with what seems to be a built in collar - you hate collars), but in his posture. Unmoving, unflinching. Standing guard for some unapparent threat at all times, only breaking to survey his surroundings with disinterest.

Then the human tells him something and he moves. Deliberately, quickly and all at once. Practiced, formal. More machine than animal. He hops up on your table with an agility you wouldn’t expect from a non-vulpine canine, and you feel the shock wave ripple through it when he lands. But he’s up on his feet a second later, looking at you with the same passive disinterest as he did the walls. His eyes are unyieldingly staring into yours, and you have to break off eye contact first. He doesn’t try to rub his face against yours or get your scent. Instead he simply stands there. Waiting.

Waiting for an order from his human. Waiting for words, more exactly. The human talks, the dog translates.

They give you an offer, a purpose, a chance.

You wonder if becoming one of their moving statues is any better than your apathy. But at least it’s something to do. Something you can do without caring, if you have to. And maybe it’s a future.

You accept their invitation.

[The following excerpt was predominately written in English with individual words or sentences slipping in to Nahuatl or Spanish]

I’m not sure what to do with this. Miss Freeman just gave me a notebook the size of my hand and told me to write down whatever I wanted in it. I understand why she did it. I stop talking (stop moving, almost stop breathing) most of the time during therapy when she asks about the big things. Or the little things. Or anything about me. Which seems to be the only thing she wants to know about. We’re stuck. The book is to say things to the page, because it might be easier to just show her a book rather than saying words at her.

But I can’t really trick my brain like that because, first, I’m blind. That sounds… looks… wrong? Metaphors, yuck. (Wait, is it simile?) Brings me to two. I think in Nahuatl and Spanish and while I pick up some English here and home, close to border, it is hard to put thoughts into English thoughts into English words. I think I have just write things in not English here, but can’t check.

Oh. Back to blindness. I know I can’t read this. I could use a computer, talk to it and listen to it say my words but I’m doing this because I don’t want to say things. No, I have to write.

I put the pen down for an hour. I think I know how to do it now. Talk like I’m not talking to Miss Freeman but to someone entirely new and… someone who doesn’t exist.

Hello. My name is Cuicatl Tlaloc. My dad renamed me Valentina Cabello after the occupation. I like it a little bit. It’s a double (NOTE: what is this called? Like a metaphor and a joke) after my mom. My mom is a goddess of water, fertility, other things. The name is made up and it sounds made up and I like it because it’s almost like a superhero’s secret name. Except, their secret names are the public ones. So is mine. No one can pronounce Nahuatl words and they either start apologizing or raise their voice. It’s a little nice, knowing who I can trust and who I can’t. But I don’t like being more of a burden.

I was born in Anahuac (Mexico). Grew up there. And

[The rest of the entry was originally written in Nahuatl and translated at a later date]

Today. I want to write about today. Or tomorrow. Miss Freeman says I have to make a choice very soon about what happens when I leave. I can go on… I don’t entirely know what it is. A lot of walking? I would get a pokémon? They kept using talking about television. I don’t like having translators in the room and Miss Freeman talks too fast when she’s explaining things. I know I would get a pokémon and mostly be let on my own.

The other option is an orphanage. Here in Alola. Where people would have questions. But I know I couldn’t do anything to justify my presence and if I could the adults wouldn’t let me do it . And since I can’t the adults would be annoyed with me and the kids would mock me.

There really isn’t a second option. I want to feel the sky again. And a pokémon would be nice…
 
Last edited:
a random prenote

I suck at reviewing first chapters/intros; kindly bear with me


first/impressions

There’s something distinctly captivating about your style, and it really shines through in this. I think we talked at some point about how you picked second-person here to get the point across that it was a non-human narrator, and I think that worked really well. There were a ton of hidden gems of lines that simultaneously got key info across while sending home the idea that the narrator was a vulpix. I loved these two in particular for how good they were at conveying strange info:
Young and female. Like you. You caught a glimpse of her mane when she walked in. Thick, curly and went a little past her shoulder-blades. Light-yellowish, like the fire-tails in the stories you’d been told as a kit.
You calm down a bit and let her stroke your back, but you won’t warm up the air for her while she does it.
I think the ending came a bit abruptly—there’s a bunch of lovely buildup to the vulpix warming up (pardon the pun) to everything, and then when the humans don’t come back/the apathy sinks in/and then they join the battling girl out of indifference, it feels a little rushed compared to the rest of the narrative that you’ve spun so beautifully.


description/style

Again, I’m a huge fan. There were a couple of times where I think you might’ve been inconsistent:
“Hey,” she vocalizes. “Can I pet you?”

You don’t understand the words, but she offers her paw, keeping it head-length away from your snout.
I might be reading this wrong, but if the narrator can’t understand it, then is there a point to writing the exact words in the text? I feel like this might undermine the usage of second-person, but overall this is such a tiny nitpick that I don’t think it’s a huge deal.
You eventually do move to push your face against their paw, rubbing your scent glands against it. Her hand is warm, but not unpleasantly so.
This one I thought was a bit jarring because you swap from “their paw” to “her hand” right away—one sentence, the human is a non-gendered (their)/animal-like (paw); the next sentence, the human is gendered (her)/human-like (paw), which is a fair leap to make but maybe a bit aggressive over the span of adjacent sentences.


overall

The human leaves you a while later with a thorough head scratching.
no complaints here 10/10

In all seriousness this is well-written and intriguing. No idea where the plot is going but I’m in for the ride.
 
Squeeeee! Alolan Vulpix. I mean, bad stuff is happening to it, which makes me sad. But, still, I love me my li'l ice fox. *hugs Snowy* I'm only, like, 500% biased, I swear.

You're free to correct me if I'm wrong, but I got a couple of paragraphs in and concluded that this opening chapter is that tiny sidequest in USUM involving an Alolan vulpix getting harrassed by Team Skull Grunts. I hope that's the correct guess. This isn't the first time I've read things in a second-person perspective. I do think it's one of those styles that's hard to pull off and can really easily confuse me. But I didn't have any struggles with the opening chapter, here. The only thing that really stuck out to me is something that kintsugi already pointed out. Namely, you're relatively consistent with having vulpix using animal lingo to describe human body parts. But then there a few moments where that dropped. I'm not sure if that was intentional or not. It didn't, say, suck me out of the story or anything. But glancing over it a second time, I did notice it, and thought it a bit odd. The other part that I was a bit uncertain on is in the last scene. It sounds like you're describing a very rigidly-trained manectric. I couldn't be entirely sure, though, because there's really not enough there for me to differentiate between a manectric and, say, a jolteon. And since it looks like vulpix is going with these two, some clarification might be helpful. That'll probably happen. But just thought I'd point it out.

That aside, I think you put the narrative style to really good use. Even though the exact details of what happened to vulpix are a mystery, I definitely felt bad for its situation. And there were just enough moments in the narration to remind you that there are some mental scars to go with the physical one (like the part with the laughs and how the last time vulpix heard them, violence ensued). Something smaller that I enjoyed (though I may be misreading it), is the reference to vulpix not starting with all its tails and gaining them as it ages. I'm a sucker for small Dex tidbits getting tossed into stories in relevant ways.

Not a whole lot more to say on this. Whether my guess with what's happening is right or not, this looks very interesting and I look forward to reading more. ^^
 
a random prenote

I suck at reviewing first chapters/intros; kindly bear with me
same gurl

first/impressions

There’s something distinctly captivating about your style, and it really shines through in this. I think we talked at some point about how you picked second-person here to get the point across that it was a non-human narrator, and I think that worked really well. There were a ton of hidden gems of lines that simultaneously got key info across while sending home the idea that the narrator was a vulpix. I loved these two in particular for how good they were at conveying strange info: I think the ending came a bit abruptly—there’s a bunch of lovely buildup to the vulpix warming up (pardon the pun) to everything, and then when the humans don’t come back/the apathy sinks in/and then they join the battling girl out of indifference, it feels a little rushed compared to the rest of the narrative that you’ve spun so beautifully.
Thanks. The last scene was rushed. I was tired when writing. I edited it a tiny bit tonight, but I'll add more later in the week or two weeks from now on my editing day.

description/style
Again, I’m a huge fan. There were a couple of times where I think you might’ve been inconsistent: I might be reading this wrong, but if the narrator can’t understand it, then is there a point to writing the exact words in the text? I feel like this might undermine the usage of second-person, but overall this is such a tiny nitpick that I don’t think it’s a huge deal. This one I thought was a bit jarring because you swap from “their paw” to “her hand” right away—one sentence, the human is a non-gendered (their)/animal-like (paw); the next sentence, the human is gendered (her)/human-like (paw), which is a fair leap to make but maybe a bit aggressive over the span of adjacent sentences.
There is absolutely no point to the words being there. It's only for reader comprehension. If they throw people more than they help, I'll take them out.


no complaints here 10/10

In all seriousness this is well-written and intriguing. No idea where the plot is going but I’m in for the ride.
Thank you for the review!

Squeeeee! Alolan Vulpix. I mean, bad stuff is happening to it, which makes me sad. But, still, I love me my li'l ice fox. *hugs Snowy* I'm only, like, 500% biased, I swear.

You're free to correct me if I'm wrong, but I got a couple of paragraphs in and concluded that this opening chapter is that tiny sidequest in USUM involving an Alolan vulpix getting harrassed by Team Skull Grunts. I hope that's the correct guess. This isn't the first time I've read things in a second-person perspective. I do think it's one of those styles that's hard to pull off and can really easily confuse me. But I didn't have any struggles with the opening chapter, here. The only thing that really stuck out to me is something that kintsugi already pointed out. Namely, you're relatively consistent with having vulpix using animal lingo to describe human body parts. But then there a few moments where that dropped. I'm not sure if that was intentional or not. It didn't, say, suck me out of the story or anything. But glancing over it a second time, I did notice it, and thought it a bit odd. The other part that I was a bit uncertain on is in the last scene. It sounds like you're describing a very rigidly-trained manectric. I couldn't be entirely sure, though, because there's really not enough there for me to differentiate between a manectric and, say, a jolteon. And since it looks like vulpix is going with these two, some clarification might be helpful. That'll probably happen. But just thought I'd point it out.
I removed the references to hand. I clarified that the pokemon in question is a rockruff. And, yes, it is that vulpix. The actual trainer and pokemon aren't as important as the impression of them is. The woman will appear as a minor character next chapter, but that rockruff will probaly never be seen again. The real trainer shows up in next month's chapter. And alolan vulpix is the best single pokemon they've made in maybe ever and I'll fight anyone who says differently.

Except maybe mimikyu. Ugh. Hard choice.

That aside, I think you put the narrative style to really good use. Even though the exact details of what happened to vulpix are a mystery, I definitely felt bad for its situation. And there were just enough moments in the narration to remind you that there are some mental scars to go with the physical one (like the part with the laughs and how the last time vulpix heard them, violence ensued). Something smaller that I enjoyed (though I may be misreading it), is the reference to vulpix not starting with all its tails and gaining them as it ages. I'm a sucker for small Dex tidbits getting tossed into stories in relevant ways.
Yup! She's currently a three-tails. Was born a one-tail, will become a nine-tails when she gets to be of breeding age.

Not a whole lot more to say on this. Whether my guess with what's happening is right or not, this looks very interesting and I look forward to reading more. ^^
Thank you!
 
Did not expect you to start a new fic all of a sudden, it seriously grabbed me out of left field (why do you do this to me). Regardless it being in second person isn't anything new for you since you've played with that lately in Iterations. I think you oddly make it work by having us really get into the Vulpix's head and understand how she feels about what's going on around her. I'm assuming that she's in the Aether Foundation or something? based on the context clues we get.

I wish I could say more about it but aside from doing Pokemon perspective a lot better than I do and also giving us all the information on the character across there isn't much to comment on. I'm curious though.
 
They’re talking about you again.
Are they? :eek:
A very good opening line. Carries emotional impact and introduces the second person narration well. It's very fluid and natural.

There’s a new human, this time, talking with the faux-ice humans. Young and female. Like you. You caught a glimpse of her mane when she walked in. Thick, curly and went a little past her shoulder-blades. Light-yellowish, like the fire-tails in the stories you’d been told as a kit.
I feel like the prose in this piece is very poetic, fitting with the unusual nature of Pokemon perspective since it highlights their attention on the immediate but also their present physical surroundings.

It’s a feline dialect. Close enough to your native vulpine to understand, even if you aren’t sure you got all the possible subtext.
The mixture of language choice, here again, highlights the perspective of the Pokemon well.

They give you an offer, a purpose, a chance.

You wonder if becoming one of their moving statues is any better than your apathy. But at least it’s something to do. Something you can do without caring, if you have to. And maybe it’s a future.

You accept their invitation.
You leave the prologue in a way that it could almost serve as a short story itself. Unlike some prologues which might just give a vague outline or allude to the past in some way, this is a very good use of a prologue in general because of the way you chose to tie it up.

How many chapters do you think you'll have for this fic? and how many will be split across different narrators?
I'm very interested to see where this is going, regardless.
 
So. I love the prologue. That's no secret. You've got a gripping opening here, with a simple but effective introduction sentence segwaying into giving us a glimpse into this cute lil Alolan!Vulpix's point of view. There's a decent mix of exposition, emotional writing, and action in this prologue; none seem to overshadow the other, and I thought I got a solid grasp on the Alolan!Vulpix's character already as well as her past and how that's effected her massively.

I like your second person, and I thought a lot about your comments on second person for my own fic. That said, I think there's something fascinating about second person and the POV from a Pokemon, because it can close the gap between the reader and the character. Or it could have the opposite effect and keep taking readers out of the story because they can't actually relate to an Alolan!Vulpix's POV. It could go either way. But I enjoyed reading it personally, here, and all the little details are obviously well thought out and just well portrayed overall in the writing itself.

Probably the most obvious reason I could see myself taken out of the fic through second person is, well, the reminders that the Alolan!Vulpix can't understand human speech. I can read it. I know what's being said. Of course. But then I did that "you don't understand" and it makes me stop to think for a second. It wasn't overbearing, though. I considered it more of establishing clearly early on a language barrier between humans and Pokemon.

Overall, solid af start. This lil fox has grabbed my heart already, that's for sure.
 
Alola
Self Harm, implied parental neglect

Chapter One


The institute is training very young kits this week, so you get your food first.

One of the humans (he’s very new and will probably be gone by season’s end, so you won’t bother to learn his name) lowers a hardpuddle of fresh berries and foodrocks down to the floor in front of you. The stonedogs around you whine and try to rush your bowl. You growl and flash-freeze the air, causing a pile of frost to fall around you in a neat circle. The pups back away. Another, more wide-ranged blast of cold sends them scurrying back to their places and you turn to the bowl to find the berries have been frozen, their insides ice rather than water.

All the better.

As you eat, an unfamiliar human walks in with Matriarch. One of the expeditioners they send out every year with the best canines. She is of dull colors, her hair and skin in the range of brown that is neither dark nor light enough to be eye-catching. Her falsefur is blue, but of a horribly middling and dull shade. You won’t regret it when she leaves you behind.

The girl is bombarded by the kits, and the Matriarch and assistant do their best to send them away.

“Sorry, new litter just came in. Have barely started training.”

The girl laughs, and you reflexively stop to listen. It has the cadence of the windsinging metal that humans put in their gardens. But deeper and more grounded and alive.

“It’s fine. They’re children.” She pauses, frowning. “Is there an ice-type in here? The temperature,” she breaks into a fast murmuring, quiet enough you doubt the humans can hear it, “como se dice—gradient. The gradient is off.”

“There’s a vulpix,” the assistant says.

“An ice vulpix?”

“Yes. One of those,” Matriarch says. “We keep her to train the puppies.”

“Is she trained? For guide work?”

“Technically yes, but.”

She’s interrupted by your very loud purring as you rub against the girl’s leg, pushing in with all of your strength and even warming the air a little bit by reversing your usual reaction.

The human crouches down in response, so her upper leg is parallel to the ground. “Hey, girl—wait, is she a girl?”

“Yes,” assistant says.

“Then I’m sure she’s a very pretty girl. Fairy-type, right?”

You lick her knee. It doesn’t mean yes, or really have any meaning at all. You just like to see how they interpret it it. The girl reaches down to some place near you, probably thinking you want pet. Which you do, of course. You press your head into her palm as confirmation.

“I really think we should be going along now.” Matriarch has the same terse smile she always does when she has to deal with you. Unfortunately, Skysong (she deserves a name), recognizes the subtext and returns to her full height, but not before giving your chin a final scratch. You find yourself purring as she walks away, unconsciously vibrating the air and sending little ripples of cold and warm through the room. In your eighteen Moons here, she’s been one of your favorite humans. Maybe the most interesting since—

You stop purring and glance back to your hardpuddle, only to find that the brown foodrocks gone and the hardpuddle itself licked clean. You huff and watch the tiny snowflakes scatter in front of you. With nothing better to do, you curl up on the ground and begin grooming, keeping an ear trained on Skysong and Matriarch as they head to the latter’s dayden.

“—technically, yes, but she doesn’t have the temperament. She already had one owner and got turned back in within the month." You've learned that a month is about as long as a Moon, but not tied to anything at all.

“What’d she do?” Skysong still sounds upbeat, and you catch the tone in her voice of a human who’s talking to teach, and not to learn.

“She moved around her owner’s things when she was asleep (it had been hilarious), kept falling asleep during the day (the Sun is far too hot to be a Moonsleeper), kept making her master’s bed cold (your body is cold and the nest she gave you was unfit for sleeping in) and peed on their carpet, even though she’s been housebroken (she’d given you a bath).”

Skysong laughs and your muscles unclench. Maybe the cadence is more like rivertalk than windsingers. But you’ve named her already, and you don’t change your names.

“How often was she asleep during the day?”

“About half the time, I think."

“So, if I was going to hike for six hours a day, she could do that? Maybe eight in a city?"

“Miss, we have much better behaved lillipup (youngfluffs), growlithe (stripepups), electrike (yellowkits) rockruff (stonedogs) and eevee (assholes) to pick from. The former are the most responsible guides. Growlithe can light fires and electrike can charge batteries. Rockruff are the most loyal. Eevee can even evolve into an ice- or fairy-type, if that’s what you’re looking for.”

You growl and startle some of the nearby kits. Is Matriarch challenging you?

“Then why do you keep her around?”

“Because she’s very intelligent and is wonderful at public access. And she’s bonded with humans before. Under other circumstances I might let you try, but you have to think of the optics here. Filming starts tomorrow. I’d be fine if you had to get a guide dog replaced mid-production; that’s a teaching moment, even if the producers wouldn’t be happy about it. But the last thing I want is for one of our clients to get stuck with a little hellion with the entire world watching. Sends the wrong impression, right?

One of the kits jumps on you and breaks your focus. You try to shake her off, but she takes it as a sign that you’re willing to play with her. And it’s very hard to shake off a stonedog, even a young one, without getting your fur torn up.

You must have missed something during that time, because Matriarch comes in shortly after. You courteously refrain from biting her. “Pixie,” she calls, before gesturing to the door. You rise to your paws and walk to her side, continuing to match her pace as she walks into the hall. Like a very good guide fox. When you reach the room where you and Hummy had first met, Matriarch looks down at you. “Behave yourself,” she whispers. The door opens and you slip in to properly meet Skysong.

She’s sitting on a chair in front of a table when you enter. You pick up your pace and jump on to the table, purring to ensure she knows you’ve arrived. She smiles and extends her hand to let you press your head into it, after which she starts giving you headscratches. That persists for a while, with neither of you properly speaking, until she pulls her hand away before placing it claws up on the table.

“I’m not sure if English is—if you understand English beyond the commands. If so, can you tap my hand twice.”

You look at her for a second, trying to analyze the situation. Was she trying to really talk to you? It was a very crude system, if so, but it was more effort than any humans had ever put in.

You press your paw into hers twice and she smiles.

“Good. They told me Pixie was what you were called. If I call you that, is it fine?”

Hummy had named you that. You had never earned a name from your mother. So whether you like it or not, you’re now stuck with Pixie, because names don’t change. You press your paw into hers.

“Mine’s Valentina.”

No. It’s Skysong. But you make a note of her human name so you’ll know when she’s being addressed.

“Do you want to go with a human?”

You hold up your paw, but then you stop. Instead, you lick her foreleg right above the paw. She interpreted that well last time.

“You aren’t sure?”

You tap her paw.

“Do you want to stay here?”

You hiss.

“Do you want to go back to your mountain?”

There is a very long pause. Long enough that you feel the need to make the table colder so she knows you’re still there. Eventually you make up your mind, and collapse onto your side on Skysong’s paw.

“The mountain is wonderful and cold and beautiful but there are only memories there now,” you finally say, in your own vulpine tongue.

“And having memories is worse than having nothing at all?”

You freeze. Literally and metaphorically.

“You… understood that?”

Skysong laughs. She does that a lot, thankfully.

“I’m good at languages, and one of the other villagers had a fox pet.”

You have no idea how to respond to that.

“Don’t tell anyone about it, please. I wouldn’t die to keep the secret, but I don’t want it to go public.”

You aren’t sure what exactly “it” is. You don’t think it’s normal for humans to understand any of the pokemon dialects. Is it forbidden? How does she think you would tell another human, anyway? And if you could wouldn't they have the same gift? Are all the foxspeaking humans trying to hunt each other?

Skysong makes harsh throat air (not really harsh though) and continues speaking.

“You don’t know what you want, but you don’t want to stay where you are?” You tap her paw. “I relate to that.” You can almost feel the positive energy she’d been radiating dampen as bitterness takes its place. You recognize that feeling so well you flinch as you wonder if it’s coming from her or from you.

“I’m sorry,” you say.

“Yeah, well, it’s not your fault.”

There’s another quiet moment. Good quiet. But you know your time with her before Matriarch comes back is limited so you get up and start rubbing against her foreleg on the table.

“Why do you want me?”

She smiles, faintly. The kind humans use to signal a feeling that isn’t there.

“I’ve been this way a long time, and I could get by without help. But I need someone to be around to help with… and they didn’t seem to like you, so I figured that maybe you needed help. And I really like fairy-types,” the last part was muttered, loudly enough that she probably wanted you to hear it but think that she didn’t want you to.

Human communication is weird.

“I think, traditionally, I’m supposed to help you.”

“I think traditions are wrong sometimes.”

You decide to collapse onto her paw again, this time with your belly and legs wrapped around her foreleg as you encircle it.

“I’m sorry, did that offend you?”

“No. It was a good answer. If I go with you, what will happen?”

“I will need you to help me get around cities and routes, when hiking. When I’m not doing that, you can do whatever you want. But I’d like to talk to you, sometimes, when you don’t need to be working. Because I feel alone here and you’re a, well, warm is the wrong word, but you’re another living, thinking thing that will be with me.”

You stretch out and kick away from her with your back paws.

“I can do that. Fair warning: I will not be nice.”

She laughs, which seems very out of place. For the first time you wonder if this is a violent, Team Skull-type laugh.

“That’s fine. Just be kind, ok?”

Was there a difference in the subtext between the two words? You start to ask her when Matriarch opens the door and enters the room.

“Have you come to a decision?” she asks.

“Yes, I have, thank you.”

The next quarter-day is mostly boring human stuff, although you tag along with Skysong. You don’t really need to guide her, since there’s always another human there and she was right about not needing much in the way of guidance. The humans tell her about your diet, health and what they understood about keeping you happy and healthy. Which was mostly incorrect, but you’ll fill her in on the real details later. The only important thing for you was receiving a blue leash and collar, the same shade as your wonderful eyes. You will love and cherish them until they are broken, and then you will pout and scream until you are given equally beautiful replacements.

They tell her to come back the next Moonset for the start of filming. Probably with the human who took the stonedog a few Moons back. He had ignored you and just spent the brief moment you'd seen him staring down at his feet. It occurs to you that humans like other humans more than anything else and they might be together for several Moons. With luck you can convince Skysong to spend some time away from him and with you in the meantime.

But at the very least, he didn't pick an eevee.

When all that is done, you and Skysong step outside at Fullsun to head back to her cage in the traveler’s den.

She holds the leash a little tight, but most of the sightless do when they first hold it. When she gets more comfortable with it, you expect she’ll loosen up. You imagine that her discomfort right now, thrust off into a loud and unfamiliar city with only a relative stranger to guide her, is a little greater than the discomfort caused by the grip on your back.

Walking the sidewalks of the city is always irritating. Too many humans walking. Too many humans who expect everyone else to just step aside half-consciously, as part of a giant herdmind you can scarcely comprehend. The most vulpix you’ve ever seen at once was thirty-seven at a gathering of clans over a territory dispute. You suspect that there are far less than 1000 on all of The Mountain. And yet humans gather in groups so dense they almost trip over each other, like young kits scrambling for Mother’s lifewater.

And your job here is to not get tripped over and to keep Skysong safe and unharmed on her way to her destination. They should have trained her. They trained Hummy. Maybe that was tomorrow? They might have mentioned “bonding time” or something like it in the boring human stuff.

You shove that all aside. Focus. You move hard right to avoid an incoming human kit running far too fast to notice anything. Skysong takes the hint and follows, avoiding a high-speed collision. Then there are the normal walkers. Even with the monocolor leash and Skysong’s dark overeyes, people tend not to get out of your way. Sometimes they catch themselves at the last minute, and sometimes you have to jerk hard to the side. Which makes you glad that she’s holding the leash as tight as she is. If she wasn’t you aren’t sure she’d catch the hints.

“Is there a bench?” Skysong asks. “I’d like to sit down for a minute.”

You’re pretty sure you’ve barely been walking for a minute, but you happily make a beeline to the nearest unoccupied bench. Thankfully, they’re abundant in the city. When you arrive you hop up onto it and bark, so she has an idea what height she needs to sit down at. Skysong takes the hint well and eases down into the seat. You take the opportunity to curl up on the horizontal part of her hindlegs. She, in turn, moves her hand onto your back and starts to pet you.

She’s a very good petter. Pushes close to the skin without messing up your fur or hurting you with the pressure. She would be an acceptable partner for that alone.

“You’re stressed,” she says, several pets later. You reflexively curl tighter and pout, sending off a small wave of cold air. “You can talk to me about it.”

“We probably shouldn’t have started training together on the city streets, unsupervised.”

“Oh? I can put you into your ball, if you want.”

“No.” Your response is quick, forceful and crisp, accentuated by a double-ripple of cold.

“…then I can carry you in one arm and use my cane in the other. I’d just rather not see you get trampled.”

No. You are her guide fox and you won’t let her cast aside your help like that. Not until it’s too late to replace you.

She resumes petting you without a word. You stay there for what feels like ages, curled up in Skysong’s lap while she grooms your fur. It’s not something you’ve really experienced since The Mountain, and however conflicted you feel about her helping you, you won’t bring yourself to end it.

“I’ve only been to one really big city before this. And this place smells and sounds very different from Tijuana. In a good way. Less crowded. Closer to the sea. And your food smells… ok, not as good. But still good. Do you get what I’m saying? No, well, I’m rambling…”

She trails off and starts stroking your fur again. While you’re talking about odd and off topic things, you look up her mane. You don’t think humans can change their skin color. Not quickly, anyway. But you know they can change their fur color and there’s no excuse to have fur of such a middling, dull color. Things should be either light as the snow or dark as stone. Everything else is in the blurry and indistinct color range you never had to deal with on The Mountain.

You realize she can’t see your look of disapproval, so you have to speak up. “You should change your fur. To black or the not-quite-white metal color.” The one that she had. On second thought, not that one. Just black.

That gets a laugh out of her. Good or aggressive laugh? You wouldn’t be happy if someone insulted your fur out of the blue. Of course, there’s no real reason to insult your fur outside of jealousy.

“I would, but the dye might damage it. And I like the texture.”

You swat at her fur to inspect the texture. It hangs down a little past her shoulders, so you can just reach up and bat it around a little bit. Yes. It is soft fur. It is best not to break it.

As you open your jaws to tell her as much, you see a smile start to form on her face. You reflexively wince at the sight of bared teeth that close to you, but calm down just as quickly. One of your first lessons after Team Skull was that humans bare their teeth as a sign of friendship. Perhaps it is a signal that, yes, I have sharp weapons at hand but I would happily let you disarm me if you wished. Or a reminder of how much they are not biting the other person?

You gave up on really trying to understand that mystery over two paws worth of moons ago.

“Actually, I think… I think I know something that could work.”

The streets are less busy when you start out again. The rush of humans around Fullsun has declined to the busy but manageable flow of the city at rest. You suspect Skysong would be fine on her own, since you feel her on the other end of the leash reflexively moving away from people before you do. Skysong told you she can see a little, but you have to wonder how much. She could be using sound navigation, though.

You aren’t entirely sure how human senses work after all this time. You know their sight is different – less sharp, but they are very adamant about colors that look the same not looking the same – and they can hear less. But some of the sightless humans seem to hear almost as much as you.

They can’t smell as many things, though. None of the humans seem to. And none seem to think they’re missing out on anything. You wonder how they possibly keep track of all the humans they have to deal with without the benefit of scents. Or how they gauge how someone is really feeling. Do they have to be told? And can people just lie about that? What would be the benefit of lying there? A dominance display, perhaps. Appearing aloof and untouchable by rivals and bad luck.

That must be so lonely.

*​

You stop, and Skysong catches herself and stops a moment later in front of her cage’s door. She slips a card out of a little pouch in her falsefur and waves it around until something in the door clicks. You revise your estimate of her vision down a little based on how long that took.

Once she gets inside, though, she seems to know her way around. The cage only has one nest, which is maybe three times as wide as Skysong and only a little longer. The cage has only just started to develop her scent, suggesting that she hasn’t been there long. Only one or two Moonrises.

Skysong stumbles around until her paw runs into her bag, at which point she bends over and starts rummaging through it. “I’m going to be in the bathroom for a little bit. Make yourself comfortable on the bed.” Shortly after she pulls up a few pieces of falsefur and walks towards the bathroom. When the door is closed, you jump up onto her nest. The pelts are messy and, as you curl up, you notice that Skysong’s scent on them is… off. You sniff around more as the water starts to run in the bathroom. Your ears perk up. She wouldn’t give you a bath, right? You’d thought more of her than that.

No. You hear her falsefur fall to the ground a moment later. She is bathing herself.

You shudder. Humans.

You resume smelling the pelts. They smell faintly like salt. And it smells like she had been stressed. Which is odd. You, for one, are at your least stressed when you’re in your nest preparing to sleep.

The sound of a claw piercing skin and the scent of blood break you out of your investigation in a heartbeat. It’s coming from the bathroom. Your human has been attacked.

You bolt to the door and start scratching it, barking loudly at whatever attacked Skysong and ensuring it that you will bring down the divine cold of the vulpix upon them—

“Hey, hey, it’s ok,” Skysong calls out. “Everything’s fine in here.”

“You’re bleeding.”

“…that is also true. Just, one second.”

The door lock clicks open and the barest of cracks forms between it and the wall. You take the opening and rush in, squeezing your body through and the door a little further open. When you get in, you find Skysong in the barest of her coverings, over the reproductive areas. You know that has some sort of religious symbolism for humans and they don’t let others see those coverings often. They never let anyone else see what’s beneath them.

How they reproduce is anyone’s guess.

Once you’ve entered, Skysong removes her paw from the door and moves her hindleg down to rest on the ground. You didn’t know they could use their backpaws like that; you’d always figured they were functionally like yours, just without claws.

She’s resting on the barrier between the water and the cold, white rocks. You pause on the rocks, looking up at her. There’s blood streaming from the arm hanging over the bath as water continues to flow in to meet it.

“Ok, I know this looks bad, but, just, hear me out.”

There’s a large black claw beside her. Probably stone. It’s wrapped in a red-stained towel. You’re good with that color. Blood. Yours. Your prey’s. Life and death in liquid form.

“I don’t know what you believe. About gods and that. If anything. But where I’m from, there are two sets of gods. Those of the Anahuac and those of the coyōtl. Long ago, um, actually, can we do this when I’m not bleeding?”

You remain seated and looking up at her with concern and expectation.

“Look, I kind of have powers. Things I can do that other humans can’t. One of those will let me heal up the cut,” she does the thing where her fingers move and crack like little lightning, “like that. But I need water. And I’d rather not get fully undressed with… I mean, it’s not like you’d do anything, or it would mean anything to you, but…”

She doesn’t smell or sound like lies or fear. You will trust her, for now. You turn around in silence and push the door mostly closed behind you.

You hear Skysong shed the rest of her falsefur a second later, before sinking into the water. The scents start to change in a way you don’t think you can describe easily, but the smell of blood diminishes quickly. She’s silent for a bit, beyond the splashing of water. Eventually new water stops coming in but she’s still splashing. You get the impression some of it isn’t strictly necessary for grooming and, while you can’t understand how anyone could play (much less in water) after taking an injury like that, you take it as a sign she’s recovered. Somehow. You know some ‘mons can do things like that, but humans can’t. They’re very breakable. So breakable, in fact, that other creatures need to do their fighting for them.

“Where was I? The coyōtl?”

You quietly bark in affirmation. You suspect that her neighbors may not be happy after your last barking fit. Even if it was entirely justified.

“Right. Um. I’ll explain all that later, promise. Not terribly relevant now. What you need to know now is that my mom’s a water and fertility goddess and she gave me two gifts when I set out for Alola. First lets me change my body a little bit with water and blood. Thought I’d use it to change my hair color. And patch up the cut while I’m at it. The second one lets me know what people want most.” She laughs. “Except me. No idea what I want. I told you earlier that’s why I’m here. To figure that out.”

You stay quiet for a while, unsure how to process that.

“Um, you’re being quiet. I’m sure you have questions…”

“Do you want worshipped or—”

“Hell no.”

There’s another pause.

“Ok, what I mean is, basically, just treat me like you did before. Yeah, my mom’s Chalchiuhtlicue, but I’m not. I really don’t want you being afraid of me or anything, and I’m not even that powerful, either.”

She starts to release water from the bath, and you hear her start to rise in it as water sloshes off of and around her. You turn around and jump back into her nest while you listen to the sounds of her getting dressed and cleaning off the claw.

Eventually the door opens, and she steps out. Her falsefur is one white pelt that goes from her collarbone to her legjoints. There’s a scar on her arm, but it’s faint and only two paws long. You don’t think you would have noticed it unless you knew what you were looking for.

The really interesting thing is her mane. It’s a little longer now, going down to about the midpoint of her upper legs. It seems to have two layers to it. The top is a vibrant, shiny green that collects and disperses the light in an almost crystalline way. The layer beneath it is a solid black. It’s an odd and interesting contrast, and you love it. And you very much want to stroke and groom it.

She makes her way over to the nest with cautious steps before her leg gently collides with it. Then she turns around and lowers her body onto the nest. You instantly hop in her lap and start swatting at her mane, hoping she won’t notice.

She does, but she just smiles and runs her own paw through it. “I’ll take that as a sign of your approval?”

You swat it again, and nothing is said. You stay on the nest with her for a long while after, running your paws and face through her mane to get an idea of how to groom it. When you notice that Skysong’s a little less indulgent of the grooming, you curl up in her lap and feel the gentle pulse of her stomach as her breath goes in and out and the churning of blood in her legs with every heartbeat.

The vulpix are messengers and assistants of the gods, keeping temples safe and laws upheld in the times of their absence. Maybe that obligates you to care for their children. But she feels just like an ordinary mammal, and she’s a warm body to curl up against. A warm body that picked you out in spite of all logic to the contrary.

You start purring and Skysong reaches down to scratch your ears.

*

Atlas Entry One
I'm going to take some space at the end of mini-arcs to talk about something that I might never have a chance to address in-story. Here I'm going to talk about the story's handling of guide animals, and Pixie in particular.

In real life, guide dogs are the blind are often quite large and held on a rather short leash. They typically walk beside the human so that constant contact can inform the human where to go.

Pixie comes up to somewhere on Valentina's calf. So when writing this I either had the choice of using mostly fully evolved pokemon for guide purposes or making NFE 'mons larger than I usually headcanon them as or just breaking from reality. I went with the latter. And then decided to show the real world consequences of having a fairly small guide fox in story.

So, why the change? To start with, the idea of giving a child going on an island quest (which, in many cases, is what the institute is for) a fully evolved 'mon felt wrong. For one thing, it's fairly well established in canon that it's hard to form a close bond with a 'mon that's already had substantial life experience under another trainer, especially if the new trainer is a literal child just starting off on the whole training thing. And it would also almost seem like cheating.

Sure, I could have gone with Furfrou. It (in my headcanon) matures rather quickly and doesn't spend a lot of time small. So you could have something that is a canine, young and large. But honestly given the way Furfrou is treated in canon, I don't think most blind trainers could really meet their need for regularly maintained aesthetic perfection. Not without substantial training, anyway.

Or I could have gone with non-canines. There's no real reason to only use dogs when many different species are relatively large, friendly and intelligent. Something like Beeheyem, with levitation, high intelligence and crude telepathy could be a very competent guide. Even something like Ambipom or Ampharos could work.

Honestly I just kept with dogs because there was more real world stuff to draw from and most of them have the advantage of being common and relatively tame based on Alolan locations and 'dex entries. And if they're kind-of-sort-of domesticated, then that's another big plus.

Given all of those decisions, how, exactly, can Pixie work despite her size?

To start with, she's a lot more intelligent than real world canines. And while most trainer's can't necessarily talk to their pokemon, being clever enough to create complicated navigation schemes and remember a lot of locations, as well as having a greater understanding of social situations and geometry (she makes snowflakes in the wild) gives her advantages. It also lets her be trained faster, meaning that she could still be relatively young and impressionable while also having essential training. It's a good combination for a disabled trainer on an island challenge.

Of course, Pixie has some life experience but. Her situations is less than ideal in-universe.

And, unlike most people in real life, trainers on island challenges will often spend a lot of time on paths in the wilderness, where being trampled isn't as much of an issue. So, yes, training a dog like pixie irl wouldn't work terribly well. At least, not until it was Ninetales-sized. But this is fan fiction set in a world with ice-breathing foxes so I took some liberties.
 
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There are already some clear changes going on with vulpix here. And they're conveyed nicely (but also subtlely) through the second-person voice you've got. She's clearly carrying herself with more confidence, and it shows in her opinion and treatment of the rockruffs(?), along with her assessment of the new trainer that shows up (Skysong). She's also much more open toward human contact, actively going up to Skysong to get pet, which stands in huge contrast to the first part of the story. At the same time, she's got a much firmer grasp of the human language going on, now. Which is interesting to see.

“Then I’m sure she’s a very pretty girl. Fairy-type, right?”
This was supposed to be a joke, right? Because it comes up a few times and Alolan vulpix doesn't get the fairy-typing until it evolves and I'll shut up now...

and eevee (assholes)
Tell us how you really feel, huh? I'm kidding. This was pretty hilarious and caught me off guard in a good way. Actually, it's funny to see how much of a little miscrient this vulpix had turned into. Unless it's not the same vulpix from the opening, in which case I imagine I sound extremely stupid right now.

Aww, I think her nickname is cute. Even if there are some depressing connotations behind it. Poor little Pixie. At least Skysong seems to like her, in spite of Matriarch's warnings about her past issues with a different trainer. But then things take a bit of a surprising turn with Skysong letting Pixie know her secret. Coupled with some undertones that maybe Skysong's not quite as cheerful as she lets on. Oh, and it would appear she's blind, as well? That's the impression that I got. Which would explain where the title for this fic comes from, so, uh, roll credits, I guess?

And then we actually get into the whole guiding bit. I certainly don't have all that much experience with this kind of subject, especially since I'm not really in a big city. But I can understand Pixie's nervousness. Going into cities makes me anxious, too, and it always feels like I'm going to get bowled over by something (or someone). It really speaks to Skysong's fortitude and, I guess, selflessness that she's thinking of Pixie's well-being through all of this. Offering to put her back in her ball and everything. It's certainly a different start to their dynamic compared to what I was expecting...

(a few paragraphs later)
... aaaaaand that is definitely not something I was expecting in the slightest. I saw the self-harm content warning and admittedly formed a preconceived notion about what was coming. So to have it instead be something that's magical (and religions) in nature is very different. I haven't read too many Pokémon fics, of course. But certainly none that have brought up Aztec mythology. I... uh... may have had to do some quick Google searching to get a bit of a background on this, since it's something I really don't know anything about, at all. But, it sets precedent for a very different type of dynamic b/w Pixie and Skysong, especially with that second to last paragraph. I'm quite excited to see where you're going to take this! ^^
 
“An ice vulpix?”

“Yes. One of those,” Matriarch says. “We keep her to train the puppies.”

“Is she trained? For guide work?”

“Technically yes, but.”
The dialogue is very fluid here, and the short sentences give it a great mark of intimidation.

The stonedogs around you whine and try to rush your bowl.
The neologisms really help the piece feel more immersive and also gives a greater sense the 'unreal'.

“She moved around her owner’s things when she was asleep (it had been hilarious), kept falling asleep during the day (the Sun is far too hot to be a Moonsleeper), kept making her master’s bed cold (your body is cold and the nest she gave you was unfit for sleeping in) and peed on their carpet, even though she’s been housebroken (she’d given you a bath).”
I'm guessing the parenthesis is part of the character voice as well? We don't see them much outside this section, although they are a unique touch.

Maybe the cadence is more like rivertalk than windsingers.
Same again with the neologism. You're aiming for xenofiction here and I can tell that it's really working.

her, since there’s always another human there and she was right about not needing much in the way of guidance.
Oooh. Already a title drop?

You shudder. Humans.
A short sentence, yet really provides a good sense of insight into the character as well as their personality and motivations.

You resume smelling the pelts. They smell faintly like salt. And it smells like she had been stressed.
What does stress smell like? I guess Pokemon can tell far better than humans.

The vulpix are messengers and assistants of the gods
I would love to hear this mythology! I feel like you're going to use this to tie the story into iterations in some way?

A good section into the next part of the story with an introduction to Skysong and the whole idea of 'guidance' and what it means for the world of the fic (and perhaps also the set up for iterations.) We're also really getting a feel for the world and the narration here which is incredibly unique and somewhat ambitious.
 
Roundtable 1
A quick conclusion to the prologue, moving away from Pixie for a moment.

Production Roundtable #1: March 31

Participants

Kenneth Weiss, Executive Producer and Host of Lanakila Dreams
Asuka Mahi’ai, Director of the Alolan Service Pokémon Institute
Dr. Eliza Freeman, Child Psychologist
Haru Sasaki, Head of Wardrobe Department, longtime crew member
Benjamin “Hawk” Evans, Host of Roughing It With Hawk Evans


The screen flashes to life, slowly fading in and crystalizing until three profiles are clearly displayed. Three headshots, three little pokemon-shaped icons in the corner of each.

Weiss: First up, Genesis Bauer. Autistic. Family are missionaries, but only because they have the money to live comfortably and spread the message. Kind of short. Most distinctive feature is her absolute mess of hair. Starting with a dratini. She’s done the best in our focus groups, but she’s also been the most polarizing. Evangelicals and Catholics love her, pagans hate her. Her starter is the rarest and has the most battle potential.

Ordinarily, I’d be inclined to push her into the protagonist role, but I really don’t want to have our center fall apart in spectacular fashion midway through production. Dr. Freeman, your thoughts?”

Freeman: Well, she started our session by saying that she didn’t believe in psychology.

Evans and Sasaki laugh

Freeman: She might be difficult to work with. If I had to make guesses, with only one two-hour argument to go off of, she marches to the beat of her own drum and hates being pushed off track. Incentives might do the trick, but you won’t be able to order her around or subtly influence her choices. I think she can handle pressure so long as you really try to understand what she wants and how she’s making her choices and try to work from there. She’ll snap quickly if you routinely override her desires.

Weiss: She is highly devout, correct?

Freeman: She told me she wanted to do the show to spread ‘the good news,’ and the rules and fixations she kept coming back to were often religious or moral in nature. To be clear, she also told me I was free to tell you about her agenda.

Weiss: Then how are we going to handle that. Embrace the controversy it will create? Edit things down to a minimum? Keep her as a rival figure and background character?

Evans: Not sure I’d want to get preached at when watching telly.

Mahi’ai: If she wants things to go her way, I wouldn’t edit things too much. Either accept it or rule her out as a protagonist.

Sasaki: If I may?

Weiss: Go on.

Sasaki: I think we can just make her a character on a show. Old-fashioned dress and hair, minimalist makeup, occasional monologues about the good old days or politeness or how society’s gone astray. She’d probably find it acceptable, or at least not quite realize that we’re editing out the evangelizing. The audience would just see her as a gender-flipped Theodore Cleaver with an tiny pet dragon.

Evans: I don’t get the reference.

Sasaki: Leave it to Beaver.

Evans: Oh. Yeah. Sure.

Mahi’ai: She might not notice, but her parents would.

Weiss: They seemed like reasonable, or at least self-interested, people. I’m sure I could convince them that their daughter being a well-liked international media figure is better than getting off a sermon or two and being laughed back into obscurity. Any further thoughts on her, specifically?

Evans: Yeah, Lea? I really don’t see what good a dratini does as a seeing-eye… snake?

Mahi’ai: Her parents bought it. I trained it. And it’s an emotional support snake, not a guide snake.

Evans: Christ, that’s a weird sentence.

Mahi’ai: It helps her get used to touch. And dratini are highly intelligent and quite social.

Weiss: We can return to her later. Next up: Kekoa Hale. One of the Aether House kids. Lost one parent in Sootopolis, the other shortly after. Comes from a military family and you can tell. The only one with any real acting experience, but it’s really just in Foundation PSAs and ads. Starter’s a rockruff that detects seizures in time for a drug to be administered. He’s had it for…

Mahi’ai: About a year.

Weiss: Right. Point is that it’s more trained than the other two’s starters, is what I’m saying. And rockruff poll quite well across demographics. Thoughts on his narrative?

Evans: He looks like a lil’ edgelord.

Freeman: He can be confrontational or withdrawn.

Evans: That’s psych speak for “edgelord,” right?

Freeman: I’m unsure how to answer that question.

Sasaki: Aesthetically, though, what’s he like? Preferred clothing colors and styles?

Weiss: Have I not given you the audition tapes?

Sasaki: You gave me audio.

Weiss: One second.

Sasaki: Thank you. So… yeah. Run down clothes, dark colors, lots of scowling, little spikes in at least one video.

Evans: Knew it.

Sasaki: Dynamic-wise, he’s going to be the edge to Genesis’ everyman. A dark, brooding rival coming from nothing against a privileged religious kid. Odd balance. Usually audiences prefer wealthier characters or darker ones. Having them contrasting is going to make things interesting.

Freeman: I could see him not getting along with Genesis. But his social skills are considerably more developed than hers when he chooses to use them. I’m not sure if that complicates the ‘dark’ narrative or not.

Sasaki: We can work with that. Genesis doesn’t dress particularly well. If we lean in with the generic, older wardrobe on her and give Kekoa more money and nicer clothes to work with, having a dark, well-dressed and suave rival can still work.

Evans: Are you suggesting we make him a vampire?

Sasaki: Hmm. We could maybe go that way.

Mahi’ai: I’m not in the industry, so forgive me if this is wildly off base, but he’s barely 14.

Sasaki: And?

Mahi’ai: No 14-year-old is suave.

Sasaki: No unedited, uncoached 14-year-old is. Besides, if he’s not the primary POV than that won’t matter too often.

Evans: What’s he want to evolve the rockruff into?

Mahi’ai: I would generally recommend midday. Having a health-related service dog go through a very unruly phase is less than ideal.

Sasaki: Midnight fits the vibe more.

Mahi’ai: And midday is more useful for the kid’s epilepsy.

Freeman: I agree pushing him to a midnight form evolution would be a safety risk.

Evans: I could help manage the evolution angst. I’ve worked with lycanroc before. Half-dozen other wolf species as well. And if you’ve tamed mightyena and houndoom, a half-domesticated wolf isn’t a problem at all.

Weiss: Is the rockruff at all close to evolution?

Mahi’ai: I very much doubt it starts evolving until they reach Akala.

Weiss: Then we’ll invite him to another roundtable on the subject, with a doctor and our consul present, later in the season. Next up: Valentina Cabello. Recent refugee from Mexico, been in Alola for less than 48 hours. Three-quarters Aztec. Has an Alolan Vulpix as a starter. She’s blind. Hasn’t done well in focus groups. To start with, she actually believes in the Aztec Pantheon, which is enough to sink her favorability rankings very quickly. Then a large portion of the focus groups have had serious doubts about her ability to travel and battle while blind. If we did it very quickly, we could probably pull one of the other applicants up and send her on her way if all of that’s insurmountable.

Freeman: Before this gets started, I need to say that she asked that almost all of our session be kept in confidence. What I can say is that she has high emotional intelligence, but she is a very recent refugee. I wouldn’t put too much stress or focus on her while she’s getting her emotional bearings again.

Weiss: Will she be able to handle the show?

Freeman: Give her a month. You can occasionally film her or give her mild challenges until then. No big stressors.

Weiss: If Genesis is going to be the protagonist, then, we should probably try and nudge her to either travel with Kekoa or on her own at the beginning.

Mahi’ai: She’s blind and in a foreign country. I don’t think she should be on her own.

Sasaki: We could have one of us tag along with her for a little while.

Freeman: I think it would be better if she was with Kekoa.

Mahi’ai: If that’s out of the way, I need to talk about that vulpix. Pixie’s been abused before and it’s tainted her view of humans. She’s spiteful at best, borderline feral at worst. She usually does fine with other pokémon, but I would support giving her a month out of focus just to reduce the risk of that interrupting the show.

Sasaki: I actually think that could be quite the subplot.

Mahi’ai: For you, maybe. I, for one, am trying to show the world how well pokémon can help people like her. If that blows up in her face then it makes me, and the entire assistive community, look bad.

Evans: Has she ever been affectionate to a human before?

Mahi’ai: One. She was then abandoned.

Evans: Hmm. Does Pixie seem to like Valentina?

Mahi’ai: She’s at least pretending to.

Evans: Did she seem to like the previous trainers you’ve put her with?

Mahi’ai: I think she wanted out of the institute more than she liked the trainer.

Evans: Well, then she’s learned from that mistake. Foxes are very choosey about the humans they’ll associate with. If the fox is ok with Valentina and I can give her some tips, everything should be fine. Probably.

Weiss: Can she travel with her condition?

Mahi’ai: She’s been legally blind since birth. I suspect she’ll be able to get around fine between Pixie, a smartphone and some help from the production team or her traveling partner.

Weiss: Ok. Sasaki, any ideas on how to spin her?

Sasaki: If I may ask, Dr. Freeman, what exactly do you mean by emotional intelligence?

Freeman: She can manage her own feelings well and recognize them in others.

Sasaki: Is she a nice person?

Freeman: I got the impression she was the nicest of the three.

Sasaki: Then we can frame her as the heart.

Evans snickers

Sasaki: Not like— it doesn’t matter. The twist with her can be how gentle, supportive and normal she is. If we pair her with Kekoa then she could try and help blunt his edges. Allows for a fallback dynamic if Genesis really won’t play the sympathetic protagonist part. If nothing else, I suspect Genesis and Valentina aren’t going to get along very much. Lets Valentina either play either a secondary, female rival to Genesis or Genesis play a nasty, racist and theocratic rival to Valentina later on. Flip Val to the everyman and try to get people to relate while Kekoa is a foil and Genesis is all but a villain.

Weiss: There’s a large group of people who really wouldn’t like that portrayal.

Sasaki: Right. We can’t really moralize ourselves or anything, but if we just edit Genesis’ statements and interactions to be the kind of things her supporters will agree with and everyone else will be repulsed by, both groups can come away thinking that their side was the real hero.

Weiss: Play both sides of the culture war?

Sasaki: I think we could manage it.

Weiss: I’ll think about it and run the idea by some former producers. Thank you all for coming. I look forward to working with you in the future.
 
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A quick conclusion to the prologue, moving away from Pixie for a moment.
So it's kind of an interlude then? Why not call it an interlude?

Participants

Kenneth Weiss, Executive Producer and Host of Lanakila Dreams
Lea Mahi’ai, Director of the Alolan Service Pokémon Institute
Dr. Eliza Freeman, Child Psychologist
Haru Sasaki, Head of Wardrobe Department, longtime crew member
Benjamin “Hawk” Evans, Host of Roughing It With Hawk Evans


The screen flashes to life, slowly fading in and crystalizing until three profiles are clearly displayed. Three headshots, three little pokemon-shaped icons in the corner of each.
Quite a variation on the last chapter, it's nice seeing a new perspective. It really shakes up the narrative.

Ordinarily, I’d be inclined to push her into the protagonist role, but I really don’t want to have our center fall apart in spectacular fashion midway through production. Dr. Freeman, your thoughts?”
I'm really curious about this. So this is really a drama show and the protagonist is unaware of it or is it an unethical psychological experiment? A reality show? Or some kind of mixture between all three.

Evans: He looks like a lil’ edgelord.
'edgelord' is technical language in this universe? :p

Evans: Are you suggesting we make him a vampire?
I mean, it'll probably get you more popularity with the YA audience?

Mahi’ai: No 14-year-old is suave.

Sasaki: No unedited, uncoached 14-year-old is. Besides, if he’s not the primary POV than that won’t matter too often.
Again, YA is still an audience :p


Weiss: Play both sides of the culture war?

Sasaki: I think we could manage it.
So there are political intentions behind this immoral reality show/psychological experiment? It adds an extra layer to this whole thing and has the potential to be very insightful!

Sorry, this review wasn't very detailed! It was mostly me asking questions and interactions with the characters somehow! Regardless, this is a very interesting direction for the story to take and I'm very curious to what angle it's going to take, especially with the new sense of dramatic irony.
 
So, I had absolutely intended to read this little interlude yesterday... and then lost track of time playing Kirby because Star Allies hype. Sorry! @.@

Let me start off by saying that I have no idea what production roundtables really are (or if they actually exist), so I can't say anything about how accurate they are. But can I just say that Hawk Evans is about as good of a Bear Grylls-esque name as I could possibly imagine... and that it made me smile a bit? Too late, said it anyway. The idea of formatting it as a transcript is also pretty neat. Very memo-like. Makes me feel like I'm in an office.

with only one two-hour argument to go off of, she marches to the beat of her own drum and hates being pushed off track. Incentives might do the trick, but you won’t be able to order her around or subtly influence her choices.
I'd say that's pretty accurate to some of the classical presentations of ASD. And sometimes these individuals can get a bit of a one-track mind and focus intently on something specific (in this case, devout devotion to a particular religious sect). I can't quite tell the angle you're going for with the crew discussing how to handle Genesis. Like, are they coming up with reality show ideas? It almost sounded like they were planning some sort of competition. I'm just super curious, because my first thought reading this stuff was, "this seems like a bad idea to put a kid like this on TV." And I'm not sure how right/wrong I am. ^^;

Kekoa sure sounded like Gladion there, for a second, heh heh. And, yeah, the fact that they're actually conversing about forcing a service wolf-dog thingy to evolve into a more tempermentally unstable form because it's better for ratings really rubs me the wrong way. By which I mean you wrote it well and made me raise an eyebrow and be like, "Wait a second, that seems like a really bad idea." And then they get into discussing Valentine. It's an interesting contrast seeing these adults discuss her and Pixie given what we saw in the last chapter. Since it was coming from Pixie's perspective (I think? Second person confuses me a bit...), I got the feeling she actually likes Valentina/Skysong, so hearing the doctor say it may just be an act was an interesting little nugget of information I'll stow away for future chapters.

The general sense I've gotten from this is that they're planning some sort of reality show or contest, possibly focused around the Island Challenge? There were some of the hallmarks of reality TV there, like one of the producers mentioning editing statements to appease as many in the audience as possible. If I'm wrong, definitely correct me. And if now, I'm quite interested to see where things go from here. ^^
 
Naturally, I don't have many profundities, but I'll shitpost my way through this so you're obligated to read The Deprogramming (y u do dis):

The girl reaches down to some place near you, probably thinking you want pet. Which you do, of course.
Y E S
the Sun is far too hot to be a Moonsleeper
Precious vocabulary!!
Miss, we have much better behaved lillipup (youngfluffs), growlithe (stripepups), electrike (yellowkits) rockruff (stonedogs) and eevee (assholes) to pick from.
I really enjoyed the little explanations; also, calling Eevees "assholes" made me smirk.
I’ve been this way a long time, and I could get by without guidance.
DING DING DING
“I think, traditionally, I’m supposed to help you.”

“I think traditions are wrong sometimes.”
ooooo good shite
You will love and cherish them until they are broken, and then you will pout and scream until you are given equally beautiful replacements.
10/10 GOOD ICE PUPPER
She’s a very good petter. Pushes close to the skin without messing up your fur or hurting you with the pressure. She would be an acceptable partner for that alone.
See, this also qualifies as good shite. This is proof that you know how to properly pat an animal! YES!!!!!!
“…then I can carry you in one arm and use my cane in the other. I’d just rather not see you get trampled.”
Aaaand that confirmed it! I knew she was blind! And this is her seeing eye pupper!
As you open your jaws to tell her as much, you see a smile start to form on her face. You reflexively wince at the sight of bared teeth that close to you, but calm down just as quickly. One of your first lessons after Team Skull was that humans bare their teeth as a sign of friendship. Perhaps it is a signal that, yes, I have sharp weapons at hand but I would happily let you disarm me if you wished. Or a reminder of how much they are not biting the other person?
GOOD DETAIL, YO
You suspect that her neighbors may not be happy after your last barking fit. Even if it was entirely justified.
This is a little too real for me . . .
Ordinarily, I’d be inclined to push her into the protagonist role, but I really don’t want to have our center fall apart in spectacular fashion midway through production.
Interesting. This strikes me as . . . an ultra-meta take on the reality TV trio from 8ES? DAYUM. I approve. It read like a talking-head scene, but I can tell that's what you were going for. All of the people involved meshed very well; you could practically argue it was an actual transcription (although if it was, I'd add more small bits of speech, as most things don't have wholly uninterrupted sentences). This means that we'll need a Crossover Battle with these kids against Ace's own. Conclusion as a whole: G O O D S H I T E
A G E N D A
 
hey there long time no c
One of the expeditioners they send out every year with the best canines. She is of dull colors, her hair and skin in the range of brown neither dark nor light enough to be eye-catching. Even her falsefur is blue, but of a middling and bull shade. You won’t regret it when she leaves you behind.
I like this dynamic a lot. Knowing you it's probably foreshadowing for when someone gets left behind, but given how straightforward and "right" Pixie (lmfao) has been in the narration, I did buy that this wasn't going to be her trainer for the story. It's a really nice twist from the "as soon as they walked in the door I knew they were different" trope that we usually see.
(about as long as a Moon, you’ve learned, but not actually tied to anything at all).”
The sassy parenthetical interjections are really refreshing. Just wanted to slap that somewhere. It adds character to your narrator while handling light exposition. Good shit.
“About half the time, I think (sounds right).”
“So, if I was going to hike for six hours a day, she could do that? Maybe eight in a city? (Only if scratches, pets, food and her voice were provided in adequate amounts.)”
On the other hand (and I regret saying this because I really don't have a cleaner suggestion for presentation), seeing Pixie's interjection in other people's dialogue was confusing. The first one especially doesn't read quite like her, and the first time through I actually thought that the (sounds right) was from Matriarch, given that half of the words she actually says ("About" /"I think") are also questioning her statement, so "sounds right" fits pretty much in the middle there.

Overall the details in this chapter are what sell me. You spent a lot of time thinking out these characters and it shows. I genuinely care about these characters, which is weird because I don't even know where they're going yet. Pixie nicknaming her human is ironically mocking the journeyfic genre and yet I don't care; it's funny. Valentina gets to talk to pokemon and that's normally a red flag but I don't care; the way she does it is endearing and respectful. You name drop guidance a lot but it fits well enough. There's something beautiful and ominous about you don't have to be nice, just be kind that sells me on this dynamic and I don't even know what they want to be doing yet. Good shit.
Those of the Anahuac and those of the coyōtl.
hahaha it's funny because one of them is water and the other is doggo I SEE YOU
“Right. Um. I’ll explain all that later, promise. Not terribly relevant now. What you to know now is that my mom’s a water and fertility goddess and she gave me two gifts when I set out for Alola. First lets me change my body a little bit with water and blood. Thought I’d use it to change my hair color. And patch up the cut while I’m at it. The second one lets me know what people want most.” She laughs. “Except me. No idea what I want. I told you earlier that’s why I’m here. To figure that out.”
Aaaand here's the premise. It's simple enough to be stated and yet... I like it a lot. It ties in well to your themes of guidance and abandonment and whatever the hell else you've been hinting at throughout the chapter. It grounds your journeyfic and makes it more than just someone who wants a gym badge or to pass the trials or to be the heroine of 8ES or whatever the hell Alola equivalent is; at its core this is maybe a story about people seeking what they want most? And probably failing spectacularly?
“Do you want worshipped or—”
quality line 10/10 but also I think you accidentally a word
The vulpix are messengers and assistants of the gods, keeping temples safe and laws upheld in the times of their absence. Maybe that obligates you to care for their children. But she feels just like an ordinary mammal, and she’s a warm body to curl up against. A warm body that picked you out in spite of all logic to the contrary.
ugh stop I love these kids please let nothing bad ever happen to them despite all your gleeful taunts to the contrary

The next chapter is interesting. I think I know what you're trying to go for here -- this is a parody of journeyfics and reads kind of like an author's internal thought process as they map through what characters will have which roles. Little lines like how Valentina and Genesis can have different amounts of screentime and play to both sides of the culture war erally drive that point home for me. It's a clever way to dissect your fic on the meta level, and I look forward to seeing if this outline actually gets followed or if things start exploding -- obviously they don't know about Valentina's heritage, so it's clear that they aren't actually in full control of this narrative even if they pretend not to be.

I want to write a paragraph about how it doesn't seem like a good habit to blatantly lay out character arcs like this, but I have a gut feeling that there's more to this than meets the eye, so mostly I'm impressed by how this played out and looking forward to more.
 
You grow and flash-freeze the air

I think you meant to put growl here.

“She moved around her owner’s things when she was asleep (it had been hilarious), kept falling asleep during the day (the Sun is far too hot to be a Moonsleeper), kept making her master’s bed cold (your body is cold and the nest she gave you was unfit for sleeping in) and peed on their carpet, even though she’s been housebroken (she’d given you a bath).”

I really loved this paragraph, paritcularly the end where Pixie basically admits she just peed on her old trainer's bed just cause they gave her a bath. It's kind of weird that she hates them so much considering she also likes to keep her fur clean.

The must vulpix

"The most"

You bolt to the door and start scratching it, barking loudly at whatever attacked Skysong and ensuring it that you will bring down the divine cold of the vulpix upon them—

Nothing about this, it just made me chuckle which...in retrospect is kind of weird since it kind of kills the tension but it was also a fun laugh for me.

When you get in, you find Skysong in the barest of her coverings, over the reproductive areas.

Pretty clean term there huh.

How they reproduce is anyone’s guess.

It is truly a mystery.

You turn around and silence

"You turn around in silence"

Chapter 1

You know, I didn't realize until halfway through the chapter that A. Valentina was blind and B. that Pixie was trained as a guiding Pokemon. I guess I shouldn't be surprised that you would go into detail about how different species of canine Pokemon would help humans depending on the work they put, and it does add a unique twist. It's still a bit shocking when you remember that this is a prequel to Iterations so the whole thing with the gods and stuff is still very much there, which makes me wonder why Valentina can't just heal her blindness, though she probably doesn't want to use her powers for something like that.

Other details like Pixie giving the other Pokemon their own names and her insistence on names being permanent were also a good way to show us how much she values labeling others, but not just any labels but labels of her own, she's got a lot of personality for a little Vulpix. Though, Eevees being named Assholes still makes me laugh.

We also get enough hints about Pixie's past in chapter 1, particularly about her old trainer, who I assume is the one that we saw in the prologue. This gets me curious since she didn't seem like a bad person, but I guess everyone has more sides to them than meets the eyes and its an intriguing way of showing it.

Valentina's and Pixie's interactions are also unique, they have a very natural back and forth between each other and young Valentina seems really different from the Valentina we met in Iteratons' interlude. I also think she carries this air of melancholy, like she's seen a lot more than she lets on, but maybe I'm just speculating needlessly.

Lastly, the scene with Valentina in the bath tub caused a jarring shift in the whole chapter that felt really odd, though I guess that's how it felt for Pixie too. Either way, it was a good way to showcase Valentina's power and give us insight into her heritage.

Interlude

The Interlude...kind of changes things a bit but it also puts things in context. I was wondering what it was that Valentina had to do that she would get Pixie, originally I thought it was just a normal journey but it seems like it's for a TV show instead. Interestingly enough this reminds me of what 8ES did with its Reality Stars supporting cast, so I'm curious to see what you do with a similar concept.

I like how you showcase this board meeting as some skype call between a bunch of people with different views on what they want for the show, as well as the ways in which they try and craft their own lies for it. It sheds a light on some of the things going on in the background, like the entertainment industry for this world, which is a lot like ours admittedly. I wonder how alike the characters will be in reality to the role that the producers want to make for them and what awaits Valentina and Pixie in turn.

Also, is this gonna be a reality tv show then? or is it going to be like a proper show?
 
So it's kind of an interlude then? Why not call it an interlude?
Because this is a Production Roundtable. Interludes are going to be a separate and much rarer thing.

I'm really curious about this. So this is really a drama show and the protagonist is unaware of it or is it an unethical psychological experiment? A reality show? Or some kind of mixture between all three.
It's a reality television show heavily inspired by a B-plot in How to Conquer Kanto in Eight Easy Steps

'edgelord' is technical language in this universe? :p
I mean, it'll probably get you more popularity with the YA audience?
Again, YA is still an audience :p
You're starting to think meta enough.

So there are political intentions behind this immoral reality show/psychological experiment? It adds an extra layer to this whole thing and has the potential to be very insightful!
Everything Is Political and these are (mostly) professional entertainers who know that. Besides, they brought the politics into it by highlighting disability and picking people of three separate ethnic backgrounds.

Sorry, this review wasn't very detailed! It was mostly me asking questions and interactions with the characters somehow! Regardless, this is a very interesting direction for the story to take and I'm very curious to what angle it's going to take, especially with the new sense of dramatic irony.
Don't be sorry! I really want to know what questions readers are asking and which they want answered sooner rather than later.

Let me start off by saying that I have no idea what production roundtables really are (or if they actually exist), so I can't say anything about how accurate they are. But can I just say that Hawk Evans is about as good of a Bear Grylls-esque name as I could possibly imagine... and that it made me smile a bit? Too late, said it anyway. The idea of formatting it as a transcript is also pretty neat. Very memo-like. Makes me feel like I'm in an office.
Hawk Evans is already my favorite character in this story.

I'd say that's pretty accurate to some of the classical presentations of ASD. And sometimes these individuals can get a bit of a one-track mind and focus intently on something specific (in this case, devout devotion to a particular religious sect). I can't quite tell the angle you're going for with the crew discussing how to handle Genesis. Like, are they coming up with reality show ideas? It almost sounded like they were planning some sort of competition. I'm just super curious, because my first thought reading this stuff was, "this seems like a bad idea to put a kid like this on TV." And I'm not sure how right/wrong I am. ^^;
This is a reality show. They would never put someone too stable on this. It'd make for bad television.

Kekoa sure sounded like Gladion there, for a second, heh heh. And, yeah, the fact that they're actually conversing about forcing a service wolf-dog thingy to evolve into a more tempermentally unstable form because it's better for ratings really rubs me the wrong way. By which I mean you wrote it well and made me raise an eyebrow and be like, "Wait a second, that seems like a really bad idea." And then they get into discussing Valentine. It's an interesting contrast seeing these adults discuss her and Pixie given what we saw in the last chapter. Since it was coming from Pixie's perspective (I think? Second person confuses me a bit...), I got the feeling she actually likes Valentina/Skysong, so hearing the doctor say it may just be an act was an interesting little nugget of information I'll stow away for future chapters.
Matriarch has a grudge against Pixie and, after what happened with Hummy, is convinced that Pixie is a hellion out to act sweet for a few weeks and then become a living nightmare. That is not Pixie's plan as of now. But it does actually sound kind of fun! Just not to her... yet.

The general sense I've gotten from this is that they're planning some sort of reality show or contest, possibly focused around the Island Challenge? There were some of the hallmarks of reality TV there, like one of the producers mentioning editing statements to appease as many in the audience as possible. If I'm wrong, definitely correct me. And if now, I'm quite interested to see where things go from here. ^^
Everyone is playing everyone else. You can't be too paranoid when reading into anyone's motivations in this story. I'll just say that up front.

Naturally, I don't have many profundities, but I'll shitpost my way through this so you're obligated to read The Deprogramming (y u do dis):
Oh. I, um, I need to get on to that. The review. Not the reading. I already gave you my basic thoughts, though.

Aaaand that confirmed it! I knew she was blind! And this is her seeing eye pupper!
Real talk: I thought this was more obvious. Like, she's introduced asking if there's a vulpix in the room because the temperature feels off when there's clearly a vulpix right in front of her.

Interesting. This strikes me as . . . an ultra-meta take on the reality TV trio from 8ES? DAYUM. I approve. It read like a talking-head scene, but I can tell that's what you were going for. All of the people involved meshed very well; you could practically argue it was an actual transcription (although if it was, I'd add more small bits of speech, as most things don't have wholly uninterrupted sentences). This means that we'll need a Crossover Battle with these kids against Ace's own. Conclusion as a whole: G O O D S H I T E
As mentioned above, it's heavily inspired by 8ES in particular and the GalacticVerse as a whole. And that's a good comment. I should probably make things flow less well. Or clarify that the transcript is [edited for clarity]

A G E N D A
Now I have to put that in every single chapter somewhere.

hey there long time no c
I like this dynamic a lot. Knowing you it's probably foreshadowing for when someone gets left behind, but given how straightforward and "right" Pixie (lmfao) has been in the narration, I did buy that this wasn't going to be her trainer for the story. It's a really nice twist from the "as soon as they walked in the door I knew they were different" trope that we usually see.
The sassy parenthetical interjections are really refreshing. Just wanted to slap that somewhere. It adds character to your narrator while handling light exposition. Good shit.
Thanks! Skysong is visually unappealing as of the start of the story (her mane is ok now). She's really only interested in the voice and personality.

On the other hand (and I regret saying this because I really don't have a cleaner suggestion for presentation), seeing Pixie's interjection in other people's dialogue was confusing. The first one especially doesn't read quite like her, and the first time through I actually thought that the (sounds right) was from Matriarch, given that half of the words she actually says ("About" /"I think") are also questioning her statement, so "sounds right" fits pretty much in the middle there.
I removed some of the dialogue parentheticals that I thought wouldn't be obviously Pixie's inner monologue.

Overall the details in this chapter are what sell me. You spent a lot of time thinking out these characters and it shows. I genuinely care about these characters, which is weird because I don't even know where they're going yet. Pixie nicknaming her human is ironically mocking the journeyfic genre and yet I don't care; it's funny. Valentina gets to talk to pokemon and that's normally a red flag but I don't care; the way she does it is endearing and respectful. You name drop guidance a lot but it fits well enough. There's something beautiful and ominous about you don't have to be nice, just be kind that sells me on this dynamic and I don't even know what they want to be doing yet. Good shit.
We've talked about this, but Skysong is my attempt to take the Mary Sue Classic and tear it to shreds. So I felt like Chapter One had to establish that she's a demigoddess with a wonderful voice, literally supernatural hair, the ability to talk to 'mons and a really gentle personality. And all of that's true! But... well, it's going to be a long, long road to rock bottom. And she'll pave some of that path herself.

hahaha it's funny because one of them is water and the other is doggo I SEE YOU
It's going to be a very awkward conversation when Skysong has to explain that the Mexica refer to the Spaniards as dogs in a derogatory way.

Aaaand here's the premise. It's simple enough to be stated and yet... I like it a lot. It ties in well to your themes of guidance and abandonment and whatever the hell else you've been hinting at throughout the chapter. It grounds your journeyfic and makes it more than just someone who wants a gym badge or to pass the trials or to be the heroine of 8ES or whatever the hell Alola equivalent is; at its core this is maybe a story about people seeking what they want most? And probably failing spectacularly?
She's 13 at story start (word of godding that). Thirteen year olds aren't qualified to save the world. They aren't even really qualified to pick a life plan. They're in the awkward liminal phase between childhood and adulthood where they start having to think about their place in the world while having a very limited ability to actually do anything about it. And at it's core, 8ES and Mary Sue classic decon-recon switching aside, that's what this story is about. Being lost and clinging to other lost people for guidance.

ugh stop I love these kids please let nothing bad ever happen to them despite all your gleeful taunts to the contrary
Stop reading. Open another link on the front page of this forum. Because this isn't the kind of story that ends with a Bad Guy defeated and everyone ending up happily ever after. As I said above, everything after this is a long, bitter road to rock bottom.

(Gods, I've always wanted to do the Lemony Disclaimer.)

The next chapter is interesting. I think I know what you're trying to go for here -- this is a parody of journeyfics and reads kind of like an author's internal thought process as they map through what characters will have which roles. Little lines like how Valentina and Genesis can have different amounts of screentime and play to both sides of the culture war erally drive that point home for me. It's a clever way to dissect your fic on the meta level, and I look forward to seeing if this outline actually gets followed or if things start exploding -- obviously they don't know about Valentina's heritage, so it's clear that they aren't actually in full control of this narrative even if they pretend not to be.
They have no idea what they're doing but they'll sure act like they do.

I want to write a paragraph about how it doesn't seem like a good habit to blatantly lay out character arcs like this, but I have a gut feeling that there's more to this than meets the eye, so mostly I'm impressed by how this played out and looking forward to more.
There's a gap in what they don't know wide enough to shatter a production with. Keeping things on the rails is going to be Mr. Weiss' biggest struggle in this story.

I really loved this paragraph, paritcularly the end where Pixie basically admits she just peed on her old trainer's bed just cause they gave her a bath. It's kind of weird that she hates them so much considering she also likes to keep her fur clean.
Word of God: Pixie's closely descended from fire-type vulpix, so she hates water, even if it doesn't actually hurt her anymore. And there's no need to be drowned and get her beautiful fur all damp and clingy when she cares for it herself. And it's insulting that a human thinks they can improve upon her grooming.

Nothing about this, it just made me chuckle which...in retrospect is kind of weird since it kind of kills the tension but it was also a fun laugh for me.
Sometimes I'll let the tension reach full throttle. Usually I won't. All my warnings to Kintsugi aside, this is still meant to be a softer story in a lot of ways than Iterations and Vaira. Backgrounds is actually probably the best parallel in what to expect (except with almost entirely linear time). I let things reach their climax at the very end and overflow, but until then everything narrowly kept a lid on it.

Pretty clean term there huh.
Thank you for the grammar/prose notes. I won't pretend that I'm grammatically perfect; I'm actually pretty bad at that. I'm a writer more than an editor.

Chapter 1
You know, I didn't realize until halfway through the chapter that A. Valentina was blind and B. that Pixie was trained as a guiding Pokemon. I guess I shouldn't be surprised that you would go into detail about how different species of canine Pokemon would help humans depending on the work they put, and it does add a unique twist. It's still a bit shocking when you remember that this is a prequel to Iterations so the whole thing with the gods and stuff is still very much there, which makes me wonder why Valentina can't just heal her blindness, though she probably doesn't want to use her powers for something like that.
That will be addressed in universe. Word of God: She's had her powers for ~2 weeks and hasn't tried because she doesn't really view her blindness as that much of an impediment. She's literally always had it so the idea that she could modify her eyes barely occurs to her. And, once again, I was thinking it was more obvious she was blind? I guess I've misconstrued some things.

Other details like Pixie giving the other Pokemon their own names and her insistence on names being permanent were also a good way to show us how much she values labeling others, but not just any labels but labels of her own, she's got a lot of personality for a little Vulpix. Though, Eevees being named Assholes still makes me laugh.
Pixie has spunk alright.

We also get enough hints about Pixie's past in chapter 1, particularly about her old trainer, who I assume is the one that we saw in the prologue. This gets me curious since she didn't seem like a bad person, but I guess everyone has more sides to them than meets the eyes and its an intriguing way of showing it.
Word of Godding some things: Luna, the female player character of Gen 7, was the girl in the prologue. Hummy was a previous blind girl they tried to pair her with, after Luna softened and then hardened her heart towards humans.

Valentina's and Pixie's interactions are also unique, they have a very natural back and forth between each other and young Valentina seems really different from the Valentina we met in Iteratons' interlude. I also think she carries this air of melancholy, like she's seen a lot more than she lets on, but maybe I'm just speculating needlessly.
You're on the right track. And (word of godding this one too) she's 21 in Iterations. She's 13 here. People change a lot in that time span.

Lastly, the scene with Valentina in the bath tub caused a jarring shift in the whole chapter that felt really odd, though I guess that's how it felt for Pixie too. Either way, it was a good way to showcase Valentina's power and give us insight into her heritage.
I mentioned it to kintsugi above, but this was meant to be the part where I lay out both her struggle and her Mary Sue Classic abilities. And her willingness to self harm. Honestly I should probably add that content warning in the first post since that probably won't be the last time she puts the dagger in her body.

Interlude
The Interlude...kind of changes things a bit but it also puts things in context. I was wondering what it was that Valentina had to do that she would get Pixie, originally I thought it was just a normal journey but it seems like it's for a TV show instead. Interestingly enough this reminds me of what 8ES did with its Reality Stars supporting cast, so I'm curious to see what you do with a similar concept.
This is based upon that. I thought it was an altogether fascinating concept that wasn't really explored in that story. What would happen if you got some kids of journey age together and then started filming while trying to manipulate them into fitting some fun narratives.

I like how you showcase this board meeting as some skype call between a bunch of people with different views on what they want for the show, as well as the ways in which they try and craft their own lies for it. It sheds a light on some of the things going on in the background, like the entertainment industry for this world, which is a lot like ours admittedly. I wonder how alike the characters will be in reality to the role that the producers want to make for them and what awaits Valentina and Pixie in turn.
It's a lot like ours. And, once again, the producers only know and care about their external behavior and how they've pitched themselves, plus the unconfidential notes from one session with a child psychologist. They. Know. Nothing.

Also, is this gonna be a reality tv show then? or is it going to be like a proper show?
Reality show airing with a slight time delay to in-universe events.
 
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droppin' a review right before you update AWWW YEAHHHH

I didn't make a lot of notes when reading this, honestly. I caught myself stopping at a few points and thinking, "Wow, this writing style is gorgeous," because your second person is perfect. It flows well and the wording is spot on and Pixie is even more adorable, which I didn't think was possible. She's a wild lil mix of defiant and affectionate, and the dynamic with Valentina is interesting. I did feel that the mention of psychic powers came a little out of left field, but it's not really surprising, given your other works. And I agree with the others that I wasn't sure why Valentina was qualified to pick Pixie even with her disability. Might've also been a nice detail, I think, to go into what hurdles people who are blind have to go through typically to get a guide 'mon like Pixie. I did like that you explained when and why Valentina would need Pixie to guide her, though.

“She moved around her owner’s things when she was asleep (it had been hilarious), kept falling asleep during the day (the Sun is far too hot to be a Moonsleeper), kept making her master’s bed cold (your body is cold and the nest she gave you was unfit for sleeping in) and peed on their carpet, even though she’s been housebroken (she’d given you a bath).”

You'd think the parenthetical dialogue would break the flow of things, but nope, it just adds more flavor and more PIXIE. :3

The vulpix are messengers and assistants of the gods, keeping temples safe and laws upheld in the times of their absence. Maybe that obligates you to care for their children. But she feels just like an ordinary mammal, and she’s a warm body to curl up against. A warm body that picked you out in spite of all logic to the contrary.

The contrast between cold and warm is sweet and does well to emphasize Pixie's dynamic with Valentina ughhh. I'm... not really used to seeing you write two characters that get along well, but you write them nicely, too!

“Miss, we have much better behaved lillipup (youngfluffs), growlithe (stripepups), electrike (yellowkits) rockruff (stonedogs) and eevee (assholes) to pick from.

Poor eevee. ;) I do like that you clarify what each species' name from Pixie's worldview is. They're not only adorable, but also add a nice realistic flare to things.

“You… understood that?”

Skysong laughs. She does that a lot, thankfully.

“I’m good at languages, and one of the other villagers had a fox pet.”

You have no idea how to respond to that.

“Don’t tell anyone about it, please. I wouldn’t die to keep the secret, but I don’t want it to go public.”

Don't want it to go public, huh...? It'd be a shame if, you know, IT GOT PUT ON TV.

Nah, but this is a simple yet effective explanation at things. I've said it already, but you write their dynamic well. You didn't need them to understand each other's words to do that, and I imagine that no language barrier will lead to some interesting conversations.

One of your first lessons after Team Skull was that humans bare their teeth as a sign of friendship. Perhaps it is a signal that, yes, I have sharp weapons at hand but I would happily let you disarm me if you wished. Or a reminder of how much they are not biting the other person?

Looool, of course she'd misconstrue something as innocent as a smile. Methinks she's gonna learn a lot of stuff like this about the world with Valentina.

They can’t smell as many things, though. None of the humans seem to. And none seem to think they’re missing out on anything. You wonder how they possibly keep track of all the humans they have to deal with without the benefit of scents. Or how they gauge how someone is really feeling. Do they have to be told? And can people just lie about that? What would be the benefit of lying there? A dominance display, perhaps. Appearing aloof and untouchable by rivals and bad luck.

That must be so lonely.

And even when you're writing from a vulpix's point of view rather than a human's, things like this can feel so relatable to bridge the gap.

You know some ‘mons can do things like that, but humans can’t. They’re very breakable. So breakable, in fact, that other creatures need to do their fighting for them.

Savage line lol. But so true.

Evans: He looks like a lil’ edgelord.

Freeman: He can be confrontational or withdrawn.

Evans: That’s psych speak for “edgelord,” right?

Hell yeah it is.

You'd asked me for a little help on the script portion of this, and the formatting looks good! Easy to follow things. The only suggestion I'd have is to give more detail on stage directions, like these:

Evans and Sasaki laugh


There's not a lot of them at all, and usually, they're written as fragmented sentences with punctuation at the end.

Don't have much to say on the show aspect itself at the moment. Once it starts meshing it more with the actual chapters, it'll be interesting to see just how badly Valentina/Pixie's lives are exploited for the sake of reality TV. Can't say I expect a psychic human and a stubborn af Alolan!Vulpix to take that kind of shit lying down.
 
Production HQ
CharacterSketchGirlAndVulpix.png

image credit to golden3point14. Check out their stuff here and here.
Image description: Valentina sleeping on a floormat, with a blanket and Pixie on top of her.

Chapter One: Iki Town
Pt 1: Alolan Service Pokemon Institute


“Valentina.”

You hadn’t realized you’d fallen asleep at Skysong’s backpaws. You open your eyes and slowly uncurl before kicking yourself up onto your paws (slowly, so no one notices your nap).

“Hello.” Your trainer responds in the kind of tone that’s somewhere between a statement and a question. You almost have human communication patterns down by now, but that one still confuses you. Why don’t humans have a verbal question signifier? You can’t even imagine conversing with another vulpix without ever using the inquiry growl.

You raise your head up to look at the new human and—oh. Their falsefur is very pretty. Nearly pure white. It doesn’t look fluffy but you can see that all the strands are woven very well and you want to touch it. But he’s standing up on his backpaws and the lower part of his falsefur is a not-as-pretty brown and you’ve also been told not to do it. It’s also not as good as real vulpix fur.

“Hello, Valentina. Kenneth Weiss. It’s nice to finally meet you in person.”

Skysong relaxes and uncrosses her legs. You have to move a little bit to avoid getting hit. Not that it would’ve hurt that much, but it would have been very undignified.

“Oh! Yes. Thank you for letting me on to the show.” Your trainer stands and extends a forepaw. She doesn’t come close to striking the man and he intercepts, grabs it and… moves it up and down. In a way that can’t be for either combat or navigation. Huh. The humans taught you how to do it very early on but you didn’t think they did it to each other. Who is going to give treats to whom?

There is no treat exchange, it turns out. Instead the man drops Skysong’s hand and takes a step back. “Can we move to my office? I can help you there or—” You make a point of stepping forward, tightening the leash. He is not her guide fox; you are her guide fox.

“I think Pixie has get it. Thank you for the offer, though.”

It turns out that his daycave isn’t that far away. Maybe fifty of your body lengths. The human probably could have handled it. But you’ll still walk Skysong back out on principle.

“Please, sit.”

Your trainer folds herself down into the seat and the leash goes slack. You take the opportunity to tuck your legs under your body and fluff out your fur to cover them, like you have no limbs but your six-point-one tails. It must confuse the humans, suddenly unsure where your legs went but too intimidated to ask.

“I hate to get straight to business, but it’s going to be a busy day. You have read—reviewed the contract, correct?”

“Most of it was read to me. Is it possible that I could get an audio copy of it? For future reference.”

“Of course. That can be arranged. I’m only asking because there is a clause about seeking showrunner approval for body modifications, including haircuts and dyes.”

Skysong gives off a distress scent and crosses her legs, moving them quickly enough you again have concerns about whether you need to move further away from her.

“It’s not important, for now. We haven’t done the final photoshoots and introductory clips yet. You haven’t even set your wardrobe yet, which is one of our main concerns with that rule. Our wardrobe department will help you pick those quite shortly, actually.”

“…so, I have not been punished yet?”

The man laughs. It’s… different than Skysong’s. Hers is cold and sharp, one clear, flowing sound. His takes up more audiospace, lasts longer and hits you in many different ways rather than a single striking one. It’s not better or worse just… different. Still good. Name worthy? Yes. Snowfire. Cold falsefur and a warm voice.

“No, no. Not getting punished. We don’t really do that. There are rules on us, you know. Now, inside of the game? There might be times when there will be challenges laid out, or times when there will be one winner or one loser between the three of you. But if you ever feel like you’ve been unfairly or excessively punished we would be happy to hear you out. There is a slight time delay between the filming of events and the release. Enough time to edit out things that shouldn’t be televised or resolve situations where the showrunners made a mistake.”

There’s a pause as Skysong shifts in her seat. She taps a foot against the ground while keeping her legs crossed, which prompts you to finally get up and move.

“I think I understand. Could you repeat it again? I’m sorry. English is a little new.”

She seemed to understand you well enough. You don’t tend to speak in long winded speeches like that, though. What’s the point? Any idea can be explained by the right posture, growl and ten words.

Snowfire repeats his ramble and Skysong absentmindedly uncrosses her legs and rests her backpaws on the floor. You still won’t go any closer. Not until you’ve given her your six words and a growl on proper paw swinging etiquette.

“Ok. Thank you,” Skysong says.

“Good. Now. I mostly brought you here to discuss the cameras. Filming starts today, but you can retreat to your room at the Pokémon Center if you want privacy. I think it would be a good idea to stay out with the cameras to get used to them before other stressors are added to the mix, but I understand that they unnerve some people.”

“Oh. Can you, can you clarify about the cameras. When they’ll be on and where and, um, are there breaks?”

You shift and push your front paws forward. Why will there be lightboxes? You love lightboxes because you look beautiful, but you weren’t under the impression most traveling humans had lightboxes following them.

“Hmm. I suppose you didn’t thoroughly read the contract? It doesn’t matter. There will be cameras in your room at Iki Town, but not the bathroom. When cameras are on they’ll be virtually everywhere, all the time. But they’ll be off about as much as they’re on. We only follow one contestant at once, so if you want fewer cameras on you it’s a good idea to split up.

“Split up in eleven days, anyway. We’re going to make you stay together that long, and then you can make decisions on your own.”

…that’s a lot of lightboxes. Even you can’t be flawless every second of the day.

“Even with Dr. Freeman?”

“Oh. No. Never with her. That’s quite confidential, so long as you want it to be. And even if you do approve her sharing information with the showrunners we would never film it.”

Doctor Freeman? There was attachment when she said that name. Who is this human? If she a threat to y—to Skysong?

“And we don’t go out of the way to embarrass our contestants. Once again, there are rules and laws on us. We’ll do our best to cast you in the best light we can, and almost all of the footage we get will never see a television screen.”

“I think I understand.”

Snowfire smiles and you shudder reflexively. He shows a lot of his teeth and it’s unbearably large. Even if he’s talking to a human who can’t see it.

“Good, good. Do you have any further questions?”

“I, not at this time, no?”

“Alright. I’ll hand you over to Mr. Sasaki, then.” Snowfire stands and walks towards the door, putting a hand on Skysong’s shoulder on the way. He pulls the door open and another human steps through. An adult, probably a little bit past peak fertility. Short mane and a relatively short stature. His falsefur is a vibrant red with many smaller dark red patterns inside of it, like he’s wearing several different messily consumed kills he’s never cleaned out.

When you are allowed to bark you will inform Skysong how disgusting this human—this Corpsefur—is.

Corspefur bends down and extends his paw to Skysong’s upper foreleg. “Hello.”

Skysong flinches at the touch, which winds up putting her paw close to Corpsefur’s. She tepidly extends hers and shakes paws with him. And no treats are exchanged.

“My name’s Haru. I’m in charge of wardrobe. Walk with me?”

“Oh. Um, sure.”

Skysong stands and you step forward to pull the leash taut. Corsefur sticks his paws back into his pockets (gross) and walks towards the door briskly, leaving you and Skysong behind. You try and match his pace without ripping the leash out of Skysong’s paw, but he’s an annoyingly fast walker for a human.

“Your hair. It’s different from the photos I was given.”

Skysong stops and you trip over your paws when the leash unexpectedly snaps taut around your back.

“I. I knew now that I wasn’t supposed to but I didn’t know then and—”

Corpsefur waves his paw to dismiss her. Skysong can’t see it (obviously), so she continues her apology until the stupid, horrific man takes the hint.

“It doesn’t matter. You plan on keeping it?”

“For a while, at least, yes.”

“Cool. Where’d you get it done? It would help keep it maintained if that same stylist could fix it. Rather complex dye job with the layers and all. Easy to botch, hard to fix.”

“I—I don’t remember. Pixie found a place. She seems to think it’s very good. The hair, not the place. I don’t actually know how she found that but—”

Corpsefur is frowning and his upper legs are drawn across his chest, together and tense. The human equivalent of fur puffed and teeth bared.

“Fine. Tell me if you remember any details, alright? Otherwise we’ll just need to dye it something completely different later on when it starts to fade. Something like that won’t look very good when the colors have died down and it gets tangled and messy.”

Like he would know a single thing about fur maintenance.

He resumes walking and you try to pull a little bit more to get Skysong’s attention. It’s unnecessary; she hears his footsteps and follows on her own, leaving you to scramble a little bit to get the leash fully extended again.

The room he leads you into is full of falsefurs on racks, accompanied by golden ice pieces and—wait. Are those false manes? Or real manes they ripped off of a head and put together for another human to wear? You will need to sniff them to be sure but that’s genuinely twisted. Did pulling off the manes produce the blood on his falsefur? You didn’t think it was real, just some poorly chosen pattern, but you’re starting to get very nervous about this entire situation.

You puff yourself up and start chilling the air in your fur, just to be safe.

“Now, your new hairstyle. It’s good for a few reasons. It makes you stand out automatically, compared to the other two. Marks you as a little bit different. Not fully in line with society’s expectations of a good, miniature adult. That describe you?”

There’s a long pause as Skysong processes the rapidfire blurring of words that had just been spit at her.

“I like following rules, if that’s what you’re asking?”

“Hmm. No. But it’s good we established that out of the gate. Why did you get it, anyway? Wouldn’t expect a blind girl to spend whatever that cost on hair coloring.”

Skysong’s face twitches for a moment, as if preparing for a verbal pounce. But she relents and puts one of her lower legs behind the other, leaning back on it a little bit while her face relaxes. A sign of deference to her current alpha.

“My. I mainly worship Chalchuihtlicue. She’s a water goddess but her color is jade so. It was a, um, what’s the word? Gift is wrong, I think.”

“Tribute.” Corpsefur closes the distance to Skysong and picks up some of her hair in his paw, causing your trainer to visibly flinch at the touch. It takes every ounce of your (considerable) strength not to bark at him. “I suppose we could play that angle. Have you explain it in the opening statements later today. Give you more traditional or exotic clothing. Robe-like dresses and the like. It would let you function as an ambassador for your people, play that role on the show.” He drops the hair he was holding and steps back. “I wouldn’t recommend that angle. The violent pantheons are out of fashion after Sootopolis. No. Something else. Nature? You like your fox, and I was led to believe she was near-unlikeable. Did you spend much time outdoors back home?”

He wasn’t the sort of person you would like. That’s for sure.

“Yes. I was on good terms with a pack of, you don’t have the species here, but they’re fox-like. I’m good with pokémon and animals. And I spent a lot of nights outside.”

“That’s definitely something I can work with. Green as shorthand.” He starts moving his paws through the racks of falsefur to find something. He winds up pulling out a dress of a slightly paler green than Skysong’s hair. It’s not repulsive, which leads you to wonder why he dresses like an unhygienic monstrosity when he knows how to identify decent falsefur.

He claps a paw onto Skysong’s back, leading to a much more noticeable flinch. Then he starts pushing as he walks to a door on the side of the room. Skysong awkwardly tries to match his pace and more or less succeeds by the time that Corpsefur stops abruptly at the door and thrusts the dress into her hands. “Would you try that on? I can get an assistant to help if you don’t know how to—”

“I’m quite fine, thank you.” Skysong steps inside and, after a moment of searching for the handle, closes the door behind her, dropping the leash as she does so. You curl up outside and keep a watchful glare on Corpsefur as he sorts through a box, occasionally taking out overhoofs with either a glance or a dismissive toss.

Skysong reenters the room before he’s finished. You pick up the leash in your mouth in case she needs it, but Corpsefur is already standing next to her by the time you’re ready to offer it. He moves around her, looking down and frowning, occasionally stopping to pull on or move part of the falsefur.

The encounter progresses like that for a long while, with Corpsefur bringing Skysong pieces of falsefur and having her try them on. His touches produce progressively smaller flinches, but Skysong’s scent keeps getting more distressed. You aren’t sure if you’re supposed to freeze the man or not. You want to do it, but if you weren’t supposed to it would be awkward. Maybe awkward enough to lead to your rejection. You keep curled up on the sidelines.

There’s only one piece of falsefur that the humans argue about. It’s a pair of legsheathes. They’re a pretty, faded blue but the main feature is that they’re covered in rips, tears and grass stains. The bottom third is ripped off altogether a little bit haphazardly, like another canine was allowed to play with them aggressively for an afternoon.

Which sounds like a lot of fun.

Skysong runs a paw over them, getting a sense of the texture. “They’re already damaged?”

“Yes; it fits with the aesthetic I’ve been going for. Loose, airy clothing. A lot of green, some reds and pale blues. Fits with the nature vibe.”

“But all the other clothing was… good?”

“This will look good, too, with some modifications. It’s about making things that seem bad or worn but are actually quite functional and visually appealing.”

“Then, can I wear my old boots?”

Corpsefur snorts.

“See, those are actually destroyed. Those jeans? Breathable fabric, symmetric messes, surprisingly functional. The old stuff you sent pictures of? It’s actual trash. Trust me, it’s not the impression you want to send.”

Skysong holds her mouth open and twitches a finger, like there’s something she wants to say in response. But she closes her mouth, still visibly unhappy, and picks up the falsefur.

“You don’t need to actually try it on. That was meant for another contestant, but we decided to go in a different direction. It’d be way too big on you. Too masculine, too.”

“I… ok.”

“I’ll get you the rest of the clothing tomorrow, before we leave up to Iki. Going to try and find some sort of a jade or emerald trinket, too, to give you something iconic. In the meantime,” he thrusts a small stack of falsefur into Skysong’s chest, causing her to reflexively step back and grab it. “I want you to put this on. When you’re done another staffer will apply your makeup for the day. When you’re on camera, it’s best to have at least something on to adjust for the lighting.”

“I can do my own makeup,” Skysong asserts.

“Yeah, well, it would look like a blind girl did it. Trust me on this one, you don’t want the audience to see you as a punchline.”

Skysong takes a long, deliberate breath before turning around to enter the side room one final time. When she emerges, you dutifully hand her the leash and her old overhoofs. She pointedly leaves the latter behind, leaving Corpsefur to clean up the mess.

Once you get out of the room, your trainer orders you to find a bathroom. You do so by scent and take her to it. She leaves you outside of a smaller privacy cage again, this time on a rather disgusting white stone surface. You head over to furniture in the room and curl up on it. The cloth still smells bad, but not horrifically so.

Two other humans walk in and out before Skysong finally comes out of her cage. You don’t think she actually urinated or defecated in that time.

You reach Skysong as she’s washing her paws. When she’s finished you brush the leash against her leg, reminding her you’re there. She doesn’t take it. Instead she reaches down and picks you up instead. She repeatedly clicks her tongue against the roof of her mouth and walks towards the exit. Right before she reaches the door, Skysong stops and turns towards the furniture you’d been resting on. “That a couch?” she asks.

You affirm and she sits down. You earn some absentminded strokes, a little less high quality than the ones from yesterday. “Is something wrong?”

She doesn’t answer beyond a slow shake of her head. Without saying a word, she picks up the leash and leaves the cage.

You find your way to the cage she was told to go to. Your trainer sits in a chair and gets powder and liquid put onto her face while she continues to sit in silence, offering only a single word of thanks at the very end. Then she tells you to head for the training room.

You ask her again if anything’s wrong. This time she responds.

“Nothing happened. He just reminds me of someone. That’s all.” She slows down briefly and you turn to look at her. She shakes her head and repeats, “That’s all.”

You highly doubt that she’s told you it all. And that bothers you because what you don't know could be anything. Could be hate. But you don’t want to push her out of her comfort zone. Don’t want to push her away. Not unless you're sure she doesn't love you.

You keep walking.

*​

She talks to Snowfire again. There are many stretched smiles and bared teeth and laughs that don’t sound quite like her real one. Yet her glands slowly stop begging for help. And by the end her laughter sounds like her name.

*​

“I’m terribly sorry about that. Just, with the show starting, it’s been a lot going on.”

“It’s fine.” Skysong laughs. “I just want some practice with her before I leave the city.”

Matriarch glances at you. You keep to grooming your fur, and you find yourself radiating more cold than usual. Matriarch admitted a mistake and now she has to watch you with a trainer who isn’t allowed to abandon you.

“Of course. That can be arranged for a while today. And more over the coming days, until you feel you’re comfortable with her. You’ve never had a seeing eye dog, right?”

“No, ma’am.”

“Hmm. For some reason I thought you had… well, that’s a reminder to double check everything, I suppose. Follow me, I’ll find someone to help you.”

*​

There’s an obstacle course after that. The same one you went through with Hummy and have gone through with many of the humans in the facility as a training run, either for yourself or the younger pups watching. You find that it’s much easier when she can hear your verbal commands, and you can use short breaks to explain to her what different tightnesses on the leash mean, or what a quick tug to the side indicates. She stares off into the distance, not reacting except to offer her hand, like your mewing simply indicated you wanted petting.

Which you do, of course. Even if that’s not the main thing you’re trying to communicate.

*​

It’s not something you’d really noticed until she tried to ignore you, but her posture is uncannily controlled for a human. She sits bolt upright, head facing forward with her legs tightly folded against each other and either the floor or her lap, almost never moving anything beyond the small signs of breath.

It seems rather draining for a resting state. You mix yours up between sitting on your legs, splaying yourself out on the ground, curling up, lying on your side and holding your feet together and curling up with your head on top of your body. And you move a lot to stretch or check the environment. Unless you’re being focused upon. Come to think of it, Skysong has no idea whether or not anyone’s paying attention to her. Ever.

You make a mental note to discuss a cue with her so she’ll know when she’s being watched or there are lighboxes around. Which there are now. Have been through the entire course. You don’t know if she knows, so you tell her. You don’t expect her to respond, but she whispers under her breath, “Of course there are,” so low that only you can hear it. The tone is the closest thing she’s ever given you to a rebuke.

You stifle a whimper and avert your gaze until the end of the break.

*​

It takes the remainder of the morning and the bulk of the afternoon to finish Skysong’s training. There are a few breaks (with progressively less tension as your trainer’s mood lifts). One break had food; you got a cheri berry with your foodrocks. It was very good.

When Skysong has learned what she wants to you leave the institute with her. No lightboxes follow.

“There a beach we could go to?” Skysong asks.

You can hear the waves and smell the salt from the institute. You can sense them throughout most of the city, in fact. The humans are land creatures but they prefer to mark their territory as close to the water as they can.

It is a quick walk, albeit a crowded and busy one for a rather small fox guiding a somewhat small human.

*​

Skysong removes her overhoofs at the edge of the water and tosses them back a bodylength or two.

“Watch those, will you?”

You take a moment to walk over to them and organize them in the sand before you return to her and begin your sentry duty on her lap. There’s a long period of quiet after as your trainer seems to absorb the sound of the waves and the brush of the seawater against her body. The sea sometimes brushes up into her falsefur as it breaks down and forms a thin skin against the sand before slowly receding into the earth and sea once more. It’s never high enough to reach you.

As time wears on and the noises on the beach begin to quiet as humans go indoors for their evening meal, Skysong finally speaks.

“I said I would explain things. My mother. The gods. I’ll try, but I’m very new to all of this. I’ve spoken to my mother once and after that, well, things started happening really quickly and I haven’t had much time to really think about everything. Maybe that’s for the best…”

You shift and look up to her. She can’t see it, but you think it’s considered polite to look at humans when you’re listening to them. It feels right, anyway.

“Um. So. There used to be the Anahuac gods. They’re a little bit violent. And they ask for things from people to keep providing harvests and sunlight. I think it’s fair; other people don’t think so. Some of those people came over with guns and unknown types of pokémon. They tried to poison the water. Unite the other, smaller tribes around the Anahuac. The tribes that the Anahuac had fought for—for blood to offer the gods so that there kept being food and sunlight.

“The invaders, the coyōtl, they and their gods tried to take over all of Mexico. And the Anahuac gods wanted more blood to fight them off. But we had to. The coyōtl,” she pauses and her face scrunches up, “they did very bad things. Killed for the fun of killing and conquest. Hurt people because they could…

“My father was a sailor. Half Anahuac. He met my mother and she gave him a child. He moves inland to take care of me. For over a decade. Then my mother came back a week ago. She took me here and gave me my gifts and arranged for me to be in the show so I would have money and people looking after me. I’m grateful to her. Grateful for you. Does that answer your questions?”

No. It doesn’t. Not all of them.

“You really don’t need to be worshipped? Or, am I supposed to protect you?”

A tiny wave crests high and hits you right in the face. You grimace and try to shake some of it off.

Skysong giggles. It almost makes the whole thing worth it.

“No. I’m not a goddess. But I would like protecting. Not because of her,” she motions towards the sea, “but because you’re my guide fox.”

“And is your father still in Mexico?”

Skysong’s heart skips half a beat. It takes her another dozen dozens of beats for her to answer.

“He’s not here.”

She slowly pulls herself up and runs a hand through her falsefur, driving some of the sand out. The dampness seems to fade from it a moment later.

You open your mouth to apologize, only to stop as the wind twists into a quiet voice.

Leave her be.


***
To be continued on May 8, 2018
 
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Though I couldn't quite make a mental image of Kenneth or Haru from the descriptions Pixie gives us, I have to say her questioning of inquiry growls and handshakes had me giggling like a guy who just remembered a really funny joke in the middle of the office. I think that's part of why I like this second person style. Even if I can't visualize what's going on, Pixie's thoughts are quite amusing. And she's gotten rather prideful of her position with Skysong. Sounds like a far cry from where she started. As for Kenneth, it's interesting that Pixie has an... okay opinion of him. Because his little explanation made me quite nervous. As in, I was interpreting things like "Enough time to edit out things that shouldn't be televised" as "enough time to manipulate the footage to suit our own storylines and attract more viewers." And, of course, the threat of constant cameras aside from the bathroom combined with the remark about no piercings or alternations makes me absolutely convinced that some of the self-harm stuff we've seen will shine through eventually.

Again, Pixie's reactions to Haru/Corpsefur are good for a laugh. She's a judgmental little vixen, clearly. And that goes on the more Corpsefur tries to create a character for Skysong. Which feels really weird to read, but I have no insight into production processes, so I'm not gonna judge. It's skeevy in a good way, I suppose. Also, some of her confusion about human wardrobes is also cute and handled pretty well considering we can't just read the minds of animals and find out what they think of wigs. And I like the lengths you go to display Pixie's innate desire to protect Skysong from a stressful stimulus (Corpsefur) but having enough higher-order restraint to avoid doing that. And an interesting tease with the conversation about Corpsefur reminding Skysong of someone. No real guesses on that, so I guess I'm-a be surprised.

I guess the last bit is on the backstory. I still have a few personal questions that I'm guessing will get answered later. But as it stands it's interesting. There has to be some sort of reasoning behind Skysong's arrival in Alola, but I have no idea what it is. Maybe I can piece more of it together going forward.

For some reason, I noticed that this chapter jumps between past and present tense for the narration a lot. I... can't seem to remember the other chapters doing that, but my memory kind of sucks. It just stuck out this time and I can't tell you why. Sorry! ;~;
 
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