Fair point. I was never one of the cool kids so I'm deaf to that sort of thing.
I personally was A cool kid, even though I wasn't one of the cool kids, if that makes any sense. Idly, that's where Nori's social status was partially inspired from: someone just about everyone likes, although he has few (if any) real friends and about the worst luck in retaining any due to external factorsYou and me both, dude.
I'll abstain from answering this one just yet.I was afraid he'd just run away on his own.
He is! He went in a completely different direction than I expected him to.*Lux's dad seems pretty great.
She is! She also went in a very different direction. See some of my response to Juliko for that.*His mother not so much.
It was a minor scene that I ended up getting carried away with, but I liked the result. And yeah, know exactly what you mean. Sometimes the dreaming world is much more pleasant than the real one.*Saw the dream coming. I've had a similar experience of a wonderful dream leaving an empty feeling after waking up.
Well then I'll point out a couple tiny details you missed or didn't mention:Well, we have answers more or less what I was expecting after the previous chapter. There isn't a ton for me to say, I'm afraid.
No problem, glad you enjoyed them. Reminds me I should read the second part sometime.Thanks for sharing those behind the scenes notes! It's something I'd like to do with my fic (there are a lot of things that have changed over the writing process, per usual, even some scenes written out that won't make it in but exist in text form).
Now this actually ties into Daren's comment from earlier. Lux actually DID do so in the original draft, provoking his parents into moving through some way for Nori's sake. Then I thought that was too severe. So I made it his mom's doing, amping her up from "selfish and controlling yet not completely unreasonable" to "actually evil" in the process.Copied from FFN: Called it. Totally called it. I absolutely KNEW that Lux wouldn't have spent that much time away from Nori for that long of his own volition. I knew his mother was an overzealous control freak, but to actually lock her son in his room for a whole day, confine him to the house, and basically keep him prisoner.
You mentioned Caiseal from your own fic a couple times. Earlier things weren't intentional, but in this case I very much WAS with him in mind and actively thinking how I could top his parents. Most of which is in the future, but one thing: Hikari is very much in control of her actions, compared to Caiseal's mom who implicitly (my interpretation at least) went insane.Would unlawful imprisonment of a child be considered endangering the welfare of a child? Because it's pretty clear Hikari is an abusive bitch, not just to Lux, but to her husband.
Yuuuuup.I know there's an actual real life case of a guy imprisoning his daughter in his house for her entire childhood that happened back in the 70s, and this admittedly gave me flashbacks to that, though not nearly as severe, but since Lux's case isn't anywhere near that level, I am concerned about what this will entail for his future.
Heh heh heh. Please choose your response.Plus, the foster care system in and of itself isn't perfect, and I hope to Arceus that Lux isn't stuck with an abusive family. The kid deserves a break for once!
It's implicitly implied that Hikari has some sort of influence or connections. Or maybe she's just that annoying to deal with and they'd rather not. And yes, they didn't cave to the League, but they did to her. Over something more minor than telling them how to run their school, but it stands out. Maybe because the League won't make their life a living hell if they won't listen?Also, what exactly did Hikari tell the school? Did she convince them that Lux was in the hospital or on vacation? Because a child being absent from school for a whole week without a valid explanation is considered a huge deal.
A very sad fact. There's actually a line addressing this in mid-April, pointing out that not only can they be just as bad, those incidents tend to be overlooked because of an assumptive standard. And although I don't go into this part about it - even though it fits theme of image - a lot goes unreported by men because of potentially compromising their masculinity by it being revealed a woman is taking advantage of them.Also, as you showed with Hikari, domestic abuse isn't just limited to a husband beating his wife, as women and wives can be abusers as well.
You uh probably missed or forgot the last scene where it was revealed it all just a dream. Nothing on March 21st actually happened. Nothing changed about Lux's situation, with only despair and some arousal* to show for it.I'm also wondering just how the hell Nori managed to find Lux and convince the gym trainers to help them. Considering that I still absolutely don't trust them at all, I'm honestly hoping Nori wasn't forced to do anything really humiliating or degrading to achieve everything that he did.
Even worse. He's in super jackass mode right now.Ugh. Just when I was actually starting to like Volkner, you have him go right back into jackass mode.
Very petty indeed. A bit more on why exactly Volkner dislikes Flint will be covered later! And as for Flint training Nori, well, to reply to this a bit early since it's related...At this point, I'm wondering why Flint isn't the one training Nori. He's actually nice to him! What even is Volkner's deal with Flint? Does he hate Flint that much? At this point, Volkner's just being petty.
So making a further remark on this one: the reason this amused me when you mentioned it, as now revealed, there's actually indeed someone else who Nori could've been sent to. Granted it's Flint, not Byron. And as you may have noticed, Nori is a way better fit for Flint, and Sofie is arguably a way better fit for Volkner. It makes you think, doesn't it?*"Hopeless". Starting to think they should have sent Nori to Byron.
Sometimes you can be right yet wrong about something at the same time. And of course as you once mentioned, saying 'live with it' is never the way to go.Even if everyone does have a point about Nori's worry for Lux starting to control him, that in no way justifies their attitudes toward him, especially not Volkner's.
Glad you liked it. It was in-part for that, but also in-part fluff to show how the Gym Trainers act off-duty and when Nori isn't involved, explain their mood/motivations, and explore that bit of backstory. As for Radovan, I have no comment on whether or not it's a hook for something later.I will admit I did like hearing about Tono's backstory a bit and wondering who this Radovan person is that he's convinced Nori is so much like.
Is this intended as a callout of the anime, or just a coincidence?They'd focus so much on catching new Pokemon, they forgot to train their partners who'd been with them longer.
Not good. He needs some sort of help immediately or he'll be potentially stuck in this death spiral.Now he couldn't think of anything but his problems, no matter how hard he tried not to.
It was a fun scene to write. Was trying to make it ambiguous if a little confusing as to what was going on while being vague. Like "wait what's going on" and "oh it's just a video game"*I'd recognize a narrative description of the final battle in Super Mario Bros. 3 anywhere.
Funny, it was intended as a bit of in-character ranting (partially miming my own opinions) that expands the universe and characters a bit, but I was able to easily pivot it into the main talk. It was fun coming up with an idea as to why they might exist in the actual world, however.*Getting a tiny bit meta with that discussion of the old Pokémon ganes -_^.
Coincidence, nothing intended from it. Just philosophical talk about training mentalities.Is this intended as a callout of the anime, or just a coincidence?
Just keep in mind that two of the similarities he mentioned are 'has red eyes' and 'has a Nido'. He's more than likely exaggerating to himself; his perception might not actually be what is.*So Tono had someone somewhat similar to Nori as an old enemy.
To be fair, she backed off when she learned Nori was too young. Although to be fair to creepy, old enough is younger than most would expect, but I'm not pursuing that beyond that, to clarify. The fact that she went for Nori instead of any of the guys though, and given what they didn't want him doing...*Sorta creepy there, Miss Sofie
Yuuup.*Volkner being a jerk again. Flint really brings out his worst.
It was a Houndour at first, for clarification. It takes surprisingly little effort to evolve into Houndoom: lv24 if I remember correctly. Probably could've done that in one and a half to two and a half months of working at it.*Pachirisu Vs Houndoom feels like a bit of a mismatch. Flint giving out a rather easier to use "starter" than Volkner.
I mean they're not flat jackasses. They think for themselves, and all have some motivation when they act up. Similarly when they see Volkner is being extremely petty, they have enough of a conscience (and maybe empathy) to put their own grudges aside. It's the same principal that made Volkner ease up when the Gym Trainers started acting up.*Volkner's gotten so bad even the Gym Trainers are sympathetic.
I actually made the point of this more clear at first, but decided it was too clunky. Reread that part again though, and you might get an idea of where I might be going with it. If not, wait two chapters.*So they may have found one of Arceus' plates...
He was actually trying on purpose. Being kind of a jerk in how he went about it, but just enough not of one for Nori to listen and get the message.*Ollie accidentally saves the day.