- Joined
- Jun 3, 2013
- Messages
- 1,465
- Reaction score
- 1,604
- Pronouns
- He/Him
- They/Them
- Thread starter
- #21
Heya Namo!! As always thanks for the review regardless of what brought you back to it. While a small review and not really much to comment on, I will say what I can about your comments.
Anyways, once again thanks for the review and comments on the fic. Hope you'll come back once I stop procrastinating and get more chapters out as soon as I can!!
Quick confusion here for me, are you referring to work as in her job at her father's repair shop or her work in general? I'm going to say it is the former and I will just say while you might think it's minor, there's much joy in knowing what you people won't expect.I will say that it seems interesting that you're setting up a potential minor conflict with Cecilia and her previous work.
Yeah, while I say Chapter 5 is a bit more exposition-ny, it's more about characters and I will be starting to go into more detail of Cecilia's past and some of her actions regarding said past.It's sort of hard to tell where it's coming from, but I do think that her past, with how often it's being mentioned, is going to find a way to catch up to her eventually somehow. With how often it comes up, that seems to be the only logical conclusion to be made.
Yeah really need to work on my grammar, it's probably always going to be a problem for me. Hopefully I can get past it but trying my best.I think overall there are a few mechanical things that you can probably take a look at, in terms of grammar. There were a few times where the punctuation was a little confusing.
Legitimately did not know this was a thing, never got taught this in Creative Writing nor seen it to be frank, though I could've been subconsciously reading it like I write it.Related to this, even if there's a comma at the end of a piece of dialogue or a question mark or exclamation point, you begin the next sentence with a lowercase if it's a dialogue tag or a sentence fragment that follows the line of dialogue. Only capitalize after dialogue if it isn't a dialogue tag and is a complete sentence.
Yeah, hoping to get past some of that in Chapter 5 and 6 is where things will start moving on hopefully for me.What I'm hoping to see from chapter 5 onward is some rising action. Right now, I'm not really seeing much of that. It definitely needs to have some sense of conflict and not just some person going to do a job and deliveries. With four chapters of exposition, you're definitely able to do the rising action now. The stage is set! Let's see the core plot!
Anyways, once again thanks for the review and comments on the fic. Hope you'll come back once I stop procrastinating and get more chapters out as soon as I can!!