COMPLETE: [Teen] Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Unequivocant

[lucarioknight56]

Alright, another announcement! I've been having a bit of trouble visualizing how I want to go with the first few chapters of Act 4, so I decided to try something I haven't yet done for Equivos: making a map! I'll post them both here for everyone to see, as well as on the table of contents for reference! I hope you enjoy!

Spoiler: Core Map

Spoiler: Act 2~3 Character Path Map

_ _ _ : Lawrence's Path (Act 2)
x x x : Gardner's Path (Act 2)
_ . _ : Cassia's Path (Act X)
. . . : Lawrence's Path (Act 3)​

 

[lucarioknight56]

Chapter 19: Ascendance

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

Lawrence stirred, wiping the fur on his face.

Drip.

Lawrence groaned, wiping away more. He opened his eyes, grouchily staring above him.

“Grom.”

Lawrence flinched and slid away from the source, feeling moist earth underneath him. He stared upward again and found Grom leaning over him and staring. Water dripped from his head and rolled down his shoulders, steaming upon entering the various cracks along his body.

The Lucario sat upright, causing Grom to step back. He looked about and saw palm trees stretching high into the sky, their trunks and roots overcrowding the ground beneath them. Cawing over the distant rush, Toucannon swooped down from the canopy and pinched nuts off branches, their child Trumbeak warbling after them. Liepard lurked through the branches, keeping a watchful eye on the Emolga that drifted and chittered on the wind.

The Golurk pointed behind Lawrence, his eyes flashing. “Groawm.” The foot of the Xilo Mountains stretched in front of them, far higher than any of the trees. A mighty waterfall cascaded down the slope, fanning out to a wide sheet of rushing water. It expanded outward into a pool, which funneled into a coursing stream, wrapping between the roots and trees. Swanna paddled in the pool, pecking at the Magikarp and Feebas that helplessly swam about. A Zoroark stood at the bank of the pool, holding her shoulder and looking down into the water.

Lawrence looked back to Grom, who nodded his head over to Cassia. Lawrence exhaled slowly, then padded to Cassia, the earth squelching underneath him with each step.

Cassia stared at her reflection in the pool, the water rippling outward with the rushing falls. “You’ve been asleep for a long time.”

“Must have,” Lawrence replied. He marveled at the environment, gazing up at the mist that gathered around the falls. “I’ve never seen anything like this. Where are we?”

“We’re at the fringe of the Faylen Jungle. Grom brought us down here because Matheus was worried that Arthus would catch up with us; he didn’t want him attacking while we were recovering.”

Lawrence spun slowly, searching. “Where is he now?”

Cassia remained staring at the water. “Hunting. He wanted to get us something better than berries to eat.” She combed back her mane, tilting her head. “I…I shouldn’t have broken down like that back in Cryus. I could’ve fought off that Cryogonal if I had been paying attention. We…we nearly died…because of me.” She let go of her mane, watching it fall across her shoulder.

The crashing waves was all that sounded between them. The Swanna flapped out of the pool and into the air, cawing as they went.

Finally, Lawrence said, “It wasn’t your fault; you’ve worried so much that Pokémon would discover you that when it finally happened, you couldn’t stop yourself.”

Cassia shook her head, pulling back her mane. “But I’ve been with them for two years. I should be used to being around them, even if…even if I look normal.” She huffed, closing her eyes. “I don’t belong here. Why should I keep going if no one cares about me?”

Lawrence thought to himself for a moment. He considered what best to say. He crouched to view his reflection in the pool, his fur matted and covered in dirt—well-traveled in comparison to when he first came to Equivos.

“When I moved away from Sinnoh, the first thing I wanted to do was make friends. I joined the university’s most popular club—the Senior Pokémon League—hoping I’d find some people I could be with. And, for a time, I did.” Lawrence passed his paw through the water, watching the water ripple outward. “But they noticed I wasn’t quite like them; ‘I always borrowed Pokémon’, ‘I never said nice things to them’, ‘I always thought of what to do if they turned on me’…” He sighed. “They thought I was too negative, and, well, they found out my thoughts on Pokémon. I didn’t really see them again after that…just like in Sinnoh.”

He looked up to Cassia. “I’d been in slumps before, but after those ‘friends’ left me, it hit me hard. I didn’t know what to do with myself; nobody seemed to like who I was and what I did. I became so hateful of myself that I was willing to do anything to stop it: I prayed to Arceus.” Cassia gave him a surprised look. “There had always been some part of me that thought he was there, that thought that maybe, just maybe, he really did exist.”

He shook his head sadly, looking back at the water. “I didn’t get any answer. No comfort, no words. I just got over it after a while, and after that, I stayed true to who I was. But I never felt…happy. Any hope I had was gone.”

Lawrence stood up, letting the water around his paw drip back into the pool. “You said to me a while back that we’re pretty alike. We’re trying to fit in with those around us, and they end up pushing us away, for one reason or another.”

He held up Cassia’s hand, causing her to look down. “I feel like…like we were meant to meet each other. I was meant to help you, and you were meant to help me.” Cassia looked up once more, her mouth open in astonishment.

Lawrence held up his other paw, allowing it to glow with aura. “I think I got my answer to that prayer. You.” Cassia stared, then beamed.

Lawrence enclosed her other hand. “Don’t say nobody cares about you. I do. I’m always here for you, no matter what happens.”

Cassia exhaled in relief, then embraced Lawrence, falling into his shoulder. He paused for a moment, then embraced her back, closing his eyes.

Moments later, heavy hands wrapped around the couple. They looked up and saw the brightly glowing eyes of Grom shining down on them. “G-G-Graw-haw-haw…”

Cassia giggled and rubbed Grom’s arm. “You always knew, didn’t you?”

Grom reared back his head and chuckled to himself, then winked. He stepped away, and Lawrence and Cassia separated.

The Golurk set a hand on Lawrence’s shoulder, then nodded solemnly. “Gro-graw-graw-grawm. Gra-grawm.”

“What did he say?” Lawrence asked.

Cassia set a hand on his other shoulder. “He said he’s glad to see you’ve changed.”

Grom reached down and squeezed Lawrence, popping his back. The Lucario wheezed and said, “Love you too…big guy.”

The Golurk slowly stepped deeper into the water, causing Cassia to look at him curiously.

He let go of Lawrence.

Ker-splash!

“Grom!” Cassia exclaimed.

“My idea—it was too good to pass up!”

She whipped around and saw Matheus standing on the fringe of the jungle with a large Trumbeak hanging over his shoulder. He waved his paw in front of his nose and said, “We all whiff a little, so Grom volunteered to help.”

Cassia gave him an offended look and said, “What do you mean I—wha!”

Grom picked her up by the waist and threw her near where he dropped Lawrence. Water cascaded into the air, splashing all over Grom and scaring away the fish beneath.

As they both resurfaced, Grom turned back to Matheus, who had set down the Trumbeak and shed his leather clothing.

He gave himself a quick sniff. “High time for me too.” He waded into the water, sighing contentedly.

Cassia coughed, paddling haphazardly. “You know I can’t swim that well, Grom!”

Lawrence paddled on his back, swimming around Cassia. “I can help you out. Want a ride back to shore?” he said with a smile.

Cassia grinned, pushing him away. “In your dreams.” She knocked Lawrence underneath the surface as she rocketed forward.

Lawrence surfaced again and spat out a stream of water. “Oh, it’s on!” He sprung forward, tailing Cassia.

She suddenly turned and splashed Lawrence’s face, laughing. Lawrence sputtered, wiping his eyes. “Foul move!” he cried, blinking.

“All’s fair in love and war, right?” Cassia laughed, swimming around him once more.

The Lucario continued to trail her, both laughing as they went. Matheus watched from afar, sitting on the bank with Grom. “They’ve grown up a little, haven’t they?”

Grom lifted a chunk of dirt from under the water and threw it over his legs, shifting it around.
“Gro-awm?”

Matheus sighed, shaking his head. “Yes, I’m aware that they’re over twenty. Just trying to make a joke is all.”

Grom stared for a moment, then abruptly pushed Matheus forward, sending him face-first into the dirt. The Legend coughed and gagged upon standing up, wiping his now-muddy face.

The Golurk chuckled, pointing at Matheus. “Graw-graw-haw-haw! Graw-haw!”

“First, just because I asked you to do it to Lawrence and Cassia doesn’t mean you can do it to me.” He crouched and rubbed the mud free in the water. Between splashes, he added, “Second, that wasn’t funny.”

Grom grunted, rotating his head away. “Gi-gr-graw.”

Matheus perked up and gave Grom a sideways glance. “Could’ve sworn you said ‘hypocrite’.

The Golurk hummed to himself, pretending not to hear.

Later, Matheus, Lawrence and Cassia huddled around a fire, eating roast Trumbeak flesh and drying themselves, while Grom stood behind them and threw rocks into the pool—some as large as boulders.

Matheus nibbled on a wing and pointed at the roasting bird stuck through with a spit over the fire. “Been a long time since I’ve had Trumbeak. Very sweet flavor, thanks to all the berries they eat.” Lawrence and Cassia heartily agreed, ravenously eating the wild Pokémon.

The Legend lowered the wing, chuckling. “Good thing I got it. You must be starving after being nearly frozen to death by that Cryogonal.”

Cassia swallowed, cocking her head. “How did we survive? I thought they freeze Pokémon to death?”

“For you, I believe it had to do with your stored Life,” Matheus replied. “As its name implies, it likes to keep its host alive. Plus, thanks to its erratic state, it could easily provide enough heat to drive out the cold.”

“What about me?” Lawrence asked.

Matheus grinned. “After further thought, I think yours has to do with Aura. See, they are remarkably similar, even if they’re opposite energies. So, whenever you got your full Aura, it drove out the cold just as Cassia’s Life did.” He put a paw over his heart. “Ah, love melts even the iciest heart. How sappy can it get?”

Cassia edged up to Lawrence. “Guess you made the right choice then.”

Lawrence chuckled, biting into his Trumbeak leg.

After their fur was dry and their stomachs were full, Lawrence and Matheus stood apart from each other in the sand. Cassia sat with Grom on a boulder, sketching the magnificent waterfall and the Swanna that inhabited it.

Matheus smirked. “You’ve been getting better, but you have a long way before you can call yourself a master of Aura.”

“I’ve managed to get the better of you before,” Lawrence remarked.

“Yes, but that was because ‘A’, I let you and ‘B’, I wasn’t using my Aura. Fighting with aura is a whole lot different compared to standard techniques.” The fur on the back of Matheus’ head rose, and his paws glowed cyan. “Let me explain how it works in combat. As you know, Life is an explosive and draining force, seriously damaging any Pokémon it hits.” Matheus raised his arm. “Aura, however, is different. It’s hard to explain, but spheres aside, it exhausts the target’s mental state.

Lawrence cocked his head. “That…doesn’t make sense.”

Matheus groaned. “I told you, it’s hard to explain. To put it simply, it increases your strength, and every time you hit your opponent, it exhausts their mind and spirit—essentially their Life. But unlike draining it, this simply tires them out faster than standard techniques. Catch my drift?”

Lawrence shrugged. “I guess.”

Matheus rubbed his chin, thinking. “Hmm…you need a demonstration…” He grinned. He waved to Lawrence and said, “Come on over here for a moment.”

His student tramped over, giving him a suspicious look. “Why do I feel like this is going to hurt?” He stopped in front of Matheus, eying him warily.

Matheus shook his head. “You have no faith.” He clipped Lawrence across his jaw, knocking him onto his back. “But you were right, it’d hurt.”

Lawrence groaned and stood up, rubbing his face. “I don’t like your ‘demonstrations’.”

Matheus held his paws up in defense. “Sometimes the hard way is the best way!” He narrowed his eyes. “Now…do you feel tired?”

The younger Lucario rolled his shoulder, admittedly feeling that they felt heavier, like he had been lifting something heavy for a long time. “Yeah…so that’s what Aura does?”

Matheus nodded. “You get it now, good.” He paced away again, snatching a branch from the ground. He tested its weight, then twirled it in the air. “I can teach you those techniques on our way to Virona, so we’ll worry about that later. Your next lesson is on Aura Spheres.”

He held the stick under his arm, pacing left and right. “Now, an aura sphere is essentially a compact form of a simple punch, only it’s made entirely of aura, and it can hit a whole lot harder.” He pointed the stick at Lawrence, tapping his snout. “The longer you concentrate on it, the farther and harder it’ll hit. Keep that in mind.”

Lawrence pushed away the stick, rubbing his nose. “Alright, alright, I get it. So, what do I do?”

Matheus retracted the stick. “Put your paws together.” Lawrence did so. “Now, think of your aura link.”

“You mean Cassia?”

“Yes, I mean Cassia.”

Lawrence’s paws glowed.

Matheus nodded, circling the stick. “Good, now, sort of…concentrate it, in your paws. It’s difficult to describe, so just try.”

Lawrence closed his eyes, centering his thoughts on his paws. He tried to will the aura to flowing there. He felt the warmth in his chest flow into them, then felt the heat grow—so much that it felt like it would burn. He parted his paws, revealing a tiny sphere of pure light. Unlike the Life Spheres that Cassia used, it swirled and circled in a perfect ball, rather than sending jets of light out at random occurrences.

The sphere continued to grow, and Lawrence said, “How long should I do it?”

Matheus waved the stick, looking up. “It’ll keep going as long as you concentrate on it. When you’re ready to let it loose, just focus on where you want it to go, and aim at it.” He threw the stick into the air. “Aim for that!”

Lawrence quickly focused on the falling stick and jutted his paw at it. The aura sphere zoomed forward and thrust into the stick, curving as it fell. The stick splintered in two, its center singed and smoking.

Matheus inspected the stick, nudging it with his foot paw. “Hmm…not bad on your first try. Aura Spheres will follow inanimate objects, but for them to follow Pokémon, you need to focus on them more.” He held up a paw and caused an Aura Sphere to materialize instantly. “Let’s try again.”

~~~~

At night, Lawrence, Cassia, Matheus and Grom all sat in the jungle, sitting around a small fire on the bare ground. Illumise and Volbeat darted through the trees, stray lights shining through the darkness. Trumbeak warbled contentedly, resting on a full stomach of berries, nestled with their elder Toucannon warming their Pikipek with their beaks.

Matheus reclined on a root with a groan. “You’re getting better, Lawrence. A lot better.”

Lawrence groaned as well, rolling his shoulder. “I can tell…you’re getting in more cheap shots.”

“Hey, desperate times call for desperate measures,” Matheus remarked.

“You’re getting desperate to beat a Lucario who barely knows how to use aura?” Cassia asked.

Matheus waved a paw. “Nah, I’m only making it look like I’m getting desperate.” Cassia and Lawrence gave themselves knowing looks.

Matheus leaned up and said, “Well, better get to sleep. We have a long trek ahead of us to get to Virona.”

Cassia reached for him. “Wait, Matheus.” He looked over to her. “Can you tell us about Aleron?”

Matheus winced, then rubbed his eye. “What do you want to know?”

“Like what species he was, or what he was like.”

Matheus sighed, leaning forward. “Well…I don’t like talking about…him. Too many hard memories.”

“Tell us what you can then. I’d love to hear more about the creator of the Arceist Tome,” Cassia explained, leaning on Lawrence’s shoulder.

The silver Lucario closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Well…I guess I can tell you a little bit.” He opened his eyes. “He was…perfect, for sake of a better word. He always taught Pokémon what was right, helped the poor, and, of course, made the Tome. I—I often helped him.”

He sighed. “But…Arceus asked me a difficult question. After I answered, it turned out that I wasn’t really the servant that Arceus deserved. I had to serve him in other ways…”

He hung his head. “That was the day he died. I still don’t feel ready to remember him, let alone talk about him.” He lay down on his side, rolling away from Cassia and Lawrence. “It’s going to be a long day tomorrow. Just get to sleep.”

Lawrence and Cassia looked at each other in surprise, then followed Matheus’ example, sleeping apart.

~~~~

Over the week, Lawrence, Cassia, Matheus and Grom traveled through the Faylen Jungle, with Matheus training Lawrence, Cassia drawing pictures, and the lovers growing closer to each other. Now they were only one day away from Virona—and Lawrence’s departure.

The morning before they would reach Virona, Lawrence woke before any of his companions. His dreams were haunted by Tursha and his visions of the future, the warning that he must leave. Contrasting this were thoughts of Cassia, and how he wanted to remain with her, here in Equivos—regardless of the consequences.

He shuffled to a nearby stream, kneeling and splashing water onto his face. His reflection barely came through, showing a strong, young Lucario, still tired and worn from days of travel. Twenty-two days of it.

He rubbed the spike on the back of one paw. ‘If I go back to Unova…would I even change back? Would I still be a Lucario and be like all the other Pokemon in Facility D? Would I even see my parents again?’ He stopped, staring into the pool. ‘I’ve already been gone for over three weeks; Valence has surely said I’m missing…or dead.’

He considered these choices. ‘If I ignore Tursha’s warning, I’ll still be with Cassia, Grom and Matheus and be safe from Valence—until the world eventually gets destroyed. I don’t know what will happen, but everyone in Equivos would die—because of me.’

He grimaced, torn between these options. His ear twitched, and he looked back, finding Cassia behind him. Twigs and leaves stuck in her mane from a night of rolling.

She knelt next to Lawrence, beginning to pluck them out as she studied her reflection. “Sleeping out here isn’t the best for my look.” Lawrence didn’t reply.

She plucked out another twig, then set a claw on Lawrence’s paw. “What’s wrong?”

Lawrence turned away. “It’s nothing.”

Cassia’s ears drooped. “You’re thinking about leaving, aren’t you?”

Lawrence nodded. “I don’t think I can stay here…in Equivos.”

“Why?”

“I miss my mom and dad, for one. They must be worried sick about me. I usually call them twice a day, but ever since I left…” He pulled out his Pokédex and searched for a dimensional weakness, realizing he hadn’t done it for the past week. ‘No access point in range’.

Cassia stared at the Pokédex. “But…what about me? I can’t teach Pokémon without you; you have the last copy of the Tome.”

Lawrence looked back to Matheus, who snored on a tree root, his cloak’s splayed across the ground. “Matheus seems to have the entire book memorized. Just use him.”

Cassia took a glance at him and said, “Well, what if you don’t change back when you go?”

Lawrence winced. “As much as I like being a Lucario, I think I’ll turn back…hopefully.”

“If you don’t?”

“Then I’ll just have to deal with it.”

Cassia blew her breath out slowly, then said, “What if I come with you?”

Lawrence leapt up and exclaimed, “What?”

Cassia stood up. “I’ve always wondered how your world looks like. The forests, rivers, deserts…even the towns and Pokémon.” She curled a claw through her hair. “Plus…I wouldn’t mind seeing how you really look like.”

Suddenly, Lawrence thought of the implications of being in love with a Pokémon—in Unova. He shook his head vigorously and said, “No, no, you can’t! It’d be too—too—”

“Weird?” Cassia sighed.

Lawrence moaned. “Yes. Plus, when I left, I told Valence I’d bring back a Pokémon—”

“Then everything should be fine!”

“No, it wouldn’t.” Lawrence corrected. He took Cassia’s shoulders and said, “Look, I’d almost certainly end up back in Valence. If you come with me, they’ll take you away and find out how you’re able to talk.”

“I talk the same way you do.”

“But Pokémon don’t talk in my world. Valence sent me to take one of you, so they could…experiment on them.” He let go of Cassia and slumped. “They…they do horrible things to those Pokémon. I’ve seen it. I couldn’t live with myself if I brought anyone to them…let alone you.” He shivered, hugging himself. “They’d do the same to me if I stayed as a Lucario.”

Cassia stared at the ground for a moment, then said, “But…but you said you’d always be with me.”

Lawrence sighed, nodding his head. “I know…and I’d love it to stay that way.” He looked up to Cassia. “But I need to leave.” He lowered his head and closed his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

Cassia sniffed, a tear going down her cheek. She turned and ran back to the small clearing, leaving Lawrence to groan and press a paw against his head.

~~~~

In the dark of night, no moon illuminated the sky. Woven within the tallest trees were dozens of platforms and capsules, all suspended with vines or attached directly to the trunks. No Grass or Fairy Pokémon traipsed along the narrow walkways and bridges, and no candles or lanterns burned. Only the dull flutter of Dustox occupied the pitch-black night.

A lithe shadow whisked between the supporting vines of Virona, wrapping a coarse, black thread around them. The threads all hung overhead, wrapping together in the center to hang low to the ground, forming a large bundle.

The shadow stopped at the door of a house. It peaked inside, watching two small Audino rest in their beds, smiling. The shadow turned away, its ice-blue eyes narrowed. The Zoroark leapt off the bridge and landed on the ground, the Prison Bottle smacking against its thigh. He paced to the bundle of black wire and held up a claw; a crimson flame sparked on the end of it. He reached down to set the wire alight.

‘This is wrong.’

Arthus froze, inches away from the wire. “I’m saving these Pokemon. Cassia is coming; they’ll be converted to Arceism and trust in that Legend’s lies.” He held his hand closer.

He flinched and stopped, then stared at his arm. ‘This is proof that good Pokemon can exist without following Arceus! And you just want to burn it down?”

“Yes!” Arthus yelled, extinguishing the flame and pointing his claw at the city. “With every settlement lost, Arceus grows stronger! The world is tired of misery, so now it’s a war between me and Arceus—and I plan to win.”

‘You promised that I’d only kill those who stood in my way—and it has gone far beyond that with killing all the other Arceists.’ Arthus’ arm jolted down, and the Zoroark grimaced, baring his teeth. “We are going—to the temple—” he said with clenched teeth. He mechanically stepped away from the wire and toward the thick jungle. “And that’s—it!”

He stopped and turned to the wire. “I’m finishing—this first.” He held up a Life Sphere and aimed at the wire.

He pulled away and fired it into the air, scorching leaves as it soared into the night. He kept aiming at the wire and firing Life Spheres in the wrong direction, all the while pacing back and forth between the city and the jungle.

“You’re insane! Everyone knows it! Even you!” Arthus exclaimed.

“Genius is never appreciated in its time! Everyone will praise me in the future!”

“After being robbed of free will?”

“As long as everyone comes back to life, yes!”

Arthus shifted between his two personalities, his eyes shifting from the cold everyone known him for to the fire he had in the past. He screamed, clutching his head and falling to the ground. His vision went black.

~~~~

Pure black stretched over the sky, hanging over the endless trees below. A clearing opened in the center, where a gnarled stump grew from the ground, impossibly large. The air sparked, and an orb of crimson Life came into existence over the stump, creating a ruby haze across the entire landscape.

A Zoroark appeared on one side of the stump, pure black save for its cold blue eyes. They flitted back and forth, studying itself in horror. “He’s…he’s challenged me for control.”

Another Zoroark appeared on the other side, perfectly normal in its appearance save for his blue eyes. “It’s time I put an end to this madness.”

The black Zoroark laughed half-heartedly. “This won’t be any different from before. I will still exist, and I will take control once more, if only to make sure you don’t ruin it like before, Arthus.”

“You’re my shadow—all of my hatred and rage gathered into an opposite of me.” Arthus held out his claws, creating an onyx haze around him. “And shadows are supposed to follow in their master’s footsteps.”

His shadow laughed, following his same movements, only creating a foul red mist. “Weak-willed and afraid, yet here you are, standing up to me. I look forward to driving you back once and for all.” The Life-fueled sun began to lower, and they both charged toward each other.

They bashed into each other and locked claws, the red haze pushing against the black. Arthus’ feet scraped against the wood of the stump as his shadow pressed forward, his mouth in a wide grin. “You forget that I still have all your passions—but unlike you, I’m not afraid to get them back.” He released his grip and caused Arthus to stumble forward, then punched him across the jaw, blowing him back.

Arthus rolled across the ground, but dug his claws into the wood, stopping himself. He stood up and looked up at the sun; it continued to lower. His shadow stood underneath it.

He ran forward and clapped his hands together, generating onyx sparks of electricity. “I’m not afraid; I just know there are lines that shouldn’t be crossed!” He fanned out his arm and released a wave of pitch-black energy, clipping the shadow across his waist. He doubled over and clutched his chest, then Arthus slashed his legs twice and punched him back, making himself stand underneath the center of the sun.

The shadow seethed, covering the viscous black that flowed from his wounds. He stood up and shambled toward Arthus tapping his head with a smile. “But you can’t help it when bad memories haunt you.” A black wave radiated toward Arthus, emanating over him and crowding his mind.

He gasped, clutching his head and hunching down. “C-Corrina! Erik! Matheus!” His shadow’s Torment pulled up the dark memories of him betraying all he had loved—all for what he thought was the greater good.

His shadow grabbed Arthus’ mane and threw him aside, laughing. “You’re weak! Helpless! Without me, you would never have come this far!”

Arthus opened his eyes and aimed his hand at his shadow, cringing. “Without you…I’d be with Corrina…in the Tree of Life…instead of the Cocoon.”

His shadow knocked away his hand stamped on it with his good leg, crushing it and making Arthus scream. “But she’d still be dead, thanks to you! I had no part in that! I loved her as much as you do!”

Arthus forced himself to breath slower, pulling back his hand. “But you’re twisted…obsessed…you’re nothing like me…Cassia saw that…”

The shadow waved a dismissive hand and returned to the lowering sun, now only feet above his head. “I realize that; why do you think I let you take control and raise her? I’m not fit for such things.” He reached up, the sun only inches from his claws. “And if I have my way, I’ll make sure she doesn’t preach about Arceus ever again!”

“No!” Arthus cried, coming to his feet and running toward the shadow.

The shadow’s claws met with the sun, and the entire area was caught in crimson light.

~~~~

Arthus gasped, sitting upright and holding a hand to his chest. He woke below Virona as the moon began to sink beneath the horizon, beginning the dawn.

He looked up, listening for anything. He smiled and came to his feet, to the fuse he had made for Virona. He snapped his fingers and held the flame out to it. “Don’t worry, Arthus; I don’t plan on killing her. I share your love for her.” The flame caught on the wire and created hundreds of sparks, all becoming a tiny, yet powerful flame, darting through the wires and making all the vines and branches keeping Virona in the air catch fire as well.

Arthus curled his claws together, grinning. “Everything’s coming together…you’ll see.” The Grass and Fairy Pokemon of Virona ran through their burning home to the rope bridges that stretched to the ground—yet no ne were three, cut by Arthus. They all screamed, struggling to douse the fire that plagued them. Two child Audino hugged each other and cried, pleading desperately to be saved.

All the vines snapped, and one-by-one, the structure fell, instantly killing whoever remained with them. Virona became a raging inferno on the jungle floor, incinerating everything and belching smoke into the new day’s sky

Arthus’ eyes flickered, and his ears drooped. ‘This…this is never what I wanted. I wanted to save everyone from evil not…become that evil.’

His features returned to a face of malice as he turned away and faced the south, where metal clinked against metal and drew closer. “The ends justify the means.”

Six Houndoom burst from the plant life, barking and snarling as they pulled a large metal sled, mounted with chains. A Dusknoir held onto the handle at the back, his scarred eye wide with horror at the burning city of Virona.

The sled came to a stop and the Dusknoir hovered after Arthus, pointing wildly at the disaster. “What—what happened? I heard a crash on my way here and thought it was a tree, but this?”

Arthus pulled him back to the sled and made him grab on. “I’ll explain on the way there. Now go!” He wrapped around Gardner and grabbed onto the handle as well, then swung the chains that hung on the Houndoom’s chest. They barked and ran into the jungle to the west, where deep within, they sought the ancient Arceist Temple.

 

[Ambyssin]

Well now, this is very different. In a couple of ways. First off, the last handful of chapters have been formulaic. As in, they all literally went flashback --> Lawrence/Cassia stuff --> Gardner stuff. And it all centered around the Xilo Mountains (and Mt. Coronet in the flashback's case). Now, we've traded that area for a tropical demeanor. And the changes are very apparent right at the start. There's aa lot more vibrant wildlife here compared to the mountains, just going off all the descriptions of Pokémon doing stuff. The other big change is, of course, what's going on between Lawrence and Cassia. The ship has set sail! It's all extremely fluffy. Both literally (they've got a lot of fur between them) and figuratively (with their sickeningly sweet confessions toward each other and the unexpected dip that follows). It did make me smile in that absurdly cute, cheesy kind of way. I'm a sucker for that kind of stuff.

If I had to make any suggestions, I think Lawrence ought to have one line in his bit where he says he rightly and truly gave up hope of Arceus existing when his prayers went unanswered. I think it would make sense, given how adamantly he'd been behaving in past chapters. To suddenly say that he's been harboring a secret belief in Arceus really deep down all this time feels like something he made up on the spot. I'd personally find it more believable that he was holding out hope, but that hope died off before he met Cassia. Plus, it would further the impression of Cassia doing a lot of good for Lawrence.

The aura training part is a technobabble spiel, pure and simple. Or, rather, magibabble, I guess. Aura powers are just one of those really bizarre Pokémon logic things that will never be simple to explain so I basically dismiss it at magic. Aura Spheres are just magic Hadokens, after all. I also don't have an opinion on Aleron's backstory yet. The details are still too vague to have a complete picture, so I'll hold off on commenting on it until later.

Onto Gardner's part. To start off, there's apparently a time skip? And he's made it to the place where Lawrence and co. are heading? I, uh, think you may need to put in a couple of sentences detailing how he got there so quickly. You kind of casually brush over everything considering we haven't had any time skips like that recently. As for the actual content, it's interesting to see Gardner had an idol of sorts when he was litt.e But somehow, someway, he ended up going in the complete opposite direction. I'd feel a bit more for him but for awhile it seemed like he was going along with this stuff willingly. And he still has yet to raise a literal fist against Arthus. Especially while Arthus apparently destroys an entire town just to settle his own paranoia. So, I can't quite find him sympathetic. If anything, it's more like his sins have finally caught up with him.

And we end off with the conversation I pretty much saw coming. Lawrence says he's gotta leave (but not exactly why) and upsets Cassia. Well, that didn't last long. I expect the next chapter will have a resolution of sorts. And I'm sure there's a way toward a happy (but not perfect) ending for these two in some capacity. I'm still leaning toward them both ending up back in Equivos, but I could easily be wrong.

One last bit:

He felt the warmth in his chest flow into his paws, then felt the heat grow in his paws—so much that it felt like it would burn.

Pointing this sentence out because 'felt' is used three times and it gets really repetitive.

 

[lucarioknight56]

Well now, this is very different. In a couple of ways. First off, the last handful of chapters have been formulaic. As in, they all literally went flashback --> Lawrence/Cassia stuff --> Gardner stuff. And it all centered around the Xilo Mountains (and Mt. Coronet in the flashback's case). Now, we've traded that area for a tropical demeanor. And the changes are very apparent right at the start. There's aa lot more vibrant wildlife here compared to the mountains, just going off all the descriptions of Pokémon doing stuff. The other big change is, of course, what's going on between Lawrence and Cassia. The ship has set sail! It's all extremely fluffy. Both literally (they've got a lot of fur between them) and figuratively (with their sickeningly sweet confessions toward each other and the unexpected dip that follows). It did make me smile in that absurdly cute, cheesy kind of way. I'm a sucker for that kind of stuff.

I take it that the fluffy stuff isn't too much then? I want to make sure I don't go overboard!

If I had to make any suggestions, I think Lawrence ought to have one line in his bit where he says he rightly and truly gave up hope of Arceus existing when his prayers went unanswered. I think it would make sense, given how adamantly he'd been behaving in past chapters. To suddenly say that he's been harboring a secret belief in Arceus really deep down all this time feels like something he made up on the spot. I'd personally find it more believable that he was holding out hope, but that hope died off before he met Cassia. Plus, it would further the impression of Cassia doing a lot of good for Lawrence.

Yeah, I can agree with you there. I'll change that up.

Onto Gardner's part. To start off, there's apparently a time skip? And he's made it to the place where Lawrence and co. are heading? I, uh, think you may need to put in a couple of sentences detailing how he got there so quickly. You kind of casually brush over everything considering we haven't had any time skips like that recently.

Well, I'll just quote Chapter 15 to help remind you:

The Usurper raised his claws, smirking. “Well done, Gardner, well done. You’re that cowardly little Duskull all those years ago.” He yanked Gardner’s antenna and heft him up, bringing his eye level to his. “You’re coming with me to our final destination. I’ll say it again: slip this up, and you’ll wish you died long before you met me.” He released the Dusknoir and paced toward the disturbed snow pile. “Good thing they dumped this old fool out here; we’ll get over to the jungle in no time flat.”

...

The Usurper grabbed Gardner’s arm and stabbed his other hand into the ground. Crimson tendrils surrounded both of them, and they sunk inside, leaving behind the frigid city of Cryus.

While it wasn't inherently obvious, Arthus and Gardner were heading for the jungle all along, likely to take care of Virona.

As for the actual content, it's interesting to see Gardner had an idol of sorts when he was litt.e But somehow, someway, he ended up going in the complete opposite direction. I'd feel a bit more for him but for awhile it seemed like he was going along with this stuff willingly. And he still has yet to raise a literal fist against Arthus. Especially while Arthus apparently destroys an entire town just to settle his own paranoia. So, I can't quite find him sympathetic. If anything, it's more like his sins have finally caught up with him.

Well, right now it'd be foolhardy or Gardner to rise up against Arthus, considering the supposed plan he's a part of. I tried to show that he didn't want Virona to fall, but couldn't take action against Arthus without potentially losing his life. He's already risked a lot with his snapping back.

I will say, though, I don't necessarily like the view that you ended up receiving at the end. I'll add in a scene of refusal for Gardner, just to show that he really doesn't approve of Arthus' actions.

I'll wait for caniaries' review, then I'll post the changes. If you have any other thoughts, make sure to let me know!

 

[canisaries]

Chapter 16!

The Lucario sat upright, causing Grom to step back. He looked about and saw palm trees stretching high into the sky, their trunks and roots overcrowding the ground beneath them. Cawing over the distant rush, Toucannon swooped down from the canopy and pinched nuts off branches, their child Trumbeak warbling after them. Liepard lurked through the branches, keeping a watchful eye on the Emolga that drifted and chittered on the wind.

The Golurk pointed behind Lawrence, his eyes flashing. “Groawm.” The foot of the Xilo Mountains stretched in front of them, far higher than any of the trees. A mighty waterfall cascaded down the slope, fanning out to a wide sheet of rushing water. It expanded outward into a pool, which funneled into a coursing stream, wrapping between the roots and trees. Swanna swam in the pool, pecking at the Magikarp and Feebas that helplessly swam about. A Zoroark stood at the bank of the pool, holding her shoulder and looking down into the water.

I've said it a million times, but I can't get enough of these vivid and lively setting descriptions. :> Swam is repeated in that one sentence, though, would opt for a synonym if possible.

Lawrence held up his other paw, allowing it to glow with aura. “I think I got my answer to that prayer. You.” Cassia stared, then beamed.

S M O O T H
M
O
O
T
H

She whipped around and saw Matheus standing on the fringe of the jungle, standing with a large Trumbeak hanging over his shoulder.

"Standing" repeated.

“We’re all whiff a little too, so Grom volunteered to help.”

*We?

Mud pits and hollows steamed, belching out noxious gases. Sickened willow trees sprouted up amid the foul concoction, struggling to remain upright in the mess. Around the perimeter, Litwick and Lampent lurked, providing lights for the living Pokemon outside—only to lead them into the center, feeding their Life to the massive deposits scattered within. No life dared remain with the Ghosts.

Another exotic location with its own mechanics, love it. Also interesting backstory for Gardner, and it ties back into even his earliest appearances, which is good considering he was much less fleshed out back then - this makes it seem more planned than out-of-the-blue.

“Exactly!” Arthus cheered. “And like him, they will never do wrong, never feel pain, and never make mistakes!”

Gardner closed his fingers. “Just like you?”

Arthus flinched. “What?”

Gardner held himself higher. “Just like you. You’ve never done wrong, never felt pain, and never made a mistake.” Arthus’ smile vanished. “Isn’t that right…Lord?”

oh crap, he goin in hard

“You’re getting better Lawrence. A lot better.”

Missing comma.

He had already been gone for over three weeks; they can only keep up a lie for so long and will surely admit that he was missing--or deceased.

Double hyphen instead of the dash you usually use.

 

[lucarioknight56]

A delayed thanks for your review, canisaries!

Alright, important announcement coming. My beta reader's been inactive on her email and general reading lately, and at this point in my writing I could really use some help. 'd rather not be posting an unfinished chapter and have it be reviewed later, so...

I'm looking for a new beta reader. If you would like review chapters one or two weeks before they are officially posted, let me know via conversation (PM). I'd greatly appreciate anyone coming on board to help. All I can offer in return is a better quality story for everyone to enjoy.

With that said, I look forward to posting Chapter 17 over the weekend! I don't want to say much about it, so keep watch!

 

[lucarioknight56]

Chapter 20: Desolation

“You destroyed an entire town because there was a chance they’d become Arceists?” Gardner roared. “That is idiotic and insane!”

Arthus and Gardner zoomed through the narrow passageways created by the dense jungle, all through the night and into the morning. The trees gradually grew less dense, and the cawing of birds grew quieter as they drove deeper.

Arthus held on to the sled around Gardner’s girth, struggling to look around him. “Would you let it go? They weren’t even acting like the rest of the outposts anyway!”

“That doesn’t change anything! I thought you were crazy enough slaying a servant for bringing the wrong drink, but this is a whole other level!” Gardner groaned, rubbing his eye. “Augh, never mind. Can’t change anything anyway.”

The sled lurched and Arthus pulled it to a stop, and the Houndoom quieted, waiting for orders. Towering in front of them was a massive stone structure, engraved with thousands of drawings and coated entirely with vines. Balanced on top of it was a broken Arc of Arceus, split in half. No birds sung, and no movement could be heard; not even the wind whistled. The building exuded a somber aura, almost ordering a place of peace.

Gardner broke away from the sled, looking around warily. “So…this is the temple.”

Arthus nodded slowly, following him. “Indeed.” He stepped toward it and began cutting through the vines.

As he did so, Gardner came closer and cleared his throat. “Why do you need me here? Aren’t you supposed to be dealing with Hoopa?”

Arthus cut the last layer of vines, revealing the yawning entrance into the temple. He stepped inside, holding up the Prison Bottle by its rope. “You play an important role, Gardner. Just come inside.” The Dusknoir hesitantly followed.

Inside, massive pillars rose up to meet the ceiling, all carved with depictions of the Legends. Sconces of all sizes lined the walls and pillars, dark. There were no other doorways or windows to speak of; the entrance they went through was the sole opening. A massive stone slab hung over the door, supported by two giant timbers. A massive mural stretched across the floor, depicting all the Legends, Arceus standing chief among them. Along the walls were various levels of benches with stone ladders leading up to them, creating an auditorium. At the far end, a single podium stood, shaped in such a way to hold scrolls or books for the lead priest to preach.

Arthus stood at the podium and set the Prison Bottle on top of it. Gardner stood next to him, holding his arms behind his back. Arthus took a deep breath, then took hold of the bottle’s cap. The eyes on it lit up.

Arthus leaned over to Gardner and said, “I promise not to kill you.”

Gardner furrowed his brow. “What do you—”

Arthus pulled off the cap and violet gas erupted from the neck, filling the entire room. Beyond, a Pokemon screamed, shooting through the entryway. It appeared in the center of the violet clouds and turned out to be the smaller Hoopa, the rings on his chest and arms suspending him in the air.

As the gas enclosed him, he noticed Arthus and screamed, “What have you done?” The rest of his pleas were muffled by the gas as it grew to consume the entire room, coming the scrape the ceiling. The mist stopped flowing from the bottle and solidified, darkening. Its feet hovered slightly above the floor, crossed. Its six arms lay tucked in its body, a single giant hole within its chest. Purple hair exploded from its head, flowing from the shining silver armor of its chest and legs. It’s eyes glowed emerald, and its wicked grin revealed rows of pointed teeth.

The Zoroark held the bottle high as the clouds finally formed into a solid shape. Its feet hovered slightly above the floor, crossed. Its six arms lay tucked in its body, a single giant hole within its chest. Purple hair exploded from its head, flowing from the shining silver armor of its chest and legs. Its head nearly touched the ceiling, standing over ten times higher than Gardner, who shrunk behind Arthus.

The eyes opened, and rows of pointed teeth revealed themselves. “You have unleashed the mighty Hoopa, granter of wishes.” He bowed his head, two arms popping out and pounding together. “I will grant a single wish for the wielder of my prison.”

Arthus kept his grip on the bottle, his hands shaking. “Before I ask my wish, I would like to ask you some questions. I trust that will not be an issue?”

Hoopa frowned, his eyes narrowing. “I am obligated to answer any question while you are my master. What do you wish to know?”

Arthus scarcely hid a sigh of relief. “Will you be released from the Prison Bottle upon granting my wish?”

Hoopa leaned back, popping out four of his arms; two positioned themselves behind his head, and the other two rested on his chest. “For three days, I am free to do as I please. Once the third sun has set, I must return to the bottle, and my true power is concealed until someone awakens me once more.”

“Can you destroy the bottle?”

“No. Only if a master commands me to do so. But that would require a wish, and none are so selfless—or foolish—to do so.”

Arthus rubbed his chin, closing his eyes. “I may be willing to release you.”

Hoopa swung forward and rested his six arms on the ground, smiling wide. “Really? You would release me?”

Arthus took an involuntary step back, and Gardner hovered in his shadow. “W-Why yes. But in exchange, I will need you to fix this.” He held up the Seal of Creation with his free hand, revealing the cracked sapphire in its center.

Hoopa’s eyes flashed, and his mouth hung open. “The Seal of Creation. Arceus’ means of eliminating my kind.” He leaned back again, tapping his fingers together. “You have done well in choosing this place; Arceus’ followers built this temple long ago as a means of contacting him and begging him for blessings. I can tap into his power to complete this feat.” He leaned forward once more and pointed all his index fingers at Arthus. “I am no fool. You plan on taking me into the Seal, just so you can use my power!”

Arthus dropped the Seal and held up the bottle. “I don’t! I promise I won’t!” Hoopa lowered his arms, leering at the Seal.

Arthus wheezed, then brushed back his mane. “How about we make a deal?” Behind his back, his fingers twisted around, forming a gem between them. He tossed it to Gardner and quickly wrote a message in pale red light: “Place your Life inside.”

Gardner cocked his head and went to say something, but a warning look from Arthus made him hold his voice.

Hoopa continued to stare, folding his arms. “I’m listening.”

Arthus turned back around with a forced smile. Here’s my proposal: You repair the Seal and promise not to harm me, then I will release you and promise not to harm you.”

Hoopa held up his fingers. “The process of repairing the Seal will significantly tax me. I will require more on your part for such a bargain to be worth my while.”

Arthus waved a dismissive hand. “Understandably. After making my wish and before you repair the Seal, you can drain my servant of Life.” He waved to Gardner and slyly took the gem from his frozen hands, now glowing red.

Gardner eyes whisked back and forth between Arthus and Hoopa. “What? I never—”

Hoopa laughed, its echo reverberating through the room. “How entertaining! Very well, I accept.” He growled and pound his fists on the ground. “But what happens if you do take me with the Seal?”

Arthus held up a claw, his smile gone. “I expected this. If I harm you, then—then Arceus can kill me where I stand.” The floor rumbled, and Arthus paled. He hurriedly added, “B-But if you harm me or break the order of our deal, then you return to the bottle instantly!”

Hoopa hummed to himself, resting his head on his hand. He nodded curtly and held out a hand. “A reasonable bargain.”

Gardner hovered forward and sputtered, “What—What do you mean I’m going to be—”

Arthus’ hand met with Hoopa’s, and they both shook. A wave of violet energy radiated from them, and Hoopa snatched the Seal of Creation from Arthus’ neck. He pointed at him and said, “Make the wish.”

In a clear voice, Arthus said, “I, Arthus Zoroark, wish for the Seal of Creation to be made whole.” He rubbed the glowing gem behind his back.

Two of Hoopa’s arm snatched Gardner and held him in the air. Despite his screams, Hoopa held him over his mouth and opened wide. Crimson mist flowed from Gardner’s body into Hoopa’s mouth, until he closed his eye and fell limp and silent.

Hoopa smacked his lips and gently set Gardner’s body on the ground. “Delicious.” All six of his arms surrounded the Seal, with two delicately holding it up in the air. “Now for my end of the bargain.” Hoopa grunted, and with two hands he sent a beam of light into the gem. The single shot fused into the Seal, a tiny pinprick of many. He then continued with another, methodically restoring the single weakness to the almighty Arceus. With a third hand, he wove a mystical thread through the cracks, and with the fourth shone a violet light across it.

Hoopa grit his teeth, hovering around the Seal occasionally and leaning close to ensure his hands made no mistake. Arthus watched him work, entranced by the many lights used to fix it. Little by little, the jagged crack through the sapphire sealed, until only a faint outline remained.

Hoopa held his four arms away and bellowed, “It is done!” He clamped his hands around the Seal and exploded with bright light. It faded, and Hoopa delicately held it out to Arthus, as perfect as the day it was made.

Arthus graciously took it with his free hand, a smile widening across his face. “Finally…”

Hoopa reared back his hands, grinning as well. “Allow me to destroy the bottle and secure my freedom.” He snatched the bottle from the podium and bludgeoned it with his other five fists, cackling wildly. The ornate container remained undamaged, its green eyes glowing fiercely.

Hoopa faltered, holding it away. “What is this? Why does it not break under my might?”

Arthus slowly revealed the gem from before, still glowing with crimson light. “The deal was that you’d kill Gardner before you repaired the Seal. In case you haven’t noticed,” he threw the gem at Gardner and caused it to shatter on his chest. The red light enveloped him, then Gardner shot upright and gasped, holding his head.

Arthus waved to the Dusknoir. “He’s still alive.”

Hoopa growled, clenching his fists. He suddenly roared and bellowed, “You deceived me! I will make you suffer a thousand deaths!” His arms shot toward Arthus, only to dissipate into mist. The cap of the bottle opened, and Hoopa little by little flowed into it.

Arthus shrugged and lowered the Seal around his neck. “You broke the rules, you go back in the bottle. Simple.” Hoopa roared again as a small figure hovered up from the mist.

Hoopa’s last free hand wrapped around the figure and called, “I will not allow you to go free!” The figure screamed as he too faded into mist and funneled into the bottle, until at last all of it was caught within, and the cap closed.

Arthus let out all his pent-up breath and fell against the podium, forcing a laugh. “I…I did it…the Seal is fixed…and Hoopa is still trapped.”

Gardner advanced toward Arthus, his eye burning with hatred. “You used me! You would’ve had me killed to fix that accursed Seal!”

Arthus forced his arms down and said, “I told you before, I wasn’t going to kill you! I had it all under control.”

Gardner humphed and said, “You were shaking like a leaf.” He eyed the Seal and said, “So, what now? Are you headed for Deitae now?”

Arthus shook his head. “No, not yet. I have some unfinished business to take care of.” He patted Gardner on the back and said, “But feel free to go now. You’ve done your part.”

Gardner spun around and grabbed Arthus’ shoulders. “That’s it? You wanted me to be some tool to fool Hoopa?”

Arthus ducked under Gardner’s grip and yanked his antenna to force him down. He held a claw dangerously close to Gardner’s maw. “Don’t take it personally. I mean it.” He let go of Gardner and said, “Just go. Take a vacation if you need. I’m sure Martre will manage.”

Gardner rubbed his antenna and remained silent as he floated out of the temple, leaving Arthus to disappear in a shimmer. The Dusknoir mounted the sled and whipped the chain, then swerved south, careening through the trees.

He furrowed his brow and said under his breath, “I swear, Zoroark, you’re going to regret using me like that.”

~~~~

Lawrence, Cassia, Grom and Matheus continued their trek to Virona in solemn silence. Cassia stood close to Grom, hiding behind him, while Lawrence stood ahead, following Matheus as he blazed a trail. No Trumbeak sung and no Emolga chittered; the very movement within the Faylen jungle seemed to have stopped.

Matheus pushed through a thick cluster of vines ahead of him. “Virona should be just past here,” he explained. He pushed past it and froze. Grom, Cassia, and Lawrence joined him in astonishment.

Smoldering husks of wood lay tumbled across the forest floor. Smoke rose high in the air across hundreds of feet of ash and charcoal. No Pokémon were visible amongst the remains, all burned away by the massive flames of the previous night.

“What…what happened?” Cassia whispered, putting a hand over her mouth.

Matheus treaded carefully through the remains, searching. “Virona must have caught fire as recently as last night. We couldn’t see anything because of the thickness of the jungle.” He held up a singed fabric doll, the eyes of the Oddish staring blankly back. “Knowing the height it used to hang from…no one survived.” He dropped the doll, then took off his hat and lowered his head. Everyone else followed suit.

After around a minute of standing, Matheus put his hat back on and said, “Well…there’s nothing else to do here.” He looked back to Lawrence. “Just…just one last thing. The temple.” Lawrence slowly nodded back, while Cassia hugged Grom.

Matheus lead the procession past the graveyard and to an unkempt trail, brushing past low ferns and patches of grass. A thin haze of smoke hung overhead, causing their eyes to water.

The massive stone temple loomed closer, and all Lawrence could think of is how he wished to stay. ‘I…I want to be part of Equivos…to be with Cassia. I missed so much while hating Arceus…I want everyone else to realize their mistake. Some aspect I still have issues with, yes, but still…I was wrong.’

He grimaced and thought back to Castelia and its environment. ‘How can I go back after this? Equivos is so much better than Castelia. I don’t have to worry about Hanson or his technology changing the world.’ He shivered. ‘Especially with what he planned to do with one of the Equivosians. I can’t leave.’

He sighed and rubbed the side of his head. ‘But if I stay, I’m dooming everyone, even myself. Tursha’s seen the future, and what he says makes sense; I caused dimensional disturbances, and the only way to fix them is to leave. This world wouldn’t stay perfect for long.” He bit his lip and bowed his head. “I can’t let that happen.’

Finally, they stood at the entrance of the giant stone temple. They entered the darkness within and saw a single tattered Xatu standing at the podium, his back facing them.

Matheus paused in front of the door, then turned around. He motioned for Lawrence to continue, then followed him inside. Upon entering, they saw that the temple had no other doorways or windows to speak of; the entrance they went through was the sole opening.

When Grom entered the temple, Tursha turned around mechanically. The bandage still wrapped around his head, completely covering his eyes. “You brought companions. Friends.” He nodded his head. “That was expected.” He waved his wing. “Come closer, Lawrence Stephenson.”

Lawrence did so, his steps becoming shorter and shorter. He stopped, his paws quivering. He turned back to Matheus, Grom and Cassia, then turned back to Tursha. “Do I…do I really have to leave? Isn’t there some other way?”

The Xatu remained still. “To save this world, there is none. It will not be tomorrow, not even the day after, or even next year or the year after, that we shall succumb to the unraveling of this world. But this is your one opportunity to leave, and unless you do, certain death lies ahead.” He motioned for him again. “Come within wing’s reach, and it shall be done.”

Lawrence swallowed fearfully and took another step. Cassia exhaled sharply and ran to Lawrence, embracing him. “You can’t leave! You just can’t!”

The Lucario forced himself to push her away, bowing his head. “I’m sorry…but I don’t want you to die…because of me…” He rubbed her tears away from her face, forcing himself to smile. “Just remember…I’ll always be with you. Even if I’m in a different world.” They embraced each other once more, while Grom and Matheus bowed their heads sadly.

“How touching.”

The stone slab fell in front of the entrance with a crash, plunging the room into darkness. All raised their heads, bewildered by this turn of events.

The sconces erupted in crimson light, brightly illuminating the temple. Tursha cocked his head, putting his wings together. “I gather you together…I remain in the shadows…I nudge here and there…all of this hard work…”

Tursha straightened, his blindfold starting to slide down his head. “Now, what do I witness? A Lucario in love with a Zoroark? How…loathsome.”

Matheus stared at Tursha, squinting his eyes. “You sound familiar.”

Cassia nodded, eyes wide. “He does.”

Tursha reached up for his blindfold. “Oh, so you know me?” He ripped away the blindfold. “I know you very well.” Two bright blue eyes glared harshly at them, quivering.

Everyone took a step back. “Arthus,” Matheus hissed.

The Xatu disappeared, revealing a graying Zoroark wearing a perfect, golden pendant. He grinned and held his head high, his mane trailing the floor. “And I have exactly what I need.”

Lawrence’s head turned back and forth, then he finally exclaimed, “How? Why? You tricked me?”

Arthus cackled, leaning back. “Oh, it was all too easy. I mean, seriously, ‘the energies that surround your arrival are destroying the world’? Arceus would never let that slide!” He narrowed his eyes. “Isn’t that right, Matheus?”

Matheus growled, his paws beginning to glow. “So all this time, you just lied to Lawrence about him being able to return home? For no good reason?” He jabbed a paw at the Seal. “And how did you fix that? It was broken beyond repair!”

Arthus wagged a claw. “Not true. I had a little…divine help.” He held up the Prison Bottle, the eyes glowing green.

“He’s…he’s loose?” Matheus shouted, paling.

Arthus laughed and let go of the bottle, allowing it to smack against his thigh. “No, no, no, even I’m not crazy enough to let Hoopa Unbound free. No, I managed to trick him and got him inside.” He shook his head and stepped off the podium. “But I digress. Let’s get down to why I tricked all of you into coming here.” He pointed at Matheus, grinning. “He’s priority number one. After I learned you were alive, I wanted nothing more than to send you into the Seal—even more than Arceus.” He gestured around the temple. “And this is the perfect place. No way to run or hide—just you and me.”

Matheus growled and held up his paws. “I’m not going down without a fight. You still have to touch me with it to take me.”

Arthus smirked. “Just wait.” He looked over at Lawrence. “And you. I was rather surprised to find out you were really from a different world, but, like the other Lucario, you must die.” He clenched his fist, his eyes glowing red. “Plus, there’s this little romance with my daughter.”

Red mist rose around Cassia as she crouched, holding out her claws. “I’m not your daughter!” She and the others failed to notice her bag rustling.

Arthus scowled and crossed his arms. “I raised you. I cared for you. I taught you everything you know.”

Cassia faltered, standing straighter. “Y-Yes, but—”

Arthus pulled at his mane and screamed, “I gave you everything! And what did you do? Abandon me, the only one who ever loved you!”

Cassia shrunk away and covered her face while Lawrence stepped forward and said, “Leave her alone! You’re the one who’s made everyone hate her! You’re a mass murderer! Why shouldn’t she run away?”

Arthus suddenly calmed, tapping his claws together. “Why, Grom happens to agree with me.”

Lawrence blinked and narrowed his eyes. “What do you mean—”

“GRAAWW!”

Grom threw his arms out and stepped backward, grasping the air in front of him. Arthus melted into the air and reappeared on Grom’s chest, climbing it quickly and holding a black, spherical stone in his claws.

Cassia gasped and turned to Lawrence. “The Illusion Stone! Where is it?”

Lawrence groped around his neck, only to find an empty string, cleanly cut. His head snapped to Arthus as he recognized the sphere as the illusionary artifact, clambering up to Grom’s head. He held it high and slammed it into the crack in Grom’s head, fitting perfectly. Grom froze, then lowered his limbs, falling still. His light went out.

“Grom!” Cassia ran in front the Golurk, shaking his arms and trying to make him move. Arthus slid off his back and disappeared once more.

Lawrence and Matheus came next to Cassia, each with the fur on the back of their heads rising. “Do you sense him anywhere?” Lawrence asked.

Matheus closed his eyes and slowly turned his head behind him. “Yes…right there!” He swung his paw behind him and clashed with Arthus’ arm, narrowly blocking the Seal from hitting his chest.

Arthus pressed closer, causing Matheus to stoop. “Don’t delay the inevitable; we both know how this will end, brother.”

“Get away from him!” Lawrence shouted, running forward with fists covered in aura.

Arthus pushed Matheus aside and dropped the Seal, meeting Lawrence’s Aura with his Life. They traded blows, and Arthus cackled, growing faster and faster. “You’ve gotten stronger, but you’re still nothing compared to—urk!”

Matheus punched Arthus’ side from behind him and forced him to the ground. The Legend took a quick breath. “Lawrence—we can’t stay here. We have to go!”

Arthus groaned and brought himself upright. “Talking about your plans out in the open again…always worked out for you.”

Lawrence slugged him across the chin and caused him to stagger backward, revealing the Seal of Creation. “We have to take it back!”

Arthus cackled and rubbed his chin, his eyes glowing red. “Now that’s more like it!” He met with both Matheus and Lawrence, swapping between them and trading blows, straining to touch the Legend with the Seal.

Cassia stared back at the Lucario, grimacing. “I…I can’t leave Grom.” She turned back to him. “Please…please be alright.”

Grom’s eyes flickered, then flashed. He whirred and rolled his shoulder, focusing on Cassia. She stepped back and said, “Are you…alright?”

Grom stared for a moment longer, then suddenly grabbed Cassia around her shoulders, pinning her arms to her sides. “Directive continued; restrict target until command received.”

Cassia screamed, pushing against her companion’s grip. “No! Grom, please, come back!”

Lawrence beat back Arthus’ claws and saw Cassia’s plight. “He’s…he’s like he was before!”

“Why of course!” Arthus kicked Matheus away and grabbed Lawrence’s neck, dragging him closer. “That missing piece was all I needed to bring back my servant—and you brought it right to me.”

“Raaagh!” Lawrence kneed Arthus in the gut then clouted him with his paw, stunning him. He then ran to Grom and shouted, “Let her go!”

Grom’s eyes flashed as he repositioned Cassia to be held in one arm, then took a step closer. “Threat detected. Disposing of target now.” He threw a rocket-powered kick at Lawrence and sent him flying into a pillar, cracking the stone.

Matheus stood over Arthus and reached for the necklace around his neck. “You have no idea what will happen if you use this!”

Arthus groaned and slapped Matheus’ paw away, hastily coming upright. “Wrong! I’ll make this world like Arceus should have years ago!” He held up the Seal and leapt for Matheus. Matheus rolled backward and ran for the blocked entrance. Arthus followed.

Lawrence slid down the cracked pillar and moaned, rubbing his back. Grom threw a punch at him despite Cassia’s cries. He ducked underneath the Golurk and grabbed onto the arm holding Cassia, struggling to pull her free.

As Matheus and Arthus knocked the Seal back and forth, Cassia pushed against Grom’s might with Lawrence, doing nothing against the Golurk. “I have to change him back!”

“He’ll just lose his memory again! There has to be another way!” Lawrence replied, releasing his grip just as Grom punched in his direction.

Grom swung for him again and spun on his feet, stumbling. He let go of Cassia to steady himself, sending her rolling on the ground. She shook free of her dizziness and watched Grom continue to assault Lawrence and Arthus chase Matheus, each threatening to kill the other.

She looked at Arthus and his firing Life Spheres, then at Grom and the filled socket in his head. She blinked and remembered: ‘Arthus used his Life to change Grom.’ She sprinted toward Grom and jumped onto his back. ‘I can too!’

Lawrence saw Cassia on the Golurk’s back and said, “What are you doing up—”

Grom punched him across the jaw and sent him into the wall next to the entrance. He weakly attempted to get up but lowered his head and fell still.

Arthus and Matheus pushed against each other, paw against claw. Arthus brought his face close to Matheus’. “Do you still feel guilty? Ashamed?”

Matheus eyed the Seal of Creation, dangling from Arthus’ wrist and nearly touching his own. “…Yes.” He abruptly let go and clouted Arthus over the head. Arthus’ arm lifted as he fell to the ground, and Matheus grabbed the Seal by the chain on his wrist. He stared at it briefly, then turned to the slab covering the entrance.

He considered both as Arthus came to his feet and reached for the Seal. Matheus threw it to the other side of the room and ran for the slab. Arthus ran for the Seal and screamed, “You were always an idiot!”

Matheus grabbed the rope hanging by the pulley above the slab and began to pull, grunting. “Cassia, have you brought back Grom?”

Cassia held on to Grom’s neck with all her might as the Golurk floundered to grab her, stamping around in a circle robotically. “Almost…there,” she said, setting a hand on his head. She closed her eyes and the top of Grom’s head flashed crimson. He stood completely still as the light faded.

Arthus scrabbled for the Seal in the corner of the room, the light covered by being facedown. He looked back briefly and shouted, “I’ll deal with you after Matheus is mine!”

Cassia slid down Grom’s back, holding her hands together. “Can…can you hear me? Grom?”

The Golurk flinched, then slowly turned his head toward her. “…C…Cassia?”

The Zoroark sighed in relief and stepped forward to hug him. “You can—”

The Golurk stepped forward and swung his arms back dangerously while his head swiveled back and forth. Cassia rolled out of the way and panted, shocked.

Grom locked up again and shuddered. “I…I can’t control myself. I have to follow Arthus’ directive…to capture you.”

Cassia held up her claws and reached out for him. “I’ll just—”

“No!” Grom stomped again, forcing his fists to the ground. “Arthus has done too much; you were lucky to free my emotions.” He sighed. “And I can’t break free. I’m…I’m sorry Cassia.”

Cassia’s throat bobbed, then she speedily climbed onto his back. “I’ll just knock out that piece again!”

Grom’s eyes flashed weakly. “No…you won’t get it a second time. You’ll destroy my mind, and I’ll be no good for anything.”

Behind them, Matheus wheezed, taking choking breaths. “This…this door is heavy.” He looked over at Cassia and Grom. “I wish I could help.”

“Oh, Matheus…”

The Lucario slowly turned his head, where Arthus stood to his left, dangling the Seal in front of him. He groaned, dropping the rope. “Why don’t you just hit me with it already?”

Arthus laughed and reared the Seal back. “I want to remember this moment!” He swung the Seal forward—only to be blown back by a lone Aura Sphere.

Matheus turned to its direction and saw Lawrence with his paw thrust out, his fur matted and blood dribbling down his lip. “Don’t. Touch. Matheus.”

Arthus got up from the ground and chuckled, rubbing his side. “Oh, now you fight.” He set the Seal around his neck and ran toward him, claws extended. “I might as well take care of you first!”

Matheus yanked back on his mane and shouted, “Not if I have anything to say about it!” He continued to wrestle with the Zoroark as Lawrence leapt into the fray, weakly punching the Zoroark.

Cassia turned between Grom and the brawlers, cringing. “Grom…there has to be something you can do. Anything. They need help.”

Grom looked down at his chest, then his eyes flashed. “There is one thing.” He shakily reached up for the brace on his chest.

Cassia’s eyes widened as she tried to push down his hand. “No. Not that. Anything but that!” As she spoke, Arthus swept under Matheus feet and sent him to the ground while he traded blows with Lawrence, continually advancing on him.

Despite her pleas, Grom dug his fingers underneath his brace, revealing the bright light beneath it. “You can’t bring me back.” He looked down and tugged at the brace. “And I can’t serve Arthus!”

Cassia pulled at Grom’s arm harder, crying out, “Don’t! You’ll die!”

Matheus got off his back and ran to intercept Arthus and Lawrence, but a dozen Arthuses suddenly appeared around him. They all grinned and held out their hand. “It was all thanks to you this happened, right?” Matheus froze, shrinking to the ground as the fake Arthuses advanced.

Arthus slashed the air in front of Lawrence, driving him into the corner of the temple. “Matheus is a fraud, Grom is a minion, and Cassia is mine! Where are you in this story?”

Lawrence wheezed, his vision becoming blurry as the pain in his body grew. “I…I don’t care.”

Arthus spun around him and drove his claws into Lawrence’s side, making him gasp. He fell to the ground and clutched at the wound, doing nothing to stop Arthus from standing over him. The Zoroark smiled as he held his claw up to strike.

Cassia and Grom watched as Lawrence was about to be killed by the Usurper. Grom tugged at the brace once more, pulling loose a bolt. He jerked, and in a struggling voice said, “It—it was a pleasure to serve you—Cassia. You gave me my greatest memories—and taught me—to be a friend.”

Cassia pulled herself away from Lawrence and croaked, “You don’t have to do this.”

Grom’s eyes dimmed as he pulled the brace a final time. “Lawrence will protect you now.” The brace came free, and Grom threw out his arms and bellowed, “Remember me!” As the brace and bolts clattered against the floor, his arms spun around rapidly, advancing toward Arthus. “Roa-raw-raor-raaaaaaahh!”

Arthus’ illusions faded, and Matheus gasped and rolled out of the way, while Arthus stopped midswing and paled. The onyx Golurk roared and charged toward him at full speed, his arms spinning faster than the eye could see.

Arthus sprinted away from him, nearly running on all-fours. “What have you done?” He circled around a pillar and Grom bashed into it, instantly destroying it. Arthus circled another with the same results.

Cassia broke free of her shock and gathered Grom’s brace and bolts. She cautiously approached him, holding out his safety components.

Matheus stood up and stared at Grom chasing Arthus, destroying yet another pillar. He looked up and grit his teeth; the ceiling shook, and the remaining six pillars were struggling to keep it up.

Matheus started toward the slab. “This place will collapse at any moment!”

Lawrence groaned, reaching out for him. “Matheus…”

The Legend swerved around and sat next to him, putting a paw over his mouth upon seeing his wound. “You need help. Now.”

Lawrence grabbed onto Matheus’ cloak and pulled himself higher. “Where’s…Cassia?”

“Grom!”

They both snapped their heads toward the shriek, where Cassia stood in front of a pillar with her arms out, holding the Golurk’s brace. Arthus ran toward her, having no other option thanks to the Golurk’s pursuit.

Arthus tossed his hand to the side and yelled, “Get out of the way! He’s gone berserk!” He tripped and skidded against the floor, only to get stomped on his leg by Grom. He screamed in agony and struggled to push himself up despite the flattened limb.

Cassia remained still as Grom advanced, not caring who his target was. Realization came too late to her as Grom’s spinning fists slammed into her and threw her into the wall next to the crushed Arthus. She lay still, her bag caught in Grom’s hand and his bolts still in hers.

Lawrence abruptly stood up and cried, “Cassia!” He limped toward her, clutching his wound.

The bag caught in Grom’s hand slung toward Lawrence’s head. Matheus caught it in the air inches from contact, then grabbed Lawrence’s arm and shuffled toward the exit. “I’ll come back for her once you’re out!”

The walls of the temple began to crumble, revealing a small hole next to the stone slab. Matheus and Lawrence toward it as a fifth pillar fell to Grom’s rampage.

Arthus crawled to Cassia and flipped her onto her back, eyes wide with fright. “Talk to me! Say something!” Her eyes fluttered as she struggled to lift her head, but she fell back, unconscious.

The Usurper cursed and forced himself to his feet, screaming as he put weight onto his broken leg. He took Cassia’s arms and dragged her toward Matheus, far slower than the other. He reached for him and cried, “Help her! Don’t leave her to die!” He gasped as Grom advanced toward him once more, destroying a sixth pillar. The temple’s ceiling crumbled, showering stones around them.

Matheus reached the crumbling hole and pushed Lawrence out, then threw Cassia’s bag. He darted back inside as he said, “I’m going back for Cassia!”

Arthus fell to the ground and held up his hands pleadingly toward the incoherent Grom. “Stop! Stop! Stop!” He lowered his head and cringed as Grom threatened to beat him down.

Matheus ran toward him and threw and Aura Sphere at Grom. It swerved around and knocked into his side, making him stumble to the left and bash into not one, but two pillars as he fell next to the last in the center. He spasmed as his internal light grew whiter and whiter.

Matheus fell next to Arthus and Cassia, leering at Arthus’ Seal. “How can I trust you with that?”

Arthus pushed Cassia to him and hung his head low. “Just take her. Her life is more important than mine.”

Matheus stared for a moment, then stood up and hefted Cassia, setting her over his shoulders. He ran as hard as he could to the exit, while Arthus limped after him, wincing and moaning with every step.

Grom stood upright and held his arms out, his chest becoming blindingly bright. “GRAAAAAAAAAWWW!” He exploded, blowing back everyone still left in the temple and destroying the final pillar. As black fragments of his body fell, the roof sagged, and stones continued to fall.

Cassia and Arthus landed near the far wall away from the exit, their fur singed. Matheus rolled across the ground and stopped near the sole exit from the temple. He stood up and looked around him, his face falling with every moment. He took a final look at Arthus and Cassia, then turned away and closed his eyes. He ran out of the temple just as the exit covered over.

Arthus looked around him, defeated. “Arceus…you’ve won.” He turned to Cassia and closed his eyes as stones the size of boulders fell around him. “But it was an empty victory…”

Lawrence stood just beyond the temple, holding Cassia’s bag. Matheus ran toward him and dragged him away from the imploding temple. As they retreated, Lawrence cried, “Where’s Cassia? Where is she?”

The top of the temple fell, and a deafening crack rung out. Matheus and Lawrence were blown away by the sheer force of impact, rolling into the dense trees nearby. The Arceist temple roared and groaned as its entirety rumbled on top of those who remained, their booming cacophony ringing out for miles.

The dust billowed high into the sky, and the Temple now stood twenty feet high, little more than several tons of rubble and scrap.

Minutes after, Lawrence shook his head free of the leaves, then froze. “No…” He forced himself to stand, then hobbled to the remains of the Temple, finding no sign of life.

“No, no, no!” He pulled free rocks as large as he could lift, but to no avail. Arthus lay buried, ending his conquest to usurp Arceus.

But at the cost of Grom and Cassia, two of his only friends.

He fell to his knees, then fell across a boulder, crying out uncontrollably. Matheus merely lowered his head, dropping the last belongings of Cassia Zoroark.

 

[Ambyssin]

Well, I see why you wanted to split this off from the stuff in Chapter 16. Because this is quite the wham episode. I mean, literally, the big temple goes WHAM right at the end (*ba-dum-tssssh*)! :V

It's been a little while coming, but we finally got a good guys facing bad guys scenario. As best I can describe it, Arthus does a nice little Zant impersonation here. Or, if Zelda's not your flavor, he's not a bad Hyness. His plan is... not logical in the slightest. And the revelation that he was masquerading as Tursha makes you want to scream, "Well, why didn't you kill Lawrence earlier? Then you'd have avoided the whole 'aura bond' thing entirely." But when you consider that he was pretty much waiting for this moment to try and be as spiteful as he possibly could, I think it's an effective kick in the teeth. I can't speak for other people, but if there is someone out there who was completely indifferent about Arthus up until now, this hopefully changed his or her mind. The lines he's spouting were pretty unhinged, getting more and more desperate the longer this skirmish went into the chapter. And, of course, there's his trickery of Hoopa, too. Which, if I'm honest, I totally saw coming from a mile away. It was really Hoopa's warning. That was a giant, flashing red light that made me absolutely certain that Arthus would go back on his word (or, at least, try to find a loophole).

The battle itself was not necessarily hard-hitting, but I don't see that as a bad thing. There was an "I know you're in there somewhere" fight running in parallel with two "You could be good if you just tried" fights. Cassia's the only one who really seems to make any progress on her side of things. And I'm glad she gets the most focus of the entire fight since, really, her friendship with Grom was one of the highlights for me thus far, and it made what happens to Grom at the end a geuninely sad moment.

Now, with that said, I do have a criticism. When Grom starts to go haywire and destroy the temple, things start to get rather chaotic and the action becomes quite difficult to follow because of the number of things happening at once. Arthus is going back on his word to Hoopa which I think leads to him ending up back in the Prison Bottle. Then, as best I can tell, Grom explodes, possibly killing Cassia from the impact(?) but that's when things get a little bit cloudy for me. I'm not entirely sure what Gardner's really doing in terms of getting the door open... or who he's doing it for, for that matter. Because it sounded like Lawrence was getting through to him, but then Gardner calls out for Arthus' help, which threw me off. Matheus and Lawrence make it out, but it's not made clear to me why he fails to get back to the temple before it collapses, since it cuts back in to Arthus and Gardner. Maybe I shouldn't have read this a day after chemo?

In any event, it was a very shocking, saddening finale. But, I'm confident Arthus escaped with his fixed Seal (and possibly Cassia too). First rule of media: if you can't find the bodies, they ain't dead. And you have, like, 6 or 7 more chapters left. So, something's gotta happen.

 

[lucarioknight56]

It's been a little while coming, but we finally got a good guys facing bad guys scenario. As best I can describe it, Arthus does a nice little Zant impersonation here. Or, if Zelda's not your flavor, he's not a bad Hyness. His plan is... not logical in the slightest.

Well, Zelda is my flavor, and Arthus is a slight bit like Zant. I'm curious to know why it isn't logical, though I feel I may have rsolved some of the issues below.

And the revelation that he was masquerading as Tursha makes you want to scream, "Well, why didn't you kill Lawrence earlier? Then you'd have avoided the whole 'aura bond' thing entirely." But when you consider that he was pretty much waiting for this moment to try and be as spiteful as he possibly could, I think it's an effective kick in the teeth.

Well, there were a variety of factors. For one, he isn't thinking straight. Then there's the fact he wanted to complete multiple things at once (Restoring the Seal, taking back Grom, absorbing Matheus, and retrieving Cassia), all of which were difficult tasks on their own. Plus, having his targets trapped in the temple makes it so they can't escape for some reason. He simply used Lawrence as the vehicle to bring them to the temple because the process of doing so plays off his strengths, which are performance and illusion.

Arthus is pretty spiteful, but really only towards Matheus. Lawrence he simply wants gone thanks to him being a Lucario (and for getting close to Cassia, which he completely didn't expect), he wants Cassia to return to him. Really, it has to do with his timing of completing all the different events at once rather than an extended period of time--with the bonus of having almost nothing go wrong.

And, of course, there's his trickery of Hoopa, too. Which, if I'm honest, I totally saw coming from a mile away. It was really Hoopa's warning. That was a giant, flashing red light that made me absolutely certain that Arthus would go back on his word (or, at least, try to find a loophole).

It's pretty difficult to blindside you with at twist, isn't it?

I'm not entirely sure what Gardner's really doing in terms of getting the door open... or who he's doing it for, for that matter. Because it sounded like Lawrence was getting through to him, but then Gardner calls out for Arthus' help, which threw me off. Matheus and Lawrence make it out, but it's not made clear to me why he fails to get back to the temple before it collapses, since it cuts back in to Arthus and Gardner.

Gardner's mostly opening it for himself, actually. He asked for Arthus' help because he wanted to survive, even if it meant the survival of everyone else. As for Matheus, I tried to make it so that he didn't enter the temple because he knew there wasn't enough time for him to cross to the other side and lug Cassia across.

I can probably revise the parts past Grom's rampage if it is really too hard to follow. I'll just wait for your thoughts here first.

 

[Ambyssin]

Well, Zelda is my flavor, and Arthus is a slight bit like Zant.

Glad I recognized it, then.

For one, he isn't thinking straight.

Yeah. So, when you're not thinking straight, you tend not to plan logically. ^^;

Then there's the fact he wanted to complete multiple things at once (Restoring the Seal, taking back Grom, absorbing Matheus, and retrieving Cassia), all of which were difficult tasks on their own.

Right. I just couldn't help but think that he has made things unnecessarily more difficult by trying to do all of that at the same time. His biggest goal seems to be fixing the Seal. So, things would have gone unquestionably better if he just focused on that and then moved on to taking care of everything else. But that's just me, I suppose. *nervous laugh*

Plus, having his targets trapped in the temple makes it so they can't escape for some reason. He simply used Lawrence as the vehicle to bring them to the temple because the process of doing so plays off his strengths, which are performance and illusion.

That's fine. Seems to me he got too greedy and tried to kill too many birds with one stone, leading things to go a bit belly-up. Which I still find entertaining.

It's pretty difficult to blindside you with at twist, isn't it?

In my defense, I'm, like, 2% pretzel. Twists are just ingrained in me.

Gardner's mostly opening it for himself, actually.

Ahhhh. That makes a lot of sense, actually. In that case, it'd probably make it clearer if you showed a bit more of Gardner's panic and desperation to save his own hide.

As for Matheus, I tried to make it so that he didn't enter the temple because he knew there wasn't enough time for him to cross to the other side and lug Cassia across.

See, you say that. But here's what you actually wrote in the chapter:

Matheus pulled Lawrence out of the Temple and threw him onto the grass, then called out, “I’m coming for you Cassia!”

So, that threw me off. If you want to keep that line, you may need to add a line where Matheus realizes he's not going to be able to save her. Sort of an "ALL IS LOST!" moment, I suppose. Or get rid of that line and rework it to Matheus knowing he can't get Cassia. That'd probably clear up my confusion.

 

[lucarioknight56]

Act 4: The Legend
Chapter 21: Loss

All hope is now gone,

All love now buried.

The darkness has fallen,

Just as light has done.

Silver and Cyan,

The Master and One,

Are now all alone,

On their journey travail.

~~~~

Silence. Only silence. No leaves rustled. No birds sung. A dark and clouded sky ruined the otherwise warm and soothing evening, forcing it into a dark and forbidding tone.

Matheus placed a stray plank of wood atop a careful formation of loose rocks from the temple, situating it in front of the former entrance to the temple. Lawrence stood stiffly, cautiously shifting the bandages wrapped around his chest.

The Legend clapped his paws together, the fur on the back of his head rising. He parted his paws and a narrow stream of blue flame jetted from one. He carefully passed it along the wood, leaving behind a black streak with every pass.

After branding several lines, Matheus blew away the smoke, allowing Lawrence to see his work:

Here Rests

Cassia Zoroark—Priestess of Arceus—Beloved by All

Grom Golurk—Guardian of the Priestess

Arthus Zoroark—The Usurper—Friend and Father

Matheus made a shuddering sigh, then said, “Too many…just too many…” He held a paw over Cassia’s name. “Of all the Pokémon I’ve known, you were the most faithful…even to the end.” He passed his paw over Grom’s name. “I wish I had known you longer. You were a true companion, one that could never be replaced.”

He paused, then lowered to Arthus’ name. “Arthus…” He sighed and shook his head. “You…you were still there…in the end. We could have still been friends—brothers, even. But then…” His paw curled into a fist, then relaxed.

He stepped back and turned to Lawrence. The silver Lucario paused, then sighed. “I’m…I’m sorry, Lawrence. There…there wasn’t enough time, and well, it was too dangerous. You could’ve—” He cut himself short then shook his head. “I’ll just…I’ll just go look for some berries.” He trudged past ferns and roots and went into the trees, leaving Lawrence alone.

Lawrence remained still. His face remained blank.

He winced. He saw the temple. He saw Arthus, holding the Seal for them to see. He saw the scattered fragments of Grom on the floor. He saw…Cassia.

Lawrence closed his eyes and made a shuddering sigh. He held out a paw, gazing at the weak glow that surrounded it. He hugged himself and hunched over, closing his eyes.

He saw himself walking with a Gardevoir through a forest path, first joining this world.

He saw himself with a Gardevoir, in a vale guarded by a Trevenant.

He saw himself with a Gardevoir, pouring his fears out to her.

He saw himself with a Zoroark, reading the Tome across mountains.

He saw himself with a Zoroark, traveling together for the benefit of the world, and each other.

All the while, a black Golurk watched from afar.

All of it for nothing. For death.

He thought of all the time he had spent with her, in the meantime of their travels. Three weeks felt too short a time. He had only just known her, known her troubles, and realized his own…and how she could resolve them.

It would never be.

He felt something rise in him. Anger. Despair. Gathered together. It continued to rise, and he thought of what Cassia had devoted her entire life to:

Arceus.

Lawrence’s paws shook. He saw the sufferings of Pokémon at the hand of the Guild—at the hand of Arthus. He saw the grief of Cassia throughout her life, all through the viciousness of others. He saw himself, insulted for his lack of belief, isolated through his whole life. He had finally found someone to empathize with—and she was taken.

Lawrence grit his teeth, then shook a fist into the sky. “You’ve done nothing for me! NOTHING!” His fist surged with aura, then he threw it into a nearby boulder. The aura burned into the very center, splitting the rock in two.

He panted, slowly removing his paw. He stared at it, watching the aura recede. He fell to his knees and continued to cry. All the while, Matheus watched from the fringe of the palms, bowing his head.

~~~~

Later, Lawrence sat at the base of the tree, holding his Pokédex and studying the screen: “No access point in range.” Yet again, that message taunted him. Never had it felt so insulting.

Matheus came out from the trees, holding a cask dripping with water. He took a long draught, then wiped his lips and coughed. “Arthus really did a number on my throat. Don’t remember him being the throttling type.” He took another drink, then held the cask out to Lawrence. He didn’t move.

Matheus pushed it closer. “You’ve been sitting there ever since we left the temple; you need to sustain yourself, especially after what Arthus did to you.”

Lawrence glanced at the cask, then looked away. He sighed, put away his Pokédex, then accepted the cask and poured water into his mouth. He finished, gave it back to Matheus, and turned away.

Matheus set the cask into the bag. “Look, Lawrence…we can’t stay here. We still need to get to Furnek and Saunte. There’s not much—”

“What’s the point?”

Matheus bristled. “Excuse me?”

“What’s the point of going there?” Lawrence replied. He lay back on the root, ignoring the burning pain on his chest. “Arceus won’t protect them. He didn’t protect Barash, Jareth, Cryus…he’s done nothing. Believing in him won’t make it any better.” He sat straight again, glaring at Matheus. “You could’ve done something. You’ve been alive for two thousand years! You could’ve fought Arthus again and stopped him from taking over! You could’ve kicked the Guild out of Equivos! You could’ve saved Grom and Cassia! Yet you didn’t!” He inhaled sharply, holding his chest and cringing.

Matheus remained still, giving no response. He lowered his head, gazing at the ground.

Lawrence stood up and growled, “Let’s go. Anywhere’s better than here.” He scooped up Cassia’s bag and pushed past Matheus. The Legend pulled the supply bag over his shoulder and followed Lawrence to the south.

Hours passed, and the cawing of Trumbeak and chittering of Emolga returned as lively as before. Lawrence failed to notice, completely absorbed by his march through the Faylen jungle. He took no rest stops, ate no food, and drank no water. He kept pushing between the trees, dwelling on the loss of Cassia and Grom, and how they could have been saved.

Night fell, and Matheus looked up, frowning. “Getting late. We should stop for the day.” Lawrence refused to reply.

Matheus caught up with Lawrence and grabbed his arm. “You’ve done nothing but walk for hours! You haven’t even changed your bandages.” He looked down at Lawrence’s chest and groaned. “They’re filthy. We have to change them.”

Lawrence glared at the Legend, then begrudgingly sat on a root, setting down Cassia’s bag. Matheus sighed, then pulled off his own bag and dug through it for the roll of bandages. He pulled it out and pulled away a layer of Lawrence’s bandages, recoiling after. “It’s going to get worse before it gets better. I’ll need to clean it before anything else.” He took out a cloth and a cask of water, then soaked the cloth.

He pulled away the rest of the bandages. He took a glance up to Lawrence, who looked away. Matheus started to clean the wound, then said, “Years ago, after Arthus betrayed me, we had a long, drawn-out battle. I managed to win, and I took the Seal from him. Then I ran, ignoring the dozens of scratches he gave me.” He held up his arm, the silvery scars visible in the approaching moonlight. “That’s where I got most of these.”

He lowered his arm and finished cleaning Lawrence’s wound. He wrapped the roll around Lawrence’s chest, his paws shaking. “I kept going for days, hating myself for Arthus’ change. I didn’t eat, I didn’t sleep—exactly what you’d do if I let you. And do you know what happened?” Lawrence glanced at Matheus.

He ripped the length of bandage from the roll and exclaimed, “I keeled over! I nearly died because I refused to take care of myself!” He tied the ends of the bandage together, shaking his head. “If those Phantump didn’t find me when they did…”

He stood up, frowning. “I don’t want you wasting your life…the life I managed to save. Cassia wouldn’t either.” He turned around, then paced out of sight. “I’ll go find food.”

Lawrence remained still. He considered the Legend’s words, thinking of Cassia and Grom. ‘I only just accepted Arceus again…but ever since…the temple.” He lowered his head sadly. ‘I’ve just been the same as before.’ Suddenly, he heard Matheus’ words in Cassia’s voice: “I don’t want you wasting your life…the life I managed to save.” He sat straighter. ‘She worked with me till the end to make me this way…yet here I am, back at square one.’

The sadness and anger from the temple rose up once more. ‘I won’t forget what she did for me…I’ll keep myself strong, so her memory can be.’ He curled his fist. ‘But it’s thanks to Matheus that she isn’t here.’

Lawrence kept his fist tight for a moment, then froze. ‘Or was it me?’ He flinched. ‘I listened Tursha’s—Arthus’ words. I brought everyone to the temple.’ He leaned down and pressed his paws against his head. ‘Matheus might not have saved Cassia, but it was my fault that we even ended up there. Arthus might’ve had the Seal, but Grom and Cassia wouldn’t be…dead.’

He sat straighter, clutching his head. ‘It was my fault. I shouldn’t have listened to him! I shouldn’t have listened to him!’ he thought, the words repeating in his mind. He teared up, regretting ever following the words of the false seer of Arceus that ultimately lead to his own demise.

His thoughts were interrupted as Matheus came out from the trees, carrying a bundle of small green berries in his arms. Lawrence quickly composed himself as Matheus held one up. “Found a bunch of Lum berries,” he said. “Pretty bland, but they’re filling, and they’re good medicine too.” He popped it into his mouth and shrugged. “Better than nothing.”

He handed some off to Lawrence, then sat next to him continued to eat his berries. As they ate, he pointed to his right and said, “We keep heading south for two days or so and we’ll be in the Iren desert. Two days after that, we’ll be in the Velcan Range, where Mount Furnek is. Then it’ll take three days to cross the desert and get over to Saunte.” He lowered the berries, concentrating. “I…I think I’ll be going to sleep now.” He threw the remaining berries in his mouth and finished them, then slid off the root onto the soft earth below. He pulled his hat over his eyes, leaving Lawrence to finish eating.

The younger Lucario ate several more, then looked down at the berries. He wrinkled his nose, then threw away the rest. He slid down the other side of the root and made himself comfortable. He felt all the day’s tiredness hit him at once, setting him swiftly to sleep, despite the nightmarish thoughts that plagued him.

~~~~

Gray. Lawrence saw only gray. He didn’t notice himself in his human form, only that this dreamscape appeared to be a haze of darkness.

A bulge appeared in front of him, then extended skyward, darkening into coarse brown bark. Two massive limbs stretched from the center, sharp claws separating into digits. A plume of emerald-green leaves erupted from its top, and the bottom separated into a series of root-like feet. A hanging black maw opened beneath the leaves, and a single, ruby eye flashed awake above it. The Trevenant of the Revenant Woods.

The Trevenant’s eye narrowed. “The end of days approaches, and the Keeper has not come to be. Even now, the Tree of Life absorbs the Life that remains in the soil, preparing for this final calamity.” The Trevenant stopped, noticing the tears that stained Lawrence’s face. “Why do you suffer so?”

Lawrence lowered his head, avoiding the piercing gaze of the Trevenant. “Cassia’s gone…Grom’s dead…two of my only friends here.” He made a shuddering sigh, then looked up to the Trevenant. “Why did you give me and Cassia that prophecy? I don’t know who this Keeper is, and Aleron can’t be awakened. And with Cassia…dead…” He shook his head. “I should’ve known that Tursha—Arthus—lied. Then they’d still be here.”

The Trevenant enclosed Lawrence with a claw, moaning and creaking. “The Usurper’s tricks manipulate the mind. Many have fallen to his lies; in his mind, the ends justify the means.” He raised his arm, pointing at the sky. “I am deeply sorry for the suffering he put upon you…however, the words of the prophecy must come to pass if Equivos is to be saved.”

“But how am I supposed to do that if Aleron is dead? Matheus said he couldn’t be brought back!” Lawrence exclaimed.

The gray sky darkened, and pinpricks of light clustered together, forming the constellations that Lawrence knew from Unova and Sinnoh. The Trevenant’s mouth creaked into a grin. “Stars are a wondrous gift from the Creator. He made them to guide us, to show us the way to what we seek. Just as stars, the influence of the guides of this world shine bright, leading Pokémon to where they should be.” He gestured to himself. “I am a star. The Legends are stars. Aleron is a star. Arceus created us to be guides to all who seek him, and to know the best course to return to him, and to those we love.” He held his arms out and bellowed, “‘The truth once held must take once more for the Keeper to be awakened for war. Awaken Aleron, as well as the Keeper, and Equivos may be reborn to live on.’” The Trevenant narrowed his gaze once more. “Remember my words.”

Lawrence stepped forward, holding his arms out. “But Aleron’s dead!”

The sky lightened to gray once more, and gray mist wrapped around the Trevenant’s limbs. “Matheus Lucario is a servant of Arceus. Ask him what you will in Arceus’ name, and he is obligated to answer. Heed this counsel, and Aleron may awaken once more.” The Trevenant faded completely into mist, then the cloud surrounded Lawrence’s vision. He woke.

~~~~

Lawrence’s eyes opened slowly. He shifted his arm and felt what seemed to be rope. He looked at his chest and saw glowing red tendrils receding from his chest and sinking into the ground, their light dimming.

He pushed against his chest, feeling no pain. He peeked under the bandages and saw pristine fur completely untouched by any wound. Sighing with relief, he pulled off the bandages, grateful for the Trevenant’s coming.

“Who did it?”

Lawrence sat upright and twisted around, finding Matheus standing behind him, his arms crossed, brow furrowed. “Who healed you? Those gashes would’ve taken weeks to heal, yet here you are, like new.”

Lawrence scraped his paw against the ground, remembering the dream. “The Trevenant…he came to me and must’ve healed me.”

Matheus’ eyes widened. “The Trevenant of the Revenant Woods?” Lawrence nodded.

The Legend turned away with a grim expression. “So…it’s come to that.” He closed his eyes. “What did he say to you?”

The Trevenant’s words rang clearly in Lawrence’s mind. He recounted what the Trevenant taught him, from the environment of the dream, to the last words of warning.

After he finished, Matheus set a paw on Lawrence’s shoulder. “None of it was your fault, Lawrence. I was fooled too. I should’ve seen Arthus’ aura under that disguise.” He rubbed his chin. “Still…what he said is true. The last day is approaching.”

Lawrence lowered his eyes. “You mean the Day of Desolation, don’t you?” Matheus nodded. “When is it?”

Matheus shrugged. “Even I don’t know. The signs just point to it. Life is indeed leaving the ground and going to the Tree of Life. Yveltal awakened years ago, and a priestess has come forth to preach his word one final time. The only sign left is the final one: The Legends calling one final time, saying that they have come to destroy Equivos.” Matheus shook Lawrence and said, “That’s why we have to go to Furnek and Saunte, even without Cassia. Every Pokémon in Serenita needs the chance to embrace Arceus before that day, no matter how far it may be in the future.

Lawrence looked around him sadly. ‘I don’t all this to go; Sinnoh and Unova are only shadows of this place because of how men developed it. Serenita was free from that. Yet it’s going to be gone.’

“Will…will everyone die?” Lawrence asked.

Matheus forced a smile. “No…but unfortunately, many will.” He took a deep breath, then pointed to his right. “We best get going. Furnek is a three-day trip, then another three days to Saunte. We can’t waste any time.” He leered at Lawrence. “But we’ll still be taking breaks. Understood?” Lawrence nodded sharply in reply, then they continued their journey to the volcanic Mount Furnek.

Over the next two days, they continued in relative silence. Lawrence still felt the stabbing pains of being without Cassia and Grom. Each time he closed his eyes, he hoped for the childlike Golurk to pop behind him and say his signature phrase, ‘Grom,’ to make him jump, or for Cassia to come over to him and show him another phrase from the Arceist Tome. But neither happened. Only Matheus’ occasional babble about the environment came—none of it a replacement for what was lost.

Finally, after two days, the tall and winding palms of the Faylen jungle thinned out into stout and sturdy cacti, rooted in coarse, arid sand rather than moist, rich soil. A seemingly-endless sea of sand stretched before them, the occasional Trapinch or Sandile skittering across its surface. Vibrava jittered in the breeze, veering away from the Vikavolt that soared high above them, seeking a suitable meal to zap.

Matheus stopped next to Lawrence, then pointed to their right. Across the sand, a hump belching black soot rose, surrounded by a patch of black rock. “There’s the Velcan range. Real far away, despite how close it looks. Rather not be in such a place, to be frank, but it’s the last major settlement outside Saunte that never heard about Arceus.” He raised a paw and said, “Did you know that Cassia spent most of her two years finding all the smaller settlements scattered around? There’s not too many of them, but they’re real far apart, and with Pokémon in dire need of some help.” He grinned, pushing back his hat. “Even if they weren’t on the map, she still found it in her heart to help them.”

He noticed Lawrence’s glum expression at the mention of the Zoroark. He held his head and grit his teeth, then said, “Sorry…I know it still hurts.”

“It’s fine,” Lawrence croaked. He stepped onto the warm sand, turning to look study the horizon. Parallel to the distant Mount Furnek was an outcropping of reddish stone, forming a valley in the center. “What’s that over there?”

Matheus scowled. “The Guild.” He spat on the sand. “Arthus and I chose that place because of its defensibility. An underwater spring, fresh soil, and only one good way in or out.” He clenched his fist. “If it wasn’t for the underground escape tunnel we built into it, I could never have gotten inside with Laryon all those years ago.”

“What was Equivos like in your time?”

Matheus blinked. “I…well, it’s…changed…” He groaned, massaging his temple. “Well, there were more wild Pokémon around. Dangerous ones, at that. It was such a problem that Pokémon were hiring mercenaries to rescue them if they got trapped. I made the Guild to make the entire process more organized.” He walked toward Furnek, waving his arms behind him. “Of course, since then, pretty much all the wild Pokémon are docile. Nothing like my day. You had to constantly worry about Arbok coming in your sleep, or a stampede of Tauros tearing across the plains. All of them are gone now, along with the outlaws that defied Guild control.” Lawrence followed the Legend as he mused.

“Ah, what a day to be alive,” Matheus said. “It was a golden age once the Guild was restored. Two thousand years of peace, with only wild Pokémon and the occasional Outlaw to ruin someone’s day.” He growled. “Until Arthus returned.”

Knowing he was treading unstable ground, yet still wanting to learn more, Lawrence asked, “Why was he put into the Cocoon? Why wasn’t he just executed?”

“Me personally, I never wanted to see Arthus dead; in that time, he did horrible things, but I still loved him like a brother…mostly.” He shook his head. “Arceus didn’t see fit to kill Arthus either, despite what he did. While I don’t know all his reasoning, I believe he thought that Arthus would change over his incarceration.” He snorted. “If only it wasn’t for the worse.”

Sensing that Matheus had answered enough questions, Lawrence backed away. The Legend continued to scowl, dwelling on age-old events harrowed up by the inquisitive Lucario.

The continual grief for Cassia once again returned, the momentary distraction doing nothing to stop it. ‘She could have helped me so much—with my thoughts, my fears, everything. Even to awaken Aleron, as impossible as it seems.’ He kept thinking about the impossibility of these events, why he even had to complete them, and why he should even care. All the while, Cassia kept circling in his mind, even until the late evening, when Matheus finally halted their trek.

“Well, we made good progress today. Might be able to make it by noon tomorrow, actually.” Matheus set his bag down and dug through it. “Might as well rest up here. Could maybe get some training done in the morning.” He looked over to Lawrence. “You think you’d feel up to that?”

Lawrence sat down, nodding. He went to open the bag over his shoulder but stopped. He hadn’t inspected what she left behind until now. It might prove too much for him to bear.

He left the bag alone and set it on the ground. A sheet of paper poked out of it, folded together. Curious, Lawrence carefully pulled out the paper and unfolded it. The prophecy of the Trevenant lay within.

He sat down, reading it. Cassia had underlined portions of the text, adding in notes of what she thought each of the lines meant. Toward the bottom, she heavily circled the line ‘Awaken Aleron,’ and wrote to the side ‘Ask Matheus.’

“What are you in the mood for tonight? Lum, or Lum?” Matheus asked, taking out a sack. He looked over to Lawrence with a sly grin, which disappeared upon noticing the paper. “What is that?”

Lawrence set a paw over the circled text. “Who was Aleron?”

Matheus lowered the bag of berries. “I told you what I was willing to say.”

“What else is there?”

“It’s not your business to know,” Matheus warned.

“It is my business to know,” Lawrence replied, his grip tightening on the paper. “The Trevenant wanted me to find him. I don’t know why, I don’t know how, but I need to do it!”

Matheus stood up, holding his paws apart. “He. Is. Dead. End of story. I will not talk about him!”

Lawrence fumed and held the paper in front of Matheus. “Cassia thought it was important! She wanted to know more about him, and you told her nothing!” Lawrence exhaled sharply, then said, “If you really want to help me, you will tell me more about him.” Matheus glared at Lawrence, barely shaking his head.

Lawrence remembered his dream, and the final advice the Trevenant had given him. “In the name of Arceus, you will tell me everything you know about Aleron.”

Matheus’ eyes widened in surprise. He furrowed his brow, then rocked his head back in forth. He growled, then sat on an opposing rock and took off his hat. He set it on his lap, then rubbed his temple “It’s…more complicated than you think.” He held up the hat, inspecting it, then sighed. “You see…I really haven’t done that much to help Equivos. Sure, I helped imprison Arthus years ago, but I’m the one responsible for creating him. I created the Guild to help Pokémon, but it ended up hurting them instead.” He lowered the hat. “Even after I was resurrected, I felt like I did little to deserve it. I helped Pokémon, sure, but it was only rarely. Honestly, I spent my time watching from afar, in the Tree of Life…away from the Pokémon I failed.” He crimped the edges of the hat, avoiding Lawrence’s gaze.

He brushed a paw through his silver fur. “It wasn’t until Arceus gave me a certain assignment that I felt like I truly was making up for my mistakes. I became the perfect example of what an Arceist was supposed to be: selfless, caring, obedient, and humble, all because I felt like I was forgiven.” He set his hat back on his head, “I was to go out into the world and gather the writings of his prophets. Then I needed to bind them into a book, then make copies for all Pokémon to read, to know his word.”

Lawrence blinked, then cocked his head. “Wait a minute. I thought—”

“Yes, yes, Aleron did those things,” Matheus sighed. He winced, then said, “You see…”

“I am Aleron.”

~~~~

Across the eastern ocean of Equivos, on the continent of Deitae, a magnificent golden tree towered over the Luminescent Woods. The glowing bulbs of light popped from the soil and into the sky, shining over the domains of the Legends of Equivos.

The golden bark of the tree reflected the multi-colored leaves, all coursing with peculiar energy. The roots ingrained themselves in the center of the woods at the center of the continent, spreading across the entire clearing. Pulses of crimson light shot through the roots, soaking into the source of life itself.

Perched atop the tree was a giant onyx creature, its wings folded over its chest. Its claws clamped around the uppermost boughs, its crimson underbelly pulsing with each glow of the root. Its silvery-blue eyes gazed across the continent, then to the distant coast of Serenita beyond.

“Remain watchful, children of Arceus. The time draws nigh for the end of Life, and I shall not be prevented from ending those unfaithful. All within Serenita shall fall…” He spread his wings and fanned his tail, surging his Y-shaped body with Life energy.

“At the wings of Yveltal.”

 

[Ambyssin]

I appreciate how somber the atmosphere is to start this off. There isn't a ton of description. But this is one of those scenes where I don't really think you should explain every little detail. This feels like a less is more situation. And the body language definitely does the job in that reagard. You also don't drag it out for too long. It clearly hits them both hard, and Lawrence's single shout I think is enough to show how hurt he is in that instant. And I also like how, in Lawrence's anger, he snaps at Matheus. He's asking some of the questions that I did, so I feel a bit justified in my earlier thinking. It's even better considering Matheus doesn't exactly address Lawrence's accusations, instead trying to instill in him how important it is that he keep carrying on anyway. A good answer, but one that's not the most helpful toward someone who's grieving.

The rest of the chapter is spent mostly with light conversation and some silent contemplating. Because it's relatively quiet, it makes the rather sudden reveal of Matheus being Aleron a lot more surprising. I think I had guessed it'd involve Lawrence, but having it be the only other Lucario in the story isn't too far off. *nervous laugh*

Honestly, I do think the direction here works to the chapter's benefit. If you were worried about this being too short and being a bad thing, I don't see it that way. Especially because this chapter actually made me rather uncertain as to where things are going to go from here. I still strongly believe Cassia and Arthus are alive, at the very least. If that does turn out to be true, then I'd say your decision to list every chapter in the opening post (including the unreleased ones) had a bit of a detrimental effect. Of course, if she's really gone, then that was some impressive trolling on your part. I think Cassia may be tied into this Keeper part of the prophecy. But this chapter does put a dent in the idea that she and Arthus are alive. Especially since Matheus indicates we're marching toward an apocalypse and Yveltal seems to have stepped into... uh... not the antagonistic role, per se... but certainly the ominous force that's going to bring about the end of everything.

Anyway, that's all I got. Nice work!

 

[lucarioknight56]

And I also like how, in Lawrence's anger, he snaps at Matheus. He's asking some of the questions that I did, so I feel a bit justified in my earlier thinking. It's even better considering Matheus doesn't exactly address Lawrence's accusations, instead trying to instill in him how important it is that he keep carrying on anyway. A good answer, but one that's not the most helpful toward someone who's grieving.

Well, your questions were partially what inspired these lines, actually. This story would actually have taken a rather different direction in character development if it weren't for your input for Chapters 1 ~ 9. You've been an invaluable reviewer in that respect.

The rest of the chapter is spent mostly with light conversation and some silent contemplating. Because it's relatively quiet, it makes the rather sudden reveal of Matheus being Aleron a lot more surprising. I think I had guessed it'd involve Lawrence, but having it be the only other Lucario in the story isn't too far off. *nervous laugh*

Managed to pull a twist out from under you, huh?

I still strongly believe Cassia and Arthus are alive, at the very least. If that does turn out to be true, then I'd say your decision to list every chapter in the opening post (including the unreleased ones) had a bit of a detrimental effect.

Yeah, I can agree with that. In hindsight, I should've just left the ending date up (June 9th) and that's it. I won't make the same mistake for the prequel story, Legends Awakened. Thanks for the review!

 

[Ambyssin]

Well, your questions were partially what inspired these lines, actually. This story would actually have taken a rather different direction in character development if it weren't for your input for Chapters 1 ~ 9. You've been an invaluable reviewer in that respect.

Always happy to help where I can. ^^

Yeah, I can agree with that. In hindsight, I should've just left the ending date up (June 9th) and that's it. I won't make the same mistake for the prequel story, Legends Awakened.

If you intend to say when it'll end, don't indicate how often you plan on updating. Because then you'd still be able to tell how far you have to go.

 

[lucarioknight56]

Chapter 22: Change


Aleron is known,

A death of mind.

The Keeper now awakens,

For all to find.

The love still remains,

Just and kind.

Let Arceus be praised,

For leaving misery behind.

~~~~

Matheus averted his eyes from Lawrence’s gaze. They sat across from each other, ignoring the sand that swept through the air by the wind.

After moments of silence, Matheus finally said, “Yes, I’m Aleron. I used that name as a pseudonym while I traveled; my reputation as the guardian of Laryon Lucario would have brought too much attention upon myself if I went by my own name.”

Lawrence leaned in closer. “Why didn’t you say any of this before?

“Because I’m ashamed, that’s why!” Matheus exclaimed. “I never wanted to tell anyone because of how I left them!” He exhaled, then shook his head. “I didn’t want to tell you, but now that you know…might as well.”

He shifted uncomfortably on the rock. “When I was first assigned by Arceus to assemble the Arceist Tome three hundred years ago, I thought I was useless. Equivos remembers me for training Laryon and helping him save the world by taking a fatal blow from Arthus.” He spat. “It wasn’t as noble as you think. Sure, I trained him, but only out of duty; it wasn’t until the end that I actually loved him as my nephew. I would’ve just wandered Equivos as a broken Pokémon, reeling over Arthus’ betrayal till the day I died. Instead, I was dragged into a quest to save a little Riolu’s dear aunt—my sister.” He stared off into space, distant.

He blinked, then said, “Anyway, about Aleron. I hadn’t done much but look out on Equivos through the Tree of Life since I got there; the last time I interacted with any mortal Pokémon was when Laryon was alive. He’d been dead for generations when Arceus requested for me. So naturally, I was hesitant.

“But as it was my duty to obey him, I complied. I started gathering writings, and when they asked for my name, I came up with Aleron.” He looked up, reminiscing. “That was when I finally felt like I was doing something worthwhile. I began helping the towns out with the outlaws and wild Pokémon, sometimes working with the Guild. I became enthralled in the work that I had left for centuries.” He sighed contentedly.

Matheus paused, continuing to look to the sky. After a few moments, Lawrence asked, “What changed?”

Matheus’ grin disappeared. “After a hundred years of gathering the writings of Arceus’ prophets and making dozens of copies, Arceus asked me if I enjoyed serving Equivos the way I had. I said I did.” He grimaced, leaning forward. “He said he was pleased with the great service I had done. He told me that Legends such as myself were not supposed to have regular interactions with mortal Pokémon, due to the great influence we tend to have over their activities.” He clasped his paws together. “So, he gave me a choice: I could continue roving Equivos, or I could return to the Tree of Life, coming out once a month to serve. The cost…” He turned away. “My immortality.”

Lawrence’s eyes widened as he leaned back. “That’s…that’s surprising.”

Matheus nodded. “I know. I asked if something else could be done, but he said no. He set the laws on how Legends could interact with Pokémon, and even I, a former mortal, had to obey them—and he could do nothing to change them, considering that the other Legends would have taken advantage of it.” He pulled his hat over his eyes. “You can guess what I chose.”

“But why?” Lawrence blurted. “Didn’t you like what you did? What’s the point of living if you can’t do what you love?”

“Because, Lawrence, I’m a shoddy brawler,” Matheus groaned. “Look, I know I can beat up a bunch of Guild Pokémon with little trouble, but I was on even grounds with Arthus and I couldn’t handle Grom when he went berserk.” He readjusted his hat, staring at the ground. “It doesn’t help that my aura’s been weaker ever since Arthus went off the deep end. If it wasn’t for Laryon, well…” He rubbed his eyes. “Point is, I chose immortality over service. Oh, I still got to go around for a little bit, but it just wasn’t as often or...satisfying.”

He stopped and looked at Lawrence. “The reason why I did was because I’m reckless. That’s how I’ve always been, always will be. I’d go in and do the craziest things just to save a couple of Pokémon, and half-killed myself each and every time.” He growled and shook his head. “If it wasn’t for Arthus keeping me in line, I’d have been dead the first day out of Quantus.” He rubbed his shoulder, looking away. “So, I wanted to make sure that if I did anything stupid, I’d at least live to tell the tale.”

Matheus held up a finger. “But if I had the chance to change my answer, I would. At least if I had said no to immortality, I’d have been more careful…and, well, I wouldn’t have to live through Arthus ruining the world twice over.” He grimaced. “It was painful enough the first time.”

Lawrence remained silent, considering his words. After a moment, he said, “Did you ever…go back, after that?”

Matheus sighed. “No. No I didn’t. After I realized the choice I made—myself over others—I didn’t feel worthy. It just reminded me of when I isolated myself for ten years, regretting my decision to complete the Trials and allowing Arthus to become who he is.” He shivered. “That was a dark time. I only thought of how I could have made things different, how I was the reason Arthus’ wife died, how I caused Laryon’s parents to die—even if I didn’t know how or why they happened.” He exhaled waveringly. “I know now it was really Arthus’ fault, in some way…but I couldn’t help but feel that. All because I thought I was strong enough to defeat Arceus’ greatest challenge.” He swallowed. “I was. But I wasn’t for the consequences.”

Matheus’ gaze hardened, then he sat straight. “I can’t be Aleron. Not anymore. He was selfless, kind, and devout. I’m none of those things. Not since I refused Arceus’ will.” He stood up, stormed away from Lawrence, then sat on the side. He lay on his side and tersely said, “Get to sleep. We’ve got a long way to Furnek.”

Lawrence stared at Matheus, processing what he had admitted to. He got off the rock and lay on the cool sand, rolling onto his side. The distant green of the Faylen Jungle stood in view, reminding him of Cassia’s fate.

He slept fitfully that night.

~~~~

The next morning, Lawrence woke up to see Matheus standing on a boulder sticking out from the sand. His back faced the younger Lucario as he stood, looking out toward the distant canyon walls of The Guild.

Lawrence carefully approached Matheus, studying the hazy vision. The ruddy brown of the sheer cliffs contrasted sharply with the bland yellow and white of the fine grains of sand. Black shapes flitted in and out of the walls, all going different directions. The rising heat formed what appeared to be vast pools of water around the walls, what Lawrence knew to be a mere mirage.

He stopped at the foot of the boulder. The Legend gazed at the cliff, his eyes squinted and jaw firm. His tail hung limp behind him, not standing tall as it once did.

Without turning, Matheus said, “I remember the day Arthus and I saw that canyon. We had just escaped from some thugs in Saunte and had found Barash. After we recovered, we saw the canyon walls and wanted to see how it was inside.”

Matheus smiled. “Some Trapinch pits and Charjabug nests later, we found it. We were amazed by the sheer size of it; you could keep an entire town in it.” He raised a finger. “And Arthus said to me, ‘Someday, we’ll come back here. We’ll live here, have families, and help others, side by side.’” His smile disappeared. “We made the Guild. He married. I left. When I came back, nothing was the same. It was all twisted and corrupted, thanks to Arthus and his accursed servant, Gregorius.” He stiffened. “I confronted him. I won, but I didn’t feel like it. I ran. I blamed myself for what happened, and it’s thanks to me the world is…was, in danger.”

He faced Lawrence. “I don’t deserve to be a Legend, Lawrence. I failed you. I failed Cassia. I failed Grom, Arthus…everyone I’ve known. Yet here I am, still serving Arceus, like I actually matter.” He held up a paw. “Don’t talk to me about this. Just…just leave me alone.” He hopped off the boulder and brushed past the other Lucario. He picked up the supply bag, then steadily paced toward Mount Furnek. Lawrence followed with Cassia’s bag, his head low and eyes narrowed.

No words passed between them throughout the hike. Except for the occasional food and water break, Matheus remained several paces ahead of Lawrence, never looking back.

This continued until evening fell once more, when they finally stopped. The charred and burning environment of the Velcan range now spread across the edge of the Iren Desert, surrounding the enormous volcano of Mount Furnek. Sparks and smoke spat from the vent into the sky, raining down on the crowded town wrapped around it below.

Matheus set down the supply bag, his face dull. Lawrence carefully did the same with his own, then approached the other bag. “What’s for tonight?” he asked.

Matheus didn’t reply. He turned toward Mount Furnek. “I can’t do it.”

Lawrence cocked his head. “Do what?”

“I can’t teach Furnek. The last time I saw the place was centuries ago, yet there’s one Pokémon who’d surely remember me: Vignon. He’d be a Darmanitan by now, likely in stone form. But he’d remember me. I helped him get adopted into a kind Simisear family in Furnek, and I promised to see him every month after that.” He bowed his head. “A few weeks later, Arceus made his offer. I never came back.” He groaned. “He’s surely told them stories on the mighty feats of ‘Aleron’ through the entire Velcan Range. They’ll know the truth of my identity if he saw me, and I can’t live through that.” He shook his head. “But we can’t leave them. Lawrence, you have to teach them.”

Lawrence stepped back, holding his paws out. “But I’ve never done that before! What makes you think I can do it?”

“You listened to Cassia, didn’t you? Use her as an example.”

“Yeah, and I’ve only believed again for a little over a week!”

“You believe, don’t you?”

“Yes, but—”

Matheus grabbed Lawrence’s shoulder and pulled him closer. “Do you trust in him? Trust that he knows what is best for you, trust that what he does is right?”

Lawrence blinked. He looked away, remembering his experiences before he came to Equivos—the Nidoking, the church, the Houndour. The feelings of loneliness and distrust rang clear in his mind from those alone.

Then the loss of Grom and Cassia.

Lawrence pulled away, setting a paw on his head. “I-I’m not sure. It’s…it’s hard to say.”

Matheus narrowed his eyes. “It’s one thing to believe in Arceus and to realize he helps us. It’s another thing to trust in him to do what’s right.” He turned away and crouched over the supply bag. He dug through it and said, “That trust is what separates Arceists from the non-believers—or Arthus, to an extreme.” He pulled out the water casks and held them out. “I’m going to fill these up. I don’t want the Pokémon of Furnek to have a faithless teacher, so consider my words.” He brushed past Lawrence and went south, moving away from Furnek.

Lawrence sat to himself, dwelling on what Matheus had said. His thoughts gradually turned to Cassia, and what she had done to preach to Equivos. And himself.

‘She always took a story from the Tome,’ he thought. ‘Then applied it to the issue they had in life.’ He took his Pokédex and entered the files from the Tome—only to realize one crucial thing:

‘I don’t know any stories!’

He turned off the screen and growled, holding his head. ‘I’m useless for this! I don’t even know if I should trust Arceus!’ He stopped. He looked down, focusing on Cassia’s bag.

He stared. ‘I haven’t looked inside since she…died.’ He reached for it, then drew back his paw. ‘Should I? This is her personal stuff…I’ve only really seen inside once.’ He thought back to that fateful day, picking apples with Cassia, when her mask fell into view.

He swallowed hard, then reached for the bag. ‘I—I think I should.’ He pulled the flap off the bag, revealing the darkness inside.

Lawrence took a deep breath, then carefully placed a searching paw inside. He felt around for a moment, then grabbed a small parcel. He pulled it out and found it was the mask he remembered only minutes before.

He opened the drawstring bag and allowed the mask to slide out onto his paw. The white mask reflected the moonlight, surrounding the pitch-black gauze of the eyes. He held the mask up to his face and looked through it. The gauze made the environment slightly darker, but otherwise fully visible.

He lowered the mask. ‘This was Cassia’s last reminder of Arianne…the one who taught her about the Tome.’ He rubbed its surface, smiling. ‘She always wore this to hide her eyes…’ He put the mask back into its bag. ‘I wish she didn’t have to hide herself like that.’ Reaching into Cassia’s belongings once more, he grabbed what felt like a long rod.

Lawrence lifted the rod and found it was a small, ornate mirror. The frame and handle were both made of polished silver, and the oval surface of the mirror was polished as well.

He gazed into it, finding it odd that Cassia would have such a belonging. He flipped it around and saw there was a message inscribed on the back:

To my dearest Cassia,

A daughter more precious than the world.

When you look into this mirror,

Don’t think of anyone else.

Don’t think of their lies, their deceits, their illusions.

Think only of the purity that is you.

Arthus Zoroark,

Your Father

Lawrence held the mirror away, amazed. ‘I always thought Arthus was just a monster. But...maybe he was more than that?’ He remembered the brief glimpses Cassia gave of her past, and how much she had loved Arthus.

He passed his paw over the message. ‘I can agree with him on one thing: Cassia was pure.’ He sighed. ‘I wish she didn’t have to hide herself.’ He set the mirror down next to the mask. ‘I guess she wanted to remember all the good Arthus had.’ He reached into Cassia’s bag once more, finding a small book.

He opened it and saw dozens of names, all lined through the few pages inside. Most of the pages were filled with names of Pokémon, while the last two seemed to indicate entire cities. All but two had a line crossed through them: Furnek and Saunte.

‘She wanted to reach everybody, everywhere…no matter how long it took.’ He looked down at the bottom of the last page and blinked. ‘Lawrence Lucario’ was circled and had a line through it. The line appeared more recent.

‘She…she fought so hard…for me to believe. Even when I refused.’ Lawrence thought of the times she sat next to her to read from the Tome, learning scripture and how he should apply them to his life. He unfortunately remembered few, but their messages still rang true to him.

He set down the book and reached into the bag once more. He pulled out a small sack, covered in black dust and patches. Peering inside, he found a collection of various lengths of charcoal, along with several blobs of clay and a small knife.

‘Her drawing utensils,’ Lawrence thought. He thought of her drawing in each new environment, perfectly capturing the details with her charcoal. Whenever she wasn’t teaching, she was always sitting with Grom, drawing and chatting with the black Golurk.

Lawrence swallowed hard, setting down the bag. ‘Now that can’t happen anymore.’

He felt three pads of paper within the bag, with two smaller and newer than the other. He brought the newer ones out and flipped one open, seeing scattered drawings of various figures, such as a flower, an Eevee, and a house.

Lawrence smiled. ‘These must be from when she started out.’ He turned the page and saw more practice drawings, each getting progressively better. He flipped through the other, finding more of the same, then reached into the bag, meeting with a leather-bound pad of paper. He gingerly pulled it out, knowing it to be Cassia’s sketchpad. The beaten leather cover had her first initial, ‘C’, printed on it—likely because of Arthus—and the brown thread binding the pages at the top still had faint traces of red in its weave.

He passed his paw over the aged leather, then flipped over the cover and saw a massive wooden gate set in rock, with limp branches and leaves sticking out from the top. Although he had never seen this gate, he knew where it was: “The Guild.” Despite the harsh environment he envisioned for it, the gate held a somber, almost beautiful quality to it, like it was meant to be a guardian to those within rather than a jailer.

He turned to the next page and saw a Gardevoir standing in a vast plain, looking toward the horizon. Lawrence knew her to be Arianne, Cassia’s former teacher. He remembered how much Cassia loved her, and how she had taught the Zoroark to be the perfect priestess.

The next page showed the Gardevoir with a Gallade, and Lawrence remembered the brief glimpses he saw of Cassia the night Arianne died: of her running across the plains into the forest, attacking the Weavile. But then she calmed, understanding that the aged Gardevoir would be at peace.

‘At peace,’ Lawrence thought. ‘Just like Cassia.’ No more worries, pains, sufferings, prejudice. She never had to worry about these afflictions anymore, untimely as it was. Cassia set aside her hatred, because she chose not to blame Arceus for the troubles of the world—unlike Arthus had done—but instead trust Arceus to somehow remove them.

Lawrence blinked, connections forming in his mind. He flipped through the next few pages, going through the various portraits and landscapes until he found one he recognized: a Golurk holding a Fletchling on his finger in the middle of a glade.

He set his paw over the picture. He remembered that moment well. It was such a little thing then, but now he wished he could relive it, if only to see Grom again. And Cassia.

He turned the page and saw the Iren Desert, overlooking the city of Barash. The first day he saw Cassia’s true form.

He turned again and saw himself standing in a glade with Cassia and Grom, along with the Buneary they had saved. The second time he saved Pokémon.

He kept turning pages, remembering the Eastern Coast and Hydren, where he discovered Cassia’s lie. Xilo and its peaks, where his aura finally awakened. The Faylen jungle, where he finally realized that—

‘I loved her.’

Lawrence stared at the image of the jungle. ‘She was always doing what was best for others, even if they hated how she really looked like,’ he thought, ‘Even for me, someone who hated what she believed.’ He held up his paw. ‘She didn’t care what happened to her…as long as she could bring Pokémon to Arceus.’ He closed the pad. ‘She trusted in him completely to save them…and herself.’

He paused. He did remember a story: the Timburr and the trees, where he planted them, expecting to have wood to harvest. When none came after weeks of waiting, he left them, only for them to grow into a mighty forest. But he never returned, because he thought that seeds never grew to be trees.

‘He believed…he trusted the seeds to grow…and they did.’ Lawrence held a paw to his head. ‘I used to trust Arceus, but then I didn’t. And I’ve been miserable since.’ He held up the pad. ‘Cassia trusted Arceus…she was happy.’ He lowered the pad. ‘Until the end.’

A folded piece of paper slipped out from the back of the pad and fell on the ground. Lawrence cocked his head, picked up the paper, then unfolded it. Inside was an intricate drawing of himself, Matheus, Grom, and Cassia. Lawrence stood in the center, while Matheus was to his right, Cassia to his left, and Grom standing behind. Matheus and Cassia both wrapped an arm over Lawrence’s shoulders, while Grom crouched and leaned forward, embracing everyone. All of them smiled at Lawrence.

Lawrence’s stared in amazement at the portrait. ‘When did she draw this?’ He looked down and saw the words ‘Remember us, Lawrence!’ elegantly drawn at the bottom—along with another piece of paper behind the drawing.

He shuffled the drawing behind the other, revealing long, spidery letters lining the paper. Lawrence read:

Dear Lawrence,

By the time you read this, you’ll probably be back home in Unova. I understand why you had to leave, but I’ll still miss you. I was hoping we could make a life here in Equivos after we were done in Saunte, but now that you’re gone, well, I’ll have to stay with Grom.

But I don’t want to find someone else. You’re one of the few Pokémon I’ve really felt comfortable around, and the only one that wasn’t old or a Golurk. There’s too much hatred toward Zoroark like me to find someone who will appreciate me like you.

I wish I could have come with you to Unova. I’ve seen everything in Equivos, and as much as I love this place, it won’t be the same without you. I don’t care what your world would think of me; I just want to be with you.

I know that it’s dangerous for me, and you’d never let me go because of that. So I didn’t push that. But I hope—no, want you to come back. You came here once, and you can surely come here again. I’ll wait here with Grom until you do.

I trust Arceus that he’ll help us see each other again,

Cassia

Lawrence looked up from the letter. ‘You trusted Arceus…that we’d see each other again.’ His paws shook. ‘I…I remember. The Tree of Life. Everyone who dies…returns.’ He let the drawing fall from his paws. ‘I…I can see her again. When I die…she’ll be waiting for me. For me to return.’ Tears brimmed his eyes. “I’ve been thinking about it all wrong. Arceus does love me. He does care.” He stared up adamantly, looking at the stars of Equivos—where he knew he belonged.

His eyes widened as he remembered. He crossed his arms and bowed his head, then squeezing his eyes shut, said, “Thank you, Arceus. Y-You’ve helped me see so much. I love Equivos and what it has brought me.”

He tilted up his head and opened his eyes. “Cassia helped me and so many others see the truth. I’ll miss her for her smile, her company—everything about her.” He came to his feet. “She died trusting you’d do what was right. And through her, you have.”

He raised a paw and thrust it into the sky. “I’ll finish what she started! I won’t forget her, or Grom, or anyone else! I won’t forget what she’s done for me!”

He lowered his paw, then sighed. “And I won’t forget what you’ve done for me.”

The cross of despair and gladness that filled Lawrence’s heart swept away in exchange for peace. A deep, wholesome calm, as if nothing could be wrong in anything. All the sadness, all the pain—vanished.

He fell to his side, exhausted. He immediately fell into a warm, sustaining sleep. One that he had never experienced since Cassia’s fate.

~~~~

Light. Warmth. Wind. Sand. The bright morning light reflected off the smooth grains. Vikavolt burrowed back underground for their next flight, while Vibrava resurfaced, filling the air with light-hearted buzzing. The brisk breeze churned up the sand, coating the fur of the two Lucario on its banks.

Lawrence took a deep breath, opened his eyes, then sat up, stretched, and shook off the sand in his fur. He looked to his left and saw Cassia’s bag, packed with her belongings.

A stab of guilt and sadness struck Lawrence’s core. She was still gone. Just like Grom. No more surprise hugs, no more silent footsteps from either the Zoroark or Golurk. It was just him and a legendary Lucario. Alone.

He shook his head. ‘I’ll see her again…even if she’s not here now.’ The despair fled from the peace that gradually filled his chest.

The Lucario stood up, picked up the bag, then turned around expecting to see Matheus sleeping nearby. He searched for a moment and saw Matheus sitting away from him, his head tilted down.

Lawrence cocked his head and approached the Legend. Upon reaching Matheus, Lawrence noticed Cassia’s letter in his paws.

Matheus gazed at the letter, unmoving. “You’re awake.” He glanced at Lawrence. “Good.” He nodded his head, then continued staring at the letter.

Lawrence looked around momentarily, then cleared his throat. “Don’t you think we should…get going?” Matheus didn’t respond.

Lawrence looked at the other side of Matheus and saw the supply bag, with the casks poking out from the top. “Did you find water last night?”

“Hm?” Matheus perked up from his letter, staring up in space. He shrugged his shoulders, then said, “Yeah, I found it…like always.” He trailed off, muttering.

Lawrence sat down next to Matheus, pulling off Cassia’s bag. “Are you alright?”

Matheus blinked, then slowly turned toward Lawrence. “I could ask the same about you. Why are you suddenly in a good mood?” He grumbled, turning back to the letter.

Lawrence bit his lip, turning away. “I’ve just…come to terms with reality is all.” He sighed. “No use being sad for the rest of my life. I’ll always miss Cassia and Grom, but at least they don’t have to worry about anything anymore.”

Matheus paused. “You’ve…you’ve already come to that?” He cringed, folding the letter down. “More progress than I’ve ever made.”

“E-Excuse me?”

Matheus threw down the letter. “Yes, you’ve done better than this miserable old coot of a Lucario ever did!” He stormed upright. “For most of my life, I’ve thought of nothing but how I failed Equivos! I hid away in the Tree of Life, sorry for myself for creating the most vicious Pokémon Equivos has ever seen—and losing my home and my friends with him! I don’t even know what made him change!” He tore off his hat and smacked against his other paw. “Everyone I know dies! No matter how much I try to protect them! First my Guildmembers, then my village—” He took a deep breath, then lowered his hat. “Then Cael…my brother.”

He knelt on the ground, then held up Cassia’s letter. “She cared so much for you. She believed in you. She knew you’d do what’s right.” He lowered the letter, then his head. “No one’s ever said that about me.” The letter fell from his paws. “I’ve failed you. I could’ve saved her, yet I didn’t. Another mistake made with thousands of others.” He held up his hat, then let it fall to the sand. “I don’t deserve to be a Legend.”

Only the wind passed between them in those long moments. Matheus hung his head, eyes closed, while Lawrence stared at the ground, watching the individual grains of sand shifted with the others.

Lawrence raised his eyes, a small grin coming across his face. “Alright, you, Matheus, have made mistakes. You did things wrong, and I agree with you.” Matheus exhaled, his head dipping closer to the ground.

Lawrence set a paw on Matheus’ shoulder. “But let’s look at what Aleron did.” Matheus opened his eyes.

“Aleron saved hundreds, thousands of Pokémon. He made the Arceist Tome, helping others know the truth!” He shook Matheus slightly. “If it weren’t for you, Aleron, none of that would’ve happened.”

Matheus shrugged him away. “But Arceus could’ve easily chosen someone else."

Lawrence shook his head. “No. He couldn’t have. No one else could’ve trained me like you.” He came to his feet and stood in front of Matheus. “If you weren’t a Legend, then all the Lucario would’ve been dead when Arthus came back.”

“Don’t remind me.”

“But since you were still around, you saved me and Cassia from being captured by Arthus. You trained me to fight like a Lucario. You taught me how to use aura—and how to find it.” Lawrence held up his paws. “Before I came here, I hated Lucario; I thought they were creatures just driven by instinct, learning to fight only to attack others.” He shook his head, lowering his paws. “But now I know they’re more than that. They learn to fight so they protect those they love. They evolve because they love their partners. Everything about them involves loving others.”

He sat next to Matheus once more, wrapping his arms around his knees. “The Pokémon in my world might be wild…but I can never look at them the same. I can see where Arceus was going with his commandment to love Pokémon like humans: they have the same capacity to love as we do.” He turned to Matheus. “And you helped me realize that. I don’t think anyone else could have done that. You deserve to be a Legend.”

Matheus stared at him for moments after. He abruptly held out his paw. Lawrence accepted it, then Matheus quickly embraced him. “Thanks for that.” He shook his paw, then pushed away from Lawrence. He smiled. “Hard to believe you didn’t believe in Arceus.”

Lawrence grinned. “Helps to have a miserable old coot of a Lucario beat it into you.”

Matheus’ eyes widened, then he chuckled. “Yeah…I guess so.” They laughed together for the first time in nearly a week.

Soon after, they continued their journey to the fiery Mount Furnek, with Matheus leading the way with renewed vigor. Lawrence trailed behind, reading the Tome from his Pokédex in preparation

for what lay ahead.

In a matter of hours, they crossed the border into a steaming, boiling environment, complete with hot springs and vents belching out vapor. Salandit skittered across the blackened ground, spitting poison as they went, while Torkoal lounged around the vast baths, soaking in the heat. All the while, Durant screeched across the landscape, hunting down what few berries lay in the heat.

Lawrence panted, Cassia’s bag feeling heavier on his shoulder. “Is it usually this hot around here?”

Matheus nodded, unfazed. “Welcome to the Velcan Wastes, full of mineral-rich hot springs, all warmed by lava chutes just below.” He pointed at one of the steam vents. “Every so often, one of those will go off and blast a Slugma to the surface. The unlucky sap turns to rock on contact, so the nice thing to do is to just toss it back in the vent and hope it lands back in lava.” He noticed Lawrence’s discomfort and sniffed. “It’s just a bit of steam. Be grateful it isn’t all smoky like it was a couple hundred years ago, when the ole volcano blew its top. Had to evacuate Furnek for that.”

“I’m just not used to steam with a fur coat,” Lawrence panted.

Matheus shrugged. “You’ll get used to it.”

They continued on through the steaming wasteland, passing scanty Rawst bushes and beaten trails marked with metal-plated signs. Eventually, they reached the base of the volcano, and sprawling across was a series of interconnected metal frames. Box-like houses stood atop the frames, open-roofed, while stalls of all sorts popped up around the bridges between them.

The Lucario stopped at the platforms, looking up at the single ladder up to the metallic realm. Covered in soot, it appeared to have not been used for years.

Matheus paused for a moment, looking up. He stepped aside and gestured to the ladder. “I can climb up another way and watch from above. If Vignon is still alive, I’d rather not meet him.” He sighed. “But if you need help, just say the word. I expect that the Guild Pokémon shouldn’t be much trouble. I’ll wait up on the tower.”

Lawrence nodded, then climbed up the surprisingly-cool ladder into Furnek. Matheus ran around the structures to a single tower that rose up from the ground. He steadily climbed up the posts embedded in the side to the roof—one of the few in Furnek. He then sat, watching Lawrence pass through the town.

The younger Lucario passed by disheveled Blaziken and Magmar, all shying away from him. Darmanitan stood between the houses, backing away from him, glaring as he progressed to the center. Steadily, the Blaziken and Magmar followed him, daring not speak about him.

He reached the central platform, which held little more than a shaded canopy decorated with small statuettes and dried food. Sitting on an intricate mat in the center was a massive stone statue in the shape of a Darmanitan, cracked and weary with age. The eyes were shut, and the mouth remained slightly open, as if it hoped to open once more.

Lawrence stopped in front of the statue, and the Pokémon behind him stopped as well. The statue’s eyes ground open, a gentle pulse of white light shining from the stone.

“You…” the statue said, its voice echoing from its mouth. “A Lucario…yet not.”

Lawrence looked about him, expecting to see the signature black armbands of the Guild on the Pokémon; none were in sight. He turned to the statue and asked, “Where’s the Guild?”

“All gone. The life of the Velcan Wastes proved too difficult to stand, so they returned to the land from which they came.” One of the statue’s eyes lowered. “Why are you here, Lucario-Yet-Not? How? They all died years ago.”

“I survived,” Lawrence replied. “And I’m here to remind you about Arceus.”

The statue’s eyes lowered. “We know him. We worship him. The Guild forced our trust, but when they left, we knew that Arceus held mercy, even within our desolate home.” He sighed his eyes closing. “Despite this, I don’t hold full faith in his servants. They make promises they cannot keep, even to themselves.” His eyes opened again. “Leave this place. The time of the Lucario has passed. They and their deeds should be forgotten.”

The Fire Pokémon parted, creating a path back to the ladder. Lawrence turned around, noticing their distrustful faces. The Darmanitan in particular considered him warily.

He looked up to the tower, expecting Matheus to be there. He was absent.

Lawrence looked around him. The Furnekian Pokemon all stared at him as if he didn’t belong, staying several feet from him.

He took a deep breath, then turned back to the Darmanitan. “You say you worship Arceus…yet you don’t trust his servants?”

“One in particular,” the Darmanitan replied, his eyes remaining still.

Lawrence slowly paced around him, holding an arm up. “Let’s look at why Arceus gave us prophets. He wanted us to learn how he wanted us to act, but he couldn’t give us his instructions himself, so he called Pokemon to do that for him. And not just any Pokemon—good, loyal Pokemon that he could trust.”

“What about Gregorius, the dark prophet? Or Aleron, the one who abandoned his work?” The statue rumbled at the mention of the latter name.

Lawrence resisted the urge to look at the Tome in his Pokédex, aware of the consequences. “As far as I know, Gregorius wasn’t a real prophet; he might’ve seen the future, but he wanted to tear down Arceus, just like Ar—the Usurper.” Pokemon muttered illegibly around him. Lawrence hoped it was for the better.

He continued and said, “And Aleron…well, he had important work to do. Very important. So much that he couldn’t stay; he got invited to Deitae and was there until he—” Lawrence cut himself short, not wanting to reveal Matheus’ identity, yet not wanting to lie.

The Pokemon stepped closer yet kept a tentative distance. The Darmanitan raised an eye in confusion. “Until he what?”

Lawrence held his breath a moment, then said, “Until…he got permission to leave. I don’t know what happened to him…but know that he wanted to serve everyone as long as he lived.” More whispers permeated through the crowd, and they drew closer. The Darmanitan’s eyes closed, and a gentle rumble emanated from his feet.

Feeling more confident, Lawrence faced the towns-Pokemon and said, “And isn’t that what all the prophets wanted to do? To help others? Look at what they’ve done! They saved lives when the Legends lived among us and guided the kingdoms to peace! And when times grew dark and they left, they came back after Laryon made the Guild, and with them, the Arceist Tome came! We have a whole history of Equivos and Arceus’ teachings—and none of it would have happened without them.” The whispers grew more positive and supportive as he spoke, and the Darmanitan’s neutral expression seemed to brighten.

Lawrence stopped in front of him and knelt. “I might not belong here—in more ways than one. But Arceus had a plan when he created this world; the prophets were a key part of it.” He bowed his head and looked up at him. “Don’t let the actions of one ruin your perception of the rest.” The Darmanitan’s mouth creased into a slight smile.

Astonished gasps erupted from the crowd as they parted for a silver Lucario solemnly stepping forward. Lawrence stood up and walked away from the Darmanitan, eyes wide. The Darmanitan’s eyes were lowered as Matheus stopped in front of him. “You look…familiar.”

Matheus held a paw out toward the statue. “Vignon. It’s me.”

The statue’s eyes widened. “Aleron?” He hovered above the mat in shock, then gently lowered, controlling himself. “You are still living, after all this time?”

Matheus nodded, stepping closer. “Yes Vignon. I am Aleron—a Legend of Arceus.”

Vignon’s eyes closed. “I should have expected as such.” They fluttered open. “I have told many tales of what you did for those here in Furnek, hundreds of years ago. Rescuing Pokémon, gathering food, defeating outlaws. None of those feats are as well-known as evacuating Furnek in its last great eruption.” He sighed. “I am the only one to have lived through that time, when I was a Darumaka.”

“And I helped you find a family.” Matheus stopped in front of him, kneeling. “I told you I’d visit you every month after, helping you. I was unable to keep that commitment, and for that, I am sorry.” Vignon’s eyes remained still. Matheus continued, “But I’ll tell you now: I wanted to come. I wanted to help you. And our priestess wanted to come to you as well.” He set a paw against Vignon’s head. “I made many promises to you, and I regret not being able to fulfill them. You reminded me so much of my nephew, and I am sorry to have disappointed you…like so many others.”

Vignon’s eyes closed, and a tear escaped from one. “You are more than Aleron…Matheus, protector of Laryon.” He shifted, disturbing the mat. “I always hoped to see you once more. And with this other Lucario’s assurances, I understand why you left—and why you are still a true prophet. “The eyes opened, their light dimming. “Thank you.” The light extinguished, and he shrunk in a gentle crackle of stone. He became the same size as the other stones that surrounded him, at peace.

Matheus and Lawrence gazed at each other and nodded. Matheus walked around the altar and joined him, then they passed through the crowds, exiting Furnek with Pokémon sustained in their faith.

They remained silent until Furnek lay out of sight, when Lawrence finally asked, “Why’d you come down? I thought you didn’t want to see Vignon?”

Matheus smiled. “When I saw that they didn’t see the prophets of Arceus in the best light, I knew that I was to blame.” He sighed. “It wouldn’t be right for me to ruin the memories of the other prophets. Plus…” He lowered his head. “I was Vignon’s hero. I needed to show that I was worth looking up to.”

After a moment, Lawrence set a paw on Matheus’ shoulder. He looked up, and Lawrence smiled. “I was hoping for that...Aleron.”

~~~~

At night, after leaving the Furnek Wastes and traveling part of the way through the Iren Desert, Matheus and Lawrence stopped for the night and bedded down for sleep. The cool sand proved relaxing after the heat of the harsh environments, and along with the chitter of Grubbin returning to the surface, they felt relaxed for the first time in what felt like forever.

Matheus dug through the supply bag and pulled out two thin blankets. He tossed one to Lawrence and said, “Should be easy-going until we make it to Saunte. Best sleep for now though.”

The blanket landed next to Lawrence with a soft thump. He sat with his legs up against his chest, looking up at the full moon.

Matheus looked away for a moment, unfolding his blanket. He soon dropped it and shuffled next to Lawrence, sitting down. “You’re thinking about Cassia, aren’t you?”

Lawrence nodded. “She would’ve wanted to see me back in Furnek. Me, of all people, teaching from the Tome.” He smiled, but it soon fell as he lowered his head. “It’s…it’s still hard to believe that she and Grom are gone. I keep waiting for her to just reappear, like she was invisible. Or for Grom to just wander back from somewhere, just…doing what he does.”

They remained silent for a moment, then Lawrence asked, “Matheus…if Arceus really loves everyone, why doesn’t he just save everyone? Why couldn’t he have stopped Grom from destroying himself, or Cassia from dying?”

Matheus raised an eyebrow. “You sound rather…uncertain, which is surprising, considering how you were earlier.”

“I know,” Lawrence groaned. “But I wasn’t thinking about it much then, just…feeling, for lack of a better word. Now that I’ve had time to let it sink in….I just can’t help but wonder.”

Matheus blew out his breath slowly, tapping his paws together. He stopped and said, “I don’t know what to say here—at least, not anything obvious. I guess it was just their time. Arceus has intervened on rare occasions, but that usually happened when someone’s life was in danger because of the actions of another. Grom caused his own death, and Arthus’ and Cassia’s with it.” He rubbed the side of his head, staring out into space. “Although, consider what would have happened had Grom not destroyed himself, or the temple for that matter. Arthus would likely have taken me with the Seal, he would have killed you, Grom would be his servant, and Cassia would have been miserable for the rest of her life.” He shuddered. “And Arthus would have had nothing preventing him from going through with killing Arceus.”

Lawrence blinked, then narrowed his eyes. “That’s…right. If anything, Grom…had to die. And Cassia was just…in the wrong place.”

Matheus grabbed Lawrence arm and said, “Don’t go thinking anything had to happen one way or another; there’s always another way.” He let go and lay on his back, setting his paws on his chest. “Although, given the circumstances…I’m not sure what that way would be.” He turned to Lawrence. “But do you feel a little better about it?”

Lawrence shrugged with a sigh. “Not really. But at least I can understand why more.” He smiled and looked down at Matheus. “At least you’re here, Matheus.” He lay down on his blanket and turned away for sleep.

Matheus remained on the ground for a moment, then sat upright and smiled. “Thanks.” He returned to his blanket and rested with Lawrence to be ready for their return to Saunte.

~~~~

Over the next three days, Lawrence and Matheus crossed the Iren Desert once more, passing around the northern side of the Guild and into the Kaena Woods, where they passed a disturbed patch of soil, but little more of interest.

Lawrence stopped at the fringe of the Kaena Woods, remembering it well. On the other side of the plain, he first met Cassia Gardevoir and Grom Golurk, beginning his journey across the entirety of the Serenita, now over a month ago.

He remembered himself from that time, so concerned about being able to return home. Now he didn’t care, save for being able to see his parents again. That old, faithless self was gone. Now, the Arceist had returned.

Matheus joined him at the fringe, following the sled tracks. He looked over to Saunte and gave it a curious look. “Awful lot of smoke coming out from there.” A giant plume hung over the center of Saunte, gathering above the massive crowd in the plaza.

Lawrence nodded in agreement. “Think it’s safe?”

Matheus turned to Lawrence, hefting the supply bag. “Only one way to find out.”

They began walking down to Saunte, all while Lawrence relived the same trek, thinking only of one thing:

“I wish Cassia was still here.”

 

[Ambyssin]

Matheus' confessional stuff at the beginning was unusual for me. I feel like I might've had a better sense of what was being talked about had I read your other stuff. However, your introductory post said reading the stories before this one wasn't essential, and that you were planning to make a prequel to this down the road. So, with that said, the way Matheus explains everything feels like 'prequel bait.' Reading it, I kept thinking to myself that details were being left out for the sake of not spoiling this prequel you want to write. However, as it stands, to me it ended up coming across as frustratingly vague. The big reason is that Matheus touches on a lot of points that have been brought up before (e.g. Arthus' betrayal, how it coincided with Matheus doing these trials, the original Cassia's death, etc.). But you never gave us explicit details about these things. I may know that something happened to make Arthus totally snap, but I have no idea what it actually is. What were the exact circumstances that led to his wife's death? What were things actually like when Matheus got back from these trials of his? And what sequence of events led to Matheus attempting a heroic sacrifice and Arthus ending up imprisoned with Yveltal?

I expected his confession to give me the specifics, but instead he was just as vague about these things as the story's been the other times this has gotten brought up. I can understand if you wanted to hold that stuff back so you could write (or re-write?) the prequel story, but I think you went a bit overboard. And since you advertised that this could be read as a standalone story, that's how I approached it. A lot of the stuff is integral to the world's backstory and understanding some of the main characters. So the fact that it's constantly presented like, "As you know, Arthus went crazy and did some evil stuff," baffles me a bit. It's possible I'm missing something, but there may be others who read this first and are equally as confused. So, I'm throwing it all out there.

I enjoyed the next part, even looking past the fact that Lawrence was rifling through a "dead" lady's bag and, being human, he should know better. Folks would find that kind of behavior a right bit creepy, after all. From the looks of things, I like the interpretation of the Tree of Life as either some sort of afterlife for Pokémon or as a gateway to it (or maybe some combination). I think it adds a unique spiritual element to the Xerneas mythos. It also opens up a whole lot of questions about reincarnation that I'm going to stay away from. The note that Lawrence finds from Cassia is very cute and felt appropriate heart-breaking. Of course, the cynic in me says that you're really laying it on thick with the "Cassia's gone" stuff and the fact that it's just been continuously reinforced is actually evidence that she's alive and kicking. Matheus keeps talking about Arthus like the guy's still around, to boot.

That cynic also thinks that one could easily interpret Lawrence's thoughts about Cassia and her faith in Arceus in a far darker light. You do hammer it home very clearly that Cassia was selfless and pure... and was able to find happiness because of it. But there is a bit of an elephant in the room for me. One could look at this story and say, "Yeah, Cassia was faithful to Arceus. And her trust was rewarded with a premature death that was indirectly caused by her crazy adopted father and her best friend." Technically speaking, the last moments of her life were filled with extraordinary strife and heartbreak, not happiness. I think your answer to that is the Tree of Life. As an afterlife, she's being reunited with Grom and possibly others she cared about and no longer has to worry? And, I think, Lawrence becomes convinced that, if he just left w/ no Arthus confrontation, Arceus would have found a way for them to come together anyway?

I'm rambling at this point. I guess I should say that, I liked the touching scene because it was somber and reflective, but I'm cynical enough to wonder how Lawrence – who you've shown to be analytical, and often times quite the cynic himself – is able to come to the conclusion that Arceus cares for him. I suppose, then, that you could benefit from having Lawrence try wrestling with those cynical thoughts. It'd make for a good moral quandry and further his character development. Of course, it's up to you whether you do that or not. Forgive my crazy talk.

 

[lucarioknight56]

Matheus' confessional stuff at the beginning was unusual for me. I feel like I might've had a better sense of what was being talked about had I read your other stuff. However, your introductory post said reading the stories before this one wasn't essential, and that you were planning to make a prequel to this down the road. So, with that said, the way Matheus explains everything feels like 'prequel bait.' Reading it, I kept thinking to myself that details were being left out for the sake of not spoiling this prequel you want to write. However, as it stands, to me it ended up coming across as frustratingly vague. The big reason is that Matheus touches on a lot of points that have been brought up before (e.g. Arthus' betrayal, how it coincided with Matheus doing these trials, the original Cassia's death, etc.). But you never gave us explicit details about these things. I may know that something happened to make Arthus totally snap, but I have no idea what it actually is. What were the exact circumstances that led to his wife's death? What were things actually like when Matheus got back from these trials of his? And what sequence of events led to Matheus attempting a heroic sacrifice and Arthus ending up imprisoned with Yveltal?

I expected his confession to give me the specifics, but instead he was just as vague about these things as the story's been the other times this has gotten brought up. I can understand if you wanted to hold that stuff back so you could write (or re-write?) the prequel story, but I think you went a bit overboard. And since you advertised that this could be read as a standalone story, that's how I approached it. A lot of the stuff is integral to the world's backstory and understanding some of the main characters. So the fact that it's constantly presented like, "As you know, Arthus went crazy and did some evil stuff," baffles me a bit. It's possible I'm missing something, but there may be others who read this first and are equally as confused. So, I'm throwing it all out there.

I've been meaning to talk about my plans for the prequel, PMD: Legends Awakened, for a while now, so I may as well discuss them here. Big thing to keep in mind here: while Matheus may remember the trials and Arthus' betrayal, he really doesn't know the path that lead to it. The trials took months out of his life, and in that time, all he knows is that this Gengar named Gregorius put Arthus up to using the Seal of Creation and for some reason lead to Arthus killing his wife--which has been mentioned by Cassia and Matheus in his presence. Matheus is a poor Pokemon to be asking this, as only Arthus really knows the events leading up to their falling out.

As for after the betrayal, such as Matheus' sacrifice and Arthus' imprisonment...they are intrinsically related to each other. I will tell you right now that Matheus was dead by the time Arthus was defeated by Laryon, and it wasn't until later that he found out what happened. Only Matheus or Arthus could accurately describe what happened, as they are the only ones to remember the event outside the legend, and considering that Arthus has so far been completely unwilling to talk about his past, Matheus is the best option. One thing: there hasn't been a good opportunity for him to discuss that.

I know, I know, this scene might be a good time for it, but is this really the time for Matheus to enter exposition mode? I really wouldn't mind telling you how the clash went out--but to be honest, I'd rather have it be explained in Legends Awakened. I don't know how I can explain enough to flesh out Matheus while also being mysterious enough to create a future compelling story. Any thoughts?

P.S. Many of the events referenced throughout the story actually didn't happen in the original story, PMD: Legends Unraveled. The only thing really is Matheus' confrontation with Arthus, and that has changed severely. I wouldn't recommend reading it if you wanted a better understanding of Matheus. Plus, his personality then was a whole lot more different, and there were actual Mystery Dungeons written for...yeah, they didn't turn out too well.

I enjoyed the next part, even looking past the fact that Lawrence was rifling through a "dead" lady's bag and, being human, he should know better. Folks would find that kind of behavior a right bit creepy, after all.

Well...to be honest, what else would you do with her belongings?

I'm rambling at this point. I guess I should say that, I liked the touching scene because it was somber and reflective, but I'm cynical enough to wonder how Lawrence – who you've shown to be analytical, and often times quite the cynic himself – is able to come to the conclusion that Arceus cares for him. I suppose, then, that you could benefit from having Lawrence try wrestling with those cynical thoughts. It'd make for a good moral quandary and further his character development. Of course, it's up to you whether you do that or not. Forgive my crazy talk.

I assume that there's few issues outside of that? I guess I could have him second-guessing himself in this chapter, but come to that conclusion anyway.


Alright, with all that done, here's the plan for Legends Awakened. I plan on spending June planning out the story and working on some original stories. After that, there will be weekly updates, just like what I'm doing here. I won't put up an end date, though, as that ended up ruining some of the intensity of this story.

There will be two parts to Legends Awakened that lead right into each other. The first part will focus on Arthus and Matheus and how they created the Guild--and how it became corrupted. I plan on featuring Arthus mostly in this half, as he had the most development as a character here.

The second half will be the true rewrite of Legends Unraveled, focusing primarily on Matheus and Laryon's relationship with each other. There will also be a story focusing on Arthus and his son, Erik, interacting with Azure--Matheus' sister and Laryon's aunt--and Ferrick--Arthus' brother. The two stories will be more closely related with each other than in Legends Unraveled, and will hopefully contain better character development all around. Either way, it will be a better quality story than before.

 

[Ambyssin]

The trials took months out of his life, and in that time, all he knows is that this Gengar named Gregorius put Arthus up to using the Seal of Creation and for some reason lead to Arthus killing his wife--which has been mentioned by Cassia and Matheus in his presence. Matheus is a poor Pokemon to be asking this, as only Arthus really knows the events leading up to their falling out.

Then you really need to address that. You need to make it clear A) that Matheus really has no idea and Arthus' continued evil rampage is a shock to him, B) why no one else (not even Arceus or another Legendary) knows what went wrong, and/or C) why anyone who might know a bit more than Matheus never bothered to loop him in. If you explained these, I would find it more believable that Matheus considers himself a failure and a coward. The confession scene would read better to me, in that case.

As for after the betrayal, such as Matheus' sacrifice and Arthus' imprisonment...they are intrinsically related to each other. I will tell you right now that Matheus was dead by the time Arthus was defeated by Laryon, and it wasn't until later that he found out what happened.

But if someone did tell him about how Arthus was defeated, wouldn't it have made sense for him to tell Cassia, at the very least?

I really wouldn't mind telling you how the clash went out--but to be honest, I'd rather have it be explained in Legends Awakened. I don't know how I can explain enough to flesh out Matheus while also being mysterious enough to create a future compelling story. Any thoughts?

Well, you put yourself in a very rough spot by choosing to write this story first instead of Legends Awakened, because the events of the latter are integral to the events of the former. It's one thing to come out with a prequel to what seems like a standalone story (e.g. Monster's University for Monster's Inc.). But you're writing a story that's being held up by events that you are going to tell us in a sequel... that's actually a prequel. I realize this won't be a problem for anyone who reads this farther in the future. But for now, you might want to address it.

You can give some details of the past without spoiling Legends Awakened. I imagine it's going to be a very long story. For example, in explaining what happened to Arthus, you could at least throw in a sentence or two that says "Gregorius showed Arthus that, despite his best efforts, the world was still full of sin and suffering. He managed to talk it into Arthus that the lone way to find true happiness would be to restore the Seal." That at least would give me enough details to get a relative understanding of what happened, while still allowing you to write all of the details in Legends Awakened. So, in my example, what Gregorious specifically said to Arthus and how it started to warp his thinking.

I assume that there's few issues outside of that? I guess I could have him second-guessing himself in this chapter, but come to that conclusion anyway.

That was pretty much it. I need to address them because they felt glaring for me. And if I thought they stuck out, someone else is bound to pounce on those parts. If not here, then on another site.

 

[lucarioknight56]

Then you really need to address that. You need to make it clear A) that Matheus really has no idea and Arthus' continued evil rampage is a shock to him, B) why no one else (not even Arceus or another Legendary) knows what went wrong, and/or C) why anyone who might know a bit more than Matheus never bothered to loop him in. If you explained these, I would find it more believable that Matheus considers himself a failure and a coward. The confession scene would read better to me, in that case.

Parts of this may work well in Chapter 19, actually. I could loop all of them together in his outburst, and it would still read fine.

But if someone did tell him about how Arthus was defeated, wouldn't it have made sense for him to tell Cassia, at the very least?

Yes, it would. The second place this would work well would be in Bonus Chapter 2, when Cassia is asking how Arthus came to be so evil. Plus, she is sure to be curious on how Arthus came to be imprisoned anyway.

Well, you put yourself in a very rough spot by choosing to write this story first instead of Legends Awakened, because the events of the latter are integral to the events of the former. It's one thing to come out with a prequel to what seems like a standalone story (e.g. Monster's University for Monster's Inc.). But you're writing a story that's being held up by events that you are going to tell us in a sequel... that's actually a prequel. I realize this won't be a problem for anyone who reads this farther in the future. But for now, you might want to address it.

You can give some details of the past without spoiling Legends Awakened. I imagine it's going to be a very long story. For example, in explaining what happened to Arthus, you could at least throw in a sentence or two that says "Gregorius showed Arthus that, despite his best efforts, the world was still full of sin and suffering. He managed to talk it into Arthus that the lone way to find true happiness would be to restore the Seal." That at least would give me enough details to get a relative understanding of what happened, while still allowing you to write all of the details in Legends Awakened. So, in my example, what Gregorious specifically said to Arthus and how it started to warp his thinking.

I'm planning on Legends Awakened being a little over two-thirds of the length of Unequivocant, just so you know. As for those details, yeah, it could work. It seems that the two principle areas would be the outburst in 19 and the first meeting with Matheus in Bonus Chapter 2. I was planning on more revisions after a lengthy review from Serebii, so it wouldn't interrupt much.

I'll be finishing Chapter 20 today, then I'll be focusing on the planned revisions. That large review actually touched on points you brought up in your initial review for Act 1. I guess I didn't entirely resolve the issues present, so its good to have them be brought up again.

 

[lucarioknight56]

Alright, I'll be posting the list of changes for each chapter in this post so you readers can refer to them in case you want to reread. They'll be up by tomorrow morning, so keep an eye out for them.

Spoiler: Chapter Changes

Chapter 02: Overhaul of description in introduction and Lawrence's emotional responses in Facility D.

Chapter 04: Removal of Lawrence's worry of following Arceus if he helps the Pokemon of Equivos.

Chapter 05: Same as Chapter 04, along with removing the details of the deaths of the Guild Pokemon.

Chapter 06: Removal of Lawrence hearing screams in Unova compared tot he death of the mother Lopunny.

Chapter 07: Removal of Gardner absorbing the souls of those who died in Barash when none died.

Chapter 09: Odd phrasing adjusted.

Special Chapter 1: Tense changes and vocab adjustment.

Special Chapter 2: Major details added, mostly with Matheus describing his past with Arthus. This includes his account of Arthus' betrayal and a description of the Trials of Deitae, along with his description of their fight together. Cassia now offers to return the piece of his head to Grom, only to have it be denied as a form of trust. She also receives her mask from Matheus, learning that it used to belong to Ferrick Zoroark, Arthus' brother.

Special Chapter 3: Cassia no longer receives the mask from the Weaviles, instead receiving it from Matheus in Bonus Chapter 2.

Chapter 10: Change of transition with Cassia and Matheus talking about Arianne; it used to revolve around the mask.

Chapter 11: Arthus now learns of Cassia and Lawrence's route by means of a Murkrow spy, killing it in his rage afterwards.

Chapter 19: Matheus dwells more on how he never knew how Arthus changed in the past, and feels guilty for it despite knowing it was all Arthus' own fault.

The changes for Chapters 2~7 are mostly remnants of changes suggested in a previous review that were brought up again on another site. Chapter 11's changes were mostly because readers were confused on why Arthus didn't attack Cassia and Lawrence then and there, instead choosing to execute an elaborate plan that ultimately wouldn't work entirely. Of all the chapters, Bonus Chapter 2 has received the most additions to bolster Matheus' backstory--Chapter 19 didn't prove suitable for detailed descriptions--and Cassia offering the part of Grom's head was suggested to keep Cassia and Grom's relationship entirely honest with each other. The mask is also given by Matheus here, as Arianne originally having it did not make the most sense in the context of a Zoroark's physiology compared to a Gallade or Gardevoir.

As said, these will be posted by tomorrow. I hope these changes will be welcome.

EDIT: The changes for all chapters except Bonus Chapter 2 have been posted. I aim to have them posted in the morning, but I can't guarantee that.