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Rate the User Above's Joke
- Thread starter Pidgeot
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DracoMan
NCIS Special Agent
- Joined
- Oct 19, 2008
- Messages
- 3,591
- Reaction score
- 134
2/10 Pales in comparison to the Chuck Norris joke from earlier.
Thank you for calling the psychiatric hotline.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Please wait while we trace the call.
If you are schizophrenic, listen closely and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
Thank you for calling the psychiatric hotline.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Please wait while we trace the call.
If you are schizophrenic, listen closely and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
IslandWalker
Member
- Joined
- Sep 6, 2009
- Messages
- 2,836
- Reaction score
- 3
7/10
Why did the chicken cross the road on September 16th?
Why did the chicken cross the road on September 16th?
To get more Black and White info.
Shiny Staraptor
needs a new avatar
- Joined
- Aug 10, 2010
- Messages
- 1,103
- Reaction score
- 4
1/10 too old.
There was a guy whose life was so wierd, he thought he was nuts.
He took a walk through the park saying "nuts...nuts..."
Then a squirrel says "nuts?" buddy, you are insane!
There was a guy whose life was so wierd, he thought he was nuts.
He took a walk through the park saying "nuts...nuts..."
Then a squirrel says "nuts?" buddy, you are insane!
AlexandraTheZoroark
HAS RETURNEEEEDDD!!!!
- Joined
- Sep 9, 2010
- Messages
- 1,399
- Reaction score
- 0
2/10 Didn't laugh much :/
Principal: I heard you skipped school to go to the movies.
Student: Of course I skipped school to go move E's.
Principal: Why do you "move" E's?
Student So you are asking "Wha lie too moo I've eeeeeee's?"
Principal: What?
Student: I know you are saying "Whater?"
Pincipal: I give up!
Student: You just said "Hi live up!"
I made that one up. That sometimes happenes in schools when kids trick the adults by spoofing what the adult said :XD2:
Principal: I heard you skipped school to go to the movies.
Student: Of course I skipped school to go move E's.
Principal: Why do you "move" E's?
Student So you are asking "Wha lie too moo I've eeeeeee's?"
Principal: What?
Student: I know you are saying "Whater?"
Pincipal: I give up!
Student: You just said "Hi live up!"
I made that one up. That sometimes happenes in schools when kids trick the adults by spoofing what the adult said :XD2:
5/10. not that funny:/
CAVE_MAN TIME:
Olly: Hi
Ed: Ooga OOga
Ollly: What you like?
Ed: Me like whores
Olly: me like horse, too!
Ed: Me like rubbing whores
Olly:Me like petting horse
Ed:Me like touching whores
Olly:Me like sitting on horse
Ed: Me like to bang whores
Olly:Meanie
Olly:I like to ride whores
Edervert
Ed:Me like to kiss whores
Olly: stupid asshole
Olly:me like to sleep on horse
Ed: pedophile
Ed:
Olly:<:/
Ed: SHUT UP PSYCHO BITCH MINE!!!
Olly; YOU go New Jersey on me, NO NO!
Ed: >:O
Olly:>:O
ED:-_-
Olly:-_-
*engage in huge, heated argument that went over 9000, so your computer fails to upload*
CAVE_MAN TIME:
Olly: Hi
Ed: Ooga OOga
Ollly: What you like?
Ed: Me like whores
Olly: me like horse, too!
Ed: Me like rubbing whores
Olly:Me like petting horse
Ed:Me like touching whores
Olly:Me like sitting on horse
Ed: Me like to bang whores
Olly:Meanie
Olly:I like to ride whores
Ed
ervertEd:Me like to kiss whores
Olly: stupid asshole
Olly:me like to sleep on horse
Ed: pedophile
Ed:
Olly:<:/
Ed: SHUT UP PSYCHO BITCH MINE!!!
Olly; YOU go New Jersey on me, NO NO!
Ed: >:O
Olly:>:O
ED:-_-
Olly:-_-
*engage in huge, heated argument that went over 9000, so your computer fails to upload*
CharizardDude
Rock Chalk Jayhawk
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2009
- Messages
- 84
- Reaction score
- 0
7/10
Yo momma is so, fat the king of Spain paid Columbus to find his way around her.
Yo momma is so, fat the king of Spain paid Columbus to find his way around her.
EspeonUsedDazzlingGleam
Registered Music Geek
- Joined
- Jul 12, 2010
- Messages
- 270
- Reaction score
- 2
8/10. Love that joke.
Three men died and went to heaven. When they walked up to the pearly gates, they saw that 8-O everyone in heaven had a car! Sweet. So they went to talk to St. Peter so he could let them in.
"Okay, I'm letting you all into heaven, and as you can see, you all are going to get cars," Peter said. "However, the kind of car that you get depends on how faithful each one of you was to your wives. Each of you have to be honest or you're not getting into heaven at all."
The first man said, "St. Peter, I must admit that I cheated on my wife twice." So the man was given a Ford Pinto. Ouch.
The second man said, "St. Peter, I must admit that I also cheated on my wife, but only once." So he was given a Chevrolet Cobalt. Not bad.
The third man said, "St. Peter, the entire time I was married to my darling wife, I never gave in to the temptations of adultery; I never cheated on her even once." So this virtuous man was given a Lambourghini. Very nice.
And with that, all three men were sent on their ways.
About a week later, the three men were driving down the same street together and they were all stopped at the same red light. The first two men looked over and saw that...The man in the Lambo was crying?? How strange!
So when he gets the opportunity, the first man calls the third man. "Hey, I saw you driving earlier today and you looked really upset about something. What happened?" he questioned.
The third man sniveled and wiped some tears from his eyes. Then he replied, "When I was driving, my wife rode past me; she was on a skateboard! :-("
Three men died and went to heaven. When they walked up to the pearly gates, they saw that 8-O everyone in heaven had a car! Sweet. So they went to talk to St. Peter so he could let them in.
"Okay, I'm letting you all into heaven, and as you can see, you all are going to get cars," Peter said. "However, the kind of car that you get depends on how faithful each one of you was to your wives. Each of you have to be honest or you're not getting into heaven at all."
The first man said, "St. Peter, I must admit that I cheated on my wife twice." So the man was given a Ford Pinto. Ouch.
The second man said, "St. Peter, I must admit that I also cheated on my wife, but only once." So he was given a Chevrolet Cobalt. Not bad.
The third man said, "St. Peter, the entire time I was married to my darling wife, I never gave in to the temptations of adultery; I never cheated on her even once." So this virtuous man was given a Lambourghini. Very nice.
And with that, all three men were sent on their ways.
About a week later, the three men were driving down the same street together and they were all stopped at the same red light. The first two men looked over and saw that...The man in the Lambo was crying?? How strange!
So when he gets the opportunity, the first man calls the third man. "Hey, I saw you driving earlier today and you looked really upset about something. What happened?" he questioned.
The third man sniveled and wiped some tears from his eyes. Then he replied, "When I was driving, my wife rode past me; she was on a skateboard! :-("
The Magneton
New Member
- Joined
- Aug 3, 2010
- Messages
- 371
- Reaction score
- 0
7/10 for unexplainable reasons.
An Irish family have been found frozen to death outside the Odeon Cinema in Dublin. They had been queueing for three weeks to see "Closed For The Winter"!
Aaaaannnnddd....
My history teacher said that I should pay more attention in class.
That's what he or she said!
An Irish family have been found frozen to death outside the Odeon Cinema in Dublin. They had been queueing for three weeks to see "Closed For The Winter"!
Aaaaannnnddd....
My history teacher said that I should pay more attention in class.
That's what he or she said!
- Thread starter
- #52
Joke 1: 10/10 I bet a stupid guy actually did that.
Joke 2: 7/10 Short and sweet. But not as good as the first joke.
An Irishman met an Englishmen on the street. The English man asked the Irish man, "Why are you carrying a tv with you?" The Irish man replied, "I took itwith me in case I got bored on the way here, so that I could watch something."
Joke 2: 7/10 Short and sweet. But not as good as the first joke.
An Irishman met an Englishmen on the street. The English man asked the Irish man, "Why are you carrying a tv with you?" The Irish man replied, "I took itwith me in case I got bored on the way here, so that I could watch something."
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