Son of Steel : Hard as a Rock

As Dark as White can be..
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This is my first writing of any kind. I just came up with the idea in the shower, funny how that happens isn't it? But anyway. If I get enough feedback I might continue on with this. Develop into a story of sorts. Thanks in advance.



"This can't be it... I... I can't die now..." The boy was breathing heavily, but he continued to sprint at his maximum
through the increasingly dense forest. Trees flew fast his face, four or five at a single time. The boy had been running
for 5 minutes non-stop. He sneaked a backwards glance, trying to determine how close the monster was. He couldn't
see it, and more worryingly he couldn't here it either. He turned to face forwards, and screamed as a fully grown Tyranitar
towered over him.
"I.. I-" His whimperings were cut short, the Tyranitar thrust out it's right claws and clutched the boy's head between them.
The boy knew this was it. To this Tyranitar, he was nothing. His head would crushed as easily as the boy would crush grapes
before throwing them at his cousin Roxanne. Typical, here he was, being held 4 feet off of the ground by a mass killing
monster, and he was thinking about his distant cousin he'd only met once? She lived far away so that is understandable-
"GYOOOOOOH"
Roark's thoughts were cut short by the Tyranitar's hideous scream. He fell to the floor, but quickly pulled himself from the
ground to see what had caused him to be dropped so suddenly. He looked up at the Tyranitar, to see a menacing looking
gash on the Pokemon's right shoulder.
"But how...?"
"Hey KID, get AWAY from there! Hitmonchan, another Vacuum WAVE!"
Now Roark was confused, what was a half naked man doing in the middle of the forest?! And more importantly why was he
helping him?! He watched in awe as the fighting Pokemon jumped high into the air, while spinning it's arms vigourously.

*CRACK*

The sound of the vacuum created colliding with the Tyranitar's armour was almost deafening. He watched as the Tyranitar
cried out in pain, as the armour was literally ripped from the collosal Pokemon's body.
"KID! You still HERE?! Get OUT of here!"
"B...B... But what about y-you...?"
"Do I LOOK like I need help? GO!"

Roark didn't need to be told a third time, he'd offered his help like his father would've. And now he was running back to that
same father, in Canalave City.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Roark had gotten in late last night, he'd sneaked into his room and fell instantly asleep, exhausted from the days events.
But as his custom Kabuto alarm woke him at 7:20, he couldn't help but feel something was different. There was something
different about the genreal "feel" of the house. He dragged himself out of bed, still fully clothed.
"Ahhh my head!" he mumbled to himself, as he limped to the bathroom to shower. After cleaning the mix of blood and mud
off of his face, Roark put on a new set of clothes. Identical to the set he wore yesterday. A black vest top with grey bottoms
with a grey jacket to match.
"Where're my glasses? Oh dear." He pulled his hand out his washing pile, holding onto a crumpled lengh of wire and some
fragments of glass.
"It's good I always come prepared!" He exclaimed as he grabbed a pair of glasses from the draw in his bed side table.
"Now! To breakfaaargh" Roark stared out of the window. The half naked man was in his garden, punching rocks with his
bare hands.
"What is going on here?! First a psycho Tyranitar in the woods! Now a half naked man self harming in my garden! And to
top it all off, his father said he'd give him a gift today! And a gift from Byron of Canalave isn't what you'd think, he gave a
stick of dynamite to Roark for his last birthday. Shouting "IT'LL MAKE YOU AS TOUGH AS YOUR FATHER! EATING THAT!"
"He eats dynamite..." Shuddered Roark, today was going to be very interesting indeed.
 
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is obsessed with Noivern!
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Just one comment for now (and a trivial one at that):

"Hey KID, get AWAY from THERE! Hitmonchan, another Vacuum WAVE!"
You're emphasizing some of the wrong words. For example, "THERE". Do people normally stress the "there" when they say "Get away from there"?
 
As Dark as White can be..
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Thats what I was going for! I always saw Bruno as a guy who didn't really get out much, and shouted a lot. And I had an idea relating him and Byron. So the shouting comes in there too.
 
is obsessed with Noivern!
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Thats what I was going for! I always saw Bruno as a guy who didn't really get out much, and shouted a lot. And I had an idea relating him and Byron. So the shouting comes in there too.
Well, no, I wouldn't have a problem with this:

"Hey KID, get AWAY from there! Hitmonchan, another VACUUM WAVE!"
This would have been more acceptable.
 
As Dark as White can be..
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Yes, now I look at it you're right!

Fixed it, thanks Zekurom
 
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