Stand Up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Or fall down! (Jokes)!

[The Medicine Cat "猫"]

:idea:Simply you are to present a joke (stand up comedy get it, ha, ha:XD2 then the next user will rate and comment on it as such:

User 1: Do you know why the Torchic crossed the road....So it wouldn't cross Route 110 and get Swalot "ed" up

2/10 : I have herd better.:/

: My Joke is...etc.....

You may use any jokes, they don't have to be about pokemon.

Rules:
-Do respect others
-Keep it some what clean, or Moderators will take out the trash.
-No Race jokes please, unless it racing jokes as in vroom vroom.
-Use that thing in your head, no not your lunch box, your brain, don't do stuff that may hurt someone.
-No spam, we don't like that type of meat!
-Use your every day rules of Bulbagarden, it's nothing new, all it does is keep the awesome atmosphere we all like here at Bulbagarden, thank you.
-Keep your feedback nice and okay, were not here to hurt peoples feelings, this is a fun atmosphere.
-Don't joke about are Cool Cat Rayne, it's just a rule!

Okay dokay... I will start off :Why don't Jynxes get dates very often?
Because they are said to be as cold as ice. (This is a old one.)

 

[DracoMan]

Get off the stage!

You might be a redneck if...a tornado hits your neighborhood and does a hundred thousand dollars worth of improvements.

 

[The Medicine Cat "猫"]

6/10 it was funny.

I am not good at jokes so here go's nothing............




Medicine Cat walks away....

 

[Cap'n Jack]

I dun get it. :S

"You know you're getting old when ... Halley's Comet flies by and you go 'there it goes again...'"

~ Phyllis Diller

 

[Ferbgor]

4/10. I'm sorry but that was flap.

What do a strawberry and a rabbit have in common?

Spoiler

They are both red except for the rabbit.

 

[The Medicine Cat "猫"]

5/5 Good,

Before I criticize a man, I walk a mile in his shoes. That way, if he gets angry, he's a mile away and barefoot.

 

[DracoMan]

6/10 Not bad.

Sophisticated people go to restaurants that require reservations. Rednecks go to restaurants that require us to drive around to the second window, please. "Hey, could you super-size them fries for the little woman? It's our anniversary."

 

[The Medicine Cat "猫"]

7/10 good! - Draco Man you really like redneck jokes don't you? I have feeling you will be the king of this thread!

Okay not my joke but - "Marry an outdoors woman. Then if you throw her out into the yard on a cold night, she can still survive." -W. C. Fields

PS. W. C. Fields was a crude, rude but funny man!

 

[DracoMan]

4/10 Not his best joke.

I believe...that there should be an application process for anyone who wants to wear a thong.

 

[Kessel]

0/10

Classmate's Name: Harry Dick

 

[Chalkwriter]

2/10

Person 1: There's this new Japanese region full of Pokémon that I want to go to. It's called... uh...
Person 2: Isshu?
Person 1: Bless you.
Person 2: No, Isshu. Unova.
Person 1: No, I don't know a person called Va.

Poor, isn't it?

 

[DracoMan]

Am I the only one here who knows what "funny" is? Sit down, amateurs. Here's one of Ryan Stiles' hoedown verses from the Who's Line Is It Anyway? blooper reel:

Singing a song about a vending machine
Don't you know that it's really not my scene?
Trying to think of something clever with a little twist
If we do another hoedown, I'll slit my [BLEEP]ing wrist.

 

[The Medicine Cat "猫"]

??..2/10 didn't feel the punch line.

I know this is a little silly but good ole patty's day is upon us now and my good ole Irish side said to light us up green with a good ole joke!~
:shy:

Spoiler

Q. Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun?

A. Because they're always a little short!~.

 

[Almonds]

7/10

I heard this from somewhere

Knock knock
Who's there?
Justin
Justin who?

Justin time for dinner

 

[The Medicine Cat "猫"]

8/10 I like it, good hold classic knock knock jokes!

Here a stupid one~ :What do you get if you put a parrot into a washing machine?

Spoiler

---

-A poliwhirl !

 

[DracoMan]

*throws tomato*

The Dalai Lama walks into a pizza place and says, "Make me one with everything."

 

[Chalkwriter]

5/10 Alright, but not brilliant, and I would be careful as certain groups of people might not like the religious jokes.



A Pokémon walks into a bar. The barman says "Why are your arms sticking up like that?" and the Pokémon says "I've got Green Mankey fever".

Then a Shiny Mankey walks into the bar.



Notice the links in the joke.

 

[DracoMan]

2/10 The links didn't help.

Wally was a chemist
A chemist he is no more
For what he thought was H2O
Was H2SO4.