The awesome useless superpower game

[pokefan548]

Imagine if you could move any object... one atom at a time.
Imagine if you could woo anyone... of the gender you're not attracted to.
Imagine if you could fly... 1/16th of a milimeter off the ground.

This game is basically a mix of "What superpower would you want" mixed with "Corrupt a wish". Try to compete to see who can make the most over-the-top power completely useless in the most creative ways.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

Alright, I'm game:

The ability to run at the speed of sound, but you can't change directions and splat against anything and everything in your path. Brick wall are, quite literally, your brick wall.

 

[pokefan548]

You're completely invulnerable... to nonlethal attacks.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

You have telekenisis, but you can only move objects that are 1 kilogram or smaller.

 

[ReturnofMCH]

I got this one from IGN
you have the best ventriloquism in the world... only for your super smart dog to learn it too.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

From Homestar Runner:
You can transform into exactly half of whoever you want to...and it always makes the noise "Dwayne" when you transform.

 

[dig]

Ability to generate unlimited sachets of moist salt in your pockets.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

Heat vision, but you only have a range of 1cm

 

[italicizewafer]

Ability to turn invisible...to insects.

 

[Berrenta]

Ability to fly... one second and less than a few inches off the ground.

 

[italicizewafer]

Ability to regenerate, but only on Mondays

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

Hypersonic hearing, but only when someone is running their nails over a chalk board.

 

[italicizewafer]

Ability to fly, but only after going through airport security

 

[----]

Able to walk through walls... when the door is already open

 

[pokefan548]

Supersonic voice... when no one is close enough to hear it.

 

[italicizewafer]

Ability to shapeshift...into a guinea pig

 

[dig]

Ability to fly upward whilst sneezing

 

[italicizewafer]

Ability to grant wishes, but have them be corrupted.

 

[dig]

Ability to carry any object, no matter how cumbersome, whilst reciting passages from Mein Kampf loudly in public.

 

[pokefan548]

The ability to travel through time... at the same rate you've always been traveling.