The awesome useless superpower game

[Maniacal Engineer]

The ability to conjure up plungers, but only when you really don't need them.

 

[italicizewafer]

The ability to ignore Puns, but only Punster Joey's puns.

 

[Wispy Willow]

The ability to make 100% badass lines whenever you want... at funerals.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

The ability to attact any ion that has the opposite charge of yourself...

 

[italicizewafer]

The ability to use attract on genderless pokemons

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

The ability to combine Sodium, and Chloride, both of which are poisonous in their natural states, into something edible and nontoxic.

 

[italicizewafer]

The ability to thwart Punster.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

The ability to thwart Punster.

If someone actually had that power it would not be useless, but since nobody does...here, have a Dalek. It's only fitting, since you unleashed them into the forum.

Anyway the ability to figure out somebody's plans, after they've already completed it.

 

[italicizewafer]

The ability to be Punster. And not be able to cause chaos...at all.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

Superhearing, without being able to focus it or turn it off. All you literally hear is a cacophony of noise every moment of every day.

 

[Wispy Willow]

The ability to shapeshift, but having no control on when it happens. Can get one into some pretty bad situations.

 

[Doctor Floptopus]

The ability to breathe fire... but not to withstand it.

 

[pokefan548]

The ability to run at Mach 5... without being able to slow down.

 

[italicizewafer]

The ability to survive in space, but not to move or eat there.

 

[Wispy Willow]

The ability to distort space. As in empty space.

 

[italicizewafer]

The ability to fly, but only when you are in a plane. Like you can fly. Around the plane.

 

[Maniacal Engineer]

The ability to destroy a planet...when of your adversaries can use the Force.

 

[jackatlasred]

The ability to be immune to poison... but only one kind, in africa.

 

[italicizewafer]

The ability to fart fire, but only by eating large quantities of beans and holding a lighter to the methane

 

[Wispy Willow]

The ability to swap bodies with other living beings via contact. This is both bad and good at the same time, so I don't think I need to say anything more.