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TEEN: The Journey to Mend Broken Things

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Lacunosa Town, a simple place with simple values, not many people live there and trainers typically don't spend much time in the town. This story is about a boy named Arti who isn't really happy with his current life. However, this all changes when he meets a legendary Pokemon who has been greatly weakened.

Alright, I'm going to say here and now this story will have only minor themes of abuse, nothing more than just an argument and hurt feelings. There will also be some wounds involved, but no blood. There will not be any strong language or swears whatsoever. Romance will be involved, but nothing intense. I set the rating to TEEN just to be on the safe side, but if you want me to change the rating to something more suitable, I can do it. Also, my chapters might not be at the typical length as chapters of other fanfictions you find.
 
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Looking for a way to be whole again.
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Chapter 1: The Beginnings of a Sacred Bond
In the simple place called Lacunosa Town, there is a clockwork tradition, every day, its citizens wake up in the morning and go on their daily routine. However, once night comes, they rush to their homes and don't dare to go out until it's morning again. Most of its citizens are happy with their life, well except for one boy who has to put up with his parents every day. The boy's name is Arti, he feels lonely. "Another day, might as well go outside since my parents destroyed most of my belongings." Arti says with a depressed mood.

He went outside of his house, expecting this day to be a typical day, except tomorrow is the centennial Dragon Choice event, this event not only tests who has the strongest Dragon-type Pokemon, but the Pokemon is also the one to choose the trainer rather than the other way around, the winner gets the unanimous permission to leave Lacunosa Town at any time. Arti doesn't have a Pokemon of his own, so he's a little bit disappointed that he won't be able to enter. So he went to explore a nearby cave, just near the entrance where most trainers enter the town from.

Arti sprints through the grass as quickly as he could to get to the entrance of the cave, preferring to not encounter any wild Pokemon since he doesn't have a Pokemon with him either. After he gets to the entrance of the cave, he feels a strange breeze coming from it. He looks around to make sure his parents don't see him before entering the cave. He shines his flashlight to see the cave, nothing out of the ordinary, just some Roggenrola and Woobat minding their own business. Though he expected the cave to be a lot colder, something feels off to him, but he doesn't get how.

He climbs down to an exit that's deeper than the exits in which trainers pass through. He goes through it and what he sees surprises him, a forest ring, surrounded by the outside walls of the cave, he sees many trees that have been collapsed with plant life only now just growing on the bare soil in the middle. "Could this be related to the Team Plasma incident that happened a few years ago?" Arti asks to himself. However, he stopped himself from thinking too deep into that because if he wanted to make it home before dark, he would have to hurry. He pressed on further, surprised at the drop of temperature despite Unova being in the middle of summer. "So this is what the Giant Chasm looks like, huh."

Eventually, Arti arrived at another cave entrance, he feels the breeze has gotten stronger. "Well, here goes nothing!" he says, entering the cave with his flashlight on. Though, his flashlight isn't the only thing emitting light in the cave. He sees what it looks like a pair of yellow lights deep within the darkness... almost looking like eyes? Arti becomes a little scared, he doesn't know who or what is the source of those lights. "H-hello? Sorry to intrude here, whoever you are, I'm going to leave now." he says as he slowly starts taking steps back.

However, a deep raspy voice echoes in the cave, "I encourage you to stay." the voice says. This scares Arti even more, who is this? "Uh maybe I should be going." he says.
Not long after, he hears pounding footsteps and sees the pair of eye-like lights growing. Arti runs to the exit where it's still day, however, he trips over a rock and hits his knee. "Ow, this is the worst possible time to get hurt!" Arti says as he has trouble getting up. Eventually, the source of the lights eventually emerged out of the cave, revealing it to be the legendary Pokemon Kyurem. "Hello, human, I have been expecting you here." Kyurem begins to speak. Arti is confused, "Wasn't there a trainer who caught Kyurem a few years ago, what's this Pokemon doing back in the Giant Chasm?" he thinks to himself. Arti asks, still struggling to get up, "Didn't you join someone on a journey a few years ago?", for a few minutes, Kyurem answers, "I did join, but he insisted on letting me go, his reasons aren't clear to me, maybe he wasn't the right hero.", this confuses Arti even more and asks "Hero? Like the ones where Reshiram and Zekrom followed?"

Kyurem ignores that question and tells a story that not many people of the Pokemon world know about it, "For you to understand, I have to tell you my part of the story, I used to have powers of both fire and lightning. There were two heroes whom I followed, the older hero who wanted Unova to follow on the path of truths while the younger hero wanted ideals for the region. They started arguing, then a war broke out, I could not decide whose side to take, they both had valid points. I eventually split myself to try to settle the differences, but that only worsened the situation. The powers of fire and lighting took on a life of their own, with fire becoming Reshiram while lightning becoming Zekrom, they fought intensely with no end. While I hid in this cave, the battle kept going on, until the two heroes decided on a compromise. Reshiram and Zekrom however, were not satisfied with a compromise, so they resumed their fight, eventually, I had to force them into their stones. I did, but the damage was done, it was too late."

Arti feels some sympathy towards Kyurem, all he heard from people of Lacunosa Town was that Kyurem was a monster to be feared, but from Kyurem's perspective, the Pokemon is a lot nicer than what the people of Lacunosa Town claim to be. "What happened after that war?" Arti asked. "I was stuck in this broken form for centennials, forced to bear the pain of emptiness and loneliness." Kyurem answers. "Now I want to tell you why I was expecting you here." the legendary Pokemon continues, "I grow weaker by the minute, you can see that my powers aren't lasting long and I need a hero who understands what it is like to be lonely, seeing how you're not great at socializing with other humans, you may be the hero that I'm looking for.", Arti is amazed, he never thought that he would ever encounter a legendary Pokemon, let alone one who is willing to join him. He agrees to let Kyurem be his first Pokemon, "I accept your request, I wanted to get out of Lacunosa Town for such a long time, so tell you what, come meet me at the town tomorrow during at midday and we will be on a journey together.", Kyurem replied with "I will join you there and even battle for you when you need me to do so."

Arti realizes that the sun is coming, "Looks like I have to go, I'll see you tomorrow, I promise." he says, running back to his home before his parents realize where he went. Needless to say, Arti is really excited about tomorrow's event, he can't stop thinking about it.
 
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- In the simple town called Lacunosa Town <- towns are towns when they are towns.
- Interesting narration style.
- Weird world. So like it's forbidden to leave unless you get permission?
- just some Roggenrola and Woobats minding their own business <- Inconsistency in whether or not to use an S to pluralize Pokemon species names.
- "H-hello? Sorry to intrude here, whoever you are, I'm going to leave now." <- Well this guy is adorable.
- Should be a paragraph break when there's a new speaker.
- Well this is happening very very fast.
- Interesting twist on the story at least. Portraying Kyurem as benevolent and not just the husk that wants to freeze everything. Gotta say though, it comes across as a very unimposing being.
- Giving it a reason to join the kid at least.

Very rushy opening, I have to say. Even to me who doesn't mind rushing too much. The concept is okay enough for a story about a boy and his god - most importantly there's a decent reason and interesting concept on having him be considered a Hero - but felt it would've served better if you took some time to set things up. Show why the kid's lonely, and introduce a few people around town - possibly setting up some people for the tournament - before getting into it.

Will be keeping an eye on this one. Has some potential, can say that much!
 
Looking for a way to be whole again.
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- In the simple town called Lacunosa Town <- towns are towns when they are towns.
- Interesting narration style.
- Weird world. So like it's forbidden to leave unless you get permission?
- just some Roggenrola and Woobats minding their own business <- Inconsistency in whether or not to use an S to pluralize Pokemon species names.
- "H-hello? Sorry to intrude here, whoever you are, I'm going to leave now." <- Well this guy is adorable.
- Should be a paragraph break when there's a new speaker.
- Well this is happening very very fast.
- Interesting twist on the story at least. Portraying Kyurem as benevolent and not just the husk that wants to freeze everything. Gotta say though, it comes across as a very unimposing being.
- Giving it a reason to join the kid at least.

Very rushy opening, I have to say. Even to me who doesn't mind rushing too much. The concept is okay enough for a story about a boy and his god - most importantly there's a decent reason and interesting concept on having him be considered a Hero - but felt it would've served better if you took some time to set things up. Show why the kid's lonely, and introduce a few people around town - possibly setting up some people for the tournament - before getting into it.

Will be keeping an eye on this one. Has some potential, can say that much!
Thanks for the critique, this is my first time writing a full-on fanfiction, I'll take anything I can use to improve the story.
 
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Chapter 2: The Struggle
Arti arrives at his house in a hurry, he opens the door to reveal his parents waiting for him inside. He starts getting worried as this means that this is usually a bad thing.

"Arti, where were you?" Arti's mother asks in a serious tone. Scared, Arti decided to lie since if he told his parents that he went to the Giant Chasm, he would be in major trouble. "I walked around town today, nothing unusual." he said, but his father doubts his claim, which makes him have a bad feeling about what's going to happen.

"Why did you lie to your mother? We haven't seen you in Lacunosa Town at all during noon!", his father responds. "Oh come on dad, would you really think I would leave town?" Arti claims in an attempt to end this argument early, but his parents kept being persistent about this subject. "Arti, just tell us where you have been all day." his mother says. "Uh, I went to a cave and explored it, I fell on a rock due to the cave being too dark." Arti tries another claim in a hurry in order to justify the injury on his knee, while exploring a cave was technically true, his parents didn't buy it anyway. His father points out the flashlight that Arti was carrying. "We know you always come prepared to explore a cave, just tell us where you have been!", the father is starting to get angry at this point and the mother is just getting sick of lies.

Arti, with no other choice but to tell where he really went, decided to take the inevitable fate of being yelled at before it gets worse. He sighs and hesitantly tells the truth "I... went to the G-g-giant C-chasm.", his father immediately raised his voice, "Why would you go there? That area is off-limits! No one from this town is allowed to go to the Giant Chasm, why do you always disobey people?!", this made Arti become very defensive and angry, causing him to yell "Oh what do you know? You always take the superior's side, I'm sick of it! What's wrong with having even a tiny bit of adventure?!", this started to upset his mother. The father continues yelling, "Safety is why we agree with the superior! We shouldn't have to keep telling you not to go to the Giant Chasm, you should know that rule by now."

This is the final straw for Arti, he was tired of his parents never being supportive when it came to defending himself against superiors, he continues to yell "Ugh, this is so typical, you're always a stickler for that dumb rule!", Arti's father had enough, "You're grounded for talking back to me. Go to your room, now.", which Arti responds "Fine!" before storming off to his room and slamming the door in anger. He lays on his bed, it looking like he was about to cry after losing that argument, he wonders if he would ever be able to leave Lacunosa Town for good, "Why did I have to live in this dumb town? Any other place would've been better to live in...", he turns off the light in his room before going to sleep early, but not before he says "Tomorrow can't come soon enough, I hope Kyurem keeps promises."

The sun rises as Arti wakes up still feeling a little depressed about what happened last night. "I hope today is my lucky break." he says as he goes down to eat breakfast, he did not talk to his parents at all during the morning and ate breakfast without thinking about talking to them. After finishing his breakfast and changing to his usual clothes, he went outside. Arti encountered a few bullies who make his life even harder. "Look at this dweeb, all sad because he doesn't get praised by his mommy and daddy.", the bullies laugh at Arti while no one else in town tries to defend him, Arti does his best to ignore them, "Just 3 hours before noon." he says under his breath, doing his best from letting his anger getting the best of him. While Arti knows that he would be able to leave town freely, it takes a whole month for the permission to do so to activate.

To do his best to forget about the bullies, he goes to the Pokemon Center to buy some necessities for the event, like Potions and Ethers with the money he has left. As soon as he sets foot outside the Pokemon Center, the leader of the bullies named Bruin starts pushing him around. Annoyed, Arti yells "Hey! Quit it!", a police officer hears the commotion and goes to stop a fight from happening. "Alright, break it up, ya punks." the police officer says while separating Arti and Bruin.

Arti hurries home and starts packing the backpack with what he bought, hoping to pass the time before the meeting with Kyurem, his room smells rotten, probably because the window is open while the garbage can is right under the window "Blegh, I always hated the smell of my room, even more of a reason to leave." he thought as he opened his backpack. After packing everything, he went to watch some TV in the living room to pass the rest of the time. He is watching a documentary showing a group of Durant trying to distract a Heatmor from attacking their underground nest, the next part after that shows an intense battle between a Seviper and a Zangoose.

After the clock finally hits noon, Arti hurries outside, he sees five Dragon-type Pokemon waiting for the Dragon Choice event: Dragonite, Salamence, Hydreigon, Garchomp, and Haxorus. He also sees eleven contestants, one more spot is left for both a contestant and a Dragon-type Pokemon. Arti quickly reserves the final contestant spot and as if on cue, he feels that breeze that he felt back at the Giant Chasm, Kyurem arrived shortly after, taking the final Dragon-type Pokemon spot. The townspeople start getting worried about their town. Arti realizes that one of the other five contestants is Bruin, but this doesn't phase him as he is excited to take part in the event that will allow him to leave the place that made his life hard. The growing crowd is shocked by Kyurem's arrival, they keep their distance from the Boundary Pokemon because they heard terrifying stories about it.

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the centennial Dragon Choice event! I am Shaun, I am your host for this event. " Shaun begins and explains the rules, "As per tradition, there are twelve possible trainers but these Pokemon will choose one of them and only six of the trainers will be chosen in total to advance to the single-elimination tournament, the battle style will a Single Battle. The winner will be able to leave town whenever they want, while those who have ranked under them can leave the town in two weeks." The crowd followed Shaun to an open field, where the only hazards are rocky walls and trees on the sides.

The setting of the battle is just outside Lacunosa Town toward the way in which most trainers enter the place. It has many trees on its south side and rocky walls line the north side of the field, there are bleachers perched high on the west and east so the audience can watch the battle without them being hit by Pokemon attacks. Shaun sits on the west side with a microphone, ready to commentate during the tournament. There are speakers on the sides of the bleachers where his voice will sound through.

"Let the choosing round begin!" Shaun says. The first round started and the Dragon-type Pokemon began choosing their trainers. The trainer and Pokemon duo became as follows: Arti with Kyurem, Bruin with Dragonite, a girl with glasses with Haxorus, a tall boy with Salamence, a short girl with Garchomp, and a stocky boy with Hydreigon.

"The choosing round is over!" the host proclaims. "These six trainers will move on to the tournament round, this round will test the strength and power of the Pokemon through Single Battles. The tournament round will begin in ten minutes." Arti was a little bit worried that Kyurem would have picked someone else, so he was relieved that Kyurem picked him.

Arti and Kyurem take some time to discuss some things. "Thanks for coming, I was worried that you wouldn't come after all." Arti says, Kyurem replies with "I keep promises to whoever I follow, no matter what is the hero's desire.", Arti asks "With your power weakened, are you still able to battle against such powerful Pokemon? I don't want you to get hurt out there for nothing.", Kyurem answers "While my power did wane quite a bit, I am still able to defeat the likes of Dragonite and Salamence, but I'm in the need of getting stronger after this if I'm going to be able to assist you in our journey.", the crowd looks at Kyurem with concern because they felt the weather change just by its presence.

Shaun introduces the first round of the tournament after ten minutes passed, "This first round is Haxorus vs Dragonite! One Pokemon often gets into fights for territory while the other is friendly, but can be destructive if you get on its bad side." Bruin and his opponent gets to the opposite sides of the field in preparation for their Pokemon to battle, Shaun counts the timer down, "Ready, set. Battle!"

Dragonite starts the battle with a Dragon Pulse, which barely hits Haxorus, who tried to dodge. "Wow! The attack almost missed! What a lucky hit for Dragonite!" Shaun's voice echoes in the speakers. Haxorus went for a Breaking Swipe, hitting Dragonite with its tusks, pushing the Dragon Pokemon back.

"Yeowch! Haxorus's tusks are nothing to laugh at, especially when used in combination with such a powerful move."

The crowd goes wild, a group chanting Dragonite while another chanting Haxorus.

This move surprised Bruin, "What the?!" came up inside Bruin's mind. Dragonite looks really hurt, but still able to battle.

Bruin commanded his Dragonite, "Use Outrage now!", Dragonite responded and slammed its body onto Haxorus, launching the Axe Jaw Pokemon right into a tree. Haxorus is now laying there, just looking at the sky with no strength left.

"The classic powerful move where the user attacks without thinking at all, Pokemon who use this move become confused. But being on the receiving end is definitely a lot worse!"

Shaun announces the winner, "Dragonite wins!". Bruin just has a smirk on his face for the victory.

The group chanting Dragonite cheers that the Pokemon they supported won.

The second round is introduced, "Round two is Hydreigon vs Salamence! Two very dangerous Pokemon with scary behavior, one them even has a Mega Evolution that causes it to attack its own trainer, the other attacks anything that moves." Shaun states.

Both of the Pokemon and their trainers prepare to battle. "Ready, set. Battle!" the host says once more.

Salamence starts the round with a Dragon Claw, hitting Hydreigon on its right head. A scratch can be seen above the jaw.

"Ooh, that scratch looks nasty, but this does not help much for Salamence, as only the middle head of Hydreigon has the mind of the Pokemon."

Hydreigon roared in pain, but responded with a Dragon Rush, slamming right into Salamence, causing it to crash into a few tree branches. Salamence makes a long roar as it feels the tree branches hit its back.

"Yikes, getting hit in the back by thick tree branches while being pushed 20 mph toward them is bad for the backside!"

Salamence used Dragon Tail to throw Hydreigon off its game, but unfortunately for Salamence, the tail barely missed Hydreigon.

"Salamence needed that attack to connect, talk about bad luck."

Hydreigon finished the battle with a Dragon Breath, defeating Salamence for round two. Salamence now lays on its side with its back covered with splinters and leaves. "This round's winner is Hydreigon!". Hydreigon's trainer stood proud as the crowd cheered for him.

The third round is proclaimed by Shaun, "This round is Kyurem vs Hydreigon! We already heard about Hydreigon's scary behavior but Kyurem seems to be feared a lot more given only very few people know about the Pokemon.", Arti immediately went to his side of the field, ready to tell Kyurem which attacks to use against the opponent. "Ready, set. Battle!" the host said.

Arti spoke to Kyurem "Alright Kyurem, I think you know a move that only you can use it, I'm trying to remember hearing your previous companion say it in the Pokemon League on TV, was its name Glaciate? If you know it, I need you to use it!"

At the beginning of the battle, Kyurem responded by using the said move, freezing the air around Hydreigon and causing damage to the Brutal Pokemon. This excites Arti "Yes, you're doing it!"

Hydreigon however, attacked strongly with an Outrage, slamming onto Kyurem at high speeds. "Hahraann!" Kyurem cried out in pain and also in anger toward Hydreigon, "You can handle it, I believe in you, Kyurem!" Arti aims to be supportive of his friend, but he had a worrying thought going through his mind, "Oh no, I thought Kyurem would be able to handle the move!"

"Now use Dragon Pulse on the middle head!", Arti commands as Kyurem launches the move straight at Hydreigon's main head, knocking the Brutal Pokemon unconscious with a Critical Hit. This relieved Kyurem of its anger toward Hydreigon, which the Brutal Pokemon is not hovering as it's instead covered with cold water from the former frozen Glaciate attack.

Only a very small percentage of the crowd cheers for Arti, but he doesn't care about how many people cheer for him, he's just happy for Kyurem.

"The winner for this round is Kyurem!" Shaun proclaims. Arti is relieved that Kyurem managed to win this battle, despite the odds being stacked against his friend.

The fourth round is about to begin, with Shaun saying "The semi-final round will be Garchomp vs Dragonite! We heard of Dragonite being a friendly Pokemon but dangerous if angered, Garchomp has scary jaws and it can be pretty fast too, which also makes it a dangerous Pokemon to encounter in the wild, especially if enraged.", Bruin gets to his side of the field, he and Dragonite facing his opponent. "Ready, set. Battle!"

Garchomp starts the battle with Dual Chop, both hits connect to Dragonite from different sides and leaving a mark on both sides of the Dragon Pokemon's torso.

"That looked very painful, Garchomp's claws are just as dangerous as its jaw."

Bruin commands Dragonite, "Use Twister!" Dragonite used its wings to whip up strong winds around Garchomp.

The move blows Garchomp towards a rocky wall, crashing into it. Garchomp responds with a Dragon Claw, slashing at Dragonite's torso, making the Dragon Pokemon roar out in pain.

The two Pokemon are severely hurt, "Use Outrage!" Bruins shouted in desperation.

Dragonite launches itself toward Garchomp and slams into the Mach Pokemon. Garchomp drops to the ground, dirty from the wall of the cave.

"Getting sandwiched between a wall and a heavy Pokemon is never a good feeling, let's hope Garchomp doesn't have any broken bones after this!"

"The win for this round goes to Dragonite!" Shaun announces. Afterward, the trainers heal their Pokemon. After Arti has watched this battle unfold, he begins to lose confidence now that the Bruin has won it, but Arti makes it his goal for the final battle to stand up for himself by beating his rival.

"The final match is here, folks! Who will be able to get a head start on their journey? You will find out through this battle!" Shaun announces, "It's Kyurem vs Dragonite, the battle to test which of these two Dragon-type Pokemon is able to come out on top begins!" Arti and Bruin get to their respective sides of the battlefield with their Pokemon. "Ready, set. Battle!" the host says one final time.

"Alright Kyurem, use Dragon Claw!" Arti shouts the command, Kyurem charges at Dragonite and strikes it with its sharp, icicle-like claws, leaving a claw mark on Dragonite's chest. Kyurem felt satisfied, considering that claw mark as a sign of Kyurem's dominance against its rival.

"Owch, getting claw marks from the chill, talk about having the coldest pain imaginable."

"Shake it off and use Twister!" Bruin shouted, Dragonite obeyed the command and launched the move at Kyurem, hitting the Boundary Pokemon, but Kyurem stood its ground despite taking damage from the wind. Kyurem feels weaker from the harsh wind that Dragonite whipped up.

"How did Kyurem withstand that overwhelmingly strong wind? Could there be more to the Pokemon than we know of?"

"Okay Kyurem, now use Dragon Pulse!" Arti shouted, Kyurem uses the move and manages to barely hit Dragonite on its wing as it tried to fly high enough, causing the Dragon Pokemon to come crashing down into a fallen down tree trunk. Kyurem felt glad that it managed to make sure Dragonite can't get height advantage anymore.

"Looks like Dragonite can't fly now, how will it able to use strong winds to its advantage?"

Bruin yells "Use Outrage!", resulting in Dragonite slamming its torso on Kyurem. Knocking the Boundary Pokemon into a rocky wall. "Must... keep... going." Kyurem tries to keep its head up, but this is proving to be painful for the Boundary Pokemon. The crowd cheers that the Pokemon that they fear is likely going to lose the battle.

This scares Arti as he did not expect his partner to crash into anything, he feels his heart pounding in his chest as he sees Kyurem struggling to lift its head, but at the same time, Bruin is terrified after seeing Dragonite having trouble flying and lifting its arms.

The two Dragon-type Pokemon are now neck and neck, either of them could collapse at any moment. The crowd stands up at this very moment, wondering who will win this battle.

"I will use every last bit of my strength to win." Kyurem reassures Arti.

He responds with "You're almost there buddy, you just need to do enough damage to Dragonite to win! Now use Glaciate!" Arti is terrified of a likely loss, as he didn't want to be in Lacunosa Town a week longer.

Kyurem used the move and froze the air around Dragonite, damaging it and finally defeating the Dragon Pokemon. Kyurem is happy to have defeated its rival as that's a sign of being the dominant Dragon-type Pokemon. Dragonite on the other hand, falls on its front, covered with dirt as its wings droop toward its back.

"The winner for this Dragon Choice event is Kyurem!" Shaun proudly proclaims as the crowd gathers around Arti and Kyurem. Arti celebrates with Kyurem, excited about the victory. Most of the crowd is surprised by this win, not only were they scared of Kyurem, they were expecting Dragonite to win.

"You did it! Thank you for keeping your promise, I couldn't have done this without you!" Arti happily praises Kyurem, the Boundary Pokemon lays down to rest after the battle.

"I'm just happy to help a hero who cares about a Pokemon's well being." Kyurem says. Arti responds "You should rest for the day, I bought some Potions and Ethers to help you recover. Now that you're officially allowed in town, you can sleep right outside my house.", Kyurem takes the offer.

"I accept your hospitality, we will rest for the day and start our journey tomorrow." Kyurem decided.

The two went to Arti's house, when they arrived at the door, Arti used the Potions and Ethers he bought on Kyurem to help the Boundary Pokemon recover. The sun sets as everyone heads home.
 
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- Opening sentence is a bit awkwardly phrased
- at all during noon <- They just looked for him at noon? That's it?
- The superior, huh? Kind of an awkward way to refer to the town leader, but I strangely don't dislike it. It almost gives it a police state and/or cult like feel. Which it kind of is given this town refuses to let anyone leave unless they abide by their weird culture.
- May want to mark the scene break between Arti going to sleep and the next day.
- Go to the Giant Chasm, no problem. Talk back, get grounded. Just for the day mind you. Well I do get the feeling this town kinda sucks so.
- Arti dies his best <- DIE, TYPO, DIE
- The permission needs to activate? That's kind of odd wording. Maybe you were looking for being approved?
- starts packing backpack <- Typo
- Imagine how embarrassing it would've been if either of the last slots got filled before Arti or Kyurem got there.
- Surprised that Shaun is taking Kyurem showing up extremely casually. In fact, there's like no mention of anyone being phased by it right after the paragraph where it makes its entrance.
- Hold up how's that tournament style make any sense? There's 6 pairs so you can't make an even tournament with strict 1v1s like that.
- Then there's the mention of the approval process being kinda thrown out the window with the implication they can just immediately leave.
- Well hopefully that is foreshadowing. Because if Kyurem can defeat Salamence and Dragonite easy peasy, what is it going to have trouble beating that it needs to get stronger to beat?
- bad side". <- Misplaced period
- Like the introductions of Pokemon and briefly explaining them.
- Wait Hydreigon in round 3 when it was just in round 2?
- How were the odds stacked against Kyurem? It looked to me like it took one bad hit but then slapped down Hydreigon.
- Okay guess you're going with byes in the tournament? Only explanation, but it would serve well to explain it.
- Bruins yelled <- Typo
- Gharchomp <- And another
- Dirty from the wall of what cave? The only thing mentioned was a cliff face.
- Silly announcer. It withstood it because it's just Twister. And it's against Kyurem.
- Jeez. Hope "a week longer" is just a turn of phrase, because it was just said earlier he'd have to wait two weeks if he lost. If so, might want to change it to be a day longer.
- Thought there'd be a bit more interaction between Bruin and Arti during and after the battle. Really, even for hastily setting them up as rivals, it's hard to care at all when their only interaction was extremely brief. Like, no taunting at all between them? It's like Bruin stops existing after losing.
- Shoutouts to Ethers.

Gotta be honest here, this could use a bit of work. There's nothing wrong with rushing through five battles all in one chapter, or setting up the main thing with the legendary and dropping being a hero in the very first chapter. But you're rushing so much it's hard to care about anything. Like you seem to have good ideas, you're just not giving them enough time to breath.

Like you did the right thing in setting up a rival for the tournament and having people be antsy and not like Kyurem. You didn't do a good job at all of exploring or setting those points up, however. If Bruin and his posse were introduced in the first chapter and got a fairly meaty scene dedicated to him and his bullying of Arti, that'd give the reader reason to want to see him get his ass kicked in the battle, as well as establishing why Arti is so lonely and feeling ostracized. As is, he's like an afterthought, there to try to create drama but failing because the mere presence of a rival doesn't create it on its own. You need a reason for it to matter.

Or the people not liking Kyurem. All it gets is a mention as an aside at the end of one paragraph, and saying that people aren't really cheering for it. So if we brought those two together, what if Bruin is the popular guy expected to win the tournament and Arti is the quiet "dweeb" who's only in it because of some very powerful Pokemon? It'd add to drama to their battle with all the people cheering against him, especially if it actually affects him a bit. OR it'd say something about his character if it does not.

There's nothing wrong with going slower - it's often to the benefit of your story anyway if you set things up. Don't feel you have to blaze through. It's a pitfall a lot of first time Pokemon fanfiction writers fall into. For example could easily see these first two being three or four chapters, properly expanded. You do have some solid ideas and stuff to work with however. So yeah. Stuff to consider with edits/moving forward. :>
 
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- Opening sentence is a bit awkwardly phrased
- at all during noon <- They just looked for him at noon? That's it?
- The superior, huh? Kind of an awkward way to refer to the town leader, but I strangely don't dislike it. It almost gives it a police state and/or cult like feel. Which it kind of is given this town refuses to let anyone leave unless they abide by their weird culture.
- May want to mark the scene break between Arti going to sleep and the next day.
- Go to the Giant Chasm, no problem. Talk back, get grounded. Just for the day mind you. Well I do get the feeling this town kinda sucks so.
- Arti dies his best <- DIE, TYPO, DIE
- The permission needs to activate? That's kind of odd wording. Maybe you were looking for being approved?
- starts packing backpack <- Typo
- Imagine how embarrassing it would've been if either of the last slots got filled before Arti or Kyurem got there.
- Surprised that Shaun is taking Kyurem showing up extremely casually. In fact, there's like no mention of anyone being phased by it right after the paragraph where it makes its entrance.
- Hold up how's that tournament style make any sense? There's 6 pairs so you can't make an even tournament with strict 1v1s like that.
- Then there's the mention of the approval process being kinda thrown out the window with the implication they can just immediately leave.
- Well hopefully that is foreshadowing. Because if Kyurem can defeat Salamence and Dragonite easy peasy, what is it going to have trouble beating that it needs to get stronger to beat?
- bad side". <- Misplaced period
- Like the introductions of Pokemon and briefly explaining them.
- Wait Hydreigon in round 3 when it was just in round 2?
- How were the odds stacked against Kyurem? It looked to me like it took one bad hit but then slapped down Hydreigon.
- Okay guess you're going with byes in the tournament? Only explanation, but it would serve well to explain it.
- Bruins yelled <- Typo
- Gharchomp <- And another
- Dirty from the wall of what cave? The only thing mentioned was a cliff face.
- Silly announcer. It withstood it because it's just Twister. And it's against Kyurem.
- Jeez. Hope "a week longer" is just a turn of phrase, because it was just said earlier he'd have to wait two weeks if he lost. If so, might want to change it to be a day longer.
- Thought there'd be a bit more interaction between Bruin and Arti during and after the battle. Really, even for hastily setting them up as rivals, it's hard to care at all when their only interaction was extremely brief. Like, no taunting at all between them? It's like Bruin stops existing after losing.
- Shoutouts to Ethers.

Gotta be honest here, this could use a bit of work. There's nothing wrong with rushing through five battles all in one chapter, or setting up the main thing with the legendary and dropping being a hero in the very first chapter. But you're rushing so much it's hard to care about anything. Like you seem to have good ideas, you're just not giving them enough time to breath.

Like you did the right thing in setting up a rival for the tournament and having people be antsy and not like Kyurem. You didn't do a good job at all of exploring or setting those points up, however. If Bruin and his posse were introduced in the first chapter and got a fairly meaty scene dedicated to him and his bullying of Arti, that'd give the reader reason to want to see him get his ass kicked in the battle, as well as establishing why Arti is so lonely and feeling ostracized. As is, he's like an afterthought, there to try to create drama but failing because the mere presence of a rival doesn't create it on its own. You need a reason for it to matter.

Or the people not liking Kyurem. All it gets is a mention as an aside at the end of one paragraph, and saying that people aren't really cheering for it. So if we brought those two together, what if Bruin is the popular guy expected to win the tournament and Arti is the quiet "dweeb" who's only in it because of some very powerful Pokemon? It'd add to drama to their battle with all the people cheering against him, especially if it actually affects him a bit. OR it'd say something about his character if it does not.

There's nothing wrong with going slower - it's often to the benefit of your story anyway if you set things up. Don't feel you have to blaze through. It's a pitfall a lot of first time Pokemon fanfiction writers fall into. For example could easily see these first two being three or four chapters, properly expanded. You do have some solid ideas and stuff to work with however. So yeah. Stuff to consider with edits/moving forward. :>
Fixed the typo, and yeah, I'll try to go slower next for the next chapter.
 
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Chapter 3: The Journey Begins

Arti woke up at 9:00 AM, very excited to get the journey of a lifetime started. But he had to make just a few more preparations before starting, like getting a Town Map, buying a few Poke Balls and getting access to the Pokemon Center's PC in case he manages to catch more than six Pokemon, Kyurem included. He checks his backpack before changing to make sure if he has enough leftover Potions and Ethers for the journey ahead. However, one thing still manages to bring his mood down: the morning routine involving his parents.

Heading downstairs, Arti meets his parents for breakfast, willing to talk to them this time. "Good morning..." Arti hesitantly announces to his parents. "Good morning Arti." both his mother and father say separately. "Once I'm done with breakfast, I'll be out of this house for good." he speaks under his breath, just quiet enough to make sure his father didn't hear him. "You let a monster sleep right outside our house, can't say I'm happy about that." his father states disappointingly. Arti's mood changed into annoyed as soon as he heard that, "Are you seriously going to bring this up? It was only for one night, you can be so unbearable at times!" Arti defends Kyurem and justifies the Boundary Pokemon's stay in Lacunosa Town. "We are just worried about our safety, is what your father is saying." Arti's mother agrees with his father, who resisted the urge to yell just this one time. Arti just lets out the statement that upsets his parents greatly, "Whatever, just don't bother trying to convince me to come back.", after which he finishes his breakfast and gets up from the chair. Arti's parents try to stop him, his mother asks "Where are you going?" before getting interrupted by the door closing right in front of her, finally separating Arti from his parents.

After breakfast, Arti wears his backpack and heads outside to meet his friend. "Greetings!" Kyurem says, "How are you doing this morning?" the Boundary Pokemon asks. Arti responds "I'm doing fine but I had a run-in with my parents, they can be such a pain in the neck sometimes. Anyways, I just need to pick up a few more supplies before we head out." The duo went to the Pokemon Center for the supplies, "Wait here, I'll be out in a minute." Arti tells Kyurem to wait outside the Pokemon Center. Inside he notices a stand with Town Maps arranged much like brochures, he takes one showing the locations of all cities and routes of Unova.

Meanwhile, the people in Lacunosa Town are sprinting past the Boundary Pokemon to get on their daily life, hoping that it doesn't notice them. They still don't take their eyes off of Kyurem out of fear.

Before heading out, Arti makes sure to buy a few Poke Balls as well as a few more Ethers and Potions for the road ahead. He puts all the items he got from the Pokemon Center into his backpack and accesses the PC in order to know how to use the Pokemon storage system. He heads out to meet Kyurem outside. However, before the duo could take another step, Bruin comes in with his Dragonite to them starts causing trouble again. "Ugh, this guy again?" Arti is tired of seeing Bruin. "Well, look who we have here, a cheater!" Bruin claims while Dragonite starts to swipe at Kyurem, which begins to anger the Boundary Pokemon "Just because I beat you in a Pokemon battle doesn't mean I cheated." Arti responds to the bully who now became his rival. "Don't get comfortable, because once I'm allowed to leave this town, you will have a bad time. You're gonna wish you never took part in the tournament!" Bruin proudly says to Arti. Meanwhile, Dragonite wants a rematch with Kyurem and is trying to hit it, but it's missing the hits.

Arti is getting sick of Bruin, "Step aside." Arti warns Bruin. "Before what?" Bruin mockingly asks while pushing Arti to the ground. "Before my friend forces you to." Arti gets up while trying to give Bruin a chance to stop. "I'm not stepping aside just because some weakling had beginner's luck." Bruin refuses to take the warning, Dragonite is preparing to start the supposed rematch. "Alright, you asked for it. Kyurem, scare him away." Arti ordered. "With pleasure." Kyurem responds, using Scary Face. Upon using the move, Kyurem's face had a mask with few rows of icicle teeth and a menacing smile. Once Bruin saw the mask he sprinted away, scared for his life, with Dragonite following him, angry that Kyurem had stopped the rematch.

"There, that should allow us to get on with our journey! So, where should we go next?" Arti asks Kyurem, opening up his Town Map. Kyurem responds "We should go to a place that has documented Unova's history, it could give us more information on where the stones are so I could get stronger."

Arti asks again "Wait, you don't know where the stones you talked about are?", Kyurem responds "With the stones moving around so much and exchanging hands, I lost track of them."

"That makes sense, I guess." Arti says, "At least there's a good chance that one of them is in the place that you talk about. Okay, it's settled, we are going to Nacrene City and visit its museum." as Arti continues, Kyurem states "It's going to take a few weeks to get there, after all, Unova is a big place. I suggest we start heading through Route 13, not only this way is quicker, I heard the calm ocean breeze is soothing to humans." Arti accepts Kyurem's idea, saying "Alright, we will start going from there."

The duo heads to Route 13, they stop and look at Lacunosa Town one final time. "Goodbye, Lacunosa Town, you will not be missed." Arti says as the worried townspeople go about their daily life. The duo takes their first steps out of the town freely, starting their journey.
 
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- As brief as it is, is neat to see healing items being paid attention to. And hey buying Ethers too. One good thing about this town.
- Again, make sure you break paragraph whenever a new speaker comes in.
- Man okay that scene didn't read as intended. Even with what happened before, Arti is more coming across as angsty teenaged brat than justifiably depressed and lonely.
- Do like Bruin's opening line here. Wish he'd go into a bit more as to why he feels Arti cheated.
- you will have a bad time. <- So he's Sans? Excellent. I still need to play that game.
- How is the Dragonite missing a giant ice dragon, anyway?
- wise little arti, corrupted by his own power, can no leader go untainted
- Also for a rival character man is Bruin coming across as unthreatening. Especially with Arti just able to go "piss off or my big legendary ice dragon will eat you"
- Well these stones changed hands very recently so that will be a mess for them to find.
- humans.", <- Unneeded comma
- And moving on from the town that is hell but is not exactly fully touched upon why it is hell.

Well, it's entertaining in its own little way. I'm going on with the trust that Arti is supposed to be going a little mad with power because man he kind of came across as a huge ass in this chapter. Like really, between how he treated his parents and how he relied on Kyurem to chase off Bruin, he's just a jerk right now. But, we'll see how it goes. Maybe.

Also jeez this one was too short to really be called a chapter, but...
 
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Chapter 4: Revelations and Confessions

Arti and Kyurem begin their trek down Route 13.

"It feels so good to finally leave Lacunosa Town." Arti says.

Kyurem asks Arti a serious question now that he can say anything without someone trying to silence him.

"I must ask, what happened to you back there? I know you wanted to leave as soon as possible."

"Well, I had a horrible life in that place, my parents never supported me when I needed the help, even against bullies like Bruin who always seem to pick on me at every possible chance. My father was always 'Man up, you won't get anything in life if you show your vulnerability!' but how would I not try to get the situation solved when nobody in the town even tries to support me? I know I had a different attitude today but when you spend years forced to stay in a town where nobody wants to help you with problems against bullies while you are also forced to keep quiet about your problems, it starts getting to you." Arti answers. "I had a lot of trouble making friends back at home because of those experiences."

As the duo goes through the lush grass on their way to Undella Town, Arti continues "Anyways, thanks for helping me scare Bruin away, he was always looking for ways to make my life horrible, even threatening me multiple times. It's just that... I felt like I had absolutely no say against anyone, even when I needed to defend myself, so I really appreciate your help on getting me out of that place." he finally calms down after trying to hold in his emotions.

Kyurem is surprised how related this is its situation a few years ago.

"I went through a similar situation, as you see, there was a horrible human who went by the name of Ghetsis, I thought he meant well for the Unova region until he used me for his twisted and horrible scheme of freezing Opelucid City and causing me pain in the process. Worst of all, I could never rebel against him because he had a Hydreigon who was too strong. I had no other choice but to ask for Zekrom's help, little did I know Ghetsis wanted exactly that. During the battle against another human's partners, I was letting myself be defeated on purpose so the split would cause a blinding light, allowing me to escape the horrible man and his Hydreigon."

"I have you to thank for giving me a chance to reclaim my powers. After Ghetsis, I had trouble trusting humans to not want to use my powers like it's nothing. You only had me scare your rival away for self-defense, which is understandable." Kyurem states.

The duo arrives at a staircase on their left that goes down to the beach area.

"So, the stones that you told me about, what are they?" Arti changes the topic with a different question.

Kyurem tells Arti what they are specifically.

"They are known as the Light Stone and the Dark Stone, which contain Reshiram and Zekrom themselves. While humans today are aware of their existence, no human knows about a third stone: the God Stone."

"The God Stone?" Arti repeats, confused about a stone with a powerful name.

"Yes, the God Stone. Unlike the Light and Dark Stones, the God Stone does not contain a Pokemon but rather, the balance that was with me when I originally had both halves of my power. After splitting, I used what I could muster to send the God Stone out to space, where humans at the time of the war did not have the technology to go to. After the war was over, it fell down into the Giant Chasm, a few curious inhabitants of Lacunosa Town went to investigate one night, I told them that they need to hide the God Stone in a place where humans won't even think to look. They accepted my request and went to look." Kyurem explains.

"So, what happened?" Arti asks.

"After they hid the God Stone, they never came back to Lacunosa Town. Nothing bad happened to them because when I checked on them, they seemed to be enjoying their exploration, so I just left them alone, trusting them to have hidden the stone where other humans have no chance in finding." Kyurem answers.

"So, why did you have the God Stone hidden so well?" Arti wonders as the duo goes down the staircase to the beach area on their left.

"That's because I believe that only truly responsible heroes should have that kind of power, the ones who are willing to help others out of bad situations." Kyurem answers then continue with "So, in order for you to help me get stronger, you will have to prove that you actually want to help others. You're in luck because recently, I heard some cities are having conflicts and there is a suspicious group of humans that may cause trouble for others later. Do you have what it takes to be the responsible hero Unova needs?"

"I believe I do, after all I have been through, I aim to help others out of terrible situations so they don't have to suffer from their situation as long as I did suffer from mine." Arti answers with honesty, but he asks "What are we going to do when we arrive at Undella Town? I don't want the people over there to be scared about your presence."

"I, unfortunately, see only one option for both of us to be there without making the humans scared, I have to hide in one of your spherical devices." Kyurem responds disappointingly.

"But why would you want to go into a Poke Ball? I don't think that is such a good idea. Let's try to find other ways." Arti tries to find alternatives.

"Well, think of this as your first trial, making a difficult decision whether to keep me in the open air or to make sure the humans don't panic when we arrive." Kyurem explains its reasoning, waiting for Arti to answer.

"Why are you trusting me with your life? I just don't see what you see differently about me compared to other people." Arti begins to doubt.

"Sometimes, heroes have to make decisions that don't agree with their preferences, even if they end up with a worse fate afterward. I myself don't like having to go inside one of the 'Poke Balls' as you humans call it. But if it's for the betterment of humans and Pokemon as a whole, then I have to go against my preferences. I tell you this because you will have a role in stopping a catastrophe in Unova if you succeed in proving yourself worthy. You will know more in time as we get closer to that day." Kyurem responds.

"Worthy?" Arti asks in confusion.

"I see your potential as the hero to restore the balance between Truth and Ideals, for many years, conflicts between these philosophies happened in Unova, you seemed to go against the extreme ends of both back in Lacunosa Town, against the extreme Truths of your parents and against the extreme Ideals of Bruin. It all begins by giving Pokemon and humans some reassurance." Kyurem adds. "So I need you to start making sure you can be trusted, hide my presence so you can have a better chance at succeeding on this task. You will also need to talk about the details of the war between the heroes of Truth and Ideals that were left out by historians."

"That sounds like a big task, but if that must be done, then you have my support." Arti accepts.

"This is not going to be easy." Kyurem stated, "The trials ahead will test you in unexpected ways, be ready for them as they are part of the task."

The duo stops on the beach as Arti focuses on making this hard decision while he feels the ocean breeze, he wants to be able to talk with people, but he doesn't know how they will react to Kyurem's presence. On the other hand, he wants Kyurem to walk free after waiting in the Giant Chasm for 3 additional years. After 15 long minutes, he decides what's best.

"I choose to hide you from other people." he answers as he sighs. He sets his backpack down and opens the pocket where he keeps his Poke Balls. "Well, here goes nothing..." he says as he picks up a Poke Ball and points it toward Kyurem. The Boundary Pokemon willingly pressed the button with its frozen snout. The Poke Ball opened as red light surrounded Kyurem and drew it inside, after which the Poke Ball closes and the button in the middle stops glowing red. "I hope this is the best course of action." Arti hopes Kyurem is right.

Arti puts the now filled Poke Ball in his right pocket on his shorts, he closes the backpack, picks it up, and decides to lessen the blow done through the decision by enjoying the soothing breeze coming from the ocean a bit longer. While staring at the ocean, out of the corner of his eye, Arti catches a glimpse of a girl walking on the sandy beach.
 
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Chapter 5: The Rising Historian
Arti starts walking toward Undella Town again, but he bumps into the girl that he caught a glimpse of before and the girl falls to the sandy ground. This is his chance to properly socialize with other people, something that Kyurem wants him to do as part of the first trial.

"Oh no! I'm sorry, are you okay?" Arti asks the girl. She gets up and wipes the sand off her dress. Deep down, Arti is actually kind of nervous.

"Don't worry, I'm fine." the girl replies, then she asks "What was that Pokemon that you just caught? I have never seen that one before."

"W-well, this Pokemon's name is Kyurem. I wouldn't consider Kyurem as my Pokemon, more like a friend who happens to be a mentor." Arti replies, doing his best to sound normal.

"That's very nice of you. What is your name?" The girl asks for Arti's name "I'm sorry I didn't ask this earlier."

"My name is Arti, we just started our journey today, my friend has given me a special request to come with." Arti secretly mentions Kyurem. "So, what is your name?" he asks her.

"My name is Mary, I have been looking to uncover the hidden secrets of Unova." Mary responds. "I was on my way back to Undella Town to resume looking at items found in the Abyssal Ruins."

"I'm going to Undella Town right now, do you want to accompany me? I can talk to you about a hidden secret that my friend told me about." Arti offers, finally managing to stop himself from being nervous.

"That sounds wonderful." Mary answers.

Arti and Mary start walking down the sandy path to Undella Town.

"I'm pretty sure you know the history of Unova and the Original Dragon, the Pokemon who had split itself." Arti begins explaining.

"That Pokemon? It's common knowledge that it has existed at one point, but it split into two because of the two heroes' conflict." Mary recalls.

"What if I told you that the Original Dragon actually split into three?" Arti continues with a question. "My friend told me about a husk existing somewhere." He tries to have some fun in helping out Mary uncover this secret.

"Do you imply that there was maybe a husk that was left from the split?" Mary asks "If there was a husk, then historians left that important part out!" She speculates. "The two known Pokemon who were the result of the split are Reshiram and Zekrom. Their names seem to match at the end and you told me that the Pokemon you just caught is named Kyurem, another name where its ending matches that of Reshiram and Zekrom."

"You do bring up a good point for name similarities." Arti agrees.

"So, if Kyurem is the husk of the Original Dragon, that means..." after Mary continues with her analysis, she gasps at the shocking realization. "You have the husk of the Original Dragon! No wonder I have never seen Kyurem before!"

"You are correct! Kyurem has told me of something called the God Stone, whether Kyurem and I will find it is a mystery all on its own." Arti explains the complication of this matter.

"If this is related to ancient texts and languages, I might just decide to accompany you throughout Unova then. I love deciphering and translating them!" Mary gets excited just thinking about them.

As they get closer to Undella Town, Arti tries to start the process of getting more people to know Kyurem better.

"So, do you want to see Kyurem again? I can't show you in Undella Town because the people there will be worried about its presence." Arti explains the current predicament.

"Yes, I do want to see Kyurem again!" Mary excitedly answers.

They decide to stop at the narrow path, both sides having gentle waves caressing the sand. Arti reaches into his right pocket and grabs the Poke Ball containing Kyurem and throws it far behind him so as to give space for the Boundary Pokemon to be released without harming either person. The Poke Ball opens when it lands, filling the space with white light as the air cools again. At the same position of the Poke Ball, Kyurem stands freely again.

"Greetings again Arti, I see you met another human." Kyurem states as it sees Mary beside Arti. "I'm more surprised that this one did not run away. Did you tell her the crucial details that were left out?"

"I let her figure it out once I said your name, she aims to learn Unova's secrets that are hidden away from common knowledge." Arti responds.

"My name is Mary, nice to meet you Kyurem!" Mary introduces herself to the Boundary Pokemon, surprised to see it up close. "Neither of you has seen my Pokemon, it's a great friend to me as well."

She picks up a Poke Ball from her big bag and throws it behind her to give enough space for the Pokemon inside to be released safely. After the white light clears, the Pokemon reveals to be a Golurk.

"Luuurrrk!" the Automaton Pokemon roars out with its deep voice.

"Whoa! I heard these Pokemon are hard to come by these days." Arti says.

"I needed someone to guard ancient locations while I looked for some texts on the walls to decipher." Mary states.

"Ah yes, you're not the usual historian who wants to keep certain historical facts hidden, you're welcome to come with us to Nacrene City anytime." Kyurem speaks to Mary.

"That's where I will go to as well! A museum is the best place to store newly discovered details about a major event that happened long ago after all." Mary responds. "I would love to come with you guys, just let me get ready at Undella Town before we go."

"We can totally wait, speaking about going to Undella Town. I think I should hide Kyurem, the people in Lacunosa Town get paranoid when they see the Pokemon so I don't know how people in Undella Town will react when they see a Pokemon from the Giant Chasm." Arti explains.

"Some people are still afraid of Golurk, they think its body is possessed by a Gengar or something ridiculous like that. They don't know that Golurk is nice." Mary relates.

"Goluuurrr..." Golurk lets out a disappointed cry.

"You and me both, the humans are scared us even though we both mean well." Kyurem speaks to the Automaton Pokemon.

Arti and Mary picked up their Poke Balls and retracted their respective Pokemon back inside them. Now they resume their way to Undella Town.

After journeying further downward, they notice it's getting dark, climbing a short staircase to their left to reach a lush grassland where the leaves and blades of grass are gently blowing toward the same direction as the breeze from the ocean.

"I think we should camp here and wait until morning. We can let our friends sleep outside of their Poke Balls since we're not at a town or city." Arti suggests.

"Trying to find our way in the dark is a bad idea since we don't know what we will encounter." Mary agrees.

Both of them let their friends out of their Poke Balls, setting up sleeping bags as they look at the stars that dot the sky.
 
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"Don't worry, I'm fine." the girl replies, then she asks "What was that Pokemon that you just caught? I have never seen that one before."

"W-well, this Pokemon's name is Kyurem. I wouldn't consider Kyurem as my Pokemon, more like a friend who happens to be a mentor." Arti replies, doing his best to sound normal.
The people in Lacunosa definitely recognised it and got scared, and you write it will worry people in Undella as well. This makes it seem like Kyurem is common knowledge in Unova, so why wouldn't Mary know about it?
 
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The people in Lacunosa definitely recognised it and got scared, and you write it will worry people in Undella as well. This makes it seem like Kyurem is common knowledge in Unova, so why wouldn't Mary know about it?
While Kyurem has worked with humans in the past, it doesn't know how humans from other towns or cities will react to its presence. While Kyurem is an intelligent Pokemon, it doesn't mean it can predict reactions, which is why it chose the safer route just in case.
 
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I meant that everyone except Mary seems to know that Kyurem exists and are scared of it
 
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I meant that everyone except Mary seems to know that Kyurem exists and are scared of it
Only the people from Lacunosa Town know about Kyurem. It just wanted to play it safe because it doesn't know how people from other towns and cities will react to something that for the most part, only Lacunosa Town saw.
 
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Going to be less complete in C4 because my stupid app wiped out half the stuff. Hopefully I remembered most of what I had to say.

C4
- Remember the cardinal rule is to generally show, don't tell. This infodump really doesn't work so well since it seems more made up on the spot, rather than showing all these points in action. Makes it hard to sympathize with Arti between that and him occasionally acting like a power-hungry jerk.
- I wouldn't say that what was going on in town was a matter of Truth vs. Ideals. If anything it was SMT style Law "do what you're told" vs. Chaos "survival of the fittest".
- Well no Kyurem wasn't just used to chase off a bully, there was the whole tournament.
- Nice bit about Ghetsis' Hydreigon. Especially given that his entire team in BW is geared to take on N. So it would make sense he went in looking to deal with Kyurem directly.
- What isn't so nice is that you missed an opportunity earlier to have this come into play during the tournament, given there was a Hydreigon in it that Kyurem actually fought..
- Neat bringing the unused God Stone into the mix.
- I find it amusing that Kyurem casually brings up an upcoming catastrophe to the Unova region, and it goes unmentioned except in passing. In fact what Arti focuses on and seems more worried about is the part about being worthy or not.
- This is some awkward way for a trial to take place. Yes making hard decisions is part of being a hero, but whether or not to capture a Pokemon who clearly doesn't mind? That's stretching it. Then again given the above this kid may not be mentally all there...
- And he just sits there for like 15 minutes. Right after that conversation. If I were the godeity I'd chastise him for having zero resolve.

C5
- And he crashes into her. HOW? He knew she was there. She did do. How did he end up crashing into her?! Did he suddenly go blind? Then again this is supposed to be a test/trial on how to better socially interact. So far I'd give him a failing grade.
- So now we meet Mary the person looking to uncover the secrets of Unova. A person who does not recognize Kyurem on sight or bringing it up and questions why it has joined someone. This instantly establishes her as comically incompetent.
- And she never even heard of it after it was used to freeze a chunk of the region???
- So is the fear of Kyurem only a Lacunosa Town thing? I can fill in the blanks given the story about hiding the God Stone
- So why are Golurk hard to come by?
- A museum is the best place to store newly discovered details about a major event that happened long ago after all. <- She sounds like such a awkwardly speaking dork here and it is almost great.
- Letting their Pokemon sleep outside. Hm. I can see it now.

Billy Bob Cassidy-Williams was on his way to Undella Town, riding atop his trusty Bouffalant. He was an early riser. Dawn had not yet broken, but it would be in about half an hour or so. May as well get an early start to the day.

That's when he saw it. Something large and draconian just snoozing on the side of the road. "WHOA NELLY!" he shouted, louder than he intended. He pulled back the reins to stop his steed, freezing up in terror in realization. He had just shouted. Could that have woken this beast up?

They waited with baited breath for several long moments. Thankfully, it remained still, sleeping quietly. By the gods, he had gotten away with that one. But what was that? He hopped off and tiptoed over. Thankfully he had dabbled in ninja arts as a child, and had not forgotten that training. He squinted, allowing his eyes to adjust to the dark. It became clear to him, that was the legendary Kyurem. Away from its usual home. With a young couple sleeping beside it. What was it doing here?

It took him only a moment to decide. "I don't even wanna know what in the Sam Hell is goin' on here," he remarked under his breath. He looked and saw his Pokemon had followed, good. He hopped upon her. "Let's get goin', Nelly." He clicked for her to keep walking. Once they were far enough away, he clicked again, causing her to trot. He just wanted to forget what he saw and get out of here.

Anyway that drivel I had the sudden urge to write based on how badly their idea could go wrong aside, yeah. It's...progression, at least. Don't know where this is going, but I suppose I'll stay on to see what happens. As much of a mess as this story is at times, not gonna lie, do like some of your ideas even if they're not being executed the best.
 
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Chapter 6: The Suspicious Businessman

The direct light on their eyes urges Arti and Mary to wake up.

"Greetings" Kyurem say to Arti and Mary.

"Goluuurrr" Golurk speaks to the two.

"Golurk says 'Good Morning' to both of you." Kyurem translates what Golurk has said.

"Good morning everyone." Arti and Mary say separately.

"Shall we finish our walk to Undella Town?" Kyurem asks the humans of the group.

"Let's do it! Once we get there, we will see what we can get for breakfast." Arti mentions.

"I am kind of hungry." Mary says.

"Do not worry about us." Kyurem assures Arti and Mary. "Golurk and I generate our own energy."

Arti and Mary retracted their Pokemon and resumed their walk to Undella Town, the wind gently touching their faces. Upon reaching the transition gate, they see a shady businessman talking to a few employees of his company about the new way of generating energy by rubbing tectonic plates together. Arti and Mary's bodies tense up as they feel their hearts pounding in their chests, could these be the suspicious group that Kyurem told Arti about? Something about this just doesn't sit right.

"Everything can be recovered, even forests and historical sites. The more pressure we put on the tectonic plates toward each other, the more energy is generated." The mysterious businessman claims.

"What?" Arti whispered. "Is this guy crazy or did I not notice something here?"

"I doubt what he says is going to work." Mary whispered back.

Just then, the businessman and his employees caught wind of their whispers.

"Hello strangers, my name is Colton." the businessman introduces himself in a rather calm mood as he puts his hands behind his back, his footsteps coming ever closer to them. "Now if you don't mind, just get out of our way." Colton warns Arti and Mary. "We don't like teenagers who eavesdrop on us while we have a serious adult conversation." Colton's serious tone pierces through their ears. Arti caught a glimpse of Colton's gold-encrusted teeth.

"Well, I'm sorry sir." Arti paralyzes on the spot, like he was hit with an invisible Thunder Wave.

"I'm sorry too, I hope we didn't interrupt anything important." Mary felt her body heat rising.

The two teens hurried to Undella Town so as to not get involved with these suspicious people any further, but is this the end of their encounter with these people?

"Who are those guys? Isn't high pressure on the tectonic plates really dangerous?" the thought swirls through Arti's mind.

The fear just could not be contained as sand clung on their footwear much like a Joltik does to an Electric-type Pokemon.

They took their time before arriving, gulping the air through mouths as they calm down. Before long, they arrive at what looks like a villa.

"Whoa, I didn't you owned a villa! I heard those things are really expensive." Arti looks at Mary's villa.

"Actually, my dad owns this villa, he likes a clear view of the ocean. I'm lucky that the Abyssal Ruins is close, which means I can dive to take a look without going far." Mary responds. "Come inside, we can talk more about our journeys safely."

"Are you sure you want me to come inside? We only met one day ago." Arti asks, confused about Mary's invitation.

"It's the least I can do for letting me see Kyurem and allowing me to figure out one of the missing pieces of Unova's history." Mary warmly replies. "I only ask you to not touch anything historical or valuable."

"If you insist on inviting me in, at least I can look into the God Stone's location privately." Arti aims to respect Kyurem's wish.

Mary unlocks the door and opens it, revealing the inside of the villa. This is unlike anything Arti has seen before, a fancy place with a quartz-encrusted chandelier, a huge living room and more.

"I'm going to look for the tablet and other supplies. It will take me 5 minutes. Feel free to watch some TV while I look for my stuff." Mary heads upstairs.

"I can wait as long as you need me to wait." Arti responds. He turns on the TV, looking for a news channel. "If Kyurem wants me to resolve conflicts in these cities, the news is a great source on which cities need help." Arti thinks. He found one that's already later in its runtime, but it doesn't hurt to see what comes next.

"...felt like the ferris wheel at Nimbasa City had to be closed down for the time being." The news reporter finishes a previous news segment. "For our next story, the tensions in Black City only build up. How long has it been since this conflict started, Dave?"

The camera cuts to a fairly young-looking newsman.

"This conflict at Black City has been happening for a week now. It has gotten worse as the people claiming they are from a place called 'White Forest' are dissatisfied with Black City's smog and want the entire city to be demolished. This is happening while the Black City residents are fighting back, saying that they like it just the way it is. This situation will only get uglier as time goes on." Dave gives a serious look at the camera.

The camera cuts back to the news reporter.

"There you have it, folks. What started as harmless disagreements erupted into a full-scale verbal conflict, will they reach a compromise? To make matters worse, two wild Ralts were reportedly seen in Black City, we can only hope they won't get involved in this situation." The news reporter says in a serious tone.

Heavy-hearted, Arti turns off the TV to assess the situation that he's going to encounter.

"What will satisfy both sides? What about those poor Ralts?" the thoughts scatter around in his mind.

Not long after, footsteps clapped on the wood behind Arti.

"I have everything ready to go. However, I think we should eat something before we go." Mary suggests.

"That's a good idea, we would be able to focus more on the path through Route 14." Arti agrees.

"I will join you in a second, I want to take in this view before we go." Mary tells Arti.

While Mary looked through a window at the front of the villa before she and Arti went to get breakfast, the mist in the distance enters her vision.
 
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- No punctuation in the quotes at some of the beginning points
- Mary."We <- Missing space
- Very strange narration, with it asking a NEXT TIME ON DRAGON BALL Z question right near the beginning too.
- Quake Industries Inc., which is my official nickname for it until it is officially named, sounds like they're spouting a bunch of hootenanny for some secret cult-related purpose. Like pressing plates for harnessing energy I can see. But how does that help for reclaiming land?
- This guy couldn't fly a villain flag more obviously if he was covered head to toe in villainous bodywear.
- Why does Arti leap to the conclusion that the villa is Mary's? Besides being Arti.
- Well you are normally admittedly very miss, but I do like Mary's dialogue here. It feels pretty natural, and just a bit ladylike.
- This is the strangest mashup of Black City and White Forest I've seen. In a good way. Kind of something I want to see explored further, though I assume it might be.
- But is that a cliffhanger ending with the mist entering her vision? We shall see, I suppose.

Short one, not much to say here. Just keeps moving along.
 
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Chapter 7: Clouded Emotions

After being done with breakfast, Arti and Mary pack up, leave the villa and head for Route 14. Not worried about the sand clinging to their footwear and the wind blowing their hair back, they have a discussion about what they will do once they get to Black City.

"Black City is in a sticky situation right now. I need to help them, but I'm not sure how long it will take to come up with a middle ground, or if I can come up with one in the first place." Arti begins.

"Wait, the conflict in Black City is escalating? I thought they had some disagreements." Mary responds with confusion.

"With how bad things are right now, we need to get there before their situation gets even worse." Arti explains.

As they head south, their minds brought something to their attention.

"Oh, we forgot to send out our Pokemon!" Arti realizes.

Once they know they are far enough away from Undella Town and a long way into Route 14 where the sea still gives out its distant roar. They stop at the corner where the waves meet the sand and open their Poke Balls, intense light shining right in front of them. There stood Kyurem and Golurk once more.

The four resume the walk toward Black City.

"I see you are making good progress based on where you are, did you find out one of the cities that are in conflict?" Kyurem asks Arti seriously.

"Yup, Black City is one of them. What challenges lie ahead?" Arti wonders.

"I will tell you the challenges when you are closer to Black City, for now, you must get there." Kyurem states.

While Arti is talking to Kyurem, Mary's sight is magnetized toward Arti, seemingly stuck there.

"Goluuur lurrk lurk gol." Golurk speaks to Mary.

"Golurk is saying 'I can sense your feelings about Arti.', is there a secret you're hiding from us?" Kyurem translated and then asked Mary.

Mary's cheeks became a little bit pink. Is it the summer heat doing this or is it something else?

This gave a shock to Arti, he could feel some sort of beating in his chest, "What?!" is the first thing that comes into his mind. "Well, dating definitely wasn't in the plan for this journey. Now that I think about it more, I did feel like someone was staring at me the day I met her." he thinks again. "Whatever this is, I think I'm starting to like her more than a friend, but I don't know how to say that without her thinking I'm being awkward." Arti admits in his thoughts. He looks at Mary and then at Kyurem, wondering what Kyurem said is true.

"Uh... let's focus on the goal!" Mary tries to end this conversation early.

"Okay?" Arti's mind tries to fit the mental puzzle pieces together, but it's having trouble doing so.

As the quartet eventually arrive at the end of the sandy path and climb the cliff's steps to the lush, green, and tiny blades under their feet, their visions began to blur, barely making out vague shapes of trees in the distance.

"Is Route 14 always foggy? This doesn't seem very safe." Arti is first to be concerned about the group's safety.

"If we stick to the straight-forward path, we should be fine." Mary replies.

The quartet arrives at the first bridge in front of them, flowing water runs under it like a group of Water-type Pokemon sprinting and filtering through the rocks that peek out from below.

"Well, I don't think a wooden bridge will be able to support our combined weight." Arti mentions.

"Then should we cross with the Pokemon in their Poke Balls?" Mary asks.

"Goluuurrk luurk." Golurk responds.

"I agree with Golurk, placing us inside the Poke Balls will allow you two to cross the bridge without the risk of it breaking." Kyurem concurs with Golurk's answer.

With that, Arti and Mary retracted their Pokemon back and began to cross the first wooden bridge in front of them, careful not to step on cracked or flimsy planks. Each step produced a loud creaking sound, furthering their worries of the bridge falling.

However, Arti began feeling something he hasn't felt. Was this... feelings for someone else?

"So... what was the feeling you have for- I mean towards me?" Arti asks Mary, nervously wondering about what she thought about him earlier.

"Well, it's like... it's hard to explain." Mary answers nervously too. "I just thought that you're...cute?", as soon as she said that, her cheeks became pinker, then thought to herself "Ugh! Why did I have to say that immediately? Now he's going to think I'm weird!"

"Well, I didn't think I would hear that from a girl whom I met only yesterday. Um, oh boy, I don't know how to respond to that." Arti confusingly replies in his mind, seemingly out of words to say at that current moment. A few seconds later, he does confess something to Mary. "Well, uh... I kind of want to be with you? I don't know how to word this better. I think... you're cute too.", in his mind, Arti questions his word choice, "Seriously? Why did I have to be dumb enough to say that?! I don't want her to think I'm being weird or something."

An awkward silence settles between them as they finish crossing the first bridge onto a thin body of land as two oak trees appear into view. Arti then decides to break the silence to change the subject as he and Mary approach the second bridge.

"Do you regularly visit the Nacrene Museum?" Arti asks.

"All the time, I once read a book from its library where it shows different versions of ancient texts and describes the cultures associated with those texts in detail." Mary answers. "What do you like to do?"

"I watch Pokemon battles on TV, have you seen a trainer defeating Iris a few years ago? It's still crazy to believe that one of the Pokemon that appeared there is my mentor now." Arti states. "I also enjoy watching documentaries on wild Pokemon behavior, this is like an insight of one of the things to expect on a journey."

They begin stepping on the second bridge, each step wobbles the bridge, with its planks' corner barely dipping into the river below. This bridge is noticeably shorter than the first one, arriving at a bigger piece of land with more trees to the left and a rocky wall to the far right.

"So, how did you meet Golurk? Anything that went down that day?" Arti wonders out loud.

"I met Golurk in Dragonspiral Tower when I was looking for anything hidden that wasn't recorded in history yet, then I see Golurk trying to defend itself from other wild Pokemon. I don't know what caused the other wild Pokemon to attack it all of a sudden, but I quickly used my Poke Ball to prevent it from getting attacked further. Since then, Golurk has protected me from Cofagrigus whenever I was exploring the Relic Castle for answers." Mary tells her story. "Now that told you my story, can you tell me how you met Kyurem?"

"I was exploring the Giant Chasm for the fun of it and decided to go deeper, once I have heard a voice and seen a pair of lights in the dark approach me, I ran for my life. After hurting my knee, I couldn't get up in time and noticed that those lights belonged to Kyurem. I was surprised that Kyurem wanted to join me, probably to get stronger, but I don't know what it is I need to do to make Kyurem stronger aside from getting the stones that it talked about. I thought it would join someone more capable until I heard the reasoning that I go against the extremes of both sides. Honestly, I'm just thankful for this opportunity to have a journey, despite the difficulties that I will encounter. The town that I'm from doesn't let anybody living there leave freely, I hear it's for safety or whatever." Arti tells his story.

The two eventually arrive at the third and final bridge, the first step taken by Mary breaks a wooden plank on the bridge, Arti acts just in time to grab Mary by her hand and pull her away so she wouldn't hurt her leg and possibly get splinters from the next wooden plank, or possibly fall into the running water below. The good thing is that this bridge is as short as the second bridge.

"Whoa! Careful there, wouldn't want you to fall into the river and taken away by the currents." Arti says.

"Thank you for helping me avoid getting possible splinters." Mary is grateful.

"No problem, let's be careful when crossing this particular bridge." Arti warns as he carefully steps over the gap so as to not break the other planks.

The two eventually make it across, they notice the oaks got closer and a forest of them are on their left. More importantly, they notice the big staircase on their right that leads to the top of the hill, where two shorter staircases ascend to the elevation where the transition gate to Black City is located. Arti and Mary take a short break after a long walk and they sit under the same tree as to not lose each other in this fog, they also decide that it's a good time to send out their Pokemon so they get their Poke Balls and open them, making bright light flash, with Kyurem and Golurk now standing in front of them.

"I can sense your curiosity about the difficulty of the challenges that you will face in there." Kyurem tells Arti. "It's going to take more than one day to resolve what is going on in Black City. How many days this will take is unknown, so you must have some patience to overcome this set of challenges. The rest is up to you to figure out."

"Well, okay..." Arti has some doubts about whether he will be able to solve Black City's problem or not.

"Don't worry, we will support you when you need it." Mary comforts Arti.

"Goluur lurk lurrrk!" Golurk tells Arti.

"Golurk says 'I believe in you!'" Kyurem translates then says "Keep in mind that I see your potential as a hero. Even when the situation gets dire, you must never give up."

"Thanks, guys. I will never give up on this now, no matter how hard this gets!" Arti says with confidence.

After the short rest, Arti and Mary get up and start making their way to the top, up the first and longest staircase, but not before retrieving their Pokemon. To get their mind off the long climb, they stare at the lush landscape filled with plant life at every corner, although, still with blurred vision.

"This is the final climb before finally arriving at Black City." Arti tries to keep going.

After the two make it to the top, they notice two shorter staircases, one closer to Arti and Mary and the other leading to a transition gate. They stop to take gulps of air before pressing onward.

"We can make it, I know we can!" Mary gives some encouragement.

Tall grass and some trees appear on their right, with the transition to a waterfall behind the oak trunks. The two climb the staircase in front of them in a hurry, arriving at a linear trail with tall grass lining its sides.

"Just one more and we finally arrived." Arti tries to keep his spirits up.

Distant yelling could be heard from the transition gate, growing closer as the duo approaches. Sprinting toward the final staircase and climbing it, the duo finally reach the top, where trees are seen at the front and finally the transition gate at the left. They take one gulp of air before going in, where the yells are the loudest.
 
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- But windswept hair feels good! At least to me!
- Man Mary's line there about Black City's disagreements either reads so unnaturally or that she may be so much of an "informational" person she forgets the "practical"
- Just a couple kids walking with supermassive Pokemon.
- And I can see these two supermassive Pokemon have absolutely no respect for internal feelings.
- Arti's thoughts on the matter are a bit confusing, since until the paragraph finishes it seems like he's saying those thoughts out aloud.
- Well, one thing I will say. It is pretty realistic for teenagers to just get attracted to each other for little reason. So that's strangely realistic, despite how they've only spent a bit of time together.
- That is an incredibly bizarre metaphor to use for fast running water. Unless the Water type is Vaporeon, which is just water.
- Yes, just being attracted based on looks is a real thing for teenagers! Though that said, this exchange while adorable is kinda confusing as before, but now even moreso because it's hard to tell what's being spoken and what's being thought.
- I kind of want to be with you? <- Just. Adorable.
- What a poorly maintained set of bridges.
- I can't decide if their exchange after the plank breaks is awkwardly written or if it's good because it is awkwardly written. Can see both as the type to use such awkward phrasing.
- the oaks got closer and a forest of them <- This is just plain awkward.
- 'Blurred vision' being used makes me think he's like lightheaded or something. Similarly, there was no hint of the walk being strenuous.
- You use "gulp of air" twice in short succession. Kind of strange phrasing too.

Plot progress. Relationship progress! Interested in seeing if you pull the trigger early on the latter, like absolutely nothing does that and makes the relationship the end goal. Seems we're getting into the main part of this episodic-ish story next time, so let's see what goes down!
 
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