The Pokemon Boarding School

[alster08]

Havent been on Bulbagarden in a while. But I still managed to write some stories and I beleive this one was the perfect one for me!

This Fanfiction is about Pokemon trainers who are forced by there parents to go to a Pokemon Boarding School where they will learn about Pokemon from around the world and even battling techniques but while on feildtrips or off campus other crazy things may happen.




The Pokemon Boarding School

Part 1 Prolougue
Chapter 1 Welcome to The International Pokemon Boarding School
Chapter 2 ????????????
Chapter 3 ????????????

 

[alster08]

Chapter 1 Welcome to The International Pokemon Boarding School​

The weather was perfect; the winds were blowing, it was about a little over 75 degree’s Fahrenheit, and the sun was shinning. The waves crashed against the beach, inserting the perfect sound for the outside. The cool breeze left a delightful aroma, suitable for all sorts of moments. Everything was perfect except for thousands of Pokemon Middle Schooler’s were in the car driving countless miles to “The International Pokemon Boarding School.” It wasn’t so bad for many; but for Erik; it was nightmares alive. His biggest dream in life was to grow up; big and strong; leaving his home to venture on a long quest around the world. It wasn’t the case this time, he was forced into a boarding school by his parents who honestly thought the exact opposite.

“Mom and dad, I don’t want to do this. I want to be like the other Pokemon Trainers that set out on a journey throughout the region battling gym leaders. I don’t want to go to a school where they teach us, boring, useless, unnecessary lessons,” cried Erik Johnson. His parents didn’t feel up to the conversation because they at least had it a hundred times. They were more concentrated on the long endless rode.

Erik knew arguing would get him no where. For the next 7 years, he would be an attendant of the boarding school. He slouched down in the back seat, obviously in a bad mood. Right next to him laid Trurtwig in the same slouching position as Erik. Turtwig was Erik’s Pokemon, his first in fact. They always did things together as a team. Through the thick and thin, they always knew that with each other; nothing could bring them down.

The car ride was close to being over, still filled with silence. The massive boarding school was in site. Erik was amazed at the sight. It looked like it was made with gold. It was painted a shiny slick gold color, a red luminous roof helped stand it out, and what was most amazing was the statue of this mysterious Pokemon that Erik was unfamiliar with was standing on top of the roof. This helped Erik picture that it wasn’t the end of the world, that things may go great here.

“Wow its huge. I can’t believe this is where ill be living,” shouted Erik; while his parents drove into the parking lot. Turtwig even had a shiny look on his face. Turtwig thought of all the Pokemon he could meet and all the wonders inside the immense building. There parents had a faint smile on. They were minute away from giving up there child for a year to explore hid education in an boarding school.

Erik hoped out of the car, to get a front row view of the glamorous sight. The outside may have looked perfect but it was the inside that was soon to knock Erik to his knee’s. “I cant believe this is my home.”

Erik’s mother asked, “Erik, please get your belongings from the trunk please. Its time to explore your new home. This is where your true journey awaits.” Erik wasn’t so upset about no being able to venture the world. Instead, he’s now able to adventure in the school; with a verity of different people, he’s guaranteed to make dozens of friends.

The first stop was to locate is his dorm, located on the 2nd floor, number 213. Erik pushed through the doors to be stunned by how perfect the inside looked. Everything impressed Erik, from the lights; to the thousands of lockers. Thousands of students were exploring campus and half of them were lost, which is pretty easy considering its one of the regions biggest buildings known to man.

Erik joined the crowd, running and turning, hoping for the best. There must have been hundreds of hallways because Erik ended up where he had started. His parents seemed to have vanished, probably searching for the room as well. Erik gave up trying to search for it without directions. He did this by simply looking at his class information to find out that his dorm was in the Legendary Hallway. Several of signs were all across the Halls notifying where each and every hallway was. Erik followed the signs that led all the way to room 213 not only to find his parents but two other students expecting him to come.

One his roommates was tall; much taller than Erik. He had thick spiky hair that fell over part of his forehead. His clothing consisted of a black jacket right over a golden yellow shirt. His pants were entirely black, matching with his black shoes. The other roommate right beside of him had a similar hair cut but just a tad bit shorter. His shirt was pretty simple consisting of the colors of a Pokeball. He also had on black skinny jeans and wore a hat resembling a Pikachu. They were a first good impression to Erik who assumed they would be easy to get along with.

Erik wanted to give the best first impression as possible so he greeted them by sating, “Hey guys. Looks like we are going to be roommates this year.” The two roommates nodded and then finally Erik asked, “So what’s you guy’s name?”

The taller roommate decided to speak first. “Oh yeah, my name is Kyo. I come from Canalave City.” Canalave city was quite a distance because the boarding school is all the way east to Veilstone City.

Then the second roommate introduced himself. “Oh hey, my name is Talik. I don’t live to far from here in Eterna City. And you must be?”

“Im Paul. And I can’t wait to start this year. I drove here from Sunnyshore,” replied Paul. Not only did Paul and his roommates greet each other but there Pokemon did the same. Turtwig rushed over to Kyo’s Piplup and Talik’s Chimchar. The three Pokemon seemed to get along perfectly; they already began playing games and hopping from bed to bed.

“Paul, honey, its time for us to go,” cried his mother slowly releasing the tears.

“Its ok mom. Remember I come home every summer and then return. Ill write you letters all the time and I heard we can video chat from this school. Ill miss you so much but I guess its time to leave each other for now,” explained Paul, grasping his father and mother in a big bear hug. Paul gave his last farewell wave and his parents left the room speechless.

“Well guys. Im going to explore the campus. How about you guys tag along,” asked Erik, ready to set foot on campus, parent free. Kyo and Talik agreed to accompany Erik, exploring the riches of “The International Pokemon Boarding School. Right outside there dorm was hundreds of students that couldn’t find there way and were obviously too stubborn to use the map given. The three roommate of Room 213 joined the crowed.

The first thing they noticed was the bathrooms. Kyo was a big freak on clean and orderly restrooms. They agreed to check them out because they would most likely be there every morning. When they first walked in they were surprised by the delightful fragrance. The stalls were perfectly clean with no writing and there was plenty of showers for everyone in the Legendary Hall. The walls were painted perfectly a lime green color. Erik, Kyo, and Talik all came to a conclusion that the restroom was perfect for now at least.

The Legendary Hallway came to an end. The next hallway was called the Great Hall because all the educational classes for the 8th Grade were there. That hallway was where more than half of Erik’s, Kyo’s, and Talik’s classes were going to be located. After a couple minutes The Great Hall bored them and they decided to move to the next room on there path; The Pokemon Training Arena. The sign on the door made all three of them stare. They couldn’t believe there eyes. The boarding school was now officially perfect to them at least. Even there three Pokemon knew what was held behind that door and were definitely excited.

The first sight that popped up when they rushed through the special door was the various students training against each other like there was no tomorrow. The arena appeared as if it took up basically one forth of the school. It had enough room for literately 100 practice battles to go on. Erik didn’t waist anytime as he sprinted to one of the fields hoping for an even match.

A girl who appeared the same age as Erik approached and requested a battle. She had long, beautiful hair that she definitely cared for 24/7. She wore a black t-shirt with a large yellow strip straight through the middle. She also wore black, shorts that were a little above her knee’s. By the look on Erik’s face anyone could make a first guess that Erik already had a massive crush on her. Of course he did not deny the request.

“So are we going to battle or what,” asked the girl.

Erik finally responded in his high pitch voice, “ITS ON!”

 

[Cabaret]

This is actually a really good first chapter. Usually introductons to bording school type fics are lingering and dull.

At first when I read the description, I was a little puzzled as to why parents would be forcing their child to attend a pokemon bording school. And in the story I was also puzzled as to why Erik wouldn't want to go to a pokemon bording school, because that sounds awesome. Then I realized that it's much cooler to go on a journey then attend a school, for seven years.

There were a few grammatical mistakes, and there were a few phrases where you would think there would be a exclaimation point (but alas, there wasn't.) The pacing was a tad fast, but seeing that you probably want to get the story going, it's understandable.

I'll read the next chapter. It'll be interesting to see how you set it apart from other fics that deal with pokemon schools and the such.

 

[LibraSnakes13]

There are usually two concepts of pokemon fanfiction that are quite banal. The first one is the typical journey fic for a trainer while the second one is a Pokemon Academy.
As such, when writing fics like these it's important to stand out from the crowd. You must be different and original if you want to keep your readers interested.

One of the things that can hinder you from this is bad grammar. There are many grammar mistakes in this passage that make me believe it wasn't proofread very well.

A lot of them are just simple spelling mistakes:
"rode" should be "road"
"Trutwig" should be "Turtwig"

Others involve mistakes with apostrophes. Ex:
"ill" should be "I'll"
"Wow its huge." should be "Wow, it's huge."
"...but it was the inside that was soon to knock Erik to his knee’s..." should be "knees"
"Im" should be "I'm"

Some of the sentences also sound awkward as well. The simple spelling mistakes I said earlier also distract the reader as well such as this:
"The three roommate of Room 213 joined the crowed" should be "The three ROOMATES of Room 213 joined the CROWD"

Semicolon use is a bit fuzzy. For a humorous but helpful tidbit on how to use semicolons, check out this link: How to use a semicolon - The Oatmeal

Other than that this story seems somewhat run of the mill. If you proofread the grammar and make it more original then it will be good. Keep at it.

 

[alster08]

Thanks guys! I really appriciate the feedback. I will correct my grammer mistakes as soon as possible! I should have Chapter 2 done within a couple days! Hhahaha I cant wait for this story to take offf!