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The sound of your voice?

InfiniteBakuphoon

battered, but not broken, bakuphoon
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A bit of a weird one here, perhaps, but I’m curious to hear a little bit from you guys about this. Basically, how do you feel whenever you hear the sound of your own voice?

In my experience, at least, how I think my voice sounds and how it actually sounds when it’s, say, played back on a recording of some sort, is quite the exercise in dissonance… that is to say, I don’t sound anything in reality like how I sound in my own mind! And in all honesty, I can’t say that I particularly like my “real” voice that much. It leans towards the nasal side of things more often than not, which, among other things, often makes me feel like my voice is weak or sounds funny. And that, in turn, makes me fear that I wouldn’t be taken seriously if, say, I were to make a speech about something important, or even if I were to just talk amongst regular people about random things. Needless to say, this is something of a big insecurity of mine; one that I’ve had since childhood that hasn’t really improved that much even in my adult life. And that’s frustrating because during the above occasions, I know that what I have to say is worthwhile and that I should have confidence in myself and my words, but I don’t always feellike that’s true whenever I actually hear myself speak with my voice.

Meanwhile, I’ve found that my voice also sometimes doesn’t necessarily “fit” what some people might expect from my gender (so it’s basically either too low or too high; take your pick). This has caught me some flak from either people who can’t handle that (not as many as you’d think, but they exist) or from people ostensibly trying to protect me from people who can’t handle that (my parents, often). The latter have suggested on multiple occasions that I try to alter my voice towards a more traditional-sounding direction in order to present myself better as my gender, the obvious implication being that my voice isn’t “X” enough for said gender. And that’s something that has often made me feel uncomfortable because it kind of feels like I’m violating my “true self” whenever I’m pressured to do things like that, despite the fact that I don’t even like how the voice of my “true self” sounds in the first place (funny how that works, huh?).

Now apparently, I’m not the only one who’s experienced something like this. As far as people I know personally, my parents have expressed similar feelings with their own voices. Not necessarily the dissatisfaction or insecurity, mind, but certainly the feeling that their voices don’t sound like how they expected them to sound. Which makes me wonder: is this a common thing that people feel, or is it a special, unusual kind of thing exclusive to a select few? And to those who do experience that kind of dissonance with your voice, how does it make you feel? Do you actually like the sound of your own voice as it is in reality, or does it dissatisfy you compared to what you think your voice sounds like, or what it sounds like to you in your head?
 

takoyaki

「今、叶わないことのない」
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I really dislike my voice.

I wish it was less deep and more feminine sounding. When talking with certain people I feel like I tend to pitch it up higher.

I have absolutely no idea as to how I could, but I really do wish that I could make my voice much higher (or at least feminine-sounding). It's one of the things I dislike most about myself...
 
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Insanish Danish

oh wow, sports
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I despise my voice; I always have ever since I was a little kid. I've never been made fun of for it or anything, but I've always been very self-conscious about it. I think it sounds worse recorded than when I just hear myself talking, but either way I've always wished I sounded different.
 

ToxicWhiskers

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I have a somewhat deep-ish voice that can get high pitched when I get excited or annoyed. But I can't stand hearing recordings of myself as I sound like an arrogant pre-teen boy with a permanent cold.
 
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Emmy

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In my experience, at least, how I think my voice sounds and how it actually sounds when it’s, say, played back on a recording of some sort, is quite the exercise in dissonance… that is to say, I don’t sound anything in reality like how I sound in my own mind!
The reason for this is you primarily hear your own voice via bone conduction rather than air conduction and the acoustics in your skull inadvertently lower the frequency of what you perceive as your voice so when you hear it played back through a recording device as everyone else hears it you only have the air conduction part in isolation and that leads to the feeling of "wrongness".
 

Aulos

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I despise my voice. So much so that even if after many recordings, I could not get myself to submit a voice recording for the BulbaGarden Holiday Greeting video. :cry:
 

CuboneKing

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My voice is pretty deep, I’ve been told it’s rich and calming and that I should be on the radio or read audiobooks or something. Idk about all that but it’s nice to hear lmao. When I get distressed or excited it can get a little higher pitched, kinda nasally, and yelp-y and I don’t love that. I’ve gradually come to hate it less in recordings which is a good thing considering I’m a musician lmao. I sing and rap, my pitch isn’t always on point but after a little production magic it actually sounds pretty damn good so ¯\(ツ)
 

ii kanji

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I love how almost everyone hates their voice lmao :bulbaWave: Please add me to that club. My natural voice is all high and squeaky and emotional (think genki girl, eww) so at work I have a fake voice which is intentionally deeper and slower and I’m sure it makes people take me more seriously. But all this acting is such hard work…
 

Insanish Danish

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I love how almost everyone hates their voice lmao :bulbaWave: Please add me to that club. My natural voice is all high and squeaky and emotional (think genki girl, eww) so at work I have a fake voice which is intentionally deeper and slower and I’m sure it makes people take me more seriously. But all this acting is such hard work…
I'm the opposite! My voice is deep - not, like, super super deep but deeper than I'd like it to be - and I intentionally pitch it higher when talking to people I don't know very well. Who knows, maybe I'd still hate my voice if the opposite were true lol
 

Orchid

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I'm also not the biggest fan of my own voice, but honestly, is anyone? :р

I think people are sometimes surprised by how deep my voice is, since it's pretty low-pitched and I don't really look like the type to sound that way. I also speak in a really flat and dull monotone most of the time, but if I'm comfortable or talking to people that I like, it can kind of go all over the place (mostly because I exaggerate it as a joke a lot lol).

Friends mostly just tell me I have a habit of pronouncing some words in a weird way, which is true... but I do wonder how much of that is just a regional accent slipping through, since nobody else really seems to notice. :wynaut:
 

R1ke

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I kinda like my voice. Except when I’m listening to recordings of it lol.

I basically have two accents. My ‘default’ one sounds Australian and is more higher pitched, whereas my secondary one is my Indian one and is deeper. But it varies a lot based on how I’m speaking. It’s kinda fun switching between them on the fly, it always surprises other people haha. Like I just instinctively switch if I’m with a friend but my mum calls me.
 

Plaid

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I've had vocal cord dysfunction ever since I was really young. So not only is it physically challenging to speak, but I have a flat, raspy, chainsmoker-esque voice. Being made fun of, scolded by adults for not being able to talk loudly, and asked if I'm sick all the time by other kids has landed me pretty firmly in the "I hate my voice" club — even now as an adult, it's still one of the things about myself that I can't help feeling insecure over, and it's wound up shaping a huge chunk of my life. I attended speech therapy sessions for a bit in high school, but they haven't helped in the long run. I can't stand hearing recordings of my own voice and have to psyche myself up to talk on the phone... heh.
 

Arylett Charnoa

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I am rather ambivalent about it. Whenever I speak, I feel like a stupid idiot, so hearing it back is sometimes better than I expect. And sometimes, it's just as cringy as I think it is. It is rather high-pitched and teenaged sounding, in spite of me almost being 30 years old.

What bothers me more than the sound of my voice is the way I speak, honestly. In text, I am far more eloquent, but when I open my mouth... well, I have trouble thinking of what words to say on the spot. So in addition to sounding like that, I also say a lot of nonsensical or crude things because I default to either made up or curse words. It is an ungodly combination that causes me to feel like a dumbass 90% of the time.
 

Neo Blaze

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I don't mind the voice of my own voice as I tend to hear it myself. When it comes to hearing my voice in recordings however, oh god the cringe :confused: I really hate how I apparently sound to others, but on the other hand I'm not super self-conscious about it. It is what it is.
 

Lightning Flame Blast

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My voice sounds like a smooth baritone to me, but when listening to a recording it’s muted and nasally. Needless to say, I hate getting recorded.
 

RexMissingno

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Since I started T I've felt a lot more comfortable in my voice - especially since I've passed the point where its stopped cracking. Although hearing it played back feels awkward and I always feel like I sound a bit like I'm being forced to talk, at least with speaking it's fine to me and no longer as uncomfortable as it was when I was younger.
 

Blanc

▽ Part-time Subway Master ▲
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Where to begin… my voice has netted me all kinds of comments, from nice to not so nice. I’m really self conscious about it, to the point that I’ll actually try to lower my tone so I sound more ‘normal’, especially when I’m on an important ‘adulting’ phone call. I resent it, but sometimes people don’t say a word about it, which really means a lot to me.

I don’t entirely hate it though, if only because sometimes my pitch improves the delivery of a joke or a swear to my friends, and sometimes I do use that to make comedic moments more fun. I do hope to get more comfortable with it in general, it’s one thing about myself I’m just not happy with…

But I think that’s pretty normal for all of us, right?
 
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