Maybe Wednesday
~green~
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2008
- Messages
- 396
- Reaction score
- 0
- Thread starter
- #21
Oh? Thanks, BjP. I haven't read that one, but I want to. (Well, I want to read them all, but...)
-
Hey Trainers! Be sure to check out Corsola Beach, our newest section on the forums, in partnership with our friends at Corsola Cove! At the Beach, you can discuss the competitive side of the games, post your favorite Pokemon memes, and connect with other Pokemon creators!
-
Due to the recent changes with Twitter's API, it is no longer possible for Bulbagarden forum users to login via their Twitter account. If you signed up to Bulbagarden via Twitter and do not have another way to login, please contact us here with your Twitter username so that we can get you sorted.
Why Fire Red stinks (Game, Comedy)
- Thread starter Maybe Wednesday
- Start date
xXPorygonXx
New Member
- Joined
- Jan 26, 2009
- Messages
- 3
- Reaction score
- 0
Very interesting. I've never seen a fic in this style before. It's very well thought out.
The satirical humor is the best part. You're obviously not going for grammar or diction. Your use of humor makes up for the lack of grammar/diction.
Looking forward to more chapters.
The satirical humor is the best part. You're obviously not going for grammar or diction. Your use of humor makes up for the lack of grammar/diction.
Looking forward to more chapters.
Maybe Wednesday
~green~
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2008
- Messages
- 396
- Reaction score
- 0
- Thread starter
- #24
Real small chapter, sorry!
Another boring journey later...
I heal my Charmander, going through the same Nurse Joy spiel all over again.
Now I’ve got some PokéBalls, let’s go get me a Spearow!
West we go again!
Aw, crud. It’s Brown.
Yeah, hi.
Pokémon League? What’s that? I should forget it?
He wants me to get memory loss like him and his grandpa! No! I shall resist!
Badges? What are badges, and why won’t the guard let me through without them?
Yes, my Pokémon did get stronger! Of course they did!
Ooh, a battle!
Rival Brown would like to battle! Duh...
OMG his turtle mutated into a Pidgey! No, hang on. It’s just a different Pokémon.
It’s a higher level than me, but Ember it anyway.
Aw, snap! It got a critical hit!
Now...it is time. Use the Potion!
Use on which Pokémon?
...
What are you on? There’s only Charmander!
*glug glug*
*burp*
Whee! Now Ember again!
My turn for a critical hit!
It chucked sand at Charmander, and now it can’t see properly!
Charmander, for some reason, doesn’t have the presence of mind to wipe it out.
Moron. Just Ember one more time. Gotcha! Pidgey dies!
Well...faints. Same diff.
It’s a level up, and more stupid numbers! The Speed number is pretty big...
Uh-oh. The turtle wants another hug.
Scratch it! Ember won’t work...for some reason.
I mean, it’s not like it’s actual water, right? Just a...hugging turtle.
I missed! And it Tackled Charmander again!
Scratch missed again! Use Growl!
Ah, so that’s what that attack does.
Better use another Potion.
Scratch!
Ooh, it Tail Whipped me. Somehow. With that stubby little tail.
Now it’s a ScratchTackle fest.
Whoa, it critical hit on Charmander! Down to 2 HP.
Time for...dun dun dun... the last Potion!
This is fun... the salamander killed the bird, and now it’s about to kill the turtle.
I hope.
Arceus, this battle is boring.
Charmander keeps missing. Must be all that sand.
Both Pokémon in the red...Scratch. If it misses, I’m toast.
Got him. Try and hug me now! Aroooooooooo! The Grey Wolf strikes again!
Hey, I like that!
Lol. It fainted.
And Charmander got yet another level up. Now he’s level ten.
You know, this is the only video game I know where you don’t start at level one.
I defeated Rival Brown! *does special I-beat-Brown victory dance*
Now he’s talking about the Pokémon League. Tough trainers, yeah.
I’ll beat them all.
I should quit dawdling? The nerve of that kid!
And now he bogs off.
Back to the Pokémon Centre for me, then.
*yawn*
Chapter Six-Viridian City (3) and Route 22 (2)
Another boring journey later...
I heal my Charmander, going through the same Nurse Joy spiel all over again.
Now I’ve got some PokéBalls, let’s go get me a Spearow!
West we go again!
Aw, crud. It’s Brown.
Yeah, hi.
Pokémon League? What’s that? I should forget it?
He wants me to get memory loss like him and his grandpa! No! I shall resist!
Badges? What are badges, and why won’t the guard let me through without them?
Yes, my Pokémon did get stronger! Of course they did!
Ooh, a battle!
Rival Brown would like to battle! Duh...
OMG his turtle mutated into a Pidgey! No, hang on. It’s just a different Pokémon.
It’s a higher level than me, but Ember it anyway.
Aw, snap! It got a critical hit!
Now...it is time. Use the Potion!
Use on which Pokémon?
...
What are you on? There’s only Charmander!
*glug glug*
*burp*
Whee! Now Ember again!
My turn for a critical hit!
It chucked sand at Charmander, and now it can’t see properly!
Charmander, for some reason, doesn’t have the presence of mind to wipe it out.
Moron. Just Ember one more time. Gotcha! Pidgey dies!
Well...faints. Same diff.
It’s a level up, and more stupid numbers! The Speed number is pretty big...
Uh-oh. The turtle wants another hug.
Scratch it! Ember won’t work...for some reason.
I mean, it’s not like it’s actual water, right? Just a...hugging turtle.
I missed! And it Tackled Charmander again!
Scratch missed again! Use Growl!
Ah, so that’s what that attack does.
Better use another Potion.
Scratch!
Ooh, it Tail Whipped me. Somehow. With that stubby little tail.
Now it’s a ScratchTackle fest.
Whoa, it critical hit on Charmander! Down to 2 HP.
Time for...dun dun dun... the last Potion!
This is fun... the salamander killed the bird, and now it’s about to kill the turtle.
I hope.
Arceus, this battle is boring.
Charmander keeps missing. Must be all that sand.
Both Pokémon in the red...Scratch. If it misses, I’m toast.
Got him. Try and hug me now! Aroooooooooo! The Grey Wolf strikes again!
Hey, I like that!
Lol. It fainted.
And Charmander got yet another level up. Now he’s level ten.
You know, this is the only video game I know where you don’t start at level one.
I defeated Rival Brown! *does special I-beat-Brown victory dance*
Now he’s talking about the Pokémon League. Tough trainers, yeah.
I’ll beat them all.
I should quit dawdling? The nerve of that kid!
And now he bogs off.
Back to the Pokémon Centre for me, then.
*yawn*
Maybe Wednesday
~green~
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2008
- Messages
- 396
- Reaction score
- 0
- Thread starter
- #25
Another! Longer this time!
I am getting real sick of this Nurse Joy character! Eesh...
Now, this time, can I please catch a Spearow without interruption?
<3 Spearow <3 I gotta have a Spearow!
It will make me the ultimate Pokémon Master! Hopefully...
(Author’s Note: There’s a one in ten chance of encountering a Spearow on Route 22, but Grey doesn’t know that.)
Two Mankey later, I encounter a level 3 Spearow. A girl.
I hope I don’t faint it. That battle with Brown put Charmander up two levels.
So Scratch, and no! It didn’t die! *celebratory glass of champagne*
Now, go PokéBall!
Gotcha! Spearow was caught!
Oh, yeah! *another celebratory glass of champagne*
Spearow’s data was added to the PokéDex. Do I even care?
Busily flits around...whateverr!
No nickname, thanks! Eesh...
Celebration! Let’s all celebrate, and have a good time! Boo-yah!
Well, in all honesty, this Spearow sucks.
I’ll go do some training on Route 1, but I’ll skip it to spare you the agony.
(A while later...)
Finally, Spearow’s at level 6! *whoop*
Let’s hit the road north!
OMG. It’s the dead man, and his loony granddaughter.
He’s not dead, though...*prod*
What does she have to say now?
More to the point, is she sane now?
...
Yep. She’s fine. Talking about shopping in Pewter City.
Shopping? Typical girl.
Let’s just sneeeeak past the old man...
Ah! He apprehended me! And now he’s going on about coffee!
That’s all he needs to...get going?!?!?
And nobody gets the innuendo there. Come on!
The red box I have? What red box?
Oh, the PokéDex!
No, I don’t want your advice, thanks!
Mommy told me never to talk to strange men.
...
Not that he listens to me.
Now he’s lecturing me about the PokéDex!
He seems awfully knowledgeable...
A few seconds ago, he was calling it a “red box”!
NINTENDO, WHERE IS YOUR CONSISTENCY?!?!?!?!?!
...
Of course I know how to catch a Pokémon! I al-
Whaddya mean, you’d better show me?
Look, mister! I already caught one, see? My Spearow!
He’s not listening to me. Sod him.
Oh, look, a convenient Weedle. Level 5.
What is this?
He has no Pokémon, he doesn’t weaken it, and he uses ONE PokéBall?
Again, Nintendo, where is your consistency?
Oak was just telling me that I absolutely HAD to weaken it.
Now this old geezer just...
Eesh.
What’s he on about now? *sigh*
...
What the hell do you mean, it was educational?
Are you not listening?
I. Have. Already. Caught. A. POKÉMON!
*sobs* This old man is so cruel!
Huh? A present? For me?
Must be making up for his stupidity.
He thinks I’m some materialistic kid who has no ethics.
I am! *grab*
A...Teachy TV?
What is this? Playhouse Disney?
So I should watch it if there’s something I don’t understand...
I’ll tell you what I don’t understand!
Your utter stupidity, that’s what!
Oh, it’ll teach me about the basics of being a Pokémon Trainer, will it?
So, not content with filling my head with Pokémon-catching theories that directly contradict Professor Oak’s...
You foist this useless doohickey upon me to poison my brain even more?
Thank Arceus, he finally stopped talking!
Wait, let’s chuck that dumb TV out.
*rummages through bag* Aha!
Hang on...what makes this a “key item”? Ah, just toss it!
What? I can’t toss it?
What, why not? Is it...stuck to my hand? Or what?
Oh, I get it! Because it’s in a particular pocket of my Bag, I can’t throw it away!
WTF?
Damn you to hell, Nintendo.
As I was saying, before we were so rudely interrupted... *glares pointedly at old man*
Let’s go north!
I don’t know why I’m going north...
Wait, yes I do!
It’s my psychic power, guiding me forth! Huzzah!
(Author’s note: Grey’s “psychic power” is more like “Kenji has played this game before but it was so long ago that his memory is full of holes” It makes for great fun!)
Chapter Seven-Viridian City (4) and Route 22 (3)
I am getting real sick of this Nurse Joy character! Eesh...
Now, this time, can I please catch a Spearow without interruption?
<3 Spearow <3 I gotta have a Spearow!
It will make me the ultimate Pokémon Master! Hopefully...
(Author’s Note: There’s a one in ten chance of encountering a Spearow on Route 22, but Grey doesn’t know that.)
Two Mankey later, I encounter a level 3 Spearow. A girl.
I hope I don’t faint it. That battle with Brown put Charmander up two levels.
So Scratch, and no! It didn’t die! *celebratory glass of champagne*
Now, go PokéBall!
Gotcha! Spearow was caught!
Oh, yeah! *another celebratory glass of champagne*
Spearow’s data was added to the PokéDex. Do I even care?
Busily flits around...whateverr!
No nickname, thanks! Eesh...
Celebration! Let’s all celebrate, and have a good time! Boo-yah!
Well, in all honesty, this Spearow sucks.
I’ll go do some training on Route 1, but I’ll skip it to spare you the agony.
(A while later...)
Finally, Spearow’s at level 6! *whoop*
Let’s hit the road north!
OMG. It’s the dead man, and his loony granddaughter.
He’s not dead, though...*prod*
What does she have to say now?
More to the point, is she sane now?
...
Yep. She’s fine. Talking about shopping in Pewter City.
Shopping? Typical girl.
Let’s just sneeeeak past the old man...
Ah! He apprehended me! And now he’s going on about coffee!
That’s all he needs to...get going?!?!?
And nobody gets the innuendo there. Come on!
The red box I have? What red box?
Oh, the PokéDex!
No, I don’t want your advice, thanks!
Mommy told me never to talk to strange men.
...
Not that he listens to me.
Now he’s lecturing me about the PokéDex!
He seems awfully knowledgeable...
A few seconds ago, he was calling it a “red box”!
NINTENDO, WHERE IS YOUR CONSISTENCY?!?!?!?!?!
...
Of course I know how to catch a Pokémon! I al-
Whaddya mean, you’d better show me?
Look, mister! I already caught one, see? My Spearow!
He’s not listening to me. Sod him.
Oh, look, a convenient Weedle. Level 5.
What is this?
He has no Pokémon, he doesn’t weaken it, and he uses ONE PokéBall?
Again, Nintendo, where is your consistency?
Oak was just telling me that I absolutely HAD to weaken it.
Now this old geezer just...
Eesh.
What’s he on about now? *sigh*
...
What the hell do you mean, it was educational?
Are you not listening?
I. Have. Already. Caught. A. POKÉMON!
*sobs* This old man is so cruel!
Huh? A present? For me?
Must be making up for his stupidity.
He thinks I’m some materialistic kid who has no ethics.
I am! *grab*
A...Teachy TV?
What is this? Playhouse Disney?
So I should watch it if there’s something I don’t understand...
I’ll tell you what I don’t understand!
Your utter stupidity, that’s what!
Oh, it’ll teach me about the basics of being a Pokémon Trainer, will it?
So, not content with filling my head with Pokémon-catching theories that directly contradict Professor Oak’s...
You foist this useless doohickey upon me to poison my brain even more?
Thank Arceus, he finally stopped talking!
Wait, let’s chuck that dumb TV out.
*rummages through bag* Aha!
Hang on...what makes this a “key item”? Ah, just toss it!
What? I can’t toss it?
What, why not? Is it...stuck to my hand? Or what?
Oh, I get it! Because it’s in a particular pocket of my Bag, I can’t throw it away!
WTF?
Damn you to hell, Nintendo.
As I was saying, before we were so rudely interrupted... *glares pointedly at old man*
Let’s go north!
I don’t know why I’m going north...
Wait, yes I do!
It’s my psychic power, guiding me forth! Huzzah!
(Author’s note: Grey’s “psychic power” is more like “Kenji has played this game before but it was so long ago that his memory is full of holes” It makes for great fun!)
polelover44
BACK!!
- Joined
- Dec 23, 2008
- Messages
- 1,445
- Reaction score
- 0
ADDICTED. GIVE MOAR OR WILL KEEP POSTING IN ALL CAPS.
ShinjiLover
New Member
- Joined
- Dec 11, 2008
- Messages
- 532
- Reaction score
- 1
Excuse me, girls read this, you know. >.> Sexist.
Maybe Wednesday
~green~
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2008
- Messages
- 396
- Reaction score
- 0
- Thread starter
- #30
It's Grey, not me! ^.^
- Joined
- Jan 1, 2003
- Messages
- 16,514
- Reaction score
- 311
ShinjiLover, since when can't characters be jackasses without it reflecting on the author?
Kenji Sakasi
Nyaaa?
- Joined
- Jan 1, 2009
- Messages
- 7
- Reaction score
- 0
Your bag seems to have an extra pocket...
ShinjiLover
New Member
- Joined
- Dec 11, 2008
- Messages
- 532
- Reaction score
- 1
The same reason you can't seem to get off my ass. ^_~
- Joined
- Jan 1, 2003
- Messages
- 16,514
- Reaction score
- 311
Oh for pete's sake. You're the one who got all wounded over a character making an offhandedly mildly sexist comment and accused the AUTHOR of sexism.
ShinjiLover
New Member
- Joined
- Dec 11, 2008
- Messages
- 532
- Reaction score
- 1
You couldn't see I was kidding? >.> God. I definitely don't think Kenji is sexist. You don't have to get all snippy, so get your ass off your high and mighty throne.
- Joined
- Dec 14, 2008
- Messages
- 4,183
- Reaction score
- 92
Your usage of a double negative confuses me.
Similar threads
