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Are We Heroes?

As usual, a fantastic fanfic courtesy of Gastly's Mama. Although it was only six chapters, you managed to fit in so much. Brilliant!
 
I read over 30 books or so every month, and I enjoyed this more than all most every teen fiction(ugh) I have ever read. You can hold more than a candle to Orson Scott Card, Timothy Zahn, Arron Allston, Clive Clussler, etc. BRA-VO!!!
 
I know it's a little late to post here, but I gotta say...
This fic was awesome! I could actually feel the characters excitement, You made it very realistic too, by bringing in the FEAR strategy and baton passing to Snorlax. I was able to make an actual team like that (Umreon FTW!) and it did great on Shoddy. Anyhow, this was truly an amazing story.
 
I joined this site to look for awesome fanfics and i got what i wanted right here :O very well done
 
I read over 30 books or so every month, and I enjoyed this more than all most every teen fiction(ugh) I have ever read. You can hold more than a candle to Orson Scott Card, Timothy Zahn, Arron Allston, Clive Clussler, etc. BRA-VO!!!

Wow, thank you very much.

I know it's a little late to post here, but I gotta say...
This fic was awesome! I could actually feel the characters excitement, You made it very realistic too, by bringing in the FEAR strategy and baton passing to Snorlax. I was able to make an actual team like that (Umreon FTW!) and it did great on Shoddy. Anyhow, this was truly an amazing story.

This is the ultimate compliment - that you used the tactics I used in my fanfic on shoddy! xD
 
Lol, it destroyed another team in a full sweep all by itself.
 
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A nice conclusion. That's basically all I have to say. You wrapped up the short story pretty well, although it seemed more like an ending that would have been used in a long story like mine.

Unfortunately, I'm going to have to drop that line as I rate this fic for the awards.

Level of darkness: 16/20

Being a dark fic, this one was quite angsty and prickly with emotion as you kept reading through, full of things that just seem wrong, like Boss' lack of sympathy for anything and the murder of various characters.

Even the scene after the end of the story was riddled with emotion. Although I guess that's not specifically to do with darkness, but you do show how hardened Brains is after the whole incident.

Characterization: 15/20

Throughout the story, you make the people into real people, with their emotions showing at every turn - especially Brains, the protagonist.

Plot: 13/20

One slightly weak point in the story. It didn't really seem to go anywhere that wasn't separate of your exploration of Brains' character. But, again, I can't really blame you for that, because the plot is really just a vehicle for moving the characters forward in this story.

It's strange, though - my stories are usually the exact opposite - I only give them character so that they can advance the plot forward.

Grammar, style, and flow: 7/10

The present tense makes the story feel just a little clumsy.

Overall rating: 76/100

Once again, like in Rival's Story, the plot can't affect the rating too much, simply because the story isn't about the plot - the plot is just a vehicle to bring the rest of the story forward.
 
I've finally read this, and I have to say, I can't believe I didn't sooner. This is one of the best things I've read, and, in my opinion, your best work.

Although it's true that there's not much of a plot, the characters more than make up for it. The nagging doubt in Brains' personality just really does it for me.

You also do very well with description- enough to help me imagine the different locales, not enough to drown me with it, and you stuck to the important things. But it is true that the individual Pokémon could've done with some description of their own. Other than that, spot-on.

I really, really liked it.
 
wow! I just finished reading this and it's just plain awesome :) keep up the good work :p
 
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