I'm not laughing, far from it, I think you might be a genius I'll try Slowpoke out. I couldn't get past the stupid-lookingness of Slowpoke before, but Slowking is probably not something to be messed with...
It's true. He's become really helpful, especially since I can use Power Gem, Zen Headbutt, and Water Pulse with him. And he's shiny to boot!
Smogon University entry for Slowking (B/W version, but there are archived strategies for its other versions):
Slowking (B/W) - Smogon University
It's pretty useful in HGSS if you started with Cyndaquil
Wiggly Fucking tuff, plain, outdone by Clefable, not particularly good at anything, but heavens, it was fun to use it! mine knows an array of special moves making her have total coverage (IIRC).